I'm a writer and an artist

I, like literally anyone else who has tried committing to a bigger project or wip, have gotten another idea that I really want to work on. Now, as both a painter and a writer this isn't new to me at all, but it's still quite frustrating so I wanna post.

The reason it is so frustrating, is because I feel like it's a better idea that might be easier to write and have bigger demand, since I keep seeing people comment on how they want some random thing that I've decided to include in this story (like a lesbian Muslim who's very fascinated with mushrooms). It makes it so tempting to write, even if it requires a lot of research, hard work and a main plot line that may be a little wack, it would be a nice debut-book, you know?

The dilemma mostly revolves around the big question: do I stay with my wip because I committed and that's important to me, or do I go down this rabbit hole of cool things and scenarios I've wanted to write for quite some time now? And honestly, if you're in the same dilemma I can't help you answer that cause it has to be a soul-searched answer.

That said, I have been neglecting my wip out of fear of failure so starting on something new, that I may be better at, may be good for me - and help me practice for this possible harder story.

So, conclusion is I think it's time to change my bio.

With love from:

Today I'm feeling a little extra single, so I'm just gonna go through a list of different ways to show trust or intimacy between two characters (or real life ppl, I mean u never know).

Hands. Omg hands. Mostly hands touching each other. This can be a person's own hands touching themselves to establish a level of comfort in their body, or with someone else showing deeply intimate feelings. If it's their palms touching it could be them connecting their energies (like when they make their pairing official), if it's finger tips it could show a trust big enough for experimentation and so on. Hands communicate a lot, but especially intimacy so please use hands in your writing.

Eye-contact. It can be a show of a characters general kindness and confidence if they, instead of nodding at people when saying hi on the street, just keep eye contact and smile. Eye-contact can be used in an alluring and flirtatious way. You could write whole paragraphs of your MC trying to decipher another person's Eye-contact. It also upgrades every smutty chapter by 100% because it makes the characters confront each other and brings them back to reality. It makes a scene much more real. It can also be used to establish a characters confidence - where are they looking? Are they thinking abt where they are looking? What does this mean?

Communication. This may just be me longing for a relationship where I don't have to be the mature one, but communicating is so fucking sexy. Literally, communication is the best way to show trust between your characters, and it will probably influence your readers in a positive way if you sneak it in there.

Ears, for some reason. Once again, this is related to communication and listening to other people. If they notice another person's ears while they're talking, it could show-case listening. Also, noticing little things about people in general is rally intimate and can be used to share that, especially if it's not a very observant person.

Sharing physical things with emotional importance to the character. Fx. letting someone/a character borrow ur MC's favorite book or Lipgloss, and the character/person makes sure it gets back in good condition. This will show that they trust and/or care for the other person and respect their interests. As someone(a Taurus) who gets very possessive over my favorite things, this is definitely a huge one for me, so don't be fooled by how small/general it is.

If it's parental love/intimacy/trust, I find that arguments can be a good show for it as well. A safe environment is also one where you/a character is allowed to lash out when their feelings get too big to handle. It shows maturity and patience from both sides if an argument can happen, and both learn from it constructively.

Discussing art. Literally such a cute trope I love it deeply. Especially when the two characters disagree, and while it isn't mentioned or made too obvious, it's still clear that they obviously respect the other person's opinion. It is, however, a very nice playground for flirting, like with every other fight (enemies to lovers fans have a point).

Apologizing. Need I say more? No, but I will. Apologizing shows an ability to take accountability for ones actions, which is needed when showing trust and intimacy. Even if it's just a small "I'm sorry" after accidentally hitting someone on the nose. Don't overuse it, though, cause that might make the character seem insecure (which could be intentional, but just showing through apologizing gets boring and annoying over time).

Have them stand/lay next to each other unintentionally and without them noticing until a little late in the moment. Like if they get new seats in class, and one doesn't notice until 20 minutes into the first class. When they do notice, though, they might start panicking a little bc "omg they're r i g h t t h e r e" and then they make a move or smth (idk it's ur story).

Exchanging annotated books. It's like a peak in the other persons/characters brain. Besides, books are incredibly intimate and the favorites will typically be ones that a person relates to in some way, shape or form, making just that a simple peak at their emotions. Books about bookworms are adorable and I love it very much.

Okay that was a long list. Obviously don't overuse any of them, cause then they lose their power, but I do believe that this is a nice little connection. Feel free to add onto it, but I can't come up with anymore just in this moment.

I do hope this inspired you in any way to write any of these in to your wip, because I find them adorable.

I know, weird start but it’s getting harder to find new intros lol. 

