#technopathy

“Ummm.” Tony had his lips pressed tightly together, fighting back a smile, but Rhodey could see it curling at the corners of his mouth anyway. “Everything okay there, bud?”

Rhodey didn’t even try to pretend he wasn’t upset, just sighed heavily. “Betsy finally kicked it.”

“Betsy?” Tony repeated with an arched brow. “Sounds like somebody Captain America would have dated.” But he dropped his bag in the doorway, making his way over to the television in question. “Want me to take a look?” 

Rhodey gave a half-hearted, forlorn shrug, and Tony didn’t even have the grace to pretend he wasn’t laughing at him as he pulled the TV out, poking at the back of it. 

“Come on baby,” he purred, manipulating the wires. “Tell me what’s going on, yeah?” He talked away to the TV as he worked, pausing for breaks like it was a conversation, and Rhodey quirked his head as he watched him. There was something odd about the way Tony was working, something he couldn’t quite figure out. Rhodey had a tendency to talk out loud while he worked too, but this was different, like Tony was actually listening to a response. And then, after a few moments, Tony gave out a “Ha! There you are,” fiddled with something, and Betsy sparked to life again. 

“Holy shit,” Rhodey said, because he’d been working on the TV set for hours, and he hadn’t the idea of writing her off lightly. “How did you do that?” 

Tony shrugged, but he looked pleased as he rocked back onto his feet, wiping at a spot of grease on the side of his thumb. “I just listened to her, you know?” 

Rhodey just arched an eyebrow, because no, he didn’t really know. “Uh… Sure?” 

Tony just grinned wide and grabbed his bag to dump in his room. “Pizza tonight?” 

***

That might have been it, except that Rhodey kept noticing it after that. He’d always thought Tony talked to the coffeemaker like that because he loved coffee so much, but then the coffee always somehow tasted ninety times better when Tony made it. And he seemed to have uncanny luck when it came to traffic lights. Like in a way that Rhodey was pretty sure actually defied the laws of probability. And somehow their highly temperamental oven never seemed to burn the frozen pizzas that Tony put in, even though he could barely cook to save his life, and Rhodey -- who actually could cook, thank you very much -- always managed to burn his pizzas to a crisp. 

And then there was the ROTC Christmas party. The ROTC Christmas party always turned into a drunk fest, and Rhodey was no exception to the rule. He’d been looking forward to it since his second week of classes. Tony had been finishing up his final project for one of his classes anyway, so he’d promised to pick Rhodey up after, saving him from having to drunkenly stumble his way home. But he’d been late, and Rhodey had been waiting outside for nearly twenty minutes, distracted by the lightly falling snow, before Tony rolled up in his car. 

“Sorry, sorry,” Tony called, leaving the car running as he jumped out of the driver’s seat and hurried over to help Rhodey through the snow. “I couldn’t find my goddamn keys.” 

“I’m not so drunk I can’t walk,” Rhodey protested, unable to help the way his words all rolled together. “You don’t have to help me.” Tony’s hand on his arm was warm and comforting though, and he made no effort to pull it away. 

Tony just grinned at him and then reached up, brushing off the snow that had gathered on Rhodey’s bare head. “Why didn’t you wait inside, dumbass?” he asked.

Rhodey shrugged as Tony helped him into the car, pushing his head down so he wouldn’t smack it into the doorframe. “Got distracted by the snowflakes.” The fond smile that Tony gave him in return made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside and he snuggled into the cushy leather, watching Tony through the windshield as he hurried back around to the driver’s side and climbed in after him. 

“Here,” Tony said, turning the heat up until it was full blast. “You’re gonna freeze to death.” 

“I’m fine,” Rhodey protested. “I’m not even cold.” 

“You’re frozen,” Tony told him, grabbing his hands and rubbing them between his own hot ones. “You’re just too drunk to realize it.” 

Rhodey was pretty sure that wasn’t true, but the heat did feel nice, making him drowsy and lazy as Tony headed back toward the apartment. His eyes were getting heavy, now that the party was over, and he fell asleep not long after. 

