So I was talking about pisces people and a friend called them Spicies.
That's it.
I will never not call them Spicies now, it's too fitting lol.
Also hello everyone, I have not been on Tumblr for years.

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@thecaptainscribbles
So I was talking about pisces people and a friend called them Spicies.
That's it.
I will never not call them Spicies now, it's too fitting lol.
Also hello everyone, I have not been on Tumblr for years.

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getting over the fear of being bad is so fucking hard⌠like, itâs literally a super power if you can start something and say âit doesnât matter if itâs bad, it just matters that it existsâ
âbadâ is so terrifying, âbadâ is wrecking, and the ability to apply self-compassion to things deemed âbadâ is beyond amazing, to understand not everything in life will be âgoodâ and thatâs okay
essays, art, novels, school, relationships, anyone out there starting things when they are terrified of the arbitrary metric of the result⌠I am so fucking proud of you, you are so brave and strong
keep starting new things, even if âbadâ is a possibilityÂ
âBadâ comprises each step of a staircase. Youâve got an unreachable top floor and the first several steps arenât gonna do anything to help you. Heck, theyâre not gonna do anything other than be an obstacle, maybe an âuglyâ one too.
You pile âbadâ on top of âbadâ, one âbadâ at a time and eventually you will reach the top. And your staircase will get you to a higher place. Itâll be beautiful.
Without the âbadâ thereâs no âgoodâ. Without steps thereâs no staircase. Embrace the âbadâ and acknowledge that whatâs important isnât that momentary result, itâs the progress you build on top of it.
people have a tendency to think/act like executive dysfunction is just laziness, and theres a lot of posts on a lot of platforms disputing that idea, but im just gonna share something that happened to me this morning, because i think its worth sharing. i got up, took my meds, went downstairs and made myself breakfast. i sat down at the table to eat, and i stopped. not because id forgotten something, or because anything happened, i just, stopped. i was hungry, i was consciously aware of the fact that i was hungry, and there was food right in front of me. so i sat there, not doing anything, for at least ten minutes, because my brain would not let me eat. thats not laziness, even if laziness were real(which i really dont think it is), thats not it. so no, executive dysfunction is not just being lazy, because if it was it wouldnt have taken me ten minutes to start eating the toast on the plate right in front of me when i was hungry.
Yeah, to me lazy is an act of choice. You donât care about dishes because the maid cleans them, so you choose to lounge or nap instead. Iâm sure laziness exists, I have no doubts, and it can be enabled. Having someone do everything for you, giving you the free choice to either be active or be lazy, is an enabler.
But the lazy itself is a choice. Itâs in the definition of the word. Youâre lazy so you buy food pre-made rather than make your own. Itâs nothing negative.
To me, itâs no longer lazy when someone wants to do something, but canât or is stopped by a barrier, psychological or otherwise. I want to get up and shower, I know I will feel better after, not getting up makes me feel physically ill and yet I canât even stand up from the chair. It makes me feel progressively worse. I really want to, but I canât get my body to move.
Itâs unfair to label me as lazy, itâs not my choice and I find it distressing enough without being labeled as such.
For context, you can have executive dysfunction and be lazy too. For me, executive dysfunction is one of the hardest to cope with symptom of ADHD. It paralyzes me so much that sometimes I canât even go to the toilet because I canât get up off the chair. I want to play a game but I canât get myself to start it. Iâm also lazy about plenty of stuff lol. Iâm too lazy to cook for example. Itâs not something I enjoy, and although I could do it, and I have done it, itâs not my thing, and itâs not a necessity. I can recognize and admit it. Itâs my own choice. My boyfriend cooks instead because itâs something he enjoys. Prior to meeting him, I was eating prepackaged foods, not because I couldnât cook, but because I had no interest in it. Iâm lazy about going out after working all day. I can do it, I sometimes do it, but the majority of time, I donât want to do it, because I prefer relaxing and watching TV. I know it would be healthy for me to go out more, but I donât, by choice.
