The Hazbin Hotel and Casino is a dangerous place, with secrets burned into the foundations. Charlie Morningstar and Vaggi have left the hotel unexpectedly in the midst of a fire in their penthouse.
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I had previously been under the impression that AZA accredited zoos and aquariums in the USA are more likely to take good care of animals than those that lack this accreditation. Is this incorrect?
It's... really complicated. The short answer is: maybe? Which doesn't help at all, I'm sure. I'm working on a huge project to try to quantify a bunch of accreditation stuff, so I don't want to say anything concrete from preliminary data, y'know?
Accreditation at a facility tells you, basically, what standards they are supposed to meet and what political group / industry club they're part of. But there's a lot of issues with all of the five zoological accrediting / certifying bodies where oversight during the accreditation cycles doesn't really exist in a functional way? Either reporting systems are in place that highly disincentivize reporting (because they aren't anonymous and could be tracked back to a staffer) or just don't have formal protocols for it all.
So being AZA accredited tells you the type of expectations they're trying to live up to, and what standards they met at the time they were inspected. I have some concerns about whether the standards for certain aspects of accreditation (like aesthetic stuff, not animal care) are really sustainable for duration given how you're constantly hearing about how zoos scramble to get all the little deferred things fixed prior to the next inspection. But, that's not necessarily an issue with the zoos, and more the program - and that's something that AFAIK happens with every accrediting group, not just AZA.
There's also an aspect of how the requirements of each accrediting program kind of... self select for the type of zoos they want? AZA's application and annual fees are incredibly high, which isn't necessarily a good use of money for many smaller facilities; they also require compliance with a lot of things not related to animal care and welfare, like internal staffing structure and facility aesthetics. Again, something that either smaller facilities just can't afford - do you spend money on the animals or on paving all your pathways? - or aren't interested in getting involved with because of how intrusive it is. So most of the AZA zoos you see are the bigger, well-funded ones with city-type aesthetics, because that's what who the program is set up to encourage to apply. (There are definitely exceptions to this, but find me a big city zoo that isn't AZA or in the process of becoming AZA).
To try to answer your questions, AZA zoos are more likely to be high quality because in order to be accredited, they have to have a certain amount of cash flow. Having more funding / income tends to make regular operating issues easier to solve. AZA zoos are certainly more heavily scrutinized every five years by their accrediting body than a group like ZAA, which is mostly focused on animal care / education / conservation and isn't going to meddle in a zoo's business operations. But AZA zoos aren't perfect. Most of them don't even meet all of the AZA standards completely at the time of inspection: there was an article a couple years back about how rare it was that Cheyenne Mountain Zoo met all of the AZA standards at the time of inspection - only the 4th zoo to do so in AZA's 50-something year history. (How that works is that zoos that don't meet all the standards but are close get provisionally accredited, and then have to fix or improve some stuff within the first year to keep it). And believe me, AZA zoos can and do have problems too - look at the embezzlement conducted by the previous leadership at Columbus, or the sexual assault and conduct issues with the Director at Henry Vilas. They're just less often covered in ways that are visible to the public.
Accreditation is a good indicator what a zoo intends to be, and what animal care / conservation ethos it participates in. It isn't, however, always a guarantee that the facility is good or that the animal care (or staff welfare!) is better than at an unaccredited or alternately-accredited place.
Chapters: 3/?
Fandom: Deep Rock Galactic (Video Game)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Characters: Driller (Deep Rock Galactic), Scout (Deep Rock Galactic), Gunner (Deep Rock Galactic), Engineer (Deep Rock Galactic), Mission Control (Deep Rock Galactic), various other dwarves
Additional Tags: various injuries and bug killings, Dwarven Shenanigans, the rockpox is horrifying, scout is VERY greenbeard. his team will not be, working within canon and game mechanics where I can, adding more tags later I guess, many workplace injuries (it's Hoxxes.)
Summary:
The Lithophage has both Hoxxes IV and the Deep Rock Galactic company in a scramble. A freshly recruited scout is assigned to Space Rig 17’s team to fill it out after the previous scout met his unfortunate end on a mission. Now Catten has to keep himself alive, keep his much more veteran team alive, keep Mangement happy with his performance, and keep a little secret…
-----
So I’ve started writing and posting again for the first time in ??? years. Posted the 3rd chapter today. This links to the 1st chapter
tags/warnings/et cetera all subject to change. This is a little-but-growing fic exploring “What if the Scout was very new to his job and got assigned to a team that’s basically all Gold promoted and everyone’s kinda a mess?”
