The Ekko System

i should NOT be an elder queer, i should be middle at most. i am a middle aged queer. most of the elder queers died.

when i was growing up i didn't go to pride parades, i went to pride marches. because that's 100% what they were in the 80s and 90s.

I was always kind of grateful that the marches slowly became parades. That the protests slowly gave way to parties. It was progress, it was healing.

I was grateful for that because I never healed.

I’m still remembering how straight society turned their collective backs on us and let us die. I will never forgive or forget that. Maybe that’s a shortcoming on my part but it’s true. I’ve tried and I can’t. That scar runs too deep.

And now we’re back to the same shit again. Straight society is turning their backs on my trans brothers and sisters. Ignoring their pain. Trying to legislate them out of existence.

Even our so-called allies are saying shit like “well if we want to appeal to a broader base we can’t keep going on about the transgender thing.” Fuck you Gavin Newsom. In particular.

Make no mistake: they want us dead. Not just closeted, not just silent. Gone. Non-existent. And I say us because they’re just starting with the trans people. They’ll come after the rest of us if they succeed.

I am old and so, so tired.

Point Defiance Steps

Mates

Rising Tides

This marks the first so let’s make it a great one!

this moment is going down in history guys

here’s some shtuff I saw that I thought felt appropriate to post today! :) let’s feel love for ourselves guys! And anyone who sees this post and isn’t Multigender (you are still lovely) try to continue spreading the love- better yet tell a Multigender friend/family member how special they are!

and I thought for funsies I’d put my previous bigender drawings :)

lime/green: nonbinary

lemon/yellow: agender

orange: boy

grapefruit/pinkredish: demigirl

"This is an LGBT safe space. Of COURSE I fully support individuals who identify as transgender and their right to self-determination! I just think that transitioning is a very serious choice and should be heavily regulated. And there could be a lot of harm in exposing cis children to such topics, so we should be really careful about when it is appropriate to mention trans issues or have too much trans visibility."

apparently he (who through my drunken memory I remember only as Earl) liked some woman, and she told him that he wasn't cultured enough and needed to attend his first drag show (she also flaked on him)

Now I'm reasonably androgynous and was wearing makeup, a short leather skirt, and black heeled boots, but still when this guy came up to me when I was standing off alone and asked "So. Do you come here often?" with a very earnest expression, I thought. Surely not. This guy doesn't think I'm a straight woman does he????

Anyway I start talking with this guy and he has no idea what the fuck is going on but he is just a very kind and earnest dude and asked a lot of questions (while asking if it was alright if he asked those questions). I track down my husband and friends and I'm like y'all. We need to make sure that Earl has a Good Fucking Time tonight.

Man was completely out of his depth. At one point they put on a puppy auction to raise money for Pride, that started with a 6 ft drag queen in all her glory leading a leather pup out on a leash to the tune of that damned RSPCA "in the arms of the angels" song

We look at Earl. Nervous. He squints, laughs, and then goes "I was wondering why people were dressed like that!" He turned to me and asked "So they're like dogs?" And I said yeah pretty much. And he just chuckled and went "Yeah I thought so with the tails! Never seen this before!"

When the first drag king came out, Earl looked at me wide eyed and went "There's a dude version too?!" And I said yeah they're called drag kings. And he said, low, "Drag kings."

During one of the queens performances, he frowned, shook his head and told me, "Your legs are better than hers." in a tone that implied he thought there was some travesty taking place and I should also be getting paid

When he found out I was there with my husband (and that I am not a woman) he profusely apologized and said "I'm so sorry, it's dark in here and I thought you were a hot chick! I wouldn't have said nothing if I knew you had a husband, I'm so sorry about that."

When beemovie invited me to the dance floor with him later and I still had a drink in my hand, Earl said "Oh don't worry about that I can hold your drink, you get on out there and shake your ass with your husband!" Then before we left, Earl bought me drinks for "Putting up with me all night and answering everything. Y'all helped me have a great time tonight."

like. You gotta recognize there's going to people who have never had interacted outside of their of their own community. This includes you. And just because your community is familiar with all the right vocabulary and how to correctly say something, it doesn't mean they're actually going to support you. If someone like Earl shows up, confused and out of their depth but kind and curious and earnest, you gotta have patience and truck through the small things, so when he goes back to his friends and his coworkers and they snicker asking how the drag show was, he can genuinely talk about how included we tried to make him feel and that he had a great time

buying him time