The Atheneum

AUTHOR: nevereatdirt CAST: Eridan/Dualscar RATING: Explicit WORD COUNT: 10265 ADDITIONAL TAGS: no SGRUB AU, age difference SUMMARY: Your name has long been forgotten by all but you, and the troll that you assume to be your young descendant is standing in front of you. He shakes, knowing that he's treading in dangerous waters, but you can't help but to take pity on him since he's somehow found his way into the ship you call your hive. Not only that, but he's in your private quarters. rec'd by 2olluxvanta2

AUTHOR: ThinkingCAPSLOCK CAST: Rose♠Vriska, Terezi/Vriska RATING: T WORD COUNT: 5271 ADDITIONAL TAGS: no SBURB AU, death, gore, created for ladystuck 2012 SUMMARY: Sometimes they could work together towards a common goal. The rest of the time Rose Lalonde went out for tea. EXCERPT: Your name is Vriska Serket, and you are going to rip so much hair off Rose Lalonde’s head that she is going to be bald for the rest of her miserable life. It’s not the worst thought you’ve had these past few days. Days? Fuck, she’s got you thinking in her dumb alien terms. You didn’t even notice. It doesn’t exactly convert well and you think the word itself is really ugly. But you’re stuck using it because of her. You’re extra pissed off. You look around. The alley is dark, but the air is loud with running, footsteps, shouts, and the presence of every form of law enforcement and military officer within the immediate area looking for you. Your good arm’s bleeding and your metal arm is falling apart, but otherwise everything’s good. Not bad for your second prison break. But you don’t exactly care about the prison break. Bashing heads is easy. Boring! You yawned a few times busting out, you admit. In fact you would have gotten out without a hitch if soooooooomeone hadn’t fallen down into the pit and let the staff know. Dead bodies were just so annoying like that. But none of it would have been a damn problem if that no good, scrawny, child sized shit that was Rose Lalonde. rec'd by sermna

AUTHOR: gaycatpenis CAST: John/Karkat, Sollux/Eridan; ensemble cast RATING: T WORD COUNT: 53079 ADDITIONAL TAGS: currently updating, college AU, band AU, humanstuck, way too many freeform tags, death, abuse, alcohol, self-harm, suicide attempt SUMMARY: The only good thing about Karkat Vantas' life is John Egbert. The only bad thing about Sollux Captor's life is Eridan Ampora. At least that's what everyone thinks. EXCERPT: You sigh, reaching out to brush his bangs off his face; you hate it when he leaves them hanging in front of his eyes like that, because he has the best eyes – they’re this sort of reddish brown colour, sort of like city skies at night. “I don’t even get why she feels the need to fucking sit next to me if she hates me so much, I mean...” He doesn’t even stop talking as he reaches up to swipe his hair back onto his face, just to piss you off. Your hand twitches to move them away again, but you curl it into a fist at your side, biting your lip and resisting the urge. If Karkat wanted to look like a sheepdog, he could do just that. “You need a haircut.” You can’t resist the urge. You interrupt his rant with a frown, lifting up his bangs and pinning them back with your hand, keeping them off his face. rec'd by 2olluxvanta2

rec’d by aproposfelicitations

AUTHOR: MLP_Mike CAST: John♥Vriska; Rose, Dave, Jade, Karkat RATING: M WORD COUNT: 318641 ADDITIONAL TAGS: currently updating, AU SUMMARY: Almost immediately after entering the game of SBURB, John Egbert is whisked away by Vriska Serket on a dangerous mission to kill Jack Noir. What follows is a twisting tale of sloppy rescue missions, brain washed brothers, alien prom rituals, romantic confusion, alternate dimensions, and time travel shenanigans. Needless to say, John has a hard time keeping it all straight in his head. EXCERPT: You are now John Egbert. You feel the wind tug and pull at the skin on your face and you resist the urge to squeeze your eyes shut behind your glasses. In the future you would come to appreciate the wind and its invisible power, but for the time being, it’s really a little more than irritating Maybe you’re being a little too harsh on the elements. Maybe the real reason for your subtle aggravation is really your situation as a whole. You are currently perched precariously on the back of a rocket car built for one, clinging somewhat desperately to the back of an alien chick’s t-shirt. Yes, that’s right: rocket cars and alien chicks. This is your life now. rec'd by 2olluxvanta2