So yeah. In essence... Itâs the difference between unable and unwilling.
There's an old saying (I think it's Russian): the same boiling water that softens the potato will harden the egg
God what a mood.Â
This sort of mindset should become more popular because thereâs a staggering amount of people who think putting others under pressure is the only way to solve problems and thatâs simply not true.
I know personally I experienced this due to exigent parents, while having undiagnosed ADHD and all it ever did was make me shut down. Iâve only started to improve and be better after moving out and being given the freedom to do things in a way that worked for me.
Ok but instructions sometimes really do sound like this when you have ADHD. đđ

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Men are told âmen donât cryâ because crying is seen as a female (ie subhuman) behavior and men are expected to adhere to the dignity of their class which confers the right to be considered fully human. If a man displays feminine behavior heâs punished because he is adopting the traits of second class citizens and not fully living up to his societally granted right to be considered superior. This is not a punishment for men. This is the subjugation of women that backfires in menâs faces because theyâre too stupid and myopic to realize that everyone needs to express emotional weakness from time to time to be mentally healthy
My boyfriend breaks my heart sometimes because of this. Not because âmen donât cryâ, heâs never once gone around saying that, nor has he made any allusion to the idea that crying is a girlâs thing, or that only girls cry.
But he has said, multiple times, when I asked him why he never cries in front of me, âI have to be strong. Someone has to be strong. I have to smile and keep going to give you the strength and inspiration to do the same.â
This is a common phenomenon
Mood.Â
I do think it shouldnât be associated with the word ârevengeâ though, because people have weird ideas about it. It gives the impression that itâs a conscious choice people make out of spite, that they could just... not make lol.
But most who experience it arenât just, revengeful people taking a stance in sheer stubbornness lol, rather, theyâre simply stressed out and unable to unwind, relax or cope with it. Itâs a basic fundamental need, no one enjoys a life under permanent stress, only to go to bed and wake up to face it again.Â
i may be burnt out but i *am* over it
I get this lol. I used to draw 24/7, there wasnât a day when I wasnât drawing. I always thought it was My Thing and My Passion and My Identity. But I found out eventually that it was actually a passion for discovery and experimentation (improving in art includes both of them, it takes exploration and experimentation to get better), coupled with a very intense need to express myself during crappy times.Â
Most of my art was vent art. It was indeed my âIdentityâ, but only because my identity was, in essence, suffering. I was in pain constantly with no way to let it out and no one to talk to.Â
My passion for art faltered when I found other ways to vent, and vanished completely when I moved out and started enjoying life lol.
in all seriousness it's very alienating knowing theres Something Wrong With You. like seeing your mental illness come through in your behaviour and thought processes and knowing it's irrational and unhealthy, knowing other people are reading you as weird or stupid, and not being able to do anything about it is such a lonely experience
God, what a mood. Iâve felt this throughout my entire childhood/teenagehood, before getting diagnosed. Itâs particularly distressing when you havenât yet been diagnosed and no one seems to think thereâs anything wrong with you beyond âweirdâ, âlazyâ and âstupidâ. You know thereâs something wrong, but you donât know what, so all you can do is internalize all the negative shit you hear.Â
like literally no one with any understanding of critical disability theory whatsoever is arguing that communism will cure adhd or any other conditions. if thatâs your understanding of the subject, youâre not in a position to talk about it at all
the idea is not âyou will be cured of adhd, which would totally still be a useful category somehowâ itâs âthese physiological and behavioral traits you understand as âsymptomsâ, while possibly remaining a part of your life, would be accommodated so that they are no longer debilitating in the way that disability is currently constructed under capitalismâ
Mood. I see a lot of people arguing under the idea of âHow is this going to accommodate my memory loss or my RSD reactions, or my emotional dysregulationâ.Â
But itâs not about that type of accommodation and I donât think these people get that. Itâs not all about âBeing able to see without glasses despite having nearsightednessâ, but rather about the difference between having nearsightedness, and being placed at the back of a class, with no glasses, and being placed at the front of a class. The disability doesnât disappear, Itâs still very much there, but the debilitating factor is changed.
