#ocapp

"Every mission is important, according to her!" John exclaimed.

"This one's easy. Alexei already took off to take the lead."

A collective groan left everyone's mouths.

"Of course he did," muttered Yelana who closed her eyes. "Ten minutes. I want ten minutes to take a nap. Is that too much to ask for, y/n?"

"Guys, it's not y/n's fault," Bucky cut in, earning your appreciative nod. "Valentina works her as much as she works us."

God knew that y/n had to deal with Valentina's crap almost as much as the team did. You were the 'new avengers' publicist and more than that, Valentina's coordinator for just about everything. Anything that had to be done went through you, and you always got it done.

"Minus the deadly fighting stuff," you added. "But I do work very hard, thanks Bucky. I'll see you in a bit?"

Bucky nodded at you. "We'll be in the meeting room in ten."

You smiled. "Thank you." She eyed the rest of the team before leaving.

As soon as you were gone, the rest of the team started groaning again, throwing multiple jabs at Bucky for his interference.

"You always do this!" John exclaimed.

"Stop dragging us into your love life!" Ava's muffled cry was perfectly heard by Bucky.

"Seriously, Bucky, if you like her, take her out on a date. Don't give us more work to do just to get on her good side!" Yelena gave Bucky a stink-eye.

"What?" Bucky looked at all of them annoyed. "She just told us that we had work—"

"That's her job, she's always going to tell us we have more work," said John, deadpanning Bucky. "But we would really appreciate it if you got on her good side without dragging the rest of us into it."

Ava raised a silent thumbs up beside him.

"Okay, you're all stupid and we have work to do. Now hurry up," Bucky got up and walked past them, kicking Ava's leg that was dangling off the couch.

She pulled the pillow off her face, revealing glaring eyes, and sat up. "Seriously? We don't get those 10 minutes?"

"Let's go!" Bucky called.

True to your word, Valentina had arrived within the next 2 minutes and was waiting for the team in the conference room. Bucky could hear her start complaining to y/n about their tardiness and how incompetent it was from your part.

"Knock it off, Valentina, we're here," he said as he walked (faster) into the room. He hated hearing Valentina talk down to you. She liked to think that everything could be done perfectly without you when everyone knew that by herself, Valentina couldn't do three things in a row without messing up.

Bless your heart, though, you never complained. You were used to it and usually brushed off the snide comments.

Bucky, however, never forgot each comment. It was why he always tried following your instructions and plans on the first go, why he always made sure that everyone else never gave you a hard time for all the work you asked from them. You were the sweetest, most professional person he had ever known and you only deserve the best.

So…maybe he did like you a little bit. He thought he was a little more subtle about it but according to the others, he wasn't. Still, you never seemed to catch on so maybe he wasn't all that obvious.

Valentina presented their newest mission, which in truth wasn't that bad as the one they had just come from. It was a simple collection mission with an estimated short time duration. They would be back in two days tops. No one was happy about it but they each went to shower and get ready.

You were in the living room again going over a few details on your tablet when Bucky re-emerged freshly changed. You looked up from the couch with a kind smile.

"You're looking better," you remarked, "Sorry you have to hop on another plane again."

"Not your fault," Bucky said, coming over to you. You straightened up and shifted to face him once he sat down. "I don't think you're in charge of the mission schedules."

"The rest of the team seems to think I am," you said, scrunching your nose. "Trust me, if I was, I'd be spreading them out way better than Valentina."

"They're idiots, trust me," Bucky said, and you chuckled softly. He smiled at that. You were very pretty when you laughed.

"If you need anything, let me know," you said after a while. "I'm making the weekly order tomorrow. Bob's requested more frozen fruit for smoothies. He's really into them right now. I won't tell you what Yelena requested."

Bucky smiled with you and agreed it was best to keep that request a secret. "What about you?" he asked suddenly and caught you off guard.

"Huh?"

"What about you? What do you need this week?"

You blinked at the question and chuckled out of sheer confusion. "I don't really — I don't really make personal orders. Val would kill me if I used 'Avenger' money for my own needs."

"But you're here like 24 hours anyways. You should get what you need and leave it here. What's your favorite go-to snack?"

"It doesn't really matter, Bucky…"

"Yes, it does. C'mon," he gave you a little gentle nudge on your side, "first thing that pops into your head. What is it?"