rec’d by aproposfelicitations

AUTHOR: Semianonymity CAST: John/Rose/Dave/Jade RATING: G WORD COUNT: 3510 ADDITIONAL TAGS: created for jadefest SUMMARY: After the game, Jade and Rose and Dave and John end up in a new world, strange and painful after what they've been through, without their guardians but with each other, and eventually it will be enough. EXCERPT: Jade still couldn't keep normal hours. It was five in the morning, the sun was just rising, light beginning to filter through the window, and she'd crept out of her bed to the kitchen. She'd thought—hoped, maybe, maybe just assumed—that her sleep would be more normal, after the game, but she still took naps at odd hours, woke up when the time was right and fell asleep again when she needed it—and now the sun was up and shining! She couldn't sleep through that. Sunlight, yes, but she wasn't used to days this long, she'd lived too close to the equator. Her seasons had been different, marked by rain and humidity, not temperature and length of day. And she was jittery from the nightmares. The kitchen felt dark and crowded, even though it was big and empty—more than she knew what to do with, really! John liked to tease her about her cooking. But she made good bread, and it was... Easy, to open up all the windows—and then pull on a second sweater, shivering in the chill morning. Rose and John teased her about that! And then her and Dave could yell at them, because they were from warm places and they weren't used to freezing, and anyway, John, you whined all winter about the cold! But the light coming in helped. And she had bread started, so she pulled it out, dusted flour on the counter, began to knead—punching down the dough, shoulders working, rhythmic and steady. Less likely to cause a disturbance than shooting practice. Comforting and alive. rec'd by astralazuli

AUTHOR: placentalmammal CAST: Rose/Kanaya, Rose/Terezi; Dave, Karkat, Gamzee, WV, Feferi, John, Jade RATING: T WORD COUNT: 1245 ADDITIONAL TAGS: death, created for ladystuck blind SUMMARY: The diary is pink and girly with a lock and key, the sort you'd buy for your niece or younger sister. The entries are undated and unordered scattered throughout the book at random. There's a name written on the inside cover, Rose Lalonde, and this is what it says. EXCERPT: The meteor is deserted when John and Jade arrive. Everything is neat and orderly and covered with a thick layer of dust. There’s no sign of violence, no sign of life. It’s as though everyone up and left, locking the door and leaving the key under the mat. Eerie is the only word for it. They explore the wide halls and twisting staircases of the meteor base. There’s nothing there but dust and echoes, and every door leads to more halls, more stairs, more empty. There is one locked door, but they bypass it, intending to come back later for a more thorough investigation. The goal now is to find the others, find their friends. They end up in a library. The books are on the shelves and heaped in orderly piles. The only exception is a single book laying out on the large central table, a book with “My Diary” written on it in gold script. rec'd by 2olluxvanta2

AUTHOR: Elizabeth Culmer CAST: Jane, alpha Rose RATING: G WORD COUNT: 3124 ADDITIONAL TAGS: illustrated, letter writing, fluff EXCERPT: Dear Ms. Lalonde, My name is Jane and I met your daughter online last month. My Dad says it’s polite to let parents know who their children are associating with, so I’m writing to say hello and promise that I’m not secretly a serial killer. Roxy said I didn’t need to bother because you never check up on her, but I’ve never had a real friend before and I want to do it right. rec'd by longroadstonowhere