But when he thought about it later, he could have sworn that there hadn’t been any keys in the ignition when his eyes had closed. 

Still, he probably could have written all of that off (maybe Tony had panicked when he couldn’t find his keys and hotwired his own car. That was totally something he would do) until the incident with the music. 

Rhodey had had a very long day, and felt like his head was splitting apart with a headache. All he had wanted was to go home and sleep for the next twenty-four hours, but he’d had to stop by Tony’s lab and tell him something that had seemed important at the time. Of course when he’d walked in there was music playing at an excruciatingly loud decibel, and no sign of Tony among all the bits of machinery. It was too loud for him to even hear himself think, let alone for Tony to hear if he called his name, and not in the mood to play hide and go seek, he’d headed over to the top-of-the-line stereo system and hit the pause button. 

The music kept playing

“What the fuck,” Rhodey grumbled, blinking down at it as he tried to will his brain to work. He hit the button again, wondering if he’d hit the wrong one or something, headache making him stupid, but still the music continued to blare out through the speakers. 

Of course, Tony was constantly taking things apart and putting them back together when he was trying to problem solve. He’d probably rewired it so that off was on and vice versa. Rhodey was too tired to try and figure out what button went where, so he just reached around back and pulled the cord right out of the socket on the wall. 

And the music kept playing. 

“What the fuck?” he shrieked, suddenly wide awake as he jumped back with the cord still in his hand. He pulled a little too hard, and the entire system fell to the floor with a loud crash, but the music still didn’t stop. 

And then: “Rhodey?” 

Rhodey just barely heard Tony’s voice over all the noise, but he whirled around to see Tony standing there with his arms full of spare parts, eyes wide and distressed. Abruptly the music cut off, the room going suddenly, eerily quiet. Rhodey blinked back at Tony, down at the stereo and the cord still in his hand, and then back at Tony. 

“Was this you?” 

“Listen,” Tony nearly tripped over his own feet as he stumbled over to the counter to set the things in his arms down, moving over to Rhodey with his hands held up in a placating motion, like he was terrified that Rhodey was going to run away in fear. “Rhodey, I can explain, I swear. It’s not what it looks like.” 

“Can you control electronics with your mind?” 

Tony’s face fell, and he winced. “Okay, maybe it is kinda what it looks like,” he muttered, staring down at his feet, and for the life of him Rhodey couldn’t figure out why he looked so dejected. 

“Holy shit, Tones,” he breathed, looking around the room with a new appreciation for everything Tony had in there. He grabbed Tony by the forearms. “This is awesome.” 

Tony’s head shot back up, staring at Rhodey with a startled expression. “Awesome?” he repeated, incredulously. The hint of a nervous smile twitched at his lips, like he didn’t want to get his hopes up. “You really think so?” 

Rhodey’s eyes narrowed slightly; he’d known Tony long enough to be all too familiar with the symptoms of Howard Stark’s A+ parenting. “Tony, let me say it again. You can control electronics with your mind. This is the coolest thing I’ve ever heard of! In the first place, I'm pretty sure this qualifies you as a bona fide superhero. And even as far as superpowers go, this is waaaay up there in coolness factor. You could have something lame like cheese manipulation--”

“Cheese manipulation?” Tony repeated, looking confused.  

“But let me say it again. You can control electronics with your mind.”

Tony snorted, but he was grinning now, shy and pleased. “I don’t know about superhero,” he protested. “But thanks. I guess. Although I feel like I should point out, it’s not like I actually did anything.” 

Rhodey ignored that. “How long has this been going on?” he asked instead, finally letting go of Tony’s arms. “Have you always known you could do this? I can’t believe you didn’t tell me sooner.” 

“I mean…” Tony shrugged, rubbed awkwardly at the back of his neck. “Yeah? But when I was a kid I just thought it was normal. It wasn’t like I was around a whole lot of people, I just figured everyone could turn the lights on by thinking about it. And then when I was like five, Howard had a whole entire day where he actually remembered he was actually my dad, and he was showing me something in his lab, and I was so excited to be working with him that my dumb ass said something about being able to hear the electronics and, well… You know Howard.” He shrugged a little, seeming to shrink in on himself. “He looked at me like I was nuts -- like really nuts -- and made me leave, and then later that night I couldn’t sleep and I snuck out of bed to find Jarvis and I heard him whispering to Mom about psychiatrists and mental hospitals and sending me away. Obviously that didn’t happen, and when I didn’t bring it up again they forgot about it, but I guess after that I was scared to ever mention it to anyone.” 

