#phanfluff

Looking at it however, not even Daniel knew what he wanted. Did he really want to be in a relationship with a man like Phil, someone who traveled and killed monsters? Did Daniel want to put his entire life at risk for a simple man, someone who couldn't even properly take care of him, someone who didn't make proper money, nor have a proper job. He couldn't properly protect him, but honestly he could protect Daniel more than anyone, knew things others don't, things other men couldn't protect Daniel from, especially if whatever killed his dad or anything at all what gonna come after him.  

Was Phil someone Daniel even wanted to be interested in? He was the kinda man his father would say run away from. someone so full of sin God couldn't even turn his head to look at him, his name having a permanent place on the list of Hell.  And wait just one second, why was Daniel even considering this, Phil wasn't interested in him, and he wasn't interested in Phil. That was final enough for Dan. He didn't need a relationship, his father had just died, not that Phil could even give him a proper relationship.

He had thought about his father as little as possible, trying to mask his feelings of sadness underneath everything, making himself busy with Phil and the new journey ahead of him so he wouldn't have to worry about how it would be when he had to stop and actually think.

Why had his life had to change so much, why had his father had to die, and why did this happen to him specifically. How cruel was it that a god who claimed to love him so much would make him suffer through this.

Daniel felt his mood drop, he felt his lip tremble, and he felt water stinging his eyes. His father had been a good man, he truly was, or at least that's what Daniel had believed. Things like this just happened to Daniel, there had been a time when he had believed it was because he way gay. Where he had believed everything has happened to him because God was punishing him, and sometimes his father had even agreed with him.

Quickly wiping his cheek he put his bags on the bed. He heard footsteps behind him and he turned around to find Phil staring at him, curiosity in his eyes.

“You okay?” he asked, clearly hesitant, he wasn't one for emotions something he didn't need to tell Dan for him to understand.

All Dan could do was nod, he wasn't going to to cry to Phil, he wasn't going to do this. He was eighteen, he could handle this, after all, clearly his father hadn't been all that amazing so why was he so upset? He could see the doubt in Phil’s eyes, so all that he could do was turn his back to the man, as his shoulders hunched. He could feel his breathing become heavier, his eyes were watering again, tears racing down his cheeks.

Maybe it was the fact he was crying, maybe Phil Lester actually did have a heart, because soon enough he felt arms wrap around him, turning him around and hugging him. Dan could only sob harder as Phil squeezed him. Dan let himself bury his face into Phil’s jacket. Daniel just didn't know how to stop crying, why had this happened to him, why did Phil even have to come to the town, his father should be alive, his mother should be alive, he should be straight and in college right now, becoming the lawyer his father wanted him to be. Instead here he was in the arms of a man he could no longer deny the fact he was attracted to.

Eventually the crying had to stop, and Dan was content with just being held, breathing in the scent of Phil and letting himself sniffle and let everything out and go. Maybe he wasn't healed, maybe this was the first of many breakdowns, but this was a start, and he knew he could do this.

Soon enough he felt the arms start to pull from his body, and as pathetic as it sounds, he let a small whine slip out. He wondered why Phil had to let go so soon, which in turn made him wonder why he even ared, why did he convince himself he wasn't attracted to Phil, only to turn around and prove the facts to his own face?

Phil let out a chuckle, and Dan was only upset when he couldn't feel the vibrations against him like he could have a moment ago. Phil was face to face with Daniel now, and even though Dan hated this fact, he couldn't help notice how amazing those eyes were, close to his own. He hated this stupid cheesy feeling he got near this man, how was it fair someone could jump into your life so suddenly and make him feel something, even knowing he'd never have a chance, even if Phil was gay, clearly he wasn't interested, showing the way he was able to stop making out with him so easily, push him away and then joke about it. Clearly Daniel just wasn't Phil’s type, if Phil even had a type.

He watched the way Phil’s head fell into a tilt, and Dan wanted to die with how cute he looked. How could a single human being make him feel like this? He felt his head tilt, and the sigh that fell from Phil’s lips made him want everything so much more, so much that he almost forgot what he knew would happen if he kissed Phil right here in this present time. He would enjoy himself before Phil ultimately left him crying like the last time. Phil Lester just wasn't one to be held down and Dan knew he couldn't put himself in that position again.

“So what's the worst thing you've ever hunted?”he asked, looking down at Phil's lips for only a millisecond before he was back to staring into those blue eyes, blue eyes that were crinkled at the edges form the smile he was giving Daniel. Dan might be ashamed to admit he felt his stomach swoop from that one smile.

“Hmmm let me think.” Phil said, glancing down before saying “Probably this nest of vampires in Portali, killed over fifteen of the teenage girls in the town, and then kept their bodies. Only way i knew it was vampires is because of the fact that one girl survived. Freaked out she told the police but of course they said she was just scared and couldn't think straight. There were at least seven of those freaks just preying on the girls. It was awful.” He finished.

Daniel shivered at the thought. So many lives lost, yet this man in front of him saved so many people, even though he didn't understand Phil, he was extremely grateful he did what he did, saving people from things cops couldn't ever dream of. He was grateful that he had even saved him from what he had never believed had existed.

“Wait, do all of the families know what you do? He asked, curiously tilting his head. Phil chuckled, he seemed to find it hilarious Daniel was interested in this kind of thing, but i mean what did he expect when this was his life for now? The only thing he could do was deal with this, it was his only choice, he wanted to know about the supernatural elements and how you deal with them. Was there a god? Apparently since castiel existed, if so, did Lucifer also exist? The questions just kept popping up.

“Most families don't know anything unless they see the creatures themselves, which i try to prevent. I don't trust people not to go about trying to do what us hunters do without proper training.” Phil said, he looked away for a second, before finding “Not knowing has really messed a lot of people up, I've watched couples together twenty years divorce because of it, but it's better separated then dead i guess. It just makes you feel bad, but that's what life is. Other hunters think its funny, call them a bunch of pussy’s, but I've watched mothers hold their own kids as they die, hell i know a woman named Jody whose son came back from the dead, poor woman couldn't handle anything cause she loved him so much, but that thing ate her husband, so in the end she lost the most two important dudes in her life. Sam and Dean took care of that one, i was helping others. You haven't seen hurt until you've watched these things. Ain't nobody at fault for crying over what I’ve seen.”

Dan was in awe, staring at Phil for a moment, before he asked “Is she okay?”

Phil stayed silent for a minute, before he nodded. “She's good now, helps us out every once in awhile. She's a real great woman, i just wish we all could have helped more than we did. She should have never seen that. This job destroys people, but more people are gonna hurt if we ignore it and go about our merry ways.” he said.

“Couldn't they just, I don't know leave? Quit?” Daniel asked, kind of shocked at the angry look Phil gave him.

“You think they, or should i say we haven't tried? Things out there have fucking brains, and they will hunt you if you stop hunting them. Many friends of mine have been killed because they wanted a family, settled down, had a kid or two, and the one day wakes up dead, wife’s freaking out, kids crying and she's calling me because she doesn't understand.You can't leave this job, it's dangerous to be in it, worse if you get out. At Least hunting you have the equipment, stay in practice to know when somethings up.” He said. Dan could tell his breathing had gotten a bit heavier, so before it could escalate into a fight over Dan’s lack of knowledge in the supernatural department he placed his hand on Phil’s lightly. “I'm sorry about your friends.” he said sincerely.

Maybe it wasn't a lot, but Phil nodded, his expression softening. On the desk, Phil’s phone rang, causing them both to jump. Phil groaned and got up, answering it and saying “Yes, ma’am” a few times, before he placed the phone down and grabbed his jacket.

“Just got a call from the police department. They have a new body so i’m gonna go ahead and go ahead and get up there, try and exam and stuff. Will you be okay?” He asked.

Phil shut his eyes again and grabbed a blanket that Dan had left on the sofa, draping it over himself to block out more light. Despite two layers covering his eyes, the pounding headache remained, the feeling that someone was squeezing his temples, that his brain was going to explode out of his head. The blanket helped with making it darker, but it also smelt like Dan, which calmed him a little.

Phil lay down on the sofa, hoping that by some miracle, being horizontal might be the cure. As he lay there, full of pain and misery, he started to drift in and out of consciousness. Maybe he could sleep; maybe that would fix it.

Phil fell into a fitful sleep, being asleep for a short spell, then waking up because his head still hurt. It became a vicious cycle: falling asleep, hoping for a little relief, then waking up to find that relief hadn’t come.

“Phil?” a voice interrupted his sleep, speaking softly.

“Mmmph?” Phil replied, groaning, but managing to make it sound like a question.

“Are you okay?” Dan asked, the sofa cushion by Phil’s feet moving under Dan’s weight as he sat down.

“Headache,” Phil mumbled, finding that even talking was making it worse.

Phil felt Dan shuffle up the sofa a little, then peel back the blanket from over his face. Phil groaned as the light hit his eyelids, moving his hands to cover his eyes.

“Okay, I’ll turn the lights off,” Dan said softly, getting up, padding across the room and clicking a couple of switches.