Knowledge of thegame is helpful but not vital - DRG is a first-person co-op shooter where you explore a breathtakingly hostile planet full of valuable minerals and murderous bugs. We’re not given a lot of lore. I have sunk my teeth into what there is and am shaking it vigorously to see what might fall out
oh uh the lithophage (rockpox) is basically disease body horror and I will be prodding it occasionally but this is honestly more of a character-focused story. I have IDEAS I am just still in the setup phase. This is self-indulgent and I will take my time if it pleases me (but the chapter after next is where stuff starts picking up I promise)
Summary: “She’s nothing special, to be quite frank, but she is up to take the job. And you seem to make a habit of driving away all your assistants,” Besithia remarked pointedly.
“My dear friend, what a terrible thing you accuse me of!” The man with red-wine hair exaggerated. “The girls of the past simply didn’t,” he paused and mused, making sure to pick just the right word, “entertain me.”
Strange circumstances lead you to a strange relationship with the second most powerful man in the Niflheim Empire: Chancellor Ardyn Izunia. You have your own secret reasons for involving yourself with the empire. Will they align or contradict with your superior's equally ambiguous, private motivations?
A/N: This is a rewrite of a previous Ardyn/Reader fic that I never finished! I have suddenly been infused with muse for FFXV daydreams once again teehee. You can also support this work at my AO3 here! Thanks @keiko0 for making me feel like it was worth starting this up again!
Ship: Ardyn Izunia/F! Reader
Word Count: 3578
Next Chapter (to be added)
┕━☽【❖】☾━┙
“She’s nothing special, to be quite frank, but she is up to take the job. And you seem to make a habit of driving away all your assistants,” Besithia remarked pointedly.
“My dear friend, what a terrible thing you accuse me of!” The man with red-wine hair exaggerated. “The girls of the past simply didn’t,” he paused and mused, making sure to pick just the right word, “entertain me.”
“Well be careful with this one. I tire of giving up my research assistants for your antics.”
“Oh I surely will be careful and ever the gentleman. You have my word.” The imperial chancellor gave a bow. Each and every movement coming from him was dramatized in some way, as if the concept of authenticity was lost upon him.
“I do not know how much your word is worth in this matter,” Verstael sighed. “But nevertheless, allow me to show you where she waits to meet you,” the tired looking man, with hair already white, began to lead the way. A seemingly joyful man, at least at a surface-level glance, followed closely behind.
—
You sat in a lobby area, twiddling your thumbs. Anxiety pooled in your stomach as you awaited both the already acquainted top imperial researcher and Chancellor Izunia. How you—an outsider, a mere foreigner—were granted with such an arduous task was beyond you. But you would accept it no matter what, lest you lose your opportunity to further ingrain yourself into the empire. ‘A necessary nuisance ,’ you regularly reminded yourself when you felt like quitting. Only within Gralea could you find what you needed to find.
A familiar voice calling out your name snapping you out of your thoughts and causing you to raise your head as two men made their way over to you. Quickly on your feet, you gave a deep bow. “Research Chief Besithia and Chancellor Izunia,’ you began to straighten your posture. “It is a pleasure and honor to speak with you.” You were able to play the role of a faithful subordinate convincingly, even when it went against your true sentiments.
The Chancellor said your name to himself, dragging it out, considering it before taking your hand in his. “I insist, dear, that the pleasure is all mine.” With that, he planted a light kiss on the back of your palm then released it.
Your cheeks unwillingly flushed, but you made sure to control your expression, determined to not ruin relations on day one. “Thank you, Chancellor Izunia.”
“Please, please, enough with the titles and pleasantries,” he waved his hand. “You may just call me Ardyn.”
“If that is what you wish, then I shall oblige. Ardyn,” saying his name was an afterthought. No higher ranking individuals in the empire allow one to use their first names only, so it was nothing short of odd to have a name without honorifics pass your lips.
Besithia commented as he turned on his heel to walk away, “Well, I kept my word. I expect you to play nice.” You weren’t sure who the order was intended for. “I have much work to return to, so I shall take my leave.”
“Thank you for taking the time, Research Chief Besithia,” again you bowed out of practiced respect.
After watching his figure disappear down a different hallway, Ardyn turned to you. “Come, my dear, we have much to attend to as well,” he said sweetly with a smile. Though you said yes without question, you felt an enormous pressure from the man’s overwhelming facade of kindness. It made you feel small in a place you otherwise felt little to nothing. If there was one thing you found out from working for the Niflheim Empire, it was that no one of power was kind and genuine. Even still, you decided to be grateful that the man at least acted as such, an effort none of the others you’ve met made towards you.