You gave it very little thought, honestly. "The apple-cinnamon fig bars from the Nature's bakery brand."

"See? You should add those to the list!"

"I'm-I'm not doing that, Bucky," you insisted, "Valentina would literally kill me."

"Over fig bars? You've stayed at the tower anyways when we're all working late."

"Exactly, for work," you reminded, though memories of late night movies with the team and take-out dinners didn't exactly fit with the 'work' idea. "Usually anyways…"

Bucky knew what you meant and chuckled. "C'mon y/n, you and I both know that this team — Valentina herself — would not be able to function without your hands."

You flushed and chuckled, this time very, very nervously. "I mean…that might be a little bit of an exaggeration. I can't do half the things you guys can. Not even a quarter of it, actually."

"Brains over bronze any day," said Bucky clearly. "And you definitely have the brains, y/n. Don't let Valentina tell you otherwise."

Your flush grew stronger and you found the only way to fight it was by ducking your gaze and focusing on your tablet. "Thanks, Bucky."

The sound of footsteps and indistinguishable murmuring broke the moment. Bucky and y/n looked over just as the team started coming in. Soon, the team was gone and the tower was empty again.

These were, as you called it before, 'slow days'. You wouldn't say it out loud but you came to miss the chaos that the new Avengers typically brought on a daily basis. Whether it was the usual arguments between Ava and John, Alexei's constant pushes for "more advertisements", Ava and Yelena finding ways to ruin John's day, or poor Bob trying and failing to keep the peace amongst them — it was always chaotic, never boring.

The slow days were just that — slow. This was the time where Valentina pushed you even more to have things ready for when the team returned. These were the 'behind the scenes', if you will.

Unbeknownst to the team, these were also the days you spent the most time in the Tower. You definitely slept over sometimes, which was why Bucky's suggestion of adding your own personal things to the list was more present in your head than ever.

You would love some snacks right now, but God knew how much John would explode if you touched any of his things. Ironically, he was the one who ordered the most snacks. Bob, on the other hand, wouldn't mind if some of his things went missing. You would replenish it in the next weekly order.

~ 0 ~

The team was in and out of the tower after their last mission. They spent possibly about a day or two before they were shipped off again. You, unfortunately, missed out on seeing them.

When you finally returned, you found Bob reading a book in the lounge room.

"How fortunate we are to see you out of your little cave," you joked on your way in.

He peered up from his book with a grin on his face. "It's not that sunny today." He made a slight nod at the windows. He preferred to put himself up in a sunny spot when he read. It made things feel less…cooped up.

You glanced at the windows covered in rain. It had not stopped raining the whole day, making things feel about ten times more gloomy. "Yeah, I know," you sighed.

"Where've you been?" Bob said, propping himself up more on the couch. "The team was here for a bit, Bucky asked for you."

"He did?" You tried not to let the excitement be so evident on your face. To help, you made a beeline for the kitchen. "Did he, uh, need something?"

Whether or not your efforts of casualness were decent, Bob didn't poke at it. He just answered simply. "Think he wanted to tell you something."

"Me?" You came up to the cabinets for a drink. That was up for grabs for sure. "About the team?"

With the cabinet doors blocking your face, you missed Bob shrugging from the couch.

"I don't know. I didn't really ask. Sorry!"

"It's not your fault, Bob. If it was important, he would've left me a…message…"

Bob noticed the sudden pause in your words. He tried peering as much as he could on the couch without falling but he still couldn't catch your face. "Something wrong?"

You had frozen for a moment, eyes catching the familiar green snack box. Apple-cinnamon fig bars. Your hand reached out for the box and pulled it off the shelf. "Bob…" You closed the cabinet doors, "Did you order these?"

Bob saw the box in your hands and immediately shook his head. "No, why?"

"No reason…" You set the box down on the counter and stared at it for a long while.

Bob thought you were acting weird but he didn't want to be rude and point it out. He picked up his book and pretended to read, his eyes glancing up from it every second or so to keep watching you.

You picked up the box again and turned it around. Your name was written on it in a black marker. You recognized the handwriting instantly. You had definitely not ordered them, but you had an inkling suspicion of who had.

You felt the stupid grin spreading across your face. Something warm blossomed in your chest at the same time. It was dumb as hell, feeling like this over a little box with 6 bars inside.