“Lights are off,” Dan said, his voice still hurting Phil’s head from across the room, “I’ll be back; I’m going to get you some paracetamol.”

Phil heard Dan’s footsteps disappear down the stairs, then a minute later, they came back up. Dan’s footsteps moved away, probably towards their upstairs kitchen area. Phil’s thoughts were confirmed when he heard a cupboard shut, then the tap running.

“Phil,” Dan said, as he made his way across the room towards him, “If you could sit up to take your tablets?”

Phil groaned, then with a bit of effort, managed to push himself up into a sitting position, feeling his stomach turn and his head pound a little more. Dan sat down on the sofa next to Phil, handing him two paracetamol for one hand, and a mug of water for the other. Phil swallowed the tablets, swiftly following them with a big glug of water.

Phil tried to hand the mug of water back to Dan, but was met with a chuckle and Dan pushing the water back into his hand, “Drink the rest, Phil. You need it.”

A little miserably, Phil lifted the mug of water back to his lips, and slowly sipped on it. Meanwhile, Dan moved a hand to rest on Phil’s back, sensing he needed a little comfort. Dan kept quiet, knowing that in this state, Phil wouldn’t appreciate even his quietest voice.

They sat in a dark silence for nearly twenty minutes, Dan hoping that would be long enough for the painkillers to kick in. Phil had leaned into Dan’s side, using Dan’s shoulder as a place to rest his aching head.

When the paracetamol had knocked the edge off of Phil’s headache, Dan gave him a bit of help to get downstairs to bed. With every step, Phil felt a little bit worse, so having Dan’s arms around his waist was a comfort, something to stop him collapsing on the stairs.

At the bottom of the stairs, they turned into the bedroom and Dan let Phil sink into their bed. Phil barely had the energy to reach for the duvet, so Dan reached down and pulled it up to Phil’s shoulders, letting him take it the rest of the way. Phil pulled the duvet up a bit further, bunching it up at the top and nuzzling his face into it. There was something about the smell of your duvet which was just so comforting. It wouldn’t magically make him feel better, but it was warm and comfortable and smelled just right, which was exactly what he needed.

The bed sunk slightly as Dan climbed on at the other side, then settled himself next to Phil.

“Try and get some sleep baby,” Dan murmured softly, running his hand over Phil’s duvet-shrouded side “I’ve got ibuprofen and more water here, so if you need them, just say, okay. I’m not going anywhere.”

Dan, after a moment’s decision, laid down next to Phil, curling his body around him. If he wasn’t going to leave Phil, he might as well cuddle with him.

Phil let out a sigh as Dan snuggled up behind him. His head still hurt a bit, but he felt he could sleep now. Their bed was warm and soft; it smelled of sleep and comfort, and Dan was here to look after him. He would be okay.

The moment the bell rang, Dan pushed himself out of his desk chair and zigzagged around the hoards of students beginning to crowd the hallway. The sound of lockers opening and closing made him move faster, squeezing through any available space he could find to get to his locker. He had to get there so he could ‘accidently bump into’ the new kid again. Despite school being in session for a handful of weeks now, Dan had only met the boy yesterday when he got to his locker and dropped a stack of papers he was holding. While most people pretended not to see so they wouldn’t have to help, the new kid bent down on his knees and helped Dan gather his notes.

“Oh, you don’t have to—,” Dan began, bringing his head up and meeting the most beautiful colored eyes he’d ever seen.

“No worries, it’s not a problem,” New Guy replied pushing himself off the floor. “Cool locker.”

Dan turned and looked at his locker door where he had hung a MCR poster he got from a magazine and the little white board his mum insisted he put on his locker so friends could leave notes which was as clean as the day she bought it.

“Yeah?” Dan replied, though it sounded more like a question.

“Yeah.”

New Guy smiled at Dan one more time before heading down the hallway. He didn’t mean to, but Dan watched New Guy, noticing that his locker wasn’t too far from his, but far enough that it would be weird for him to go down that way when the front entrance was in the opposite direction. Dan knew the only casual way he could talk to the him again would be to get to his locker before Hazel Valley’s newest student walked past. Nearly out of breath, Dan arrived at his locker and opened it, pretending to look busy while taking quick glances through a sea of students for a head of black hair.

“Hey!” Dan said too excitedly upon finding who he was looking for.

“Oh, hi,” the boy giggled.

“I—um, remember yesterday when my papers fell? I don’t think I said thank you,” Dan forced out trying his best to act natural. “So, thanks. For that.”

“You’re welcome,” the new kid smiled making Dan’s heart skip a beat. “I don’t think I introduced myself yesterday. I’m Phil.”

“I’m Dan,” he paused for a moment. “How are you liking HV?”

“It’s definitely bigger than my old school, but I’m getting used to it. I’m having more trouble figuring out what people do over the weekends here,” Phil admitted with a small laugh. “My parents keep pushing me to go out and do something but I have no idea where anything is.”

“I usually just stay at home and play video games, but every once in a while, someone will throw a party with insane amounts of alcohol which is always fun. I’m terrible to drink with in public though,” Dan laughed recalling a moment from the party right before school began where he woke up snuggling with a bottle of Malibu Rum in the middle of the host’s backyard.

“Well that’s definitely something I won’t be telling my parents I’ll be doing. If I ever get invited to a party I mean. Being the new kid in secondary school really sucks. Everyone already has their group of friends and aren’t really looking to make new ones.”

“I definitely can relate. Most of my friends from primary school didn’t come here so I had to figure something out. I know some people that are pretty great, but I kind of consider them acquaintances.”

“I wish making friends now was as easy as it was back in pre-school. You just tell a total stranger that they’re your friend and that’s it,” Phil half smiled. “Anyways, it was really nice talking to you, Dan. I hope I see you around.”

Dan smiled feeling his stomach churn. He found that talking to Phil was easy, so why can’t it be like pre-school? He knew he had to say something, but couldn’t find the right words, so instead he said, “I hope so too,” and watched Phil walk away towards his own locker.

Dan threw some books in his bag and threw it over his shoulder getting ready to leave when an idea popped into his head. He grabbed a pen from his pocket, sucked in a deep breath, and walked halfway down the hall to Phil’s locker before his brain could talk him out of it.

“Let’s make it like pre-school. I don’t know you, but I would love to meet you. I think that we should be friends,” Dan said quickly, grabbing Phil’s hand and scribbled his cell phone number on his skin.

Phil looked from his hand to Dan, his face breaking into a huge smile.

***

It had been a few months since that day; snow had fallen and covered the grass in a thick blanket of white only to be trampled by hundreds of boots from students running out, excited to begin winter break. People threw snow balls at each other as they exited the building while others looked absolutely miserable bundled up in layers of coats, hats, and scarves.

“Want to come over?” Phil asked Dan as they walked out of school together.

“Sure, just let me drop my stuff off at home.”

Since that first day, both boys had walked with each other to and from school after finding out Phil only lived a few blocks away from Dan. While they didn’t share classes, they made up for lost time during the day on their walks home which usually turned into Phil coming inside Dan’s house ‘just for a drink of water’ but somehow ended up in hours spent playing video games.

“Oh, mum and dad are leaving today to pick up my brother from uni so they won’t be back until Sunday. She demanded that I get proof from your mum that it’s okay you’re over without parental supervision,” Phil giggled, his cheeks turning red. “She’s weird about leaving her baby home alone for a few days so if you want to spend a couple nights, she would love you forever.”

Dan laughed knowing his mum wouldn’t mind him staying at Phil’s at all. In fact, all he would have to do is tell her he’d be spending a few nights there and call once or twice to let her know he’s still alive and she would be okay with that. Still, Dan promised to get it in writing for Mrs. Lester so that would be one less thing she would have to worry about.

After dropping his things off, getting his mum’s note, and packing an overnight bag, Dan and Phil made their way back to Phil’s house. Phil rang his mum and read Mrs. Howell’s note of approval and promised to stay out of trouble until they came back.

“Mum says thanks for spending the night with me,” Phil reported after hanging up the phone. “I swear, she treats me like I’m 6 sometimes.”

“All mums are like that,” Dan replied. “I’m sure mine would do the same to my brother if I were away at school. Perks of being the oldest.”

Phil rolled his eyes playfully at Dan trying to mask his face into one of disgust, though his smile gave him away. Making his way to the fridge, Phil moved some bottles around before pulling out a bottle of vodka and two shot glasses.

“Wanna play drunk Mario Kart?”

“Where did you get that?!” Dan asked in disbelief. “I never took you for a vodka drinker.”

“I asked Martyn to buy me something strong before he went back to school in the fall. Mum and dad think the bottle is his, and all it took was a month of chores, plus the cost of the bottle,” Phil smiled triumphantly. “We’re on break and that calls for celebration!”

“But vodka?” Dan asked, scrunching up his nose. “Why not rum? Or at least a flavored vodka?”

“Yeah, not my first choice either, but it has a high alcohol content so we’ll be feeling great after a few shots.”

“Fine, I’ll do shots with you, but I’m grabbing orange juice for a chaser.”

Grabbing the bottle of orange juice, both boys hopped up the stairs into Phil’s room. Despite knowing no one else was home, Dan still closed the door behind them.