You unfortunately need experience to be able to stay open-minded though. A lot of people donât ever find out what itâs like to live under different circumstances, so they embrace the idea that if something is unfixable, then it will remain debilitating regardless of circumstances. Itâs simply not true.
Iâm not arguing that memory loss or emotional dysregulation are going to simply stop being problems we deal with. Iâm very familiar with these myself. But your circumstances will dictate whether they become debilitating or not.
My ADHD as a whole was disabling to the point where I wasnât functional at all, when I lived with my parents, before being diagnosed. I was automatically painted as lazy and incapable, for not adjusting to a set of expectations that everyone assumed was âthe normâ. My efforts were not seen as efforts, but rather, as a lack of interest and care. It was damaging.Â
I lived under the idea that this situation would never improve no matter what. Because ultimately, if I was the problem, how would a change in environment help with anything, right? My brain was the source of the problems, not the inherently unreachable expectations placed upon me, so these problems would remain problems indefinitely. Right?
Ha, wrong. I learned this when I moved out. I moved in with someone who would actually listen, someone who directly countered my ADHD. I live with someone whose response to me being unable to do chores on any given day is âItâs okay, youâre tired, youâve done plenty today, just rest. These chores can wait, and if they canât, Iâll do my best to handle themâ.Â
I live with someone whose response to a bad spell of emotional dysregulation is offering me both space and concern + care, rather than dismissal or an equally overblown reaction, or judgement. Getting extremely emotional and being given space to process it, while equally receiving care, is powerful. Itâs the difference between âStop overreacting, youâre ridiculousâ and âI know youâre upset, can I get you anything, some food? Tea?âÂ
These small changes affect how debilitating ADHD can be. I still have these problems. I still deal with it daily, itâs a part of my life. But theyâre no longer distressing, they donât make my life a living hell anymore. My ADHD didnât change. My environment did.
Weâre social creatures. The society you live in and the people around you directly dictate how you live and how you cope. A problem is only a problem under expectations set too high. And expectations change depending on the people youâre surrounded by. Being ostracized and cast aside for a problem (rather than receiving understanding and help) is a result of society drilling a specific set of ânormalcyâ expectations into each individual, and punishing them for not rising up to them.Â

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Getting a little bit tired of posts that are like âadhd is only a disorder because of capitalismâ as if itâs mr monopoly manâs fault that i struggle to stay committed to artistic projects i undertook personally for myself and that I enjoy, have trouble regulating my emotions, and procrastinate on eating and going to the bathroom.
I get what they are trying to say, but even if capitalism didnât exist I would still want to have things like âthe motivation to clean my living space and the ability to actually notice that itâs dirty.â I know this is part of the misperception of adhd, but adhd doesnât just affect academics and work. It affects EVERYTHING, including your personal goals and your own basic needs
Partial disagree. Mainly because we have no real way of knowing this sort of stuff. But realistically?Â
ADHD symptomatology is directly affected by the environment. I can vouch for this. Growing up between 4 walls, often with a lack of direct care and shared-experiences (most parents nowadays are absent due to working schedules, or too tired to bother during their free time) will intensify them and so will unrestricted access to âpointlessâ entertainment like scrolling on social media. The more âfreedomâ someone has, the harder it is and the more apparent the ADHD will become. The lack of guidance and care means most people will build poor coping mechanisms, to add to it.Â
Thereâs a reason why you can be medicated and still struggle. Even with the physical aspect treated, poor coping mechanisms still hinder progress.
If you consider a different, less artificial environment, such as... say, a tribe, where a child is usually surrounded by multiple adults at a time, is directly included in most activities (since itâs not a situation where adults would âgo to workâ where theyâre ânot allowedâ to bring children), and has ample opportunities to do actually stimulating activities like running around barefoot, dancing, exploring and just getting dirty (as opposed to loafing on a chair or in a bed, eyes glued to a screen)... Well, you get a different scenario.