AUTHOR: ybrows CAST: Dave♥Karkat; Rose, Kanaya, WV RATING: M WORD COUNT: 9343 ADDITIONAL TAGS: incomplete, cooking lessons SUMMARY: “I want you to teach me,” he says, and for a split second there you thought he said ‘kiss me,’ and your brain was transported to a whole other planet, Land of Heat and Cockwork to be specific, until he re-iterates. “I want you to teach me… to cook.” EXCERPT: “Come on, man,” you say, busting out the guilt trip. Your puppy-dog eyes would be working a treat if, you know, he could actually see them. You wiggle the spoon around, making the airplane noises that Bro used to. They always work like a charm. “Neeeeyow,” you begin, “here comes the fucking jet plane, man. Mayday! Mayday! Hot diggity damn, this delicious array of herbs and spices with finely cooked chicken and a perfectly creamy, textured sauce better be consumed soon or shit will literally hit the fan, the fan will spontaneously combust due to the shock, blades will be flying everywhere and decapitate the citizens of can town- man down, they’ll shout! Man down in can town! But the radical citizens mishear them; being so used to my sick rhymes, they assume that their God has presented them with yet another opportunity to get the fuck down and party. They’re getting their groove on, gyrating, bopping, popping, pulling, turning, twisting like a group of headless chickens because, wait, that’s what they are. Their cruel God collects their dancing corpses and places them in a large bowl, spreading light seasoning and a perfectly stirred sauce over their bodies. The chicken has been flavoured. The circle of life is complete.” rec'd by superanthem

Nice! Thanks for all the recs, everyone. If you'd like to add any to the pile (so it doesnt stop from getting taller!), please feel free to submit links to us.

AUTHOR: aPlatonic CAST: Calliope/Roxy RATING: Explicit WORD COUNT: 2692 ADDITIONAL TAGS: post SBURB AU, slice of life, created for drone season 2014 SUMMARY: Calliope and Roxy make a life for themselves after the game. Also featuring Rose Lalonde's psychiatry and guest star Tamika Flynn. EXCERPT: You remember you were terrified to strip in front of her when you first started dating. You’ve since been reassured that this is perfectly normal, but you don’t see how it can be - you were sure that your body would only disappoint her, even if she wasn’t disgusted. Weren’t human relationships meant to be physical in nature? When she saw you, surely she’d realise that physical relationships would be out of the question. It’s basic biology. But eventually you worked up the courage to open yourself up to her judgement. To your shock, she didn’t react with dismay or revulsion, or even surprise. More of a… critical examination, scouring your body with her gaze, followed by a decision that this was something she could work with. Which she then set about proving to her satisfaction. Multiple times that night. Admittedly, you weren’t entirely prepared for her body. Rose’s book of lore didn’t provide anatomical diagrams, and you hadn’t been particularly inclined to spy on the humans to that degree. But there were more… lumps than you were expecting? And what on earth was that meant to be- -ah, that’s what it does. Luckily you had a patient and enthusiastic teacher, and it didn’t take long to get the hang of things. rec'd by likeasmilinggod

AUTHOR: #sunbreaksdown CAST: Rose/Kanaya/Vriska; John, Karkat RATING: T WORD COUNT: 16529 ADDITIONAL TAGS: complete, future AU SUMMARY: Five years after the game's over and done with, everyone's settled down on the newly recreated Earth. The universe itself seems to bend its will to make life easier for them, and there are absolutely no gaps to slip through. Everything's fine. EXCERPT: John turns eighteen. It's not the milestone it should be. Conquering thirteen and what came after it had been an accomplishment in and of itself, and he recalls that birthday intimately, with the sort of stark clarity he'd be better off without. The birthdays that inevitably followed only served to pull him further from the game's end, rather than push him on in his life, but John doesn't mind as much as he could. He's in one piece. They're all in one piece, somehow; he accepts that fact, and he doesn't question the truth of their reality, lest his wonderings cause it to come apart at the seams. As if a mere thought could destroy a universe. The planet they live on now is young, a warped mirror image of what both Earth and Alternia once were, and he knows that barely anyone realises just how fragile it really is. rec'd by 2olluxvanta2

