Sometimes I'm a philosopher @thephilosophah - Tumblr Blog

EVA STRATT + BOOK QUOTES PROJECT HAIL MARY

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charlottan

lets make jokes that dont make sense and are bad

#on it boss

hussyknee

How long have you been on Tumblr?

Over 16 years (before 2010) (toddlers in the dawn of the ant colony)

16 to 14 years (2010-2012) (livejournal and Myspace refugees)

13 to 11 years (2013-2015) (you used to follow thebootydiaries)

10 to 8 years (2016-2018) (era of Russian bot conspiracy)

7 to 3.5 years (2019-2022) (post sex ban to Goncharov)

3.5 years or less (2023–2026) (Twitter refugee)

Remaining time: 4 days 6 hours

Rebagel for science pls.

#i have a confession. i dont actually know who the bootydiaries is.

importantcatpics

fuckyeahchinesefashion

OP: My chickens refuse to roost on their perches, so I’m trying to find their leader among them.

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pissvortex

overwatch had the right idea when they made every sniper in the game weak to a gorilla that could leap to your position and beat you to death. i think this should be a more common game design choice for multiplayer games

#overwatch

gay--dog

man half of my mutuals are named some shit like Snooble at this point im doing some poob as bullshit in my life

discount--dracula

wbat the hell you weren't even exaggerating

anotherhawk

Eva Stratt does NOT need a redemption arc. Eva Stratt did EVERYTHING WRONG so that no-one else would have to. Her hands are permanently stained with blood so humanity gets to keep on living.

I hope they pirated Minecraft on those computers. I think Rocky would like it

#phm

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penny-anna

what the hell is going on

penny-anna

i believe in you Binface. you can do it. this could be your moment.

penny-anna

Please god it would be so funny

penny-anna

there is no downside to voting for Count Binface. its not taking away from other candidates bcos they aren't any and the more votes he gets the stupider Farage looks.

penny-anna

for people out of the loop:

Nigel Farage is the leader of Reform UK, a far right party who are currently in the process of a serious bid to become the UK government. they are just straight up evil.

Count Binface is an intergalactic space warrior with a bin on his head. he likes to run as a novelty candidate in general and mayoral elections. a big thing he likes to do is run as a candidate against the incumbent prime minister:

(Also pictured: Boris Johnson, Elmo)

Anyway, in brief:

Nigel Farage is currently in the midst of a big scandal about his finances

He has decided to deal with this by 1) making a show of nobly resigning from parliament and then 2) immediately running in the resulting by-election

He has stated that he is letting 'the people' judge his actions and implied that if he wins that will prove that he has been exonerated in the court of public opinion

His goal was presumably to get a big resounding win over the other parties, proving that The People still love him.

the other parties have thus far decided that this is a 'vanity election' and, well, there is one very easy way to ensure that he will not beat any of them, and that is simply not to play.

and as a result the only person who has so far confirmed they are running against him is Count Binface. no matter the outcome this makes Nigel Farage look like, u know, a fucking clown.

netnel

mudwerks

Bringing you more Bad Books and Immodest Pictures, your Impure Thoughts Stockpile was getting low.

radetzkymarch

alexxuun

Grace think fondly of his scar if you even care.

#phm

adachi

I had someone ask me "where are the pokemon cards" and I tried to direct her to the kids section and she got really indignat and went "no. Pokemon cards. Theyre like, collectibles" and I had to go No I know what those are. Those are kids playing cards. Kids section

adachi

She was trying to look behind the counter where we keep Gold Jewelry and Gucci Purses for pokemon cards

adachi

Pivotal information I think everyone should know: this was at a thrift store

pechuyu

Got a silly idea for a comic while studying inuktitut

#avatar #atla

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vampirejuno

Can you imagine being stuck in space completely alone with only the corpses of your friends for company, and the first living thing you meet after 46 years of that misery is a fucking weird alien creature who just rolls up with crazy advanced tech and goes "hi let's work together" and makes it possible for you to save your world through the power of friendship and molecular biology. AND THEN you find out that in this creature's language, its name means "mercy". Happened to my good friend Rocky btw

#phm

unalivejournal

Ok. What you're gonna want to do is chop up a cucumber and put it in a bowl. Then you're gonna sprinkle a generous portion of salt on top. Then you're gonna drizzle them with a balsamic vinaigrette and gently shake to combine, leaving you with a cool and refreshing summer snack. In 15 seconds dangerous and burly men are going to drag me away to an unknown second location. Remember everything I've taught you. I love you

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Sometimes I'm a philosopher