With him leading the way, the two of you eventually arrived in a room with a little reception area and another door that you assumed was his actual office space. Gesturing around he notified you that this was to be your space, you gave the chancellor a nod to indicate that the information had been received. “As for your actual job,” he circled back over to you, “it will be handling and organizing any paperwork that both comes to me and that I am submitting to others.”
“Understood.” You bowed forward.
“Ah!” The mischievous glint in his golden eyes had you stepping a foot backwards. “It is also your responsibility to keep me amused.”
“I… I shall do my best, Ardyn.”
With a large smile, much like a cheshire cat, he placed his hand upon your cheek. “I shall be counting on you, my dear. Let us have a fruitful relationship, hm?” Despite the pet names and pleasant expression, there was a coldness in the way he held himself that gave you a subtle shiver.
After a quick tour of the little space and explanations on how things are to function smoothly, the chancellor turned to you. “Not scared off yet?” You shook your head in response to the playful question. “Then I shall expect to see you on the morrow!”
“Of course, Chancel--”
“Ah, ah!” The older man tutted and placed a finger to your lips. “I told you to use my name, dear,” he reminded you of his earlier request.
“My apologies, Ardyn. I am still getting used to the idea of such colloquial language with my superiors.”
“How could I not forgive such a beautiful woman,” Ardyn shrugged to himself. “Just don’t make it a habit, hm?” With a wink and a wave, he sent you off for the day.
Quickly striding down the hallways, you returned to the dormitories provided to the lower level employees such as yourself. Your room was small with few belongings: a notebook, a warmly colored lamp you chose for yourself, and a modest shelf filled with an array of books. Average as it was, it was a space of your own, and that was enough. You rubbed your forehead, feeling the presence of an oncoming migraine, and your thoughts did nothing to remedy the situation.
You were not excited to begin working with Chancellor Izunia. His touch and flirtations left you feeling uneasy, not that the physical contact from others would be any more comfortable. Staying in your place under Besithia seemed more ideal each passing minute, even if he chastised you harshly when you weren’t working fast or hard enough (in his old eyes). Dwelling on what would be better was pointless now though, so with a deep breath, you let such thoughts wash away. Before the full impact of your head pain could manifest, you turned off the lights and tucked yourself in. You were unsure what to actually expect from your new job, but that was a thought for the following morning.
—
8:00 a.m. was the agreed time for work to start; even so, you arrived at 7:45 a.m. To be on time is to be late, and to be early is to be on time. You had not expected Chancellor Izunia to be there yet, but as time ticked on to past 9:00 a.m., you began to feel anxious. There was scant work to keep you busy, leaving you to idly play with the pendant you adorned yourself with daily and your own thoughts.
You jumped a little in your seat and gulped as the door suddenly swung open. Before looking at or greeting you, he turned to place his fedora upon the hanging rack placed near the door.
“Oh my,” his—begrudgingly admitted—sultry voice called your name. “Did I startle you? My sincere apologies,” Ardyn gave you a short bow. “And it appears that I am tardy on top of it. I hope you can forgive this inconsiderate man.”
“It is really no problem,” you fervently shook your head. “I was merely beginning to worry for your wellbeing as time ticked by. I am relieved to see you in full health.” You gave him a small smile and nod.
Ardyn put his hand upon his heart and sighed, “You are too good to me, my dear.” He narrowed the distance, looking upon the pile of completed documents. “And an efficient worker it seems.” He appeared to be pleased with your work. “I’ll need to find other ways to keep you occupied,” a devilish smile was thrown your way.
“I am capable of handling whatever you may hand my way.” It was a confident statement coming from you who was typically reserved, but you did believe in your abilities. It was one of the few things you did not feign here.
The man scratched his stumble and pondered. “Hm, I wonder about that.” For the briefest moment, you saw his eyes darken as he looked upon you. “But for now, I must start my own work day and make up for the time I have missed.” Now behind you as he walked to his office, you felt a large hand ruffle your hair. The unexpected contact caused you to involuntarily flinch, the reaction earning a chuckle before the door clicked close.
Perseverance. It was going to be the only way you’d make it through these newly assigned jobs and the touchy imperial chancellor, but by the Astrals, you were willing to do whatever it took to get what you came for. You internally affirmed your goals, ensuring you would not falter. All you had to do was stay low and appear compliant, a task that was going to be much harder than you could have ever predicted.
—
A couple weeks had passed since you had begun working for Chancellor Izunia and you found yourself growing more comfortable with his flamboyant personality. If nothing else, you could tolerate it. There were even moments where you found yourself giggling at his little antics, to which he’d react with a self-satisfied smirk. One of his favorite actions as of late was placing his hat upon your head instead of the hanger. You were grateful that these flirty gestures and comments were at least coming from an attractive man, not someone slimy and entirely not your type—which you weren’t quite sure what would even constitute “your type.” You shuddered to imagine Besithia acting as Ardyn does.