AUTHOR: cosmoscorpse CAST: Rose/Kanaya, Dave/Jade; John, Eridan, Feferi, Aradia, Tavros, Sollux, Equius RATING: T WORD COUNT: 48029 ADDITIONAL TAGS: incomplete, steampunk AU, violence, politics, worldbuilding, pseudoscience, #incest, polyamory SUMMARY: In which terrible mistakes are made, often costing others their lives, there are politics, and the espionage that comes with them, a curse or two and far too much involvement of the old gods in modern affairs. Or: Dave Strider pays for something he didn't do, Rose Lalonde grieves, and Jade Harley sets out to correct her wrongdoings. Eventually. EXCERPT: You’re terrified. The waves move and you can hear them slapping against the side of the boat, but you can’t see them. You’re blindfolded and your breath stinks with fear. You’re sixteen, and you’re terrified. You lick your lips, try to get some moisture back into your parched mouth, and try to keep from throwing up. You speak. “I didn’t kill him,” you say, your voice cracking, and the boat shifts. The chains around your ankles clank against each other. The rope around your wrists burn. You swallow, your Adam’s apple bobs up and down. The thing is, with your sight removed, your other senses seem enhanced. You can hear every shifting of people around you, every rush of waves, and every creak of boat. You can identify each of the five people here to witness this by the way they smell. “I swear to God, I didn’t kill him, please, listen to me.” rec'd by astralazuli

AUTHOR: Bisabis, PeregrineWilliams CAST: Jade/Dave, John/Rose, Kanaya/Karkat, Jane/Jake; Jack Noir, Condesce, CD, Bro Strider, Dad, Sollux, Vriska, Eridan RATING: T WORD COUNT: 93836 ADDITIONAL TAGS: complete, Anastasia AU, death SUMMARY: Jade Harley is the heiress of the Crocker Corporation, and one fateful night, she contracts amnesia and loses all of her memories. She is found by some Trolls who raise her on a remote island. Ten years later, she reappears and is discovered by Dave Strider, who wants to make a profit, and John Egbert, her twin who wants to serve a dish of cold revenge on their "grandmother". Meanwhile, they are hunted across the country by the one who started it all: Jack Noir. EXCERPT: Jade was eight. Her birthday party took place in the grand ballroom of their home, and all of their friends and employees were invited. She was in her little white dress that went down to her knees with a black ribbon hugging her middle, and her new matching sneakers and short socks with a lace trim that rivaled the latest fashions among eight-year-olds. There was a procession and everything when she entered with her twin brother, John, who was also dressed in pure white, a pressed button-up shirt and white slacks with a black belt. One of Jade’s hands held John’s hand, by her mother’s request, and the other clutched a crayon-scribbled piece of paper. On it was a picture she drew a picture of her favorite grandma, not to mention her only grandma, and as soon as she spotted her sitting on her throne in the front, she let go of John and ran up to give it to her. “Gramma, I drew you!” she said, handing her the drawing. She was proud of it. It was a work of art. “It’s fintastic,” she said, smiled and patted Jade’s head. It was barely recognizable. Was it supposed to be her? No matter. Her attention was caught by John attempting to push over the cake table. He was dealt with by Jane before anything was destroyed. She had no tolerance for that behavior, but today was her favorite heiress’s special day so she overlooked it. rec'd by astralazuli

AUTHOR: lockandloadharley CAST: Jade/Dave, John/Rose; Jane, Jake, Roxy, Dirk RATING: M WORD COUNT: 42904 ADDITIONAL TAGS: currently updating, no SBURB AU, apocalypse, violence SUMMARY: The U.S. thought at first it was something that spread like H1N1, but something more severe brought in from another country--that it was something that could be fixed...They were so, so wrong. It became widely spread around the planet and you had to move out of Houston since the Corrupted wandered into town. That was thirty days ago. Thirty days and death is still new to you. EXCERPT: You awake to the feeling of something crawling up your shin. You slap at it and open your eyes. Everything is blurry. It’s bright out now and the smell of morning dew is surrounding the horribly unprotected campsite Dave had found the night before. Dave moves from beside you and slides your glasses onto your face. He smiles at you and you blink before smiling back, hiding your concern. He hasn’t slept again. You move to speak, but he cuts you off. He shakes his head once and nudges Rose. She wakes up quickly, but when she tries to shake John it takes longer. He is still used to sleeping in until eleven every morning. You doubt that anyone could ever do that again. Grief hits you hard in the chest at that thought. You push it away as fast as you can. Go away, go away, go away! rec'd by astralazuli