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Why are books about Heydrich so fucking expensive??
I need research material for a new fic... πΏ I just want to write morally questionable fanfiction, not take out a loan. (yes, I'm already plotting a new project before finishing the current one)
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The one problem with having read multiple Wellington biographies and Waterloo books is genuinely not being able to remember which book has which facts in it. I spent far too long getting distracted by fun bits in Longford while not finding the anecdote I wanted, only to realize the key bit was in Hibbert instead.
How you think you look when explaining your dissertation:
Vs.
The Reality:
To P or not to P(hD)
Ok, so I'm actually looking for a story about a supposed ghost ship that was up to no good off St Helena in the late 19th century and what do I find ? this : There is a fishing boat rowed out of a cave near Egg Island by six headless oarsmen. No context, no time, no legend, nothing but that. What the heck am I supposed to do with that ? Myths are sometimes terrible to trace.
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Me: Okay, this is a stupid little silly fic. It does not need to be research intensive. I just need to know which race tracks were in New York in 1883.
Also Me: I need to know the exact length of the racing season in the 1800s, which races were run at the Jerome Park race track after October 22nd that year, if any, who won which races, what the weather was like...
(Just as a side note, if anyone else needs NY weather by year...THAT you can find pretty easily!)
okay this is gonna sorely lack context but it's mostly just screaming into the void anyway so w/e
BRUH I CANNOT WITH MY OLD LAB
Literally ran this damn experiment up through my last day there. Didn't actually get to take the week off in between old and new jobs because I was desperately trying to get my data and notebook together (everything was a mess because I was doing a post doc's job on a shitty tech salary with zero PI support and the bench load was just too much). Been busting my butt to get all my experiments graphed and written up at the expense of my literal current job that I love for their stupid progress report since before The Colonizer's Holiday and I just cannot write up this last mouse study to save my life.
I'm not gonna get any credit or thanks for my work, but I can bet I'll be getting complaints about handing off this last summary the week the progress report is due. Like...I know my PI was gonna send it in at the last minute anyway because that's his MO. And my write up is sO iMpOrTaNt because they only have my mouse model as an actual *thing* to show for the lab work this year- no papers or presentations or ANYTHING ELSE.
Plus, like, this last study is a straight mess as-is. I had to troubleshoot stuff on the fly because the literature had precisely nothing on the kind of study this was and neither PI is actually competent at the bench. Also, as much as this was too much work for one person, doing this study right would have involved a lot more time points. It's a cool concept and this does prove it can be done (and has been somewhat refined from a technical perspective) and the data suggest interesting things, but it absolutely would have to be re-done at least 3x more and that's never happening...fuckers are abandoning the project once the grant is up...after we (read: me and the other tech with lots of advice from the technical director of one of the cores) got shit actually working in the span of 1.5 years.
I'm tired. And out of fucks. And also frustrated.
I hate emailing physicians/research teams... so much stress over the perfect wording, and then when I don't know how to answer, I just delay answering, and next thing I know days have passed and they probably think I'm rude as hell.