It had taken a couple days and evenings, but you finally finished the paperwork—sifting through what you’d bring to his attention, shredding whatever elset, putting official seals on anything that required it. All simple things, but it seemed far too much for someone who didn’t even appear to take the politics seriously. Though who were you to judge when you hardly took the work seriously yourself?
A sigh passed your lips, knowing that it would already be dark outside. It was a go to work, go to sleep day. You placed a soft knock on the Chancellor’s office door.
“Come in, love,” he invited with a sing-song voice.
“Ardyn,” you gave a short bow, “everything you need is ready for you.” You explained the gist of what you completed, hoping it’d make his busy work easier.
“Thank you. You continue to impress me everyday,” he said your name with a warm expression.
“That’s the goal, right?” You offered up the same energy. “I know it’s a bit late, and I wouldn’t want to keep you any longer, but is there anything else you’d like from me before I take my leave?”
Ardyn closed his eyes and leaned back in his seat, obviously considering your request. “Dinner!”
“Eh?” There was no chance of you holding back the shock on your face.
“Your boss is requesting that you share dinner with him,” he chirped. All you could do was blink at him for a few moments.
“I actually had some leftovers I have to finish so they don’t, uh, go bad,” you made an excuse.
“Hm, quite a predicament we find ourselves in,” Ardyn stated, scratching his stubble. “How about this then!” He excitedly put a finger up as if having an ‘Aha!’ moment. “Tomorrow is our day off, yes?” You slowly nodded your head with a quirked eyebrow. “Then we will go out for dinner—a nice dinner—tomorrow night!”
“I…” You had no excuses to deny the Chancellor this time, and his satisfied expression indicated he was well aware. “If you truly wish to share a meal with your humble assistant tomorrow night, I shall accept.”
A sly smile graced Ardyn’s lips, “Wonderful, I haven’t had anything to look forward to in quite some time. We can meet here in the evening.” He laughed before waving you away, “That’ll be all for today, my dear. See you tomorrow,” his golden eyes stared at you then gave you a wink.
You bowed before bidding him goodnight and rushed to your room. Non-work related conversations with the man always left your brain feeling drained as you tried to ascertain what motivations he had under that carefree facade. You crashed unceremoniously onto your bed, not bothering to eat anything, though you technically did have leftovers that were going to spoil. You couldn’t help but feel a twinge of disappointment in your chest at the knowledge of attending an obligatory dinner as opposed to researching your own interests, per se.
What were you to wear tomorrow? What conversation points did you have to discuss? Where were you even going to eat? Such questions eventually lulled you into a restless sleep.
—
Though not a very satisfying one. You woke up in the late afternoon to a rat’s nest of hair and dried drool caked to one side of your mouth. ‘Maybe I should show up like this,’ you snorted but your better judgment told you to clean up. It wouldn’t be any good to lose your current position, it’s already difficult to get the information you’re looking for as is. You slinked off to the showers, making sure the temperature was as hot as your skin could take before stepping in. The shower routine you had wasn’t too long, yet you still sat there in contemplation long after you were done.
Travels all around Eos led you to no further information on what you were seeking—information about the lost and long-forgotten Astral you heard stories of as a child; stories that were deeply rooted in your existence, in your heirloom—the necklace. Eventually, the only place you hadn’t checked was Niflheim. And so here you sat, in the last place you could hope to check.
By the time you stepped out, your skin was raw from the hot water, but hey, at least you were clean now; however the clock was ticking against you, you slept in far too late and showered far too long. “Ah shit,” scolding yourself, you quickly got to work on finishing up your appearance.
It was nothing special, frankly speaking. You didn’t want to look like you tried too hard for your kinda-but-not-really dinner date with your superior. Donned in a black, sleeved, and laced dress accented with gold, you accessorized only with your pendant and a simple pair of earrings. The only styling your hair received was a decent blow drying. Nodding as you checked the mirror last time, you headed towards the office, but not to work this time.
Truthfully, you expected the Chancellor to be late like he often is at work, so your heart skipped a beat to see him waiting. “Apologies for making you wait for me,” you bowed once you finally reached him.
Taking you by the chin, Ardyn lifted your head up and gave one of the signature smiles, “Not a problem. I would be happy to wait a thousand years for a beauty such as yourself,” he kissed the back of your hand. Though it was nothing out of the ordinary for him to say, there was something about it that felt chilling. “I see you’re as lovely as ever,” he offered as a compliment.