*

“You’re fugging terrible at this,” Phil slurred 6 shots in.

“Shuddup,” Dan giggled crashing into a wall. “I’m still waaay better than you.”

“Nuh uh.”

“Yeah huh.”

“You’re dumb,” Phil laughed pushing Dan over who just fell to the floor and lay there rather than getting up.

“The room is spinning. Lay here with me, look.”

Phil plopped down on his back next to Dan and closed his eyes taking in Dan’s familiar scent mixed with alcohol.

“Boop, wake up,” Dan said in a high pitched voice poking Phil’s nose.

“I’m gonna bite your finger off,” Phil playfully threatened opening his eyes just enough to see Dan’s.

“Noooo you’re not cause it’s not a worm,” Dan burst out laughing. “Like when you were 8.”

“That was one time! Cause Martyn made me,” Phil pouted trying not to smile knowing he was failing anyways.

“That’s okay,” Dan finally replied wiping a fake tear from his eye once he calmed down. “You’re pretty. Your eyes are pretty. I like them. They’re like…I dunno, like pools or something. I could go swimming in them.”

“I like you, Dan,” Phil said suddenly, trying not to slur his words.

“I like you too,” Dan replied drunkenly.

“No, like…really. How like, you know how Ms. Mooney looks at Mrs. Bey but they can’t cause she’s married? Like that kind of like,” Phil explained.

“Oh,” Dan nodded trying to shake off his drunken haze.

“I’ve been scared to tell you because I like that you’re my friend and I didn’t wanna mess things up but now I’m drunk and I’m saying everything in my head.”

“I like you too. From the first day with the papers. That’s why I talked to you,” Dan admitted feeling his cheeks flush, though he wasn’t sure if it was from the alcohol or finally admitting his feelings to Phil.

“Your face is red,” Phil laughed, poking his tongue out between his teeth.

“So is yours,” Dan rebutted trying to cover his face. “Are you still gonna like me when we’re sober?”

“Duh,” Phil said rolling his eyes. “I wish I told you I liked you sooner. Like when I was sober. Why didn’t you tell me you liked me?”

“Not telling,” Dan slurred shaking his head.

“Come ooon,” Phil begged. “You gotta tell me now!”

“Never ever, ever,” Dan snorted making a sloppy ‘lock and key’ motion with his hand.

“Not never ever, ever! Tell me!” Phil whined slowly pushing himself up so that he could climb on top of Dan. “I’m gonna tickle you.”

“You can’t mess with me, I’m drunk,” Dan laughed making absolutely no effort to get out from under Phil as he began wiggling his fingers over Dan’s stomach.

“You gotta!” Phil replied laughing along with Dan while doing his best not to fall over.

“Okay, okay!” Dan shrieked with laughter when Phil got to Dan’s neck making him arch his back up. “I’ll tell, I’ll tell! Just not the neck!”

Phil sat on Dan pulling his hands away from his neck and rested them on his chest to steady himself.

“I didn’t say because I thought you were so good. Like so pretty and nice. Just so stupidly perfect. And you would never like me back and I know I would miss you if you didn’t wanna be friends because I messed up and said the secret,” Dan stammered trying his best to make sense.

“You’re silly,” Phil giggled. “I would never stop being your friend.”

Both boys fell into comfortable silence for a few seconds before Phil spoke again.

“I can feel your heart beating.”

“That’s a good thing, I’m not dead,” Dan replied thinking it sounded much funnier in his head as he put one of his hands over Phil’s. “Can I kiss you?”

“Only if I can kiss you,” Phil smiled leaning down.

Due to his drunken state, Phil fell faster than intended and instead of kissing Dan, their noses bashed together making them erupt in a new wave of laughter as Phil rolled onto his bedroom floor.

“That was the worst first kiss attempt ever,” Phil breathed through giggles.

“Try again,” Dan smiled now that they were both lying on the floor on their sides.

“I did try, it’s your turn,” Phil challenged grabbing Dan’s hand in his.

“Let’s just lay here for a minute and get not drunk,” Dan decided. “Then I’m gonna kiss you so good.”

“So good,” Phil repeated as Dan rested his free hand on Phil’s cheek.

***

“Ugh, I hate this song!” Dan whined turning off the car radio. “Why is every song the same?”

Since starting their last year of school, Phil’s mum decided to let Phil drive the family car as long as Dan was with him to make sure he wasn’t being reckless. Both boys’ parents didn’t know about their relationship, not because they were afraid of their reaction, but because they knew they would never be left alone together if they told their parents they were more than friends.

“Hey, my car, my rules,” Phil joked turning the radio back on as he turned into Hazel Valley’s car park. “If you hate every song on the radio, why don’t you just write one yourself? Put those forgotten piano lessons to good use.”

“Playing a piece of music that’s already been written and writing the music myself are two very different things,” Dan giggled. “And it would probably sound like everything that’s already written because I have no creativity whatsoever.”

“You know that’s not true,” Phil replied as he pulled into an empty spot. “I heard if you write about something you love, it’ll just fall right out.”

“I can’t write lyrics! And I’m not writing a song about something I love because that ‘something’ is you and that’s what every song on the radio is about,” Dan smiled resting his hand over Phil’s.

“Every song on the radio is not about me,” Phil joked missing the point on purpose leaning in for a kiss from his boyfriend. “It could be romantic.”

“It definitely wouldn’t be,” Dan laughed. “It would be like, ‘hey I don’t know you, but I think that we should be friends for a few months then get really drunk when we’re 16 and make out.’”

“We didn’t make out. We didn’t even kiss! I fell on your face and almost broke both our noses,” Phil laughed loudly recalling his fondest memory with Dan.

“So romantic,” Dan smirked peppering a few more kisses on Phil’s face then neck.

“Don’t start this here,” Phil sighed wishing he could indulge. “We’ll get written up for being late again.”

“So?”

“So, they’ll call our parents and they’ll put the pieces together.”

“You really are a mood killer, you know that?” Dan pouted sitting back in the passenger seat. “But you’re right. Maybe during lunch we can come back in here and make out?”

“I can’t believe I ever thought there would be a romantic bone in your body Dan Howell,” Phil laughed hopping out of the car.

That's when he heard it, probably the fifth time this week

Dan sighed and closed his laptop and put it on the night stand and made his way towards their kitchen

"Oh, I don't want a lot for Christmas, this is all I'm asking for", echoed through their house, "I just wanna see my baby, yeaaaahhh", Phil danced a little as he stirred the pancake batter and continued singing with Mariah Carey as her voice came through his speaker, "Standing right outside my door"

"Phil", Dan whined when he arrived, it was the start of October and it wasn’t even December and his boyfriend still sang Christmas songs

"Oh I just want you for my own", Phil started putting some of the pancake batter on a pan, "For my own", Phil sang and looked at Dan, "Baby"

"Phil!", Dan yelled through the speaker, it was starting to get annoying at this point

"More than you could ever know", Phil flipped the pancake successfully, "Make my wish come true"

Dan knew that no matter what he did or tried, Phil would continue, he even tried kissing Phil when he was singing and it didn't even work and all Phil did was shove him away and continued singing. So Dan should know that it's no use and he should just let Phil sing but he was not gonna give up, no, Dan would never give up

"All I want for Christmas is", Phil took the now finished pancake onto a clean disk, put another small amount of pancake batter onto the pan and turned around when he heard Dan call his name again for the third time but Phil shushed him and giggled when he saw the face on Dan when he did that, "You, baby"

And Phil kissed him as the chorus were singing the end line of the song and Dan quickly kissed back, maybe he should listen to Dan and stop singing Christmas songs when it wasn't even the month of Christmas but he couldn't just kill his Christmas spirit

When the chorus ended, Phil pulled away from the kiss and looked at Dan, but soon he smelled a burning smell and quickly looked at his pancake batter that was on the pan and it was black and burned, so he quickly took the pan and put the burned pancake on the sink and put the pan back and put another small amount of pancake batter on the pan

"That was close", Phil turned away as he said that but got a quick kiss as a response

Per usual, it was almost 3am when Dan decided to head to bed after some late night Internet binging. However, walking into the room, the last thing he expected to see was Phil sitting up as he had gone ahead to bed a few hours prior. Continuing to walk into the room, Dan could see that Phil was just staring off into space and hadn’t even noticed him yet. He walked the rest of the way to the bed and slowly sat down near the end so he didn’t frighten the other.  Upon feeling the bed shift, Phil turned towards Dan and smiled a little. “Decided to join me after all?” he asked.

Dan’s brows drew together with concern as he looked back at Phil “it’s been 2 hours since you said you were going to bed. Have you been zoned out this whole time?” he questioned.

He watched as Phil’s eyebrows shot up and he glanced at the time display on his phone beside him. “I guess so. I was just thinking and I guess I got a little side tracked” he replied sheepishly.

Dan climbed into the bed beside him and pulled Phil towards his chest. Dan asked, “What has you thinking at 3am instead of sleeping?”

Snuggling closer Phil sighed, “My hair. I know its just hair but I’m worried about cutting it tomorrow. What if people don’t like it and they stop watching me? Am I really still AmazingPhil without the fringe?”

