#ows

[♡] shinya hiragi as born to die. ‘are you okay?’ you barely heard the question over your ragged loud inhales, as you desperately tried to catch your breath. you had never run so fast ever in your entire life. you leaned against the wall as you slid onto the ground, feet giving away in soreness. you felt his hand on your shoulder, finally causing you to look up at shinya. he too was completely worn out and beaten up, equally struggling to breath. and yet, here he was, worrying about you. your heart jumped at he thought, before you pushed it to the back of your mind. now was not the time to figure out if shinya hiragi cared about you. ‘ye-yeah’ you gasped and he too kneeled down to rest, turning back warily as though the vampires might still be following the two of you. ‘what about you?’ you asked, his battered up face causing your heart to squeeze painfully. ‘never been better.’ you somehow managed to crack a smile before letting out a sigh. a shout was heard from somewhere far behind you froze, the fear seeping in again. beside you, you felt shinya tense too. slowly, you raised your hand to touch his that was on your shoulder. he looked at you surprised as you gave him a soft smile, before intertwining your fingers into his. the two of you had been sent as decoys and unfortunately, the mission failed, causing the two of you to flee. except… the path ahead was a dead end. ‘aww, are you scared?’ shinya joked, smiling back at you as he crawled and sat down beside you, shoulders brushing. you laughed a little, feeling tears prick your eyes as you thought of how the two of you were actually doomed right now. ‘and if i am?’ you joked back, but in all honesty, it was the truth. you were scared. terribly scared. scared that this was truly your end. but what scared you more was the fact that shinya was never going to know about how much you cared for him. and you still didn’t have the courage to tell him, even now. suddenly shinya wrapped an arm around you, pulling you into his chest. you froze, not sure what he was doing. ‘i’m sorry we ended up like this.’ he whispered into your hair, wrapping another arm too around you to pull you into a hug. you too relaxed into his touch and hugged him back, burying your face into his chest as the tears fell freely now. ‘i’m so sorry i was not able to protect you.’ he whispered, voice broken. ‘what are you talking about, shinya? this is our life.’ you mumbled. ‘i’m just glad i’m here with you.’ silence followed your confession and for a minute you wondered if you were a bit too subtle. but then, shinya spoke. ‘me too. getting to meet you was one of the few beautiful things that ever happened in my miserable life.’ you blinked your tears away before looking up at shinya, only to find him smiling back softly at you, tears streaming down his face too. your breath caught your throat as you stared back at shinya hiragi, heart beating so loud that you were sure he could hear it too. then realising the situation you both were in, you laughed. ‘oh how cruel are the timings.’ you said, smiling at him as you felt your head go light with happiness. shinya cocked his head a little, before leaning into bury his head in the crook of your neck. ‘yes… i’m just happy you are there with me right now.’ gently you patted his back, feeling an unnatural calmness settle into you now that you had gotten the weight off your chest. ‘let’s be together for a very, very long time, shinya hiragi.’

