The Joust

KING JAMES, CAN YOU CHILL?

Local King Cannot Stop Promoting His Boyfriend

where’s the lush period drama about this series of events?

fun thing about king James, this guy was fairly public about his bf (more public than what was acceptable). He threw lots of extravagant parties with his man on his arm. It pissed off the church obviously so to get them off his back, he’s the one that ordered the third translation of the Bible from Hebrew to English (the King James Version aka the Authorized Version) so the Bible every hot blooded all American Christian reads today was literally just written so a very gay king could fuck his boyfriend in peace.

i’m body positive. i just got the results and it confirms i have a body

it’s kind of a disappointment to be honest, i was really hoping to be a ghost

due to personal reasons i will be passing away has been killing me for three days i can’t even say it without physically crying

every single Edgar Allen Poe poem is hilarious without context

“dude sleeping in my house has a weird eye so I kill him” “crow visits me and tells me to fuck off, in my own home” “I visit my old friend and everyone dies”

And lest we forget, “the literal Black Plague shows up and totally crashes my party”

“I killed my wife and my cat ratted me out to the cops.”

Im watching the parade and Julia is on the Sesame Street float and they actually outfitted her muppet with noise reduction headphones 😭😭😭😭😭

[id: tweet by sesame street @sesamestreet reading “we are thrilled to have our friend julia join us at the thanksgiving day parade this year! with the help of her friend rosita and the comfort of her noise-cancelling headphones, julia is ready for a fun and festive day in nyc! #MacysParade #HappyThanksgiving2018” followed by a picture of rosita and julia, who is wearing noise cancelling headphones and holding her stuffed rabbit. both of them are smiling. /end id]

The first person to say a wish won’t come true if you say it out loud probably wished for something really weird.

I’m writing my novel in fifth person, so every sentence starts with “I heard from this guy who told somebody...”

i may ‘have depression’ and ‘not function properly’ but guess what?

what?

Gay