Also consider how most modern children are expected to spend their most sensitive years in the schooling system. Itâs very unnatural to be expected to wake up before sunrise in order to spend the majority of your day locked up in a horribly understimulating (or overstimulating) room with 10-30 other unrelated children, essentially forced to sit in a chair the entire time. Compare it with the tribal type of raising children, where learning is mostly physical, through following example set by the family, not by a clinical stranger, and finalized with actual results, not in the form of âmarksâ, but in the form of, for example, a successful hunt. âMarksâ have no purpose outside of the schooling system, so for the majority of a personâs early years, thereâs no real feelings of purpose and accomplishments. You donât learn how to be an adult until youâre wildly thrown into it.Â
Add to this the expectations that most modern families have, the pressure that comes with it, the detachment and the lack of involvement and patience on their part due to a lack of time and youâve got the magical mix that contributes to the modern ADHD and the reason why it has become so problematic.
Ok so I've found a way to describe what Neurodivergent Can't Do Task Mode⢠feels like to neurotypicals
So you know how you can't make yourself put your hand down on a hot stovetop? There's a part of your brain that stops you from doing that? That's what Neurodivergent Can't Do Task Mode⢠feels like
Even if we want to do it, there's a barrier stopping us from doing it, and it's really hard to override
And why does our brain see the task as a hot stovetop? Because when neurotypicals finish a task, they get serotonin, but we don't get that satisfaction after completing a task. A neurotypical wouldn't get serotonin from putting their hand on a hot stovetop, it would just hurt. When we can't do a task, it's because our brain knows that the task will hurt (metaphorically) and wants to avoid that.
It's not that we're choosing not to do the task, it's that our brain is physically preventing us from doing it.
Neurotypicals can and should reblog but please don't add anything
(Sorry/not sorry about the random bolding, it makes it easier for us to read)
> Neurotypicals can and should reblog but please donât add anything Implying you can stop me. Honestly, if I wanted to know actual, helpful information on the matter, Tumblr is in hot competition for dead last on the list of places to get the information from; the majority of people here are running the self-diagnosed âuwu Iâm neurodivergentâ gambit.
Youâre not gonna find it in many other places ;). Iâm actually legitimately curious which are the alive first on the list of places for you.
Tumblr shouldnât be glorified or anything, but any community where people can discuss something freely from their POV is a great informational source if you have the smarts to weed through it. It also happens to have a format that promotes an easy way to do so as well, in the form of reblogs and likes and tags. If you find a post with a large amount of notes, where people with an actual diagnosis confirm that information, itâs fairly easy to assume that it has a certain credibility.Â
I donât usually respond to schnazz like this, but ADHD-wise, Tumblr and similar communities are great, and actually much better than many other sources. Why? Because âofficiallyâ, ADHD has mostly been associated and studied @ young boys. Adult ADHD is still not acknowledged in many parts of the world. Girls with ADHD go undiagnosed really often.Â
Iâm female and I was diagnosed at 23. No one ever suspected ADHD (not even myself, even though I looked into it multiple times). You know why? Because itâs hardly ever documented. It looks different from âofficial sourcesâ. I got diagnosed precisely thanks to Tumblr and similar communities, for sharing actual life experiences. Because I stumbled across posts similar to this, dug deeper, and realized that wow, itâs all accurate. All of it.Â
So I went, made a suggestion to my psychiatrist, who scheduled a meeting with me (and my mom, for confirmation of existing symptomatology during childhood years) and would you look at that. I got officially diagnosed and subsequently medicated. And I live a much better life thanks to it :).Â
âThe most natural way for human beings to calm themselves when they are upset is by clinging to another person. This means that patients who have been physically or sexually violated face a dilemma: They desperately crave touch while simultaneously being terrified of body contact. The mind needs to be reeducated to feel physical sensations, and the body needs to be helped to tolerate and enjoy the comforts of touch. Individuals who lack emotional awareness are able, with practice, to connect their physical sensations to psychological events. Then they can slowly reconnect with themselves.â
â Bessel Van der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score
God, mood. Also why growing up in a cold environment, essentially being touch-starved, is so traumatic. Same for needing or requesting comfort and being rejected and isolated in return.Â
legitimate fucking lifehack: discord server literally just for yourself to keep track of stuff over devices. links. reminders and checklists. all neatly divided into categories. search function and dates. why didnt i do this earlier oh my god.