Dan lightly pushed Phil back far enough he could see his face and ran a hand through Phil’s hair, leaving his fringe pushed back. “I know it’s scary to change things but a lot of the time the change is a good thing. Remember how much you had to reassure me when I first stopped straightening my hair?” he asked. Phil shook his head yes, so Dan continued, “I was so afraid of how people would react because I had spent so long hating it, but in the end you convinced me it would be ok and I think it turned out for the better. At the very least my hair is definitely healthier” Dan chuckled. He pulled Phil back to his chest and the two snuggled down under the duvet. “Plus look at it this way, I’ve seen you with a quiff for years and I still think you’re pretty fit” Dan laughed.

Phil snorted as he let out a breath. “Yeah I guess you’re right. You embraced your hobbit-ness and everyone still likes you. Maybe being fringeless won’t be so bad” Phil said followed by a yawn.

Dan pressed a kiss to Phil’s forehead as he said “Phil with a quiff is going to be just as amazing as Phil with a fringe. If you really don’t like it, you can always change it again.”

Was it unfair, petty, and totally unreasonable? Absolutely. In all honesty, Phil would probably be voted nicest guy in the school, if anyone were to take a poll. Was he was a bit weird? Most certainly.  However, it was a completely harmless weird. It was quirky and odd like that store on the edge of town that dealt solely in the manufacture and sale of cat-themed gnomes. If she were to be straight with herself, she would admit that Phil had never knowingly or unknowingly harmed, damaged or even seriously upset herself or anyone she remotely knew, simply because that wasn’t the type of person Phil was. No, her dislike of Phil wasn’t his fault, and he had no idea it was even happening. Her dislike boiled down to one thing and one thing only.

“Louise! You’ll never guess what Phil did today!” Dan gushed, collapsing in the seat next to her.

Louise didn’t bother to look up from her compact where she was very carefully reapplying her lip gloss. She knew Dan was flushed lightly with a wide, dopey smile and that his eyes shone as if every star was compacted down into glitter that was dumped into hot chocolate. He always looked like that when Phil was brought up. Which was a lot. “I’m guessing from your normal reports that he was walking down the hall and breathing.”

“No,” Dan scowled and wadded a bit of paper into a tiny ball and flicked it at her, offering a sheepish grin after it landed in her makeup. “I actually talked with him a bit today.”

“Dan, we’ve discussed this before. Saying ‘Hi, Phil!’ and then hiding your face and running away before he can respond doesn’t count as talking to him.”

“Someone’s in a mood,” Dan pouted. “And I’ll have you know this was a totally real and legit conversation we had. Some dick head knocked into me on the way out here and Phil saw and helped me pick all my stuff up and everything. He even gave me his hand to help me stand up!”

Louise cocked a brow. “Really? Honestly, Dan I almost didn’t think you had it in you,” she said, ignoring his squawks of protest. “What all did you boys talk about?”

“He saw my piano book and asked if I played,” Dan said dreamily, the look on his face making it more than apparent that he was reliving the moment in perfect clarity again and again until it was ingrained in his memory. “And so I told him yeah, but I was awful and then I thought he was going to just leave but he walked with me almost the whole way here and he saw me in the play last year, Louise! He saw me and remembered me and told me I did a good job! Oh my god, it was probably the best moment of my life.”

Louise rolled her eyes, but smiled good naturedly, more than pleased over how happy her friend was. However, there was one thing that always bugged her about the whole situation. “Dan, darling, why Phil of all people? I mean he’s nice and all, and, sure, he’s not awful to look at, but he’s just so strange. Saying you could do better is probably the understatement of the year.”

Dan looked at her, glaring at her as if she’d just spat in his mother’s face and told her that her cooking was a disgrace (which she hadn’t) and he was personally offended (which he probably was). “Okay, first of all,” he started and Louise took a deep breath, already regretting her words and preparing for the sermon that was soon to follow. “Phil Lester is an unusual beauty so rare and perfect and we don’t deserve him. Second, he’s got an absolutely brilliant mind and we should all count ourselves lucky to hear anything that brain decides to gift us with. Third-”

“Mr. Howell,” Mrs. Bronwell interrupted from the front of the room, “as much as I’m sure we’d all love to hear you expound on the virtues of Mr. Lester, I, personally, get paid to teach you math, and I’d quite like to do so at this moment. If that’s not an imposition on you, of course.”

Dan blushed bright red all the way from his collar bones (and possibly farther, who knew) to the very tips of his ears. “Sorry, Mrs.,” he said, sinking down a bit more in his chair. “I’m done.”

“Oh, I highly doubt that,” Louise scoffed, quite unintentionally. There were a few scattered titters around the room and Dan gave Louise a long, hard, stare. The whole school probably knew about Dan’s crush on Phil just from him talking loudly and passionately about how wonderful the other boy was at any chance he got, so it’s not like there was any new gossip being delivered so he didn’t really feel the need to be properly embarrassed. But, the sting of betrayal was still there and he was sure to let her know he felt about it.

“Thank you for your contribution, Miss Pentland,” Mrs, Bronwell smiled, “but we really must get on with our lesson. Now, today we’re studying logarithms - James, don’t you roll your eyes at me. Yes, I saw you just fine.”

Now that the lesson had begun and he was finally free of all judgement, Dan let himself drift off quite happily into his thoughts, where his daydreams once again found themselves centered upon the subject of Phil Lester. How kind his smile was when he was offering him help. How he seemed genuinely interested as Dan flushed and fumbled over the explanation of his mediocre piano skills. How his hand was so soft but sure and he held Dan’s own and pulled him to his feet. As his teacher went on about the ins and outs of math things he didn’t care about Dan drew little doodles, of hearts and Phil coming to rescue him from the horrors of sports. He sighed happily and looked out the window thinking about Phil Lester, unknowing that somewhere in the school Phil was sighing happily and looking out a window thinking about Dan Howell.

                                                     Act I Scene II

“I found out he plays piano, Peej!” Phil beamed, waving his hands around for emphasis. “That’s so impressive, honestly. I wonder if he can play anything else.”

“I think I heard somewhere that he plays drums, but that could just be a rumor.” PJ paid the conversation little mind, far more focused on the poster he was designing for the school play.

“Eh, he seems the type,” Chris added helpfully. “You know: loud, obnoxious and in your face.”

Phil scowled at his now snickering friends. “He is not. He’s always really sweet and quiet when I talk to him.”

“Yeah?” Chris challenged. “Well, I had a history class with him one time and his own friend asked the teacher if he could change seats because Dan was distracting him too much.”

“Sean said that one time when they were taking a chemistry exam Dan started singing the periodic table. Out loud,” PJ added helpfully.

“He’s boisterous, maybe,” Phil conceded, “But he’s probably hilarious which is why his friend was so distracted and besides, learning a song to memorize the periodic table is pretty smart.”

Chris rolled his eyes. “Mate, we could tell you that Dan killed Mother Theresa and you’d just say ‘I mean, she probably deserved it.’” PJ chuckled next to him and Phil simply shot him another dirty look. “Anyway, as much as you love talking about Dan we really ought to move on because me and Peej, well, we don’t enjoy it near as much as you.”

Before Phil could argue PJ chimed in with a, “Help me decide on which one of these posters is better. Mr. Walters wants them up by this afternoon so people have plenty of time to sign up before auditions next month.” He showed them a couple of hand drawn posters, one featuring a more 60’s theme with psychedelic rainbow patterns and little people scattered all around doing various theatre things whilst the other  was more focused on space, complete with little aliens all over it. Both said in clear letters “Join this year’s spring musical! All You Need Is Love: A 60’s space drama written and produced by PJ Liguori and Sophie Newton. Auditions after school in the auditorium on 8/8”

“I like the space one,” Phil said.

“No, no. The 60’s is way better,” Chris argued. “It’s more fun looking and approachable. Everybody likes the 60’s.”

“No, everybody likes space,” Phil insisted.

“No, you like space, you big nerd.”

“I think we should ask the cards.”

“Phil,” PJ groaned, “you can’t rely on your tarot cards for every decision you have to make.”

“Yes, I can. I asked the cards and they said it was fine,” Phil smirked, pulling out his deck of Pokemon cards. He was honestly rather proud of them; he had spent an entire afternoon dedicated to learning each of the 56 cards in the full tarot deck and assigning a Pokemon to each one, then an entire month (and more money than he’d care to admit) collecting every single card until his deck was finally complete. He closed his eyes and focused. “Alright, we’re just doing a yes or no question so we can just use the Major Arcana, or would you rather do a full reading with all the cards?”

PJ rolled his eyes, but said, “Just the Major is fine. You can do a full reading when it’s more important decisions.”

Phil nodded, separating out the twenty two cards needed. “Okay, PJ, I’m going to start shuffling. Focus really hard on your question and when you think it’s time, tell me to stop.”

PJ closed his eyes for a moment, breathing deeply and said, “Stop.”

Immediately, Phil quit shuffling and laid the cards out in a neat row. “Is this good, or do you want me to shuffle again?”