“I see you’re looking… the same as ever,” you said with a hint of amusement. He wore his typical dark, layered outfit, though you were a bit relieved to see that he ditched the fedora for the night. ‘I quite prefer his wine-red hair uncovered,’ you admitted to yourself.
“Apologies,” he chuckled, “Believe it or not, I don’t own very many outfits.” Seeing how eccentric Ardyn was, you did believe him and nodded as confirmation. “Well then,” he said your name in a rather sultry way that made you blush, “Shall we get going?” The chancellor offered his arm to you, which you timidly took.
An obviously luxurious red convertible waited in front of the building. After opening the door and ushering you into your seat, you couldn’t deny your surprise when Ardyn sat in the driver's seat.
Of course the Chancellor would notice your expression, leading him to question the reason behind it. You decided to answer honestly. “I suppose I’m just a little shocked that you prefer to drive yourself as opposed to a chauffeur or something fancy.”
A low chuckle—one that almost sounded genuine—passed his lips. “That’s fair. Most of the other officials would prefer to sit back, but I actually quite enjoy a drive. You could call it a hobby of mine.” It was far more modest than you’d expect from the ever dramatic Ardyn Izunia, but perhaps that was what made it refreshing.
After a short drive filled with small talk, the two of you arrived at a low-lit, rather intimate restaurant. It was intimidating to an extent, you’d never bothered to go somewhere nice. Your life had been about eating quickly, eating cheap, and only eating when necessary. “I don’t know if I belong at a nice place like this,” you remarked with a laugh as the two of you were seated.
“Nonsense, it is my duty to treat my ever faithful assistant to something out of the norm,” Ardyn gestured around the room.
“Treating?” You opened your eyes wide. “That won’t be necessary. I can pay for it. Though I appreciate the thought,” you put on a smile.
“Absolutely not! I am the one who invited you after all.”
“Well then next time I have to pay!” You quickly put your fist over your mouth and cleared your throat, realizing what you said and the implications of it.
“You are one of the most entertaining humans I have ever met,” Ardyn stifled a laugh. “But fine, if you are to ask me out, I will allow you to pay.”
“Ever the gentleman.” You decided to not question the ‘human’ remark for now.
The chatter the two of you kept over dinner was rather innocent and not professional, but not overly colloquial either. There were, however, multiple incidences of him reaching over the small table to get touches of your hand in. To be honest, you weren’t too shocked at the gesture, but it did garner a bit of shock out of you when he instead clutched your pendant between his fingers.
“Such an interesting little thing,” the Chancellor pointed out. “He examined the green crystal, the designs within, and the metal twining with fervor. “You wear it daily.”
You nodded. “It is very special to me, it is all I have of my parents,” a soft smile came to your face. “It was actually an anniversary gift to my mother, but after their death, it ended up in my hands.” You paused before continuing, “It is the only earthly possession I truly care for—my most precious treasure.”
“To care for something is quite a gift,” Ardyn spoke absentmindedly almost as if you weren’t there, but you hummed affirmatively anyways. The waiter brought the check, breaking the man out of what appeared to be deep thought. It was a fast transaction, and finally, the night was winding down to an end.
Ever the chivalrous man, Ardyn walked you to your living spaces. “Thank you for tonight,” you bowed deeply. “It was an honor to spend alone time with the Chancellor,” the pleasantries slipped from your lips. It was a shock to find his fingers flicking your forehead, and you recoiled at the sensation.
“I thought I told you long ago not to act so, hmm, how to say… kiss-assy with me just because you work for me,” the man rarely swore so you couldn’t fight the full smile and laugh that was drawn from you. He seemed pleased to have garnered the reaction.
“Sorry,” you managed to get out after another laugh.
“Well, dearest, it appears the night out is over. I thoroughly enjoyed the experience.” You nodded in agreement. “I shall see you once the work week begins,” the ever cheeky Ardyn leaned down to give a kiss to your forehead where he had previously flicked it before quickly turning and waving goodbye.
As you tried to sleep, your face heated everytime you thought of the peck. You were aware that the majority of his flatteries were empty, but it still gave you butterflies. You had never let anyone share contact like that with you after all. A deep sigh rose out of you, you had to brush off all the strange feelings before work the work week restarted; however, you didn’t know if Ardyn would ever let you do so. The man certainly knew how to press buttons you didn’t know existed.
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“I love you, okay?” Levi softly whispered. Their foreheads were pressed together as he noticed a trace of inquietude darkening Eren's beautiful green eyes. “I’ll be there the whole time.”