op here. everybody adding passive aggressive comments like âjust use [other thing]â or âwow u dont know [other thing] exists get well soon â¤ď¸â owes me 5 dollars
everybody else especially adhd folks are very welcome and i hope u see something beautiful today
Big yep! I started doing this as a way to save and have easy access to reaction gifs LOL, but I realized itâs an incredibly easy way to store and transfer anything from device to device. As well as a generalized âbookmarkâ system where you can keep just about anything.
how can you tell the difference between social anxiety and rsd?
i dont know ive never had social anxietyÂ
sorry i cant help
if u know the notes are your platform
This is such a good question??? Theyâre both based on the social aspect, so it really is haha.
I had both. The social anxiety diminished as I grew up, but was very accentuated when I was younger.
For me, the main difference is that social anxiety (like all anxieties and phobias) is emphasized by expectation, while RSD by reaction.Â
I would be extremely anxious about going to the shop and interacting with the cashier, or going to the park and being seen by people. Severe social anxiety in class during school years, which meant I was terrified of everyone even if they had never given me a reason to be. I constantly expected something bad to happen.
The biggest thing... social anxiety can be âavoidedâ. I donât mean that itâs easy or anything, but you can just... withdraw and avoid. You can avoid going to the shop, or going to school. Itâs really unhealthy to do so, but you can.Â
RSD canât. RSD is a reaction, itâs being told âYou have funny earsâ and processing it as âyou have the ugliest ears on the planet and everyone will make fun of you hahahahahaâ. Itâs someone telling you âI love youâ every day, then accidentally skipping a day, and all you can think of is âthey hate me now, I mustâve done something wrongâ, proceeding to overthink on every single thing youâve done to deserve that.Â
For me, RSD comes out of nowhere. I can be incredibly happy, feeling good, and someone does something minor that I perceive as rejection. Maybe Iâm pestering someone excitedly and they tell me gruffly âPlease stop, I donât like thisâ and to me it feels like a direct attack on me, as though theyâre actually telling me âI donât like you, change yourself or I will leaveâ.
Whereas social anxiety is a direct result of something that is going to happen. Mom telling me weâre going to the shop. Finding out weâre going to have guests over. etc.

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[said while barely holding back tears] honestly this is fine and i am completely unaffected right now, currently, as we speak
I don't know if any of you had the same experience as me, but I tried therapy when I was a teenager living in an abusive household and thought it was a waste of time. Ultimately my biggest problems (dad) were beyond my control and no amount of coping would make them better. Now that I'm an adult with actual control over my life and don't live with my dad anymore therapy is MUCH more helpful.
If any of you had bad experiences with therapy when you were younger it may be worth it to try again now.
THE SAME GOES FOR MEDICATION!! I tried meds as a teenager and they were powerless to help much due to my living situation being horrible. I thought that meant medication didn't work for me. Now that I'm out of that situation and trying agajn I can really see a difference.
I can vouch for this.
Also important to know that the child/teenager body and brain are simply different. Thereâs a lot of things going on in there. Both medication and therapy is likely to be way different into adulthood, so if something failed during that time, consider giving it a try later on. This is especially because most children and teenagers have no control in their lives. Being asked to follow guidelines only further infringes on that. Itâs hard.
Living in a crappy environment will also easily thwart therapy coping skills simply because you only go to therapy so often... but you live in the crappy environment 24/7. Therapy is typically also isolated in a sense. Going to a very calm office and learning coping skills there, those skills will be much harder to access when the inherent instability of home hits again.Â