So what if Bucky ordered them for you?

So what if it meant that he had thought about you in the short period he had returned from his mission?

So what?

Bob, who had been staring at you from the top of his book silently, finally gathered the courage to call your name (gently). "You okay?"

With a face on fire, you met his gaze and nodded fervently. "Yup! Aha! Just — you want a snack, Bob? A drink? A—?"

"Pretty sure I probably shouldn't be drinking…" Bob reminded her awkwardly, prompting you to enter a stammering phase.

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♡ DAY 1 ⸻ realizations

( FEBRUARY 8 ) maybe they were struck by lightning, or it slowly built over time, but what did that 'oh. oh.' moment look like?

♡ DAY 2 ⸻ love languages

( FEBRUARY 9 ) how do they express their love, or how do they want to be loved in return?

♡ DAY 3 ⸻ inspired by

( FEBRUARY 10 ) what tv shows, songs, books, and so on have inspired you while creating this pairing? what has helped shape them and their relationship into what it is?

♡ DAY 4 ⸻ adaptation

( FEBRUARY 11 ) from page to screen, how does their relationship translate? make an edit for the important moment(s) in their story.

♡ DAY 5 ⸻ little things

( FEBRUARY 12 ) what do they like about their partner? what traits make them fall in love over and over again? make an edit for the little things they notice about each other.

♡ DAY 6 ⸻ role swap

( FEBRUARY 13 ) if their positions were changed, would things still be the same? imagine them in the shoes of their partner, how would that play out?

♡ DAY 7 ⸻ one true pairing

( FEBRUARY 14 ) there's just always going to be that one ship that's a little more meant to be.

Her mind reached out for him at first. Over and over she took hold of him, sometimes for just a moment, others for a while. Images of himself flashed in front of his own eyes. It took hours, but finally she seems to be resting. 

At first he fought it, fearing he’d see what happened in Russia and in the lab. She spared him from the worst of the gore, but she was conscious then. Eddie fought to keep himself free of her nightmares. 

But then he saw her walking out to the avocado tree, those long legs naked as always. Sunlight danced along her skin, warming her in a protective cocoon. He could feel her safety by herself, beautiful but lonely. Talking to herself because she didn’t have anyone else. So he let her take him.

Eddie gasped when he saw himself the way Zero did for the first time. He barely looked like a human being, and still she checked him for a pulse. He saw what she did the first time she laid eyes on him. That rumpled mess of bones and torn skin. His broken guitar that she couldn’t fix… the joint she took out of his pocket, laughing while she did so, cataloging his belongings in case the stranger before her woke up… the desperate fight to get him back to the Haven.

He saw his own body on her bed, having nightmare after nightmare, but it didn’t stop her from helping him, though she worried about the damage. Will he even be a person after this? He watched her spend nights brushing the hair off his forehead and whispering to him.

It’s okay, Edward. You’re safe now. I’m going to get you home. I promise.

Promise.

Zero poured over his tattoos, her mind churning with ideas for what they might mean. Her strong fingers held his weak body as he wasted away, wondering how someone with such an affinity for pain for the sake of art could end up in a place like the Darkness. He made a mental note to tell her what they all meant when she woke up.

She smoked his own joint a few days after she found him, irritated that he wouldn’t wake. She waved it under his nose. Nothing. She called it ditchweed and tore her way through three days worth of leftovers while she sat on the edge of the bed, insulting him like it would wake him up.

Fuck you, Munson. She said that a lot. She stomped her feet like a child each time he didn’t reply, and all it did was make him chuckle.

He woke up, he felt the joy she had when she laid eyes on him conscious. She was so happy she wasn’t going to have to bury him. It sparked a slew of other memories since he’d woken up. Ones that made her smile, ones that made her blush. 

The first time he called her sweetheart, he’d felt the flip her heart did in her chest. Every time he made her laugh she felt her blood pressure pick up and the heat rush to her face. He had no idea he affected her as much as she did him.

He saw himself through her eyes. The way she cared about him. Eddie hadn’t any doubt that Zero cared for him, or that she liked him. He’d felt the emotion between them when he kissed her, and now through her mind reaching to him for comfort, he felt the tentative spark of love ignite in her chest when he started singing Danny’s Song, when before it was just an ember waiting to hit flint and steel. The kiss just fanned it into a much larger flame.

