My cats just bullied me into cleaning up my desk because all the miscellany on it was obstructing their ability to frolic.

Like, I don’t mean they were tripping over things and I had to clean it up to stop them from knocking stuff onto the floor. I mean they’d perch on the only clear corner of the desk, look pointedly at the mess, look pointedly at me, meow very loudly, and repeat until I got the picture. They were very clear and direct.

I love your cats so much

One of the hazards of teaching your cats “show me” – i.e., lead me to whatever it is that’s bothering you – is that cats are bothered by a great many things.

careful bro you’re making this sparring scene kinda homoerotic

bro watch out you kinda sound like you’re flirting when we argue

broooo i’m serious you’re making our esteemed rivalry look so gay oh my god

that scene in the raven king where ronan makes the confession to adam about cabeswater and adam is like, "omg, that's why the trees' latin grammar is so terrible" is so fucking funny, like, "ok i might have just found out that i'm in love with what is basically a demigod, but i'm also not going to miss this opportunity to roast him"

I swear we are all talking about andreil dying in the most dramatic ways like Neil getting killed by his father and other mafia stuff but the real death of them is gonna be that they fall off that goddamnn roof some day

this feature also has names for 2016, 2015, the early 2000s, and every 1900s decade going all the way back to the 1890s!

they finished the book soaring away on magic hoverboards while carrying shiny swords with ridiculous names and ya’ll have the nerve to be SURPRISED that the second book has a ridiculous name?

fuck relationships except whatever that redhead and cigarette have