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@thecadaver
happy pride month

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sometimes artists worry if their art is actually capable of making the world a better place, or if its all just wasted effort. what you need to remember is: all art is evil, and the sole aspiration of the artist should be to maim as many onlookers as possible.
murderbot and arts first meeting is literally so funny. like imagine you meet a biblically accurate angel and instead of being all 'be not afraid' it says actually you SHOULD be afraid. and then when you are in fact afraid it goes oh shit oh fuck. not THAT afraid, sorry. wanna watch tv? and then you watch tv with it and it keeps telling you to pause it when its favourite characters are in danger so it can calm down. and then it asks to do surgery on your bones. Asshole Research Transport character of all time
op your tags are so important
hi, what the fuck was I going through the last time I used pinterest
send me all the information you have

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health isn't a virtue.
people still go around acting like they've done something good in order to be able bodied and healthy. that they worked for it, that it's due to their moral fibre or good upbringing or self control. they genuinely, on some level, believe that they are a good person solely based on the strength of their physical abilities. they will resist the fact that it is largely down to chance that they were able to maintain such health. whatever they think they've built from scratch, the building blocks were already handed to them. not because they're more worthy of it, just by luck. and they really think they're worth more based on that sheer luck. i've met disabled people worth a hundred of the healthiest ableds alive.
Posting pictures of myself more frequently would probably make me more popular. But I think it's really fun to post in a broadly "don't show the monster" manner.
i NEED people to realise foreshadowing is. in fact. a literary device. and not a Bad Thing. the audience picking up on your hints is a Good Thing. because. it makes the story and itās conclusion make sense. and some people will not see those but enjoy seeing them on a second read through. red herrings are one thing but if your novel consists of nothing but red herrings itās not a coherent story itās just a collection of paragraphs that donāt actually plausibly link to one another. you're not fighting with the audience you donāt look clever you look like you donāt know how basic fiction works. be vulnerable for once in your goddamn life and don't treat writing like a game to be won where the audience losing is a good thing.
Getting to the end of a story and going "THE CLUES WERE THERE THE WHOLE TIME!" is always joyous for me whether or not I picked up on the clues leading up
If I saw the clues and caught the hints then yes! I am clever and me and the author/creator/artist etc were in on it together the whole time!
If I didn't notice the clues or got fooled but can clearly see them in hindsight then "Ha! You won this time storyteller! I am delighted by this game we play!' and then I enjoy putting the pieces together afterwards and enjoying how clever it was. I feel like the creator respects me as an audience
If there is a "twist" that comes with 0 clues or foreshadowing at all I'm annoyed. I'm pissed off. I feel like I'm being condescended to and patronised. It's not clever or interesting and makes me annoyed I ended up caring about characters and plot points that ended up meaningless.
Because it's not that these stories don't have foreshadowing or plot clues. They just abandon it for a "surprising twist"
A story that pays off the clues is letting me into the fun and makes a participant in the story
A story that just gives me a "shock" but no pay off is telling me not to engage or get attached or care. So why would I watch?
OMG! THIS!
Random plot twists that don't connect to anything in the story are not clever. If we don't see it coming because the writer didn't provide any clues, they aren't clever and it's totally unsatisfying (and I will NEVER read this writer again). These clues need not be lit up in neon with a parade of elephants and showgirls. But they need to be present
I'm a writer and am rarely surprised. Often, if I am surprised it's because the writer was a dumbass and included a "twist" that makes no sense (and therefore isn't really a twist, it's just random bullshit). If a writer genuinely surprises me, without being an absolute dumbass, I am FUCKING DELIGHTED! I will tell everyone I know to read the book/see the movie/watch the show.
Foreshadowing is the reward for paying attention. It's the story letting you in on the secret like a co-conspirator because you're the clever little audience member who has been picking up on the clues the writer has been setting up.
It even makes watching/reading again more worthwhile because if you didn't notice the foreshadowing the first time you have the joy of being able to notice the things you missed!
My favourite read last year became an instant favourite because when it got to the big reveal I realised all the little things I had written off as Probably Just A Coincidence were in fact not at all a coincidence and had actually been stopping just short of outright revealing it the entire time. It was like I could *feel* all the pieces suddenly slotting into place
I sat there, went "how the fuck did I miss that????" and then almost immediately picked the book back up and read it again, and realised just how many layers there were to it that were so, so obvious when you knew what was happening, and it added so much more to the story to be able to read it again and know what was really going on
Crucially though, at no point does the author keep any of the information from you. It's all right there, you can start putting things together really early on in the book, but I was so swept up in the setting and the story that I never stopped to think about it
I love coming to my senses like you know what.. I shouldāve been meaner
i tend to avoid discourse because most of it is trite and pointless but just this once i feel like i need to state my opinion: i think everyone should bend to my dark and evil will