[♡] osamu dazai as cinnamon girl. you stood in front of the hospital door, one arm raised but frozen in a knock, as you contemplated whether or not you should actually be doing this. he’s your colleague! you scolded yourself mentally, the raised hand balling into a fist so tight that you could feel your fingernails digging crescents into your palm. he’s just your friend and nothing more! besides, the agency as a whole decided it would be best if you went to visit him first since you were probably the only one whom dazai didn’t irritate or play pranks on. letting out a breath, you finally knocked on the door. the five seconds of silence that followed felt like eternity and maybe, you should just run away at the chance you have- ‘come in.’ dazai’s muffled voice caused you to jolt and inhale once, before you turned the door knob and entered the room. you scanned the room until your eyes met dazai’s smiling face. smiling. as if in response to his soft smile accentuated by the evening glow, your heart stuttered, and you momentarily forgot how to breathe. only when dazai’s smile grew, and he tilted his head and gave you a little wave did you snap out of your trance. smiling back nervously, you walked up to his bed and sat down on the empty chair beside it and placed the fruit basket on his nightstand. silence engulfed the two of you as your eyes flitted around the entire room, your heart beating rapidly as you looked everywhere except at him. then dazai whispered your name in his softest voice, causing you to snap back your gaze at him, stomach jumping at the way he had said your name. dazai smiled at you gently, eyes soft and patient, waiting for you like he always did. ‘osamu.’ you whispered back, cheeks heating up but this time, you didn’t break eye contact. dazai hummed in response, encouraging you to go on. ‘how- how are you?’ immediately, you cursed yourself. of course he’s not okay! he just got shot by a sniper! ‘i’m doing lovely, even better since you are here to see me now.’ he said with a small laugh. you felt your heart squeeze at his laugh, but when you remembered what a flirt he was, your fingers dug into your knees on which your hands were resting. ‘are those for me?’ dazai asked, turning his attention back to the fruit basket. ‘wh-what? ah, yeah. it is. we got your favourite fruits.’ you said as casually as you could, so that the extremely perspective man in front of you didn’t notice your behavior. you watched dazai grab an apple and bite into it, eyes closing as he enjoyed its taste. you studied his blissful expression, the way his face muscles were relaxed and the corners of his lips genuinely curved up to a small smile. you had always observed him so much till the point that you could now tell when he was faking it and when he wasn’t. and the latter was so rare that you found yourself smiling at his expression, happy that he wasn’t so guarded right now. ‘no, i really meant it.’ he said suddenly, opening his eyes to look at you with a serious expression. you knitted your eyebrows in confusion, not sure what he was talking about. ‘i am feeling much better now that you are here.’ he answered, looking at you with an expression you had never seen on him before. exposed. in your eyes, dazai was a beautiful man, both inside out. so right now to see him so vulnerable, so open, made you realise just how ethereal he was. ‘i always have.’ he continued and you opened your mouth to speak, but no sound came out. ‘and i know i always will.’ he said hurriedly, his voice suddenly hitching as a tint of worry clouded his expression. leaning forward, he gently slipped his hand into yours before whispering, ‘and i hope you too feel better around me.’ maybe it was his electrifying touch, or maybe it was just the pleading tone in his voice, begging you to let him know that this was okay but you found your voice back. ‘osamu. osamu, i- i like you. too’. you couldn’t tear your eyes away from dazai’s widened ones, but soon they softened as he smiled back at you. ‘me too. i like you so much.’

[♡] chuuya nakahara as summertime sadness. the stone below your bare feet was cold, almost icy and yet, you seemed unfazed by it. nor did the cool wind blowing against your bare arms cause you to shiver because the dread wrapping around your heart was colder than anything you had felt, the heaviness of it almost making you feel like you were drowning in the water flowing under your feet. you took another step towards the edge of the bridge, peering down at the water. will it be cold enough to numb my feelings- ‘y/n!’ you froze at the familiar voice, closing your eyes and letting out a sigh before turning towards the person. chuuya nakahara stood a few metres away from you, panic and worry etched all over his beautiful face. chuuya had always looked beautiful in your eyes, ever since you first saw him in the bar. but chuuya had looked exceptionally beautiful today, wearing his best suit and orange hair tied to a pony that cascaded over his shoulder. and you too, you didn’t look that bad either. you had picked your favourite red dress, excited for this special date where he had to ‘tell you something important.’ and you were excited because… you were in love with him. and you wanted to get to know him even better. so the thought that he was going to let you shoulder some of the heavyweight he obviously carried in his heart, even if it was just him telling you his job… you were ready for it. you were ready for anything if that meant getting to be with chuuya. or you thought so. the last thing you ever expected of the man you loved to say was that he worked for the port mafia. the port mafia, the very organisation that killed your parents at a young age and turned your life upside down. now you realised why he had always hesitated to tell you his job because this was one of the many secrets of yours you had indulged him in during your initial days of hanging out. and now tonight chuuya had decided to let you in on his darkest secret, probably hoping you wouldn’t view him any differently. and you wanted to. you really wanted to. you wanted to believe that the man you loved so much wasn’t any different even when he was on the job. that the side he showed you wasn’t a false image, an illusion created to torture you more. you wanted to trust chuuya and love him indiscriminately but it was hard pushing down the bile rising up your throat along with the memories that were resurfacing again. you smiled painfully at chuuya, indicating that he needn’t look so worried. ‘y/n, please can we talk about this?’ he begged, causing your heart to twist more painfully. ‘i- i’m not like that, i promise!’ he continued, the pleading in his voice hurting you till the point you had to squeeze your eyes shut. you knew he was right in a way. it wasn’t like he was the one who had killed your parents that day. and from the bits and pieces you had heard of his past, you were sure he too had gone through hell, if not worse, like you. and yet, you found it harder to forgive him for withholding this important information before you let yourself fall for him. ‘i know.’ you whispered, opening your eyes to look at him once again. ‘i know chuuya, i know.’ he looked at you hopefully, taking a step closer to you. no, chuuya, no! ‘i know you aren’t that cruel. or at least, i hope the man i fell in love with isn’t like that.’ his eyes widened in hope, and he took a few more steps closer before you shook your head. ‘but i- but i can’t forgive them, chuuya. i can’t forgive your family. and if i can’t like your line of work or the people you work with… how can i love you wholeheartedly chuuya?’ at this he froze, fear now taking over his features. tears stung your eyes, as your heart clenched very painfully, almost making it hard to breathe. ‘i love you chuuya. and i’ll miss you terribly. but this is where we part ways.’