Rhodey blanched. He’d seen the pictures of Tony as a little kid, heard the stories from Jarvis. He couldn’t imagine even considering sending away that sweet little thing to a mental hospital for something as innocuous as telling his father he could ‘hear’ the television. Not for the first time, Rhodey wondered what in the actual fuck was wrong with Howard Stark. He managed a smile for Tony though. 

“Guess I’m just special then, huh?” 

Tony huffed and rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t help his little smile. “Yeah, I guess so.” 

Rhodey huffed right back at him. “Jesus Christ, quit looking so pathetic, you’re breaking my heart.” He wrapped his arms around Tony’s back, smiling to himself at the way Tony immediately melted into it, wrapping his arms around Rhodey’s waist in turn and leaning into his chest, despite the minimal height difference between them. “Listen, Tones. I know your dad’s got money, but that doesn’t mean he’s not a fucking moron. Howard sucks. This is literally the coolest thing to ever happen to me, and it’s not even happening to me.” 

There was a little giggle against his chest before Tony pulled back again. “Yeah?” he asked, smiling but still looking awkward. He let go of Rhodey’s waist and gave a little shrug. “I don’t know, I guess maybe I also kind of always felt like I’m cheating?” 

“Cheating?” Rhodey stared blankly back at him. “I don’t get it.” 

Tony shrugged again, somehow looking even more awkward. “Well you know. People give me all this credit for being smart, and good with tech and--,” 

“Nope,” Rhodey hollered as he figured out exactly where Tony was going with this. “Let’s just shut that shit down right now. You're using your natural talents to the best of your abilities. Would you consider…” 

He trailed off, trying to think of a good example, and Tony arched an eyebrow at him. 

“Captain America having the ‘ability’ to take on a tank cheating?” he offered with a wry grin. “Yeah, I absolutely would.” 

“Nope,” Rhodey said again. “Not the same at all.” 

“You’re the one who literally just compared me to a superhero,” Tony grumbled, but his smile looked a little more genuine now. 

“Still, not the same,” Rhodey insisted. “You were born with this, it’s not something you injected into your eyeballs.” 

“I don’t think…” Tony started, but stopped at the look on Rhodey’s face. 

“You’re not cheating any more than... Stephen Hawking is cheating,” Rhodey decided on finally. “He uses his brain to the best of its ability, and so do you. Besides, lotsa people have natural talent without a clue what to do with it. You’ve got both, so… Not a cheater.” 

“That’s a terrible conclusion. Not a bit of proof. It’s a hypothesis at best.” Tony was grinning though, that shy little smile that he got when he didn’t want Rhodey to know exactly how pleased he was. 

“I’m serious, Tones,” Rhodey insisted, because the best way to get Tony to really relax was to bully him into it. “This? Is cool. Think about all the things we can do with this!” 

“‘We?’” Tony repeated, voice dry. 

Rhodey ignored him. “You can fix my car for me... I’m never going to have to change a lightbulb again...” 

“You’re definitely still going to have to do that, that’s not how electricity works.” 

“You can get revenge on that asshole at the coffee shop who always makes my coffee wrong. Swear he does it on purpose,” Rhodey continued as if he hadn’t spoken. “Hey! Can you do that thing in the movies, when you make money shoot out of the ATM?” 

Tony snorted, but he was fully beaming now, concerns apparently forgotten. “This all sounds like a whole lot of me doing the work while you get the benefit. What’s in it for me?” 

“Tony, baby.” Rhodey threw his arm over Tony’s shoulder and gave him his most obnoxious wink. “That’s what friends are for.” 

He waggled his eyebrows at him and headed for the door, busting up laughing when all he got was an indignant, “We’re boyfriends, asshole,” from behind him.