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Quick what are you doing RIGHT now (besides scrolling Tumblr)
donāt worry about the ādies iraeā notes in my leitmotif iām totally fine
We should abolish those stupid computer desk chairs and all pivot to full-on lounge chairs that are on wheels.
I replaced the busted legs on an armchair with four wheeled casters and now whenever I'm at the computer my posture is incredibly questionable but I am so, so comfy
girl who finally is going back to reading by finishing one book: now i'm going to read all the books in the world.
daughter (non-practicing)
sister (deadbeat)

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I think people would be less suicidal if they were allowed to talk about being suicidal without risk of being sent to the Torture Dungeon
Itās not a Discworld joke unless you read it, donāt parse it as a joke, and then carry on with your life for ten years until someone stops you to say something like āItās a pavlovian response because the dog ate a pavlovaā and you scream Terryās name with enough indignant rage you hope it rattles the pillars of the multiverse so wherever his soul is heāll hear it.
#i donāt think this is what pterry meant by āa manās not dead while his name is still spokenā
I absolutely think it is
I read Jingo for the first time when I was 13.
Iām 33 now, and I still discover a new joke every time I reread it.
Terry was a comedic genius
#shoutout to the one in Soul Music about the leopard that got thrown out of the circus because it couldn't hear the ringmaster#it was several months after my second or third time reading the book that I clocked it was a Deaf LeopardĀ (via @morkaischosen)
god DAMMIT
When I was informed that āVetinariā is a pun on āMediciā. That pun was so painful I couldnāt even see it.
...are you FUCKING KIDDING ME.
*starts thunderously knocking on the doors of heaven*
get out here Terry I just wanna talk
Twurpās Peerage made me throw a book (gently) at a wall.
In the UK, the book of the peerage is called Burkeās Peerage. Burke sounds like berk, which means a silly/annoying person. So Terry tookĀ ātwerpā, another word for a silly or annoying person, and replaced the e with u.Ā
The Book of Silly and Annoying People, based on the real thing with a pun on the name thrown in for good measure.
OMG I FUCKING *KNEW* VETINARI WAS A JOKE ON FUCKONG SOMETHING I JUST COULDNT GRASP IT. I THOUGHT IT WAS A REFERENCE TO WIND SOMEHOW
I am not a talented punster so I was today old when I realised about Vetinari.
guys it's fucking close to water
Latinclass ca. 9th grade: the text we had to translate contained the words trans means "on the other side of" or in german it can be translated to "über/ hinüber". Also silvas; silvanis means "the forest" or in german "der Wald".
Trans silvas very simply translated into german would be über den Wald
Trans silvas -> Transsilvanien -> Ćberwald
My latin teacher gave me a very weird look as I suddenly facepalmed myself and groaned quietly.
The Venturi and Selachii feud is what killed me when I got it.
The Venturi Effect is a scientific term referring to the acceleration of a liquid through a narrow tube (like a jet).
Selachii is a classification of sharks. (I discovered this when my stepson got really into sharks)
... fucking HELL Terry.
In Carpe Jugulum, Count Magpyr boasts of having helped write the Malleus Maleficarum, along with the Torquus Simiae Maleficarum, the Auriga Clavium Maleficarum, and in fact the entire Arca Instrumentorum.
The Malleus Maleficarum is a very real, very nasty and absolutely batshit insane book from late 15th-century Germany, basically laying out the procedure for catching, torturing, and executing witches. Its title translates to The Hammer of Witches. The other titles are Pratchett's inventions.
Malleus = "hammer" Torquus Simiae = "monkey wrench" Auriga Clavium = "bucket of nails" Arca Instrumentorum = "box of tools"
The one that made me want throw the book across the room in equal parts admiration and disgust (but I was reading an ebook on my phone and decided against it) was when you're first introduced to the small fey folk that are assumed to be gnomes, who have blue skin and red hair and are almost entirely men and you briefly wonder if it's going to be some elaborate play on the smurfs, only for the blue skin to be because they're covered in woad tattoos and they have Scottish accents and they're fucking pictsies