“That’s fine. My question is ‘Should I use the space themed poster?’”

“Alright, choose a card.”

PJ chose one fourth from the left and Phil flipped it over, revealing a card of Mew. Phil grinned, before announcing: “You got The World, which talks about your conscious and unconscious joining and how you’re facing an important juncture that will make your path for the future clear. It also means that you’re going to gain true insight to the nature of yourself.”

“Yeah, yeah, but is it a yes or a no?” Chris said impatiently.

“It’s a yes,” Phil said with a smug smirk.

“And how do we know you’re not bullshitting us to get your way?”

“Well, if you think about it there was the whole conscious, unconscious thing, and he clearly preferred the space one, considering how much time he spent on it.” They looked at PJ for confirmation who shrugged and nodded with a sheepish grin. “Plus if you have the play be ‘you’, having this decision be insight into the true nature of yourself makes sense since it’s really more about space with a sixties flair than sixties with space themes.” Chris frowned thoughtfully, slowly nodding his head before Phil grinned and added, “Also, you don’t.”

“Why you absolute-”

“Stow it,” PJ hissed. “Mr. Bedsole just walked in.” And with that, the three quieted down to focus on the droning lecture about World War II.

                                                    Act I Scene III

“But you said we were going out for coffee today!” Dan pouted at Louise, who, in her defense, looked absolutely heartbroken denying him.

“I’m sorry, Dan,” she said. “I really am, but Chummy says there’s a huge sale going on in Brighton today and I really don’t want to miss it. I promise we can go tomorrow.”

“I do swear that it’s a one day sale,” Zoe added earnestly, looking almost as remorseful as Louise. “I’ll buy you a drink tomorrow to make up for it.”

“That’s all well and good for tomorrow, but what am I meant to do for today?” he whined.

“You could always come with us?” Louise suggested weakly. “We can get coffee at the station to have on the train?”

Dan sighed, quietly enough that the two girls didn’t hear . “As much as I do honestly enjoy going shopping with you two, I’m really not up for a two hour train ride today. However, if you see anything you think I’d like, I wouldn’t say no to some more peace offerings for bailing on me today.”

“You cheeky thing!” Zoe laughed, gently pinching his cheek. “You’re a right mess and a half, you are.”

He batted her hand away with a smile. “Yeah, yeah. Seriously, though. What am I going to do today? My mum's going to be out until five or later and I left my key at home. Do you want me to just wander around Reading lost and alone that whole time?”

“Oh, please,” Louise laughed with an eye roll. “Tyler exists, so you know there’s no way you can be bored for too long.”

“My ears are on fire right now,” Tyler sang, joining them at their table. “What are we talking about? Besides me, of course.”

“Well, someone ditched me to go look at- What is it exactly that you’re after?”

“Clothes,” both girls said in unison.

“Going to that Brighton sale?” Tyler asked with a knowing smirk. “I’d join you, but honestly, I don’t want to.”

They all laughed together before Dan piped up, “Anyway, they’re leaving me for clothes and have put my afternoon activities in your command.”

Tyler winced. “I’m sorry, Dan-”

“No!”

“I have a date!” Tyler defended. “And, boo, you know I think you’re the best thing since sliced bread, but you third wheeling me isn’t going to get me laid.”

Dan cast him a betrayed look. “So, basically what you’re telling me is I’m basically screwed? Carrie’s busy with theatre, you’re going on a date, these two would rather pet garments they can’t afford then get coffee with me, and Sean is probably off sucking face with Signe.”

“You could always just follow Phil home and sit outside like a lost puppy and hope he lets you in,” Tyler suggested, somewhat helpfully.

“Why don’t you actually fuck off?” Dan snapped,as his face turned scarlet. “That was one time, okay?”

“You stood outside his house in the rain for an hour pretending you thought it was someone else’s house before you realized nobody was home.”

“That was two years ago!”

“I still can’t believe it happened at all.”

Dan buried his face in his hands to hide his blushing cheeks. “You guys are the absolute worst people in the world and I hate every single one of you,” he groaned.

Tyler reached over and patted his cheek fondly. “Oh, boo, we know that’s not true. Who else would listen to you wax poetic about Phil?”

Again the three laughed together. “I’m still without anything to do this afternoon,” Dan pointed out.

“Can’t you just break in?” Tyler suggested. “I do that at my house all the time.”

“My mom routinely locks all the windows so mine is the only one open and there’s no way I can get to the second floor.”

“You could hang out with Sean and Signe,” Louise offered. “I’m sure they’d at least try to contain themselves while you’re around.”

“Yeah, but even when they’re not trying to climb into each other’s mouth I still always feel like I’m third wheeling so fucking hard. And not like tricycle third wheel either.”

“Why don’t you just go hang out at the coffee house on your own or go nerd shopping?” Zoe recommended. “You have your phone and headphones, right? Just sit in a corner and ignore everyone.”

Dan let out a long suffering sigh. “I guess that’s my only option, unless I want to go to the library or something.” He sighed and complained, “Why is there nothing to do here?”

“There’s plenty to do, you’re just too immersed in your laptop to experience any of them,” Louise laughed. “Chummy and I can always find plenty to do.”

“You have no idea what a town with nothing to do looks like, sweetheart,” Tyler scoffed. “Jackson was like a third this size and a good hour away from anything even remotely interesting.”

“Yeah, well, this place being better than your hometown is zero help right now. Somebody give me something to do.”

“You could just Google it and do the tourist-y things that pop up,” Zoe beamed. “Me and Alfie did that one time and it was loads of fun.”

“That sounds like a really great date,” Dan agreed, a dash of sarcasm in his tone. “However, since I’m a sexually ambiguous nerd who can’t properly talk to anyone outside of you guys, there’s very little chance of me getting a date any time soon. Plus it’s pouring and I wouldn’t want to wander around Reading in the rain even if I had a date.” Tyler took this moment to mutter about how he’d done it for Phil before, but quieted down when Dan gave him a stern glance.

“Well, whatever you decide to do, I wish you luck,” Louise said, taking out her phone to check the time. “However, Chummy and I must be getting on as our train leaves in less than an hour.”

“Bye, Louise. Bye Zoe,” Dan and Tyler chimed together. The two girls laughed and gave their final farewell hugs before leaving, leaving Dan and Tyler alone.

“So, who is this guy, anyway?” Dan asked, picking at his fingernails.

“Uh, his name is Michael and I met him on Tinder.”

“Phil’s middle name-”

“Is Michael. Yes, I know,” Tyler teased. “You’ve told us all more than once.”

Dan merely rolled his eyes and said, “So, Michael. Is this a guy you might actually like to date or is he just a casual hookup?”

“I don’t know, honestly,” Tyler shrugged. “He seemed nice enough while we were messaging but not exactly my kind of guy, you know? I may just keep in contact with him to hang out with on Fridays when I’m bored because somebody is too invested in Mario Kart to go party with me.”

“Please. You and I both know that I’m probably the last person you’d want to go with you to a party. I’d just stand awkwardly in a corner playing on my phone all night and making everyone who dared to talk to me feel bad because they wouldn’t understand a single word I mumbled.”

Tyler cast him yet another sympathetic look and Dan swore he was going to rip his eyebrows out if another person looked at him as if he was the dog they were leaving behind at the shelter. “Have you considered hanging out with Carrie this afternoon? Like, I know you said you weren’t doing theatre this year-”

“The four hours I spent locked in a janitor’s closet for being in the school play said I wasn’t doing theatre this year.”

Tyler narrowed his eyes at the interruption, but continued. “Anyway, you said you weren’t going to be in the play, but I’m pretty sure they’re just doing like pre-pre-pre-play stuff today. Hanging up posters and the like. I mean, it’s something at least.”

Dan considered his options for a moment. While he had sworn off acting for the year, he really liked most of the theatre kids he hung out with last time. Besides, it was completely harmless and he did always enjoy spending time with Carrie. “Yeah, I suppose. Anyway, if it is horrible I can always pretend my grandma is in the hospital or something to get out of it.”

“That’s the Dan Howell spirit we all know and love,” Tyler grinned, clapping him on the back.

This will be fine. What could go wrong?

                                                    Act I Scene IV

There was no way this was happening.

“PJ, I can’t go in there,” Phil hissed, physically keeping his friend by his side and out of that room. For in that room sat none other than Dan Howell, looking perfect as always whilst he lounged next to Carrie, who was laughing along at something he said. “I thought you said he wouldn’t be here today!”

PJ shrugged, clearly not seeing the problem and Phil had never felt so betrayed. “He said he wasn’t coming back last year, but maybe he changed his mind. Or maybe he’s just helping a friend hang posters. Who knows? You might if you go in there and talk to him.”

“I can’t let him see me like this,” Phil refused. “I took out my contacts last lesson because my eyes were all itchy and the redness still hasn’t gone down and I look terrible.”

“Maybe he’s into the whole robot look.”

“You’re not helping!”

