ThatSoloTaco

i love poison omelette

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got some kick to it i tell you what

why am i dressed slutty you ask? to read classic literature alone in my room. mind your own business.

mary shelley writing about a monster rejected and abandoned by its creator and dedicating it to her own father i need to smoke a blunt with her i need to give her head

Nobody hates participation trophies like the type of old guy whose wife had to guilt-trip his kids with shit like "your dad is going to be sad if you refuse to pretend that he's a good father :(" to keep everything looking right.

You should really turn the sound on for this one

got chatting with a mum and daughter who live on my street because we had all stopped to pet the same cat and the wee girl goes "do you know [other local cat's name]" and I was like oh yeah that cat is my next door neighbour we're best friends! then the mum asked "do you know her human's name" and I was like lol why would I know that

I am making everyone remember normal goose

Thank you @glitterdustcyclops !

I am making everyone remember normal goose

Thank you @glitterdustcyclops !

I love that Rocky is a bland beige rock with too many limbs and no face! I love that he's so unmarketable and goes against the rules of character design principles!! Yet he is SO beloved!!! he sparks joy in millions!!!! In times where big corps try to replace art with the most boiled-down-edges-smoothened slop thats supposed to appeal to everyone and in doing so: appeals to no-one-- We have Rocky. I love you Rocky.

“why don’t they teleport back” because they’re not on the planet where everyone can teleport anymore. try to keep up dumbass

high comedy