Anyways, on topic, in contrast to my last post I have come up with my goal for my novel. I want my book to be the wlw book. I want it to have the same status in the wlw community that girl in red, Hayley Kiyoko and non-milk milk has. And yes, that is quite the goal, but the scariest part is that I don’t control wether that dream comes true. 

So, the title is sorta relevant ‘cause my demographic is literally The GaysTM and usually the women and enbys at that. AND it includes trauma, but not in the boring oh-no-my-mother’s-homophobic trauma ‘cause it’s set in the 1700′s c’mon, y’know? It’s in the narcissistic mother (who hit her like- once) kind of trauma, and the character - Catherina - has PTSD (but like, it’s not diagnosed ‘cause, again, 1700′s) which gives me a lot of research to do, of which I have started, dw, however I’d like some.. qualitative information on this so just, yk, DM me if you have a similar expirience and it doesn’t trigger you to describe your “flashbacks” ‘cause all I can do is imagine, and I really don’t wanna misrepresent this like most writers usually do. 

Anyways, we need a moral of the story here, which is funny ‘cause I haven’t found a moral of the story for my novel. And thus begs the question, “Does every story need a moral?” and personally I think it gives some sort of satisfaction when you’ve read it y’know, ‘cause then it wasn’t for nothing and you learned something. (I know what you’re thinking and yes, my teachers are quite fond of me, but on the other hand I get away with everything). Buuuut does my story need one? I think I’m gonna do the sensible thing with this issue, and procrastinate. Ahah, sometimes it works and you learn from the silence, don’t mf’ing @ me ok. No but for realzies, I haven’t written my first draft yet and I feel like that’s when I’ll get a better idea of the meaning of everything, so, postponing. 

This post is very messy, and I apoligize, however I just wanna circle back to the goal thing, ‘cause I do find it very important to set goals for ourselves. Mostly because it works for me, and it motivates me, and this particular goal doesn’t have a deadline and thus, doesn’t stress me (time and I have a complicated relationship, it’s best not to ask questions) so I guess that’s the moral of this story, set a goal. It’s ok if you don’t reach it, but set it and work for it. 

Success is a myth. 

Wow, starting off on a dark note huh? My apologies, it might not be a myth, cuz god it feels fucking amazing to achieve something you’ve worked so hard on, and no, I’m not talking abt my book. I won a huge science competition, thank you, and while it’s amazing to do great things, don’t work your ass off while doing it. I know, I know, that’s literally the exact opposite of what we’ve always been told, but listen; I won, yes, because I worked hard, but winning gave me so much else to deal with on top of that and I am crashing over here. So, maybe work 70% of your ass off, but save the last 30% for when you’ve already won, and have to do media bc oh my god I am so tired of none of my clothes being right for television, I am so done with being shamed for my room being messy on live fucking radio, and I’m tired of having to put on the same smile every time someone congratualtes me and YES I KNOW I SOUND LIKE A PRIVELIGED FUCKING ASSHOLE SAYING THIS but that doesn’t make it any less true, ok?

I guess I should’ve started this off with “hey.. Remember to take a break” but would you have listened? Would you have continued? Would you have taken a break? ‘Cause I know for sure, I wouldn’t if I saw that post. So, instead I am telling you right now, from my still dirty ass room, and with my lactose intolerant stomach filled with milk chocolate and cheese, take a rest. I know it might be frustrating to let go of your work, but please do it. Just go to your kitchen and make a cup of your favorite tea. 

Aaaand I just now realized that if you’re on tumblr and reading this, you’re probably not doing work?? So save this post for later, put it as your home screen, have google read it out loud as an alarm that remembers you to take a break and DON’T IGNORE IT! And also, unless you are currently taking a break, you should probably stop procrastinating, ‘cause it won’t make you feel any better anyways. (also breaks from social media are great too (spotify doesn’t count as a social media Hakuna Matata))

So, a conclusion: don’t set your goals to high, (also don’t set them too low, I believe in you), don’t kill yourself working(or any other way for that matter, I still believe in you), and take a fucking break dude, for realzies. Drink some tea. 

I have found myself in quite the dilemma. I need a short second plot, or a scene a chapter whatever just somthing to distract from the actual plot in my book. Wtf that is or should be, I have no idea about. 

Apart from that dilemma, I am terrified that my story sounds like a wattpad fanfic - no not the spicy kind. Due to the time placement, literally any time they kiss, or god forbid hold hands, I can’t help but think “Oh this would be scandalous even if they were heteros” because it would be. 

