Hey, no homo, but I am sitting on the broken swing set out back in the perfect, quiet, 2:00am blackness and picturing the softness of your voice and the darkness of your eyes with such perfect and terrible clarity that it feels like I'm choking on my own heartbeat.

Now I'm eating croutons straight out of the bag.

Still no homo ?

I'm gonna level with you, friend: I am eating these croutons gay style.

nobody warns you this but addiction happens without you noticing and one of the first things that it attacks is your ability to care. if you find yourself using recreational drugs every day, stop and take one day a week sober. if you struggle with this or if you don't see the point of the exercise, you are likely already addicted and you need help.

Welcome to the Protestant Work Ethic where if you are not working for 16 hours a day you are a Sinner that will Burn In Hell. Unless of course you are rich in which case you are Blessed by God and can go to Heaven without lifting a finger.

*blinking crusty eyes like a newborn animal* jul y ???

fuckihg SEPYEMBER?

I am actually so serious I think it really messes with a childs creativity and joy to tell them to never make a mary sue OC. Like that unbridaled form of joy where you make a self insert OC who super cool and everyone loves them and they have every superpower in the world SHOULD be something a kid makes, it nourishes their ability to create things for fun and not be stifled by "oh but what if my character is too overpowered and cringey...". whatever

can’t trust anyone who criticises the mamma mia movie. like wtf are you even criticising. the plot?? the characterisation?? my brother in christ they put meryl streep, colin firth and amanda seyfried on an island, got them drunk and asked them to sing abba songs in the campest way possible that’s LITERALLY. IT. by this point you have to just assume that you’re the problem.

[big crashing sound] Did anyone else hear that!? I think God fell from the Kingdom of Heaven! Come on everyone, let's feast on his corpse until something bad happens!

whalefalls

^these are the additions I want on my posts. Take notes people

Every time i get to say "I'm not on tiktok" out loud to people irl the superiority i feel is indescribable

Going to stupid bed at a stupid reasonable hour for my stupid mental health.