“gender envy” this “gender envy” that,,, sir that man is a senior citizen
I don't plan on being 19 - 24 forever ????? Gender investment.

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@theeundertaker
“gender envy” this “gender envy” that,,, sir that man is a senior citizen
I don't plan on being 19 - 24 forever ????? Gender investment.

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i think people in the middle ages acutally did know how to make photorealistic drawings they just chose not to because it’s funnier to draw some fucked up creature
they actually did make photorealistic drawings things just looked different back then
JOHN GREEN HAS ANNOUNCED HE IS BUILDING A TEMPLE TO COCK
you guys are evil as fuck lol. this video announces the building of a new maternity ward in Sierra Leone. he & hank have spent years fundraising, campaigning, and donating for this cause, and it’s going to save tens of thousands of women’s and children’s lives.
if your reaction to this is to use the opportunity to contribute to a years-old, stale “joke,” consider that instead of contributing to harass the man, you could try doing something good for the world.
yeah idk if you have a leg to stand on here with that username i’m gonna be honest
i woke up at 3:30 AM for no reason and i've never lived in the midwest but i'm considering making snickers salad because i saw a tumblr post about it
püdding
internet said add milk
whip cream
the dogs have woken up to stare blearily at me. they're not even begging for food they're just judging
thank you for your support 🫡
you know there’s actually something really satisfying about the meaty “thwap” sound of apple bits slapping against the apparently taut surface of some kind of unholy pudding/milk/whipt cream hybrid
oh kevin perjurer we’re in it now
critics are raving!
my ex was a goth influencer and once upon a time we went to salem massachusetts (of the salem witch trials) and she got recognized by multiple people off the street and like. in hindsight that's kind of charming? like yeah i guess this is the place where people would know goth microcelebrities. where else in the world. this isn't related to the snickers btw
@feraladoration tbh as soon as i saw the poll for which midwestern food was most disgusting i really thought snickers salad sounded kind of passable so i immediately shuffled off to target, zombie-like, in order to buy pudding and apples
this was like a couple weeks ago and ever since i've just been waiting to be activated like some kind of foreign food concoction sleeper agent
my cat thinks i'm making her breakfast and is now trying to climb my legs to get to the snickers salad
i’m not really sure what the snickers to apple ratio is supposed to be here i’m just following my heart
snickers salad sweep!!!!!!!!!!!!
update: whole bag
the unknowable cries of the human soul
for maximum comedic effect i just want you all to know that i haven't tried this at all while i work on it. i want it to be a surprise
update: poured myself a bowl, got distracted by making this post and put it down somewhere adn now i don't know where. dangerous game to play with multiple large dogs in the house
all right lads. its time
its bad
None of this is in the Bible
i mean there was an apple in the bible. that was a pretty significant thing that happened. like i understand where you’re coming from here but there very much was an apple
There was an unspecified fruit in the bible, probably pomegranate given its popularity in the region historically. The depiction of the unspecified fruit as an apple comes from Roman puns around the latin word for "bad".
I feel like Tumblr would appreciate my dad's take on the coronation

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Folks, friends, y’all…. esk*mo is a slur. I understand a lot of people don’t know that, I don’t want to be a dick about it, but I’ve been seeing it in fics. Wanna write “esk*mo kisses”? Just say “nuzzled noses” or something.
I’m not here to call anybody out, it’s been in multiple fics, I’m not vague posting. This is just a psa. 👍🏻
If you could help me spread awareness about this by reblogging, I’d really appreciate it.
I’ve had this post on insta saved for sometime ❤️
[Text Description: “Hey! Reminder: Eskimo is a slur. It means ‘snow eaters’ in Cree and is a slur against Inuit . Also don’t use ‘Eskimo kisses’. It’s called Kunik. It is a greeting mostly used for family… Kunik was how I’d greet my mom and grandmother as a small child.” /TD]
I'd love to bask in this and laugh my arse off at the disconnect between the propaganda and the actual feeling of people, but ...
How long are we going to tolerate this?
fascinating to watch society increasingly work itself into contortions about how to make a principled distinction between boy tits (pedestrial!) and girl tits (taboo!) because even as the rigid gender binary is slowly chipped away, we can’t handle the fact someone somewhere might be turned on
some breast cancer survivors have breasts but no nipples; are their chests nsfw? if they have their nipple transplanted to their forehead, must it be covered? if i have my nipples moved to my forehead but then later acquire tits via hrt or breast implants, then are they nsfw? why is a trans man’s chest post top surgery sfw but not pre? why is a flat-chested woman’s chest never sfw? what if someone refuses to disclose their AGAB? must they wear Schroedinger’s Sports Bra at all times? if someone transitions, has top surgery, then decides to go back to identifying as a woman, does their chest become NSFW again, or does it remain SFW?
so many philosophical questions! and what a waste of human brain power and technical ability to spend it all on arcane points of content moderation. at what point does this all become such a drag on our economy, that we have to jettison our hangups or else permit innovation to grind to a halt?
seinfeld has remained so popular bc ultimately all anyone wants is 3 friends with no life and who are committed to the bit
the met gala is on monday so I’m reintroducing the idea that the crowd should get to decide whether or not a celebrity followed the theme & if the popular vote is no they get a bucket of nickelodeon green slime poured over their head

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David Lynch shows off his Nine Inch Nails - The Downward Spiral CD
Gordon Ramsey finds tile smeared with doodoo on kitchen nightmares
phoebe bridgers styled by jared ellner and photographed by davis bates
me and my fiancee getting married
at work the other day this nice older woman asked me what pronouns i use and it caught me extremely off guard bc no one there had asked me that and i was also not expecting to have a conversation with her in the first place and i said I used they/them and she was like Ahh that’s nice i love that good for you :) and i just had a little spring in my step the rest of the day bc it was just a pleasant interaction. the thing is though. I do Not use they/them i use she/her. i just panicked in the moment and said the wrong answer

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It’s so fucked up how tiktok culture has made clout-poisoned people turn the public into content, every day I see people minding their business have their entire faces put online for thousands of likes, a couple kissing on the train, a lady dancing across a cross walk, a guy nodding his head to the music at a club, a lady buying a banana at the store, ring camera footage of the neighbors kids being stupid. Just let people live jfc
I think I may have made it seem like this is about wholesome content (which my sentiment towards that is the same) but most of the time when I see this stuff people are being ridiculed for being completely normal. And I didn’t make up any of these examples btw, I couldn’t find the dance one but only because there are too many videos of people being recorded at cross walks
(Faces censored and additional text added by me)
Im gonna add this to every post about this i see im never gonna shut up about it. This will get people killed. This will ruin lives. More people live in hiding than you think. So many people are one post away from having to abandon their whole lives. Dont ever post anything of anyone without their consent, stranger or not.
Being overstimulated is such a weird thing to explain to people. Like "hey sorry, I'm not mad at you and this is nobody's fault and I'm not blaming anyone for it happening, I am aware this is a part of regular everyday life but I am mentally crumbling because There Have Been Things Happening nonstop for 5 hours straight back to back with no breaks, and I really need to sit down in complete silence for like 15-25 minutes, after which I will be completely fine and can proceed as normal. But if I'm not allowed to have that, I will resort to violence."