Finally, she let his mind go as she truly fell asleep. Everything went quiet, even quieter than usual. Though Zero had slept on his chest every night for a month and a half, tonight her body completely relaxed. 

The pain seemed unbearable at first, a soul-deep agony that Eddie thought would surely kill him. He hadn’t realized just how much she’d been sparing him. Sure, when she slept it usually came back but this was different. For a moment, Eddie couldn’t breathe, every nerve in his body firing on all cylinders to find a way to fight through it. 

And then it seemed to crest. Just as he was about to cry out for help, for Zero to please make it stop, air filled his lungs. His muscles slowed their twitching and his mind seemed woozy with the sudden rush of blood flowing easily once more. 

It was different than when Zero suppressed his nerves. He could feel the difference in the pain. She no longer controlled it since she was so deeply asleep, and still he survived. 

Progress.

Eddie manages to slip out from under her, quickly tucking his pillow under her arm for her to hold on to in his absence. The sun washes over her cheekbone and nose, kissing her skin gently for him. Eddie would rather look into her dark eyes himself, but he’s grateful she’s finally resting. 

In the last week or so, he’d noticed a change in her. As he grew stronger, Zero seemed weary, more weighed down than normal. She’d been sleeping longer than normal, but it was restless as always, and she always woke seeming even more tired than before. 

She seemed to come alive again when he’d kissed her. Eddie touches his lips as the sweet memory, wondering idly if he’ll ever get to do that again. Last night’s revelations were heavy and complicated, and Eddie spent all night going over them in his mind.

Zero was a killer. He’d always known that deep down. Dustin and the rest of the kids had told him a lot about Eleven and what she’d done and been forced to do. Zero was more practiced and seemingly stronger than her, so it only made sense she’d done at least what Eleven had, if not worse.

The vision of Henry reaching for her so desperately clawed at his mind. The tears that flowed down his face were real, the fear for his sister clearer than anything he’d seen in a long time. Eddie knew Henry had always been evil, no matter how kind he was to Zero, and a part of him knew it started as an act for him. Henry was likely just as surprised as Eddie that he loved Zero so deeply. His fear of being left alone by her was real… as much as Zero’s fear of leaving him again.

Eddie resigned himself to staying in the Upside Down with Zero. One day he’d convince her to come back to Hawkins with him, but for now he wrote out his thoughts and worries in the notebook he had stashed in the Eddie box. There were things he wanted to remember when they went back, and keeping the book was key.

Guilt seeped in his belly for keeping this from her, but she refused to hear anything about leaving… about leaving Henry. To her, leaving his abuse was tantamount to abandoning him. Her desire to keep her promise was literally eating her alive. 

Sitting on the front porch so as not to wake her, Eddie scrawls his chicken scratch across the pages. Clem sat at his feet as the sun rose, warming his skin. The nights were never cold here in the Haven, just cool, sometimes even warm. It was May in Hawkins, summer returning to the little rural town.

Where were his friends? The kids would be sophomores in the fall, but for now were they going to the pool together? Enjoying their summer? Were Steve and Robin still at Family Video? Was Nancy still worrying about her future with Jonathan? 

Had Corroded Coffin found a new lead guitarist? 

That one stung. Eddie’s heart clenches tightly at the thought of being replaced so quickly. Of people forgetting him, but if they did he wouldn’t be surprised. Eddie knows he hadn’t done enough in his life to leave a mark on any of them. The only one who misses him is probably Wayne.

Uncle Wayne. The man who raised him. 

A memory surfaces, one he thinks about a lot, especially since he’s been stuck in the Upside Down. 

Sitting in a dirty police station, Eddie sips on a paper cup with Coke in it. His cheeks are sticky with tears, his chest heaving with the effort of holding back his cries. 

Calvin Powell sits next to him on a creaky bench, so large and imposing to an eight year old Eddie, though he was nothing but a beanpole. He hasn’t said much, just gave Eddie some chips and soda from a place in town. Eddie could hear his coked out father screaming from somewhere in the back of the police station, ranting and raving about nothing in particular. 

“Your uncle’s on his way,” Powell reminds him every time Eddie flinches at the sound of Edward’s voice. This time he adds, “When was the last time you saw him?”