“Look, mate,” PJ sighed. “You can stay and help or you can go home and sulk, but either way I’ve got to be in there to take charge of this whole shindig and I can already feel Sophie glaring at me for being late. I know you don’t look one hundred percent your best ever but it’s a Monday afternoon after school and nobody looks great, and I swear to god if you tell me Dan looks amazing I will never let you borrow my Legend of Zelda games ever again.” Phil gave him a sheepish grin. “And for what it’s worth your face shape works really well with those glasses and the redness is pretty much gone.”

Phil smiled softly at his friend. “You always know what to say, Peej.”

PJ smirked and winked back at him. “It truly is a gift. Now come on, let’s go hang some posters and get some theatre nerds hyped about a play.”

As the two walked in a kind of hush fell over the gathered students and Phil couldn’t help but notice the panicked look Dan gave Carrie as he passed by them, taking a seat next to Chris and Alexandra. He leaned over to point it out to Chris, but he merely shot him a look before pointedly focusing on PJ and Sophie at the front of the room. Phil huffed; he knew why he was being shushed, but that didn’t mean he had to like it.

“Okay, everyone, thanks for being here!” PJ beamed at the eight students sprawled across various chairs and desks. “We really appreciate your help. Does anyone have any questions?”

“Why don’t you tell them what exactly it is that they’re helping with?” Sophie suggested from behind him with a smile and a fond roll of the eyes.

PJ gave her a crooked grin in thanks before returning his attention to the crowd. “Right, I should. Well, as you all should know the school puts on a musical every spring, and if you didn’t know then you do now. Anyway, as this is our last year Mr. Walters has agreed to put on a play that Sophie and I wrote, and he’s put us in charge of everything from production to advertisement. Today we’re putting up posters around the school to let everyone know about the auditions that are happening next month, giving them plenty of time to pluck up the courage to sign up since that’s probably the hardest part of school plays for a lot of us.” There were a few scattered chuckles, and PJ carried on. “Since there are ten of us and five main areas we need to put these up, we’re going to be splitting into teams of two, and each team is going to get twenty posters to hang up. Yeah, it sounds like a lot, but we want these everywhere. I don’t want there to be a single person at this school who doesn’t know about this play. That means staple them to bulletin boards, hang them up on those weird clothes pin things outside the art room, tape them on every door and stairwell you can find. So yeah, I mean it when I say everywhere.”

“Alright then,” Sophie chimed in. “After that rousing speech, everyone pick a partner and we’ll arm you with a stapler, tape, clothespins, blu tack and more posters than you’ll know what to do with. Go!” Phil swore he saw PJ, Carrie, and Chris all share a look, but he brushed it off to partner up with Chris, only to find that he had already linked arms with Alexandra. He glanced around the room to see that PJ and Sophie were obviously in each other's pockets, Carrie was chatting with Matt, and Tom and Gi were leaned against one another playing some kind of app on Tom’s phone leaving-

“Uh, hi again?”

Phil whipped his head around to see Dan standing in front of him with a bit of red tinting his ears. “Your friend abandon you, too?” Phil chuckled. When Dan didn’t answer and just continued blinking at him, Phil flushed bright red immediately starting to back track. “Not that I’m saying- Well, what I mean is more that- You see what I’m trying to say is-” he finally sputtered to a stop. “Sorry?”

Dan blinked at him a couple more times before realization dawned on his face and he blushed to match Phil. “No, no it’s fine, I promise! I’m not offended or anything! Carrie did totally ditch me to partner with Matt. I was just really distracted by your glasses; I didn’t know you wore them.”

Phil chuckled nervously, scratching behind his neck. “Yeah, they’re- yeah. They’re kinda big and dumb looking so I try not to wear them at school too much.”

“It’s not that,” Dan mumbled, looking down and to the left while shooting Phil looks from beneath his lashes. “They actually really suit you. They make you look really smart I guess.” He flushed a bit darker before adding, “I like them.”

Well, if Phil wasn’t about to pass out before from how adorable and shy Dan looked he definitely was now. Dan liked his glasses. Dan Howell liked his glasses. He took a moment to gather himself before he could blurt out that he was about to call the optometrist and tell her to cancel all his contact orders from now until forever because Dan Howell liked his glasses. “Thanks, that means a lot,” he said instead. “I don’t really like them all that much so they can use all the love they can get from other people.”

Dan sputtered out an abrasive laugh which garnered a couple people’s attention and made Phil’s chest feel like it had been filled with warm helium before Dan slapped his hands over his mouth to muffle it. Phil considered telling Dan his hands would would better suited in Phil’s instead of quieting the music that was his laugh, but decided that was maybe a little forward. “If you don’t mind me asking, why are you wearing your glasses if you hate them so much?”

“Oh, sometimes my contacts can bother my eyes and last period they were really itchy and so I took them out instead of trying to rub my eyeballs into the back of my skull.”

Phil mentally slapped himself for actually saying that out loud, but Dan just giggled. “Well, I hope they’re feeling better. I noticed you had some red in your eyes, so I’m glad it’s nothing serious.”

At the mention of red Phil slammed his eyes shut and covered them with his hands. “PJ said the red was all gone!” he whined.

Dan immediately started flapping his hands nervously. “No, no it’s fine! It’s hardly noticeable at all! I only noticed because I was staring at your face up close, and oh my god, I can’t believe I said that out loud. Someone please stop me.” By the end of his sentence Dan was a darker red than Phil previously thought possible and looked  just about ready for the world to split in half and swallow him whole. He was adorable, and Phil was about to die.

“Nah, I get it,” Phil chuckled with a smile. “You said the glasses were distracting so it makes sense for you to stare.”

Dan opened his mouth like he was about to argue Phil’s point, but there was a cough behind Phil and they both turned to see PJ standing there with a stack of flyers in his hands and a knowing smirk on his lips. “Well, since the two of you were too busy - um, let’s say talking - to come up and pick an area to work in the only one left is the gym and lunchroom, so I hope the two of you brought umbrellas.” Dan looked absolutely panic stricken at the thought of needing an umbrella, much to Phil’s confusion, but PJ simply carried on. “Sophie has the stuff to hang these up with so you two need to get going or we’re still going to be here when school lets in tomorrow.”

Phil groaned melodramatically and accused PJ of forsaking him and throwing him to the depths of hell, but still smiled and thanked Sophie - who was giggling behind her hands - when he got their tools. The only problem was that Dan was strangely quiet the entire time, and not in the adorably shy way he was earlier that afternoon when they were walking to class together. No, this was more akin to the silence of a man being lead to the gallows, and that just wasn’t going to work in Phil’s book. “Hey, are you okay?”

Dan gnawed his bottom lip for a moment before sighing and saying, “I’m really not sure if I want to tell you. Like on one hand it’s really not that big of a deal, and avoiding it is only going to make it way worse, but on the other hand it’s really embarrassing, and I don’t like talking about it.”

Phil hummed in thought, tapping his chin and looking Dan up and down through squinted eyes. To most it might look like he was just observing the younger boy to come up with some sort of plan, but in reality he was just taking the opportunity to check him out. “What if I hum and then you say it really quickly and if I hear you, I can pretend I didn’t understand and if I didn’t hear you then you at least got it off your chest and you don’t have to worry anymore.”

Dan laughed and smiled so hard his eyes were almost completely closed. “You are such a strange person, Phil Lester,” he said with what Phil was adamantly interpreting as fondness.

“You know, you’re actually not the first person to tell me that.”

Dan rolled his eyes but he still had that grin so Phil didn’t take it to heart. “Unfortunately, that plan won’t work, so I’m just going to tell you, but you can’t make fun of me, okay?” Phil nodded eagerly, knowing that there was no way he could ever deliberately make Dan feel bad about himself. Dan took a deep breath and quickly said, “MyhairisnaturallyreallycurlysoIstraightenitbutwhenitgetswetitgetscurlyagainandit’srainingandIdidn’tbringanything.”

Phil blinked, trying to process what he just heard until it finally clicked and he beamed. “Why didn’t you say so?! You can borrow my coat.”

Dan’s eyes bugged out at the very idea. “I can’t just take your coat! What are you going to wear? It may be a short walk, but you’ll still wind up soaked by the time we get inside.”

Phil shrugged. “Well, any way you look at it, one of us is going to look like a drowned rat by the end of this no matter what. You seem to be a lot more worried about it than me, so why shouldn’t you be the one to stay dry? Besides, I have a change of clothes in my bag since I’m meeting up with my family for dinner after this. Take the coat, Dan.”

“But Phil-”

“Too late!” he sang, pulling his arm out of the sleeve. “I’m  taking it off and I’m not going to put it back on until it’s time to leave. If you don’t take it then the poor coat will just sit here and be useless while we both get wet. Do you want my coat to feel that way, Dan?”

Dan giggled at his overreaction, but took the coat with a gentle smile. “Thanks, Phil. I mean it.”

“No problem,” Phil smiled back. “But now you do have to hold the flyers and stuff. Just shove them under your jacket so they don’t get wet.”

Dan nodded and took the papers. “Alright then, let’s do this.”

                                                    Act I Scene V

“Oh my god, Louise, it was amazing,” Dan gushed over the phone. He had tried texting Louise but he was way too excited and his fingers kept slipping and pretty much everything he wrote had more exclamation points than actual letters. “How do we have so much in common and I never knew it?”

