#relationship fights

ginger writing

But they also break fast, like a giant furious storm that leaves them heaving and breathless and exhausted, and instinctively seeking out the comfort of the other person. They fight hard but forgive quickly, but not just by repressing it all. They talk it out quietly in the exhausted aftermath, usually huddled together–everything nasty and held back and hidden already flung about and revealed and unable to be forgotten again, which lets them figure out how to do better, eventually falling back on apologies and physical contact and alternatively explosive and deeply emotional makeup sex. Ginny never fails to tell him she loves him after a fight, and it calms Harry more than anything else, this reconfirmation of what is between them, of what she feels for him. He isn’t as free and easy with his words, but never leaves her doubting how important and vital she is to him.

- words.by.a.boy

Has anyone else been afraid to get in fights with their partner ?

OUR BAD DAYS. 💔 Relationships aren't perfect, there will always be bad days. And we cannot exempt ours from the rest. Many of our friends would say, "Since you two got back, seems that you're always in good terms." Or, "You two are so sweet, do you even fight?" And others would even dare to say, "You two are perfect." - thank you for all those kind words and appreciation, but we'd like to let you know, we're human. We're not perfect, we fight and sometimes would hurt each others feelings over petty things. But here's what something I can share whenever we're on our bad days. Petty fights. -We had LOTS of this. Actually, most of the time, the cause of our fights are over petty things. Thing about petty fights is that, this kind of fight can be caught and resolved easily. Once we started arguing over something petty, one will always initiate to shut up and let the other talk. That person is me. Once you start arguing with RJ and he really thinks that he's on point (which sometimes, he's not! That's basically why we would start arguing.), he won't stop raising his opinions and won't even let you talk. So, I shut up. When I say shut up, I would literally treat him like he's not around and no one's talking. During my silence, I act like I'm not listening, but the truth is, I'm hearing every words he say and would mentally put questions in bullet forms in every statement he said and in every point he raise. You'll know when he's done because he'll start making lambing and would start talking to you like there's nothing happened. He would ALWAYS start it this way, *he'll hold my waist or hands or would look at me in the eye* "Baby, ba't tahimik kana?" Little did he know that, him asking me that is my cue to start my side of argument. I just don't normally talk to him, I sometimes give him my resting bitch face and would start asking him all the questions I've come up while in time out. And ALWAYS, his answers to my questions will only be , "Oo na lage baby. Oo na. Mali na ako. Oh, tama kana." Or, "Sssshhh... oh na babe, oh na." And my favorite of all, "Opo. Di nata mag away. Ssshh na.." 😂 Krystel - 1 RJ - 0 Late replies. -I, particualrly, hate late replies. Who wouldn't hate it by the way?! This can fall into "petty fights" but I'd like to explain something about this. Okay. Let me get this straight, RJ replies fast. Really. It's just that sometimes, I'm impatient. Especially whenever we're txting and sometimes he'd say, "baby, brb. I'll have to do this blah blah.." First 10mins I'd totally be fine but whenever it would take more than that, I start to evolve into something inhuman. 😂 So, thing about me, I'd flood him short and kind messages. He'd reply to that and would say, "baby, dali nlg ni. Hapit nako mahuman." So, okay. Sure, I'll wait. But there are really times that the network itself isn't cooperating - delay messages. I'd literally cry my madness out. I am the most impatient person when it comes to waiting for his replies. Really. I'd cry! I'd cry because I'm upset regardless of what is the reason of the delay. May it be in the network or his replies are really late because he's still busy, I'd cry. Me, being impatient, would really lead me to anger and would let it all out on him even if it's not his fault - it's the network's fault. How will you know that it's the network? The messages will come flooding in your inbox with different message-received-time. So, RJ, becoming the victim here, would rather chat than txting me. Because in chat, you'll see if the other person has read your messages or you'll know if they're already typing. So right now, this petty reason has been minimized because we come up to something that can somehow resolve it. Again, RJ hates calling and I'm not a fan of telebabad too. Krystel - 1 RJ - 1 Serious arguments. -This one sounds the toughest and hardest to resolve. But for me, this is the best kind of fight. Why? Because we end up learning something and would really tend to not do it again. As I can remember, since late last year, we only had two. And we get through it, together. This kind of fight would really draw us stronger. This kind of fight is the one thing we look back and would say, "Diba tapos na tayo dito, please di na nato to balikan. Lisod to and we don't want to get through it again. We've learned." Yes, this is the toughest. Our first one took us 1 day not talking nor txting/chatting each other. And the latest one took us more than 12hrs. You'd probably say, "Grabeh. 1 day lang/ 12hrs lang serious fight na agad." Yes, that's a very difficult fight for the both of us. Because whenever we fight, we always make sure that we can sleep and go to work or go through our day without heavy feelings. We make sure that we'll make up for the sake of each other's feelings. That's the reason why 1 day of not talking to each other is already hard. It's 1 day wasted, 1 day running around with heavy heart, 1 day not knowing how each other's day went and it's 1 day of not talking where in fact you should be saying I love you's. But again, we hardly have this. And hopefully won't encounter as much. Krystel - 2 RJ - 2 Yep, we both have points for this because we both work our way out from that kind of fight. Bottomline, one should really take a step back. No one's winning if you'll continue arguing with hard heads. You'd rather lose an argument than lose the love of your life. ❤️ Petty things are petty things, it's cute and that's essential. Just know when to put an end into it. You don't want to waste a minute over some crap, do you? Be patient. Impatience won't bring you anywhere. You'll end up disappointing yourself because you overthink the things that upsets you. Learn from the things that once caught you on fire. Remember, only YOU did put the flames out and the burns aren't bad at all. Always learn from the things you once stumbled upon, that what makes who you are today. Fights won't define how incompatible you are to your partner but it rather defines how well you go along to surpass it. You're always a team, one wins then you two wins. No one lose. PS: Red days don't count on this. Red days aren't bad days. And, RJ always, ALWAYS takes a step back for me. 😂 I love you, Mister ko. ❤️😘

I always thought stuff like this was psychological nonsense poor people say because they can't afford a jet ski. But the past week has changed me so much that I've matured more in it than I could all throughout my life. The past week taught me a lesson; never let go a person who has taught you to love and show you what it is to feel like when you've been loved, even if there's a spat sort it out, because the sooner you do so, the better it is. If you would've met me two weeks back I would've told you my life sucks because I don't have a jet ski. But last week when I was almost alone, feeling as if I'd lost the ability to ever love anybody again I was pulled back into believing how to love again by the same person. And no, this isn't a cheesy love note or an article under The Speaking Tree. This is just one human who's realised you can't measure happiness by jet skis. So let's just cut to the chase, the "small thing" that happened was not a kiss, it wasn't when we cuddled, it wasn't when we asked each other out by going down on our knees. It wasn't a cliched scene by a Karan Johar movie. So when we talked it out, we had lunch just 10 minutes after it; and we sat right next to each other and she decided to serve me she picked up the bowl and served me to my plate. I don't think anybody noticed but I flushed pink at that very moment- it was a beautiful moment, I held my tears back and recalled the first time she'd served me and the first time we'd hugged two years back on my birthday. How we started being so happy with each other and how after that we had one fight after another. After every fight we go through, people ask me if I'm happy in this relationship- the thing is I don't see how fights belittle a relationship. Aren't fights basic a human need? You put three plates in a bag and shake it even they make noise. Why won't two humans when rattled by the world? So every time you go through a tough time don't look at pictures, rediscover memories that's all you need.

Me: You know what? I'm going out with the dog. Dress and eat.