Eddie shrugs, “I dunno.”

“What about your mom?”“Died a few months ago.”

Powell nods, looking down at his hands. He sniffs hard and sighs before saying, “You’re in good hands, Eddie. Wayne’s a stand up guy. Always has been.”

Eddie nods, but doesn’t really believe him. Anyone related to Edward the Asshole can’t be much better. His mom was the only good one, and he chalked that up to not being a blood relation to anyone but him.  

“Where is he?” Eddie hears a gruff voice coming from the front. He and Powell lean forward on the bench to see over the front desk. “Where’s Eddie?”

Eddie didn’t really remember Uncle Wayne. He remembered he was tall and quiet, unlike Edward. He always gave Eddie a hard candy and a soft knuckle under the chin when Edward dropped him off, but that had been a few years now. 

Powell stands and waves Wayne through, and he doesn’t hesitate to storm past the secretary at the front. Wayne stomps his way toward them, and Eddie can’t help but shrink behind Powell. Maybe his father’s anger was shared with his brother. Maybe Eddie was in trouble.

Tall and tanned from outside work, Wayne stops short when he sees Eddie’s tear-stained cheeks… and his black eye. He sighs and gets to his knee before him. Cigarette smoke and motor oil wafts from his uncle. He reaches out, pulling back slightly when Eddie flinches, then cups his cheek and takes in his bruise. 

“You okay?” he asks, that deep voice making Eddie nervous. His father sounded like that.

Lip quivering, Eddie nods. Wayne pulls him close, and when his lips press into the top of Eddie’s head, he bursts into tears. Wayne lifts him like a baby though Eddie thought he was much too old to be held this gently. 

“You don’t ever have to see him again, son,” Wayne whispers against him. “You’re gonna live with me now. Everything’s gonna be okay.”

Edward yells again, followed by scuffling and other voices. Eddie just wants to curl in a ball and fade away. 

“Promise?” Eddie asks quietly, his voice trembling.

“Promise.”

Eddie’s hand clamps tightly over his jaw, desperately holding back tears at the thought of his uncle. He saved him that day, and Eddie threw all that away. Years of doing stupid shit like selling pot and stealing cars and Wayne tried to steer him away from all of it. 

How many times had Eddie sat on that creaky bench in the years after Edward went to prison, handcuffed and waiting for Wayne to bail him out just like his father? He might have his mother’s eyes, but Eddie looked like Edward through and through, given a second chance only to throw it away for his own childish attempt to rebel. 

What did Wayne think about all this? That question ran through Eddie’s mind nearly every day since he woke up in the Haven. On the run for satanic murder, a criminal just like his father… Wayne must have finally given up on him. 

Do you cry for yourself? Screech’s voice booms in his skull, pulling Eddie out of his guilt-ridden mind. Eddie looks up to see him a few feet off the porch, his head cocked. This damn bird doesn’t like him, though Eddie tried more than once to bond. He was beginning to think he’d never have Screech’s approval.

Screech let out a little brrup. Do you mourn the life you lead outside of this place?

“I miss my uncle,” Eddie replies quietly. His voice wobbles, but as little as Screech liked him, he was never mean. “The rest of it… if I could go back I’d be better.”

Hindsight is a cruel thing, he says simply.

Eddie glares at him, “Why do you care?”

The great bird took a step forward, shielding the sun from sight. A whine escapes Clem as Screech’s head dips under the porch to come close to Eddie. His voice was full of simmering fear as he told him, I need you to get her out of here.

“I’m trying,” Eddie whispers, throwing a nervous glance over his shoulder at the cabin door. “She won’t leave him.”

Convince her. Soon. Screech sighs in his mind, his wings drooping to his sides. She grows weaker by the day, boy.

Dread floods Eddie’s veins. His brows stitch tightly together as he thinks about that. “What happens if she gets too weak?” 

Henry will take her, Screech tells him quietly, his ghostly voice wracked with grief. As he took your friend Chrissy. She will be too weak to stop him.

A chill runs down Eddie’s spine as hot panic pools in his gut. His tunnel visions at the petrifying memory of Chrissy’s body breaking itself apart. The fear that ran through him was like nothing he’d ever experienced.

And the thought of it happening to Zero… 

“Does she know that?