“Maybe because you only ever stalked him instead of talking and sharing your interests?” she teasingly suggested.

“You can’t tell but I’m giving you a dirty look right now,” Dan pouted, tracing his finger over the numbers written on the Post-It note Phil had given him. “And there will be plenty of actual talking between the two of us now, since he gave me his number.”

Louise squealed across the line. She had never made it a secret that Phil wasn’t her first choice for Dan’s big crush, but she had to admit that the fact that Dan was so over the moon for him was precious, and anything that made Dan happy made her happy. “Oh my god, really? What happened?”

“Well, we had to go out to the gym to hang posters and since it was pouring I was complaining about my hair-”

“Like you always do.”

“Shut it. Anyway, he insisted that I used his jacket to keep dry and at the end of the day it was still raining so he told me to keep it and I could text him about returning it later,” Dan sighed happily, reliving every moment of the afternoon in perfect clarity. “Louise, it was amazing. He’s amazing.”

“Have you texted him yet?” Louise demanded. “You have to tell me everything when you do.”

“I don’t want to return his jacket yet,” Dan admitted. He hadn’t told Louise that it was warm and smelled like Phil and that was why he didn’t want to lose it but he was pretty sure she knew. “What if I text him and all he wants to talk about is getting his coat?”

Louise sighed and Dan knew she was her rolling her eyes. “You’re being ridiculous, you know that, right? Of course he doesn’t want to just talk about that. Giving someone your coat as an excuse to keep talking to someone is one of the oldest tricks in the book. I’m pretty sure it’s been a thing since coats were invented.”

“I don’t know, Louise,” Dan said, biting his thumb nail. “I mean, Phil’s just a really nice person. He was probably just giving me his coat because it was nice. He’s not really the type to play tricks like that.”

“Everyone play tricks, even if it’s subconscious,” Louise dismissed. Dan could almost see her nodding sagely. “He probably did give you the jacket because you needed it, but the phone number was just so the two of you can talk. If he really was only interested in the coat then he would have just set up a time to get it back when he gave it to you.”

“You really think so?” Dan asked nervously. “What if I make a fool of myself and he never speaks to me again?”

“Number one that won’t happen. Number two, even if it does are you really in any worse of a boat? It’s not like you were actually talking to him before this anyway.”

“You’re being super unhelpful and also the absolute worst.”

“You love it. Now text that lion loving nerd and make sure I’m your maid of honor at the wedding.”

“What do I even say?” Dan whined.

“Just introduce yourself, you complete dollop head. Just say ‘Hi, this is Dan!’”

Dan sighed dramatically, flopping back and extending out three of his long limbs. He winced when they all settled into that nice stretched feeling and quickly changed phone hands so he could do that last one as well. “Fine, I’ll do it as soon as I get off the phone with you.”

“Oh, well, in that case my mother has been calling me to come downstairs for about five minutes and I’m definitely not making this up so you have to text Phil.”

“Louise I hate you!”

“Love you, too!” she cackled, sending a couple kissing noises across the line before hanging up.

Dan groaned and glared at his phone for abandoning him, hoping that Louise would somehow be able to feel it. After a moment he sighed and pulled up messages and tapped “Compose”

To: Phil 5:44

hello! this is dan the guy u left your coat with this afternoon lol.

Dan closed the app to open YouTube, not expecting a response any time soon, but before he could finish pulling up his subscription box his phone buzzed.

From: Phil 5:47

Hi!! How was your walk home? Did you stay dry and everything? I would have given you a ride, but I was already late to meet my parents. I’m sorry. :(

Dan took a moment to breathe calmly but quickly gave up in favor of squealing in delight as he rolled back and forth, clutching his phone to his chest. He just had to tell Louise.

To: The Mum Friend 5:49

omg hes so nice. like he asked if i stayed dry on the way home and apologized for not driving me home himself  #phillesterangelconfirmed

To: Phil the Actual Angel 5:51

dw about it ^-^ i stayed pretty dry. yhanks to you i don’t look like a hobbit reject.

From: Phil the Actual Angel 5:54

Lol any Hobbit that rejects you is missing out on making their Hobbit village cuter than all the other ones. You can come join my elf city and we can be too tall together.

To: The Mum Friend 5:57

LOUISSE HE CALLERD ME CUTER IM DYING SEND HELPP

To: Phil the Actual Angel 5:58

lets be honest wed both be loners. im too tall for the hobbits and ur too clumsy for the elves.

From: Phil the Actual Angel 6:00

Why must you crush my dreams Danyul? :’< I’m not that clumsy

To: Phil the Actual Angel 2:02

i think the paint still stuck in my hair from where u knocked me into the art supplies in the prop room would beg to differ.

From: Phil the Actual Angel 2:04

Okay, I GUESS that’s a fair point. And hey, as long as we’re outcasts together that’s not too bad in my book. ^-^

To: Phil the Actual Angel 2:04

my my phillip r u flirting with me?

From: Phil the Actual Angel 2:05

That depends entirely on if it’s working :D Hey, by the way, what lunch do you have?

Dan frowned at the sudden topic change, but shook his head and went along with it for now.

To: Phil the Actual Angel 6:06

i have 2nd y?

From: Phil the Actual Angel 2:07

You do? That’s the same one I have? How come I’ve never seen you? D:

To: Phil the Actual Angel 2:08

probs because i sit with my friends and we try to avoid human interaction lol

From: Phil the Actual Angel 2:10

Same, honestly. Do you think you and your friends would want to come and eat lunch with me and mine tomorrow? We usually sit out under the tree next to the front office.

To: Phil the Actual Angel 2:11

i am so sorry can i answer you in a sec my mum wants me

Dan took a deep breath, trying not to panic. He quickly dialed up Louise and waited with bated breath as it rang again and again and again and again and ag-

“Dan? What can-”

“HE ASKED ME TO EAT LUNCH WITH HIM TOMORROW!” Dan shouted before she could finish her greeting.

“Wait, hold on a minute. Who did what now?”

“Phil! He asked me to eat lunch with him tomorrow!” he repeated in a much quieter but no calmer tone. “Well, actually he asked me to ask all of you if you might be interested in eating lunch with his group tomorrow. What should I even say to that? ‘Yes, I’d like to eat lunch with you tomorrow and every following day for the rest of our lives’?”

“You could always just say you’ll ask,” she said with an underlying laugh. “I don’t see a problem with us sitting with them, though. All of us like meeting new people so it should be fun.”

“You mean it? Everything will be fine?”

“I’m sure of it, and if anyone says otherwise, I’ll wallop them on the head.”

“You’re the best, Louise.”

“I know it. Now go set up your lunch date already.” And with that the line clicked dead and Dan was once again left alone with his phone.

To: Phil the Actual Angel 5:14

sorry! my mum is v demanding sometimes T_T but yeah lunch tomorrow sounds great! all my friends like meeting new people so it should be lots of fun

From: Phil the Actual Angel 5:16

Don’t worry about it! ^-^ So you want to just meet at the tree or in the lunchroom or what?

To: Phil the Actual Angel 5:18

i think we can find our way to the tree so that should be fine ^-^ see u tomorrow!

From: Phil the Actual Angel 5:20

It’s a date!

Phil had been sitting patiently in bed, fiddling with his phone, waiting for Dan to come back from the bathroom for a good half hour. He let out an extraverted sigh and put the phone down on his night stand table.

”Dan!” He called, to no avail.

They had been very busy lately, with planning and arranging work things and filming videos in advance and going to meetings, and packing up their stuff for a fucking move on top of that. So they hadn’t exactly had time for each other lately, and Phil had been sexually frustrated for some time now. That’s why he’d made them both go to bed early tonight, just so he could seduce Dan and get his way without having to ask out loud. Dan, however, was not the quickest at getting ready for bed.

The hallway was dark outside his bedroom and he squinted his eyes to see if he could find a trace of Dan anywhere. Dan had been kind of giddy all evening and jumping around, cracking jokes and making them both laugh until they cried, probably sleep deprived to the max, so Phil wasn’t in the least surprised when he heard a low grunting sound coming from the top of the staircase.

He sighed and rolled his eyes, preparing for whatever charades Dan was up to next.

The next thing he heard were thuds against the carpeted floor of the hallway, and soon enough a dark figure of Dan’s body appeared before him, crawling on all fours.

“What are you doing,” Phil sighed, fondly.

“Roar!” Dan growled low in his throat and clawed at Phil’s direction.

“Oh my God, if it’s not the wild grizzly bear in it’s natural habitat, preparing to pounce at its prey!” Phil gasped, deciding to play along as there really was no way of stopping Dan anyway.

Soon Dan appeared in the doorway and continued crawling on all fours, eyeing Phil through squinted eyes and deep puffs of air.

“It appears as if the grizzly has set eyes on his prey, the dainty, pale gazelle, on top of a mountain, and is closing in slowly.” Phil narrated as Dan circled the bed slowly. He could see Dan suppress a snort at his description of the gazelle. He yelped as Dan suddenly reached out for his ankle.

