May 12
another reference lol sorry, this one is very personal to me tho, so uh yeah.. full ref below
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another reference lol sorry, this one is very personal to me tho, so uh yeah.. full ref below
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
How did you find out about your alters / figure out they weren’t just, idk, you I guess?
It was a longgggg process that lasted a couple years. Basically I always knew I had barriers in my memory and certain triggers would make "me" act in a different way and there were different parts of me that would respond to different situations and I would have little to no control and vague memories of the incidents, and I knew I had the ability to become someone else during super traumatic instances who could handle it better, but I was always kinda a daydreamy creative kid so I assumed it was that. I started really questioning it around 2022-2023 when I got into a really bad fight with the person I was dating at the time and I felt like a completely different person right before, I couldn't remember the rest of it, and the person told me it was like talking to someone completely different who knew/didn't know different things. I only get full long term blackouts when things are REALLY bad. In 2024 I started to hear what I thought were voices but they didn't go away with antipsychotics and the voices were linked to the same personas I felt while triggered. I thought I was fully losing it. I was also going through a lot of trauma at the time and losing big gaps again. I would lose a day and find messages I didn't remember sending or my hair/outfit would be totally different and the "voices" would be irritated if I tried to change it. I talked to a few system friends about it and I finally told my therapist everything who was like. Girl that's severe dissociative at best. And then we kinda uncovered each part/voice's role and what made them come out. I use the internal family system's model, so each part was chipped off of me when I needed it and has a specific purpose, whether it's holding memories, symptoms, or helping me function day to day. It's still a struggle tbh because the key thing about dissociative disorders is that they're subtle and largely happen without you really knowing. I've formed a couple new parts since then and a few faded because I no longer needed them to function, so I'm still figuring it out and only recently got back into therapy for real.
I just saw something really interesting about system members who have different physical disabilities to the host body.
Seems... normal, to me, with a bit of thought, I suppose. I think it would be very odd for an able bodied person to have a disabled alter, but it makes sense for disabled folks to.
I admit I did find it a bit of a strange thought upon first seeing it, because we're kinda the opposite? Even though our body is cripple³ none of us, internally, are disabled. We all walk and move normally as things are, hell, some of us have wings and one of us shapeshifts. It makes sense, because our disabilities are progressive and we didn't really struggle with them in childhood and early adolescence when we would've formed, and we haven't really had anyone split in a long time to my knowledge? So I feel like that tracks given the circumstances.
I'm curious though, for my fellow disabled plurals, do your headmates share the body's disabilit(y)/(ies)? Do they have any disabilities the body doesn't have? What're your experiences with this?
bored. low effort osdd blinkies made on blinkie cafe. flash warning.
idc about credit or whatever.
being a system is so funny because yea theres a fucking cat in my head
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Our friend knows about our system and he has always been extremely interested in the concept, as well as finding any way to support us.
He plays DND. And a few days ago, he comes to me and says "wanna see my new character"? Guys I cried. Genuinely. He made the most accurate and humanizing character that has DID.
The character has the host, a protector, and a persecutor. The persecutor gets a whole arc where he becomes less angry and heals. It's just. It's beautiful and it made me feel so seen and loved.
🌙
osdd 1a culture is growing to despise every blog you make. they all look and feel so gross. how could i have liked this theme, name, tagging system, whatever. why did i write like that? and it's rarely a sudden switch, it's like gradually drifting away from it and become slowly disconnected until it's repulsive to look at.
Catching ourselves in our feels cause there's so much history on our simply plural
