#valida

Le cose capitano spesso proprio a caso,

To jedynie kochamy, co możemy w każdej chwili utracić.

I don’t quite know when I became this person who needed validation, maybe I have been like this for years and just realising it, but I don’t remember turning into this needy person, I don’t even remember what it felt like to not need validation. I have become this person who seeks approval from strangers just to feel like I exist, just to feel like I matter even if just a little bit. Seeking approval from your family sometimes is justifiable, especially when you are feeling low or when you are going through a bad time, but even with them I don't remember ever getting that approval, that 'yes you are good enough' or 'yes you did good'. I don’t remember ever not seeking approval, validation, trying to be good enough, trying to be better, trying and trying. And eventually love started to feel like a task. Hugs felt forced. Words felt heavy, heart felt numb and soul just felt tired. And suddenly I felt the need to hear from someone that seeking validation all the time is alright even though it isn't.