#davejade

new anon here - ☢️

Mmixed messages reminds me of davejade

Can you give me some feedback on the opening?

"Mom." A girl loudly whispers. "Mom. I think you should ask him out."

"Yiffany, he can hear you!" another voice replies in an equally loud whisper.

"So what. He's your type. And you're single." The girl with the gruff voice snaps back.

"Thats not the point Yiffy. You know how embarrassing it is when they turn me down," the girl's mother replies.

"Mom. You've got great tits, the face of a model, and you have an PhD. Only a loser would turn you down." The girl says confidently.

"Yiffy, I wish that were true. But most men are a little intimidated by my… you know…" the mother whispers back sheepishly.

"Mom. If a man can't handle seeing a teeny tiny girl cock, he's a loser." She says with a small chuckle.

"Yiffy! Not so loud. I don't need everyone in the park to know," The mom whispers frantically.

"Mom, relax. I doubt there’s anyone in the park that cares you’ve got a little something extra. It’s really not that big a deal. That girl in college, Vrissy, she's got dudes lining up to talk to her and she flaunts her schlong." The girl chuckles again.

Exasperated the mom says "that's not the point Yiffy. I find it uncomfortable sharing that info with people I don't know."

"Fine." Yiffy sighs. "But you better ask for his number. Unless you want your number one wingwoman, me, to do it."

A man with blond hair and shades, near the front of the queue for ice cream has a look of shock on his face. Were the mother and daughter duo talking about him, he ponders.

He pretends to check the little menu card stuck to the metal counter of the ice cream van. It gives him an excuse to glance sideways, trying to catch a glimpse of the woman behind without being too obvious. She's wearing a corduroy dress that reaches almost to her ankles, her bosom strains against the fabric, her dark hair flows past her shoulders in luscious waves, and her eyes sparkle like emeralds. She stands rigid, hands clasped in front of her, with a tense energy. Her daughter stands beside her, clearly trying to shrink her into action, her bouncing curls swaying as she taps her foot impatiently.

"Okay fine, I'll talk to him!" Jade finally hisses, shooting her daughter an exasperated look. The girl grins like she's just won the lottery, clapping her hands together before slinging her arm around her mother's shoulder and steering her forward. The man pretends to study the flavour list for another second, trying not to make it obvious that he’s been listening. But it's kinda hard when the daughter keeps ‘whispering’ at the top of her lungs.

"You promise, Mom?" Yiffany asks, voice dropping to a more normal volume but still buzzing with energy. "If you bail, I'll be heartbroken."

-42 koalas in a car 🐨