“Oh no, he’s going in for an attack, but the gazelle got away!” He giggled as Dan crawled to the other side of the bed at full speed.

Dan let out another roar and jumped up onto the foot of the bed, slowly crawling towards Phil who scrambled to curl up against the headboard, all the while giggling hysterically.

“T-the gazelle is now trapped between a tree and the bear and the- ah, it’s not looking too bright for the poor thing!” Phil gasped as Dan took hold of his legs, pinning them down on the bed as he crawled closer with a wicked grin.

“Rawr!” He growled right in Phil’s ear, hands moving to pin his arms as he tried to struggle free.

“Noo, please Mr. Bear, have mercy!” Giggled Phil and felt a shudder as Dan’s lips brushed the nape of his neck. “Grizzly now ha-has the gazelle right where he wants it and is now munching down whatever flesh he can reach.”

“Mm,” Dan hummed as he bit down Phil’s neck playfully.

Phil managed to free his legs from beneath Dan somehow and wrapped them around his waist as Dan leaned down on his forearms, sucking as much skin between his teeth as he could in between giggles.

“Poor gazelle, it’s not looking bright for his future, look away children!” Phil managed between laughs as Dan moved down his neck to his collarbones. He sneaked a hand under the t-shirt Phil usually wore to bed and pulled it up. Phil lifted his arms so he could toss it onto the floor somewhere and let out a content sigh as Dan kissed down his chest.

He closed his eyes, and relaxed against the bed, letting Dan do whatever he wanted, everything felt good, and he felt Dan’s crotch brush against his own, and his hands wandering along his sides, and it all felt so good…

Until Dan let out another growl. Phil’s eyes shot open and he stared down at Dan, who was looking up at him with a cheeky grin.

“Are you still a bear?” Phil asked. Dan growled in return, taking one of Phil’s nipples between his teeth, causing Phil to squeak in surprise.

“No! You are not making this sexual, Dan. I swear to God,” Phil objected, trying to sit up but Dan was holding him down, still licking and nibbling on his nipple and it felt so good, so Phil simply sank back into the mattress again.

Dan let out another growl and Phil covered his face with an arm.

“Sto-op,” he groaned. “This is so weird.”

“You like it,” Dan smirked down at him, intentionally grinding their crotches together.

“Please,” Phil breathed in half-protest, half-pleasure. Mostly pleasure. “Stop.”

“Fine,” Dan said, mouth suddenly right against his ear, sending shivers down Phil’s back. He brought their hard dicks together once again, causing them both to pant. He continued to grind against Phil, now with his face pressed against Phil’s shoulder and his hands in his hair, fucking him through their pyjamas.

Dan noticed Phil’s slight desperation as he was panting, grinding back against Dan as much as his weight on him allowed, hands grasping at his shirt.

“Dan,” he mumbled, nuzzling his nose against Dan’s shoulder.

“Yeah,” Dan said, understanding his silent plea, and pulled back to sit on his knees. He ran his hands up and down Phil’s thighs for some time, letting him catch his breath.

“Dan,” Phil said again, a bit more urgently. Dan reached to pull at the hem of his pyjamas. Phil lifted his hips obediently and kicked his pants off. While Dan took his own shirt and pants off, Phil roamed through one of the night stands and got a bottle of lube out, tossing it at Dan.

“So impatient,” Dan snickered, leaning down to peck Phil’s cheek, nose, forehead, anything he could before Phil pushed him away by his chest.

“Come on,” he huffed.

“Fine,” Dan caved in and bent down to kiss down his torso and belly instead. Phil sighed, hands weaving through brown curls and he lifted his hips slightly as an idea came to mind.

“Dan,” he said, “Can you…” He lifted his hips again and felt Dan snort against his abdomen.

“I’m not licking you, no,” Dan said and sat back up. He tutted at Phil’s pouting face and shook his head. “No, not unless you’re fresh out of the shower. I ain’t licking no butts before then.”

Phil let out a defeated sigh and threw his head back against the pillows. “Whatever.”

“You want me to fuck you or not?” Dan asked.

“Yes!” Phil said impatiently.

“Fine, calm down, I’m getting there,” Dan mused as he coated two fingers with lube. He circled them around Phil’s hole teasingly for a moment, watching him squirm, before pushing in slowly.

He leaned down on one arm, fingers moving in and out of Phil with the other, as he kissed his shoulder lovingly.

Phil rocked back against his hand, breathing slightly ragged.

Dan added a third finger once he felt him loosening up, and pushed them in and out a bit more forcefully. Phil ground his hips back down, panting, and Dan watched him intently. Sweat was starting to form on his forehead, his eyes closed in concentration, lips parted.

“Mm,” Dan hummed, “Gonna fuck you so hard you’ll go into hibernation.”

It took a few seconds until Phil’s eyes snapped open to glare hard at him. Dan slumped forward with laughter as Phil smacked him on his back.

“Shut up! Oh my God!”

“Sorry,” Dan giggled against his shoulder. “Sorry, sorry.”

“Get on it!” Phil whined.

“Okay, okay,” Dan said and pulled away from Phil, avoiding his piercing glare as he lubed his cock up. “I’m bearly there, calm down.”

“I can’t believe you,” Phil sighed.

“Shh,” Dan hushed him. He was now slowly pushing in, watching Phil’s face completely change from frustration to pleasure the deeper he got. Whining, Phil wrapped his arms around Dan’s shoulders, bringing him down against his chest, legs circling his waist, holding him close. Dan relaxed into the new position and began moving his hips slowly in and out.

He reached his hands around Phil’s head, playing with his hair as he panted into his neck.

“Fuck, Dan,” he heard Phil’s muffled voice.

“I know,” he breathed.

“It’s been so long,” Phil sighed. “Go faster.”

Dan did as he was told, snapping his hips into Phil at a faster pace, going harder for each thrust.

“Don’t stop,” came Phil’s slightly more desperate voice. “Please.”

Nodding against his shoulder, Dan said breathlessly, “Couldn’t bear to stop now.”

That earned him another slap on his back and a loud groan from Phil.

“Stop with the fucking animal puns, I swear to God!”

Dan struggled to suppress his laughter and fucked harder into Phil to get him to forget. It worked, as Phil was now a puddle of goo beneath him, hands grasping at whatever flesh he could reach, which so happened to be Dan’s love handles. Dan wasn’t complaining, as he tended to like the pain, secretly.

“I hate you,” came a muffled groan which he chose to ignore.

“Bear with me,” Dan said between giggles and Phil actually tried to push him away. “No, no, no, I’m sorry!”

“Stop,” Phil muttered. Dan leaned back to grasp his hips instead, thrusting even harder into Phil, feeling himself reaching the edge with each thrust.

“Gonna come,” he warned. Phil nodded, reaching down to stroke himself.

“Wait,” he asked.

“Hurry up.”

Phil mumbled something incoherent as he rocked his hips into Dan, meeting his thrusts. 

Dan knocked his hand away and grabbed his cock, stroking him in time with his frequent thrusts. He felt the familiar pool of warmth in his abdomen and seconds later he was coming hard inside of Phil, slumping down against him helplessly. Phil came shortly after, moaning so delicately and grasping at Dan’s skin.

“Dan,” he complained after a while, pushing uselessly at Dan’s limp body.

“Sorry,” Dan mumbled and rolled over to crash next to Phil on the bed. Phil winced as he felt warm liquid leaking out of him and he rolled over to his side, away from Dan.

“Couldn’t you pull out,” he muttered into the pillow, not really mad, just thinking Dan deserved any kind of scolding.

He felt Dan’s warm hand stroking up his arm and relaxed immediately.

“Sorry,” Dan simply said again, not sounding sorry at all.

“Just gimme a napkin,” Phil muttered.

Moments later a napkin was thrown at his face. He turned to slap Dan again, while not being able to hold back his laughter.

“I fucking hate you,” he giggled in tune with Dan.

“I know. I’m simply unbearable,” Dan said, gasping desperately for air through his laughter. Phil shook his head, and started wiping the drying come off of his stomach instead.

“Jesus Christ,” he mumbled, amused.

Dan shifted closer so that he was spooning Phil from behind, nuzzling his face into his shoulder. “I know you love me.”

“Whatever,” Phil shrugged.

“By the way, I don’t think bears eat gazelles,” Dan pointed out after a while of simply listening to each other’s breathing.

“Really?” Phil questioned.

“Yeah. I think they eat, like, fish… and blueberries.” Dan shifted closer, his grip on Phil’s middle tightening. “Haven’t you seen Brother Bear?”

“I have, but I thought… Mammals, they-” He paused, head spinning. “Why don’t I know this?”

Dan snorted behind him. “Maybe ‘cause you just had a mind-blowing orgasm? By a fucking bear?”

Phil let out a long sigh. “I guess,” he said, ignoring the last part.

“Next time, though, can I be the prey?” Dan asked innocently.

“Only if I can be a lion,” Phil deadpanned, catching Dan off guard.

“Of course, whatever makes your boat float.”

Phil smacked his hand.

“That’s not even a saying,” he mumbled.

“Yes it is,” Dan giggled.

“Fine. Now let’s sleep.”