[♡] guren ichinose as brooklyn baby. the first time you saw guren ichinose was when he was training in the grounds as you watched from the window of your classroom above, watching him getting beaten up by the kids. you rolled your eyes as you watched him go flying at shinya hiragi's punch. there was no way the heir of the ichinose clan was this weak, no matter how much of a useless branch they were. which could only mean one thing: he was absurdly strong and was hiding his strength for some reason. the second time you saw him was right after that, in the hospital wing of your school. you were coming from the nurse's office when you saw the mahiru hiragi run out of a room crying but before you could ask her what was wrong she had disappeared, leaving you with no choice but to peek into the room where she had come from. there you saw a bandaged guren ichinose sitting on the bed, a hand over his face as if to mask the true emotions he was feeling. then as though he felt your presence, he let his hand down and turned his head in your direction, causing you to freeze as your eyes met his. he has beautiful violet eyes, like the ones you could get lost in and stare at for hours, you thought, before snapping out of your daze when he offered you a faint smile. mumbling a 'get well soon', you ran out of there, hoping he hadn't noticed the heat that had crept up your cheeks at his action. the next time you met guren was much later. it was raining heavily outside and yet the students were practicing, but you decided to stay indoors. you were enjoying the silence of the classroom, accompanied by the soft hammering of the rain against the window when you heard someone walk into the class. turning to see who it was you felt your body tense, cheeks heating up again as guren met your eyes with a soft, tired smile. god, was he always this good looking? you managed to smile back before turning your attention back to the book, but you were fully aware of his presence as he walked towards the desk, before coming and sitting beside you. this wasn’t his place, was it? nonetheless, you felt the ichinose heir stare into your soul, causing you to tear your eyes from the book and give me a friendly, questioning look. he just shrugged, before pulling out a book of his own. that when you noticed his hair was still dripping wet, so you reached out for the towel from your bag and offered it to him. at first he just shrugged his head, now ignoring you, to which you narrowed your eyes at him and threw the towel on his head. he looked at you completely surprised to which you raised an eyebrow, before he let out a chuckle. you felt your heart stutter at the sound, so you turned your head away, pretending to stare at the rain instead. ‘thank you’, you heard him mutter so you turned back to look at him and reached out to take the towel from his extended hand. your fingertips brushed against his, and you saw redness dust his cheeks too, causing your heart to jump again. snatching the towel from him you looked away as he did too, both of you too overcome by the moment to speak. finally, after what felt like eternity, you felt guren slip a piece of paper under your elbow. you looked back at him but he was already scurrying out of the class. slowly opened the paper, you felt your stomach jump a little as you internally screamed. wanna come over for my band practice?

A/N || Presenting you guys... the lineup of anime men who drive me crazy. i love them so much (okay maybe guren not that much-) i'm not even sane about them atp. anyways, enjoy! i aboslutely loved LOVED writing this cus i've ldr always puts me in the fic mood lol

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