Ugh, writing is *hard* bro, I just wanna create a story every day dreaming wlw can live through. Sometimes I doubt my story because it is pure romance, there are no pirates, no fantasy, no action, just romance and drama. Unless you call that one sword-fighting scene action. But even then, that was an anger date used to reveal secrets, they just so happened to be sword-fighting until Cath broke down on the floor cuz Eve stepped on her trauma or whatever. 

You see, I wanna write a healthy relationship, I don’t wanna make it about coming out, not being accepted etc. I wanna make it about realizing what your own feelings are, and it just so happens to be queer and have current queer culture very integrated in it so the reader would be like “OMG WHAT” yk?

Fun fact: One of those things is how Eve dresses, since in the early 1700′s dresses had to be big, and it was a grandma thing to wear slimmer dresses. Well guess what Eve wears-

If you understand that, I love you. 

Anyways, the actual meaning of this is to et you know that it’s okay to doubt everyhting you’re doing. Just make sure to do it anyways. 

AND DON’T EDIT, REWRITE 

Writing in this format has me feeling like lady whistledown lmao.

Anyways, today I will be posting your daily dose of DO IT. Whatever just came to your mind - do it. I don’t give a damn that you’re scared of shaving your head or what your parents will say when they find out about the tattoo, DO IT. I double-dawg-dare you. DO.IT. Right now. If what you were thinking of was to stop procrastinating and actually doing smth? Yeah that was mine too, twinsies! still gotta do it though. 

I feel like we must do something else too, now that I have you here, so I’m gonna chit-chat about some writing (Oo~ nice!) I know, now let’s get to it:

When browsing through tumblr I see a lot of posts about “Things Not To Do If You Don’t Want Your Story To Seem Trashy” and istg #1 is ALWAYS describing your characters looks in a mirror. Now, I get it, if you have a very un-trained writing technique and a boring character - this will expose the thrashy-ness. YOU ARE ALLOWED TO DESCRIBE THEM IN MIRRORS but for gods sake include their inner monologue or something else that’s important, and don’t over-exaggerate. Describing your character in a mirror can be a great choice, especially if you’re writing about eating disorders or another kind of illness that shows phisically. Also things like tracing their [adverb] fingers over their skin can give a sorta subtle describtion of their bodytype through their fingers - big and chubby, long and boney, or even better, short and boney. Wow that last one had punch huh? Omg long and chubby (Every lesbians dream-) stOP-

Anyways, I hope you did the thing while reading this (get your mind outta the gutter) and had a good time. 

I am currently procrastinating on a 40 page report, currently on 33 pages, that is due this wednsday along with a video pitch and one page summary of everything, so I think a post is appropriate. 

Personally, I steal many things from tumblr. A couple of examples of this could be: “I think I can love you”, “Oh no it’s okay, it’s just a little different from our usual arguing” etc. so this is a reminder for you to steal everyhing you can get your hands on, however remember to spray a little of your own magic sparkle juice over it :) Don’t even worry about it, as a matter of fact I’d like to tell me one original storyline ever. Discliamer: you can’t. We have only ever told approximately 39 stories, all first told by greek mythology (I believe?). Yes that was also stolen from another tumblr post. Do not @ me ok. 

Anyways, I feel that this is an important message since we often tear ourselves down whenever we use something we’ve seen before, even if it’s the smaller things. I find this stupid tho, ‘cause from my expirience when you mention something-, write something very similar to- or reference something that the reader knows, they’ll expierience nostalgia. THAT’S GOOD. Tbh they’ll prolly love it, and if they don’t know it? No problem! they just think you’re a genius. Breathe babe, it’s really ok. 

Moral of the story steal and upcycle, readers will eat. it. up. if you do it right. Look at hp goddammit. 

Dear anyone who sees this, 

This is my first tumblr post, I’m a young writer and artist, and I’m working on my first novel. I’ve been working on this for about half a year now, next to school and other projects, and I’m here on tumblr to pick up tips and tricks, and to possibly build a small group of people who know about my book. 

To let you know what you’re getting into, I figure I should tell you about this book of mine. 

It’s a sapphic/wlw royal romance novel situated around the early 1700′s France. We follow the two queens Catherina and Evelynn, who have very different pasts, and rule small kingdoms, that happen to be situated very close to eachother. You could call it a second version of French history. These two queens struggle to determine the border of their kingdoms, and whilst doing this they find themselves a little distracted so to say. Battling the past, common beliefs and their own feelings they fall in love. 

To sum it all up it’s the royal cottagecore/darkacademia lovestory we all fantasize about, so if you’re into that, and if you wanna know more follow me! I’ll be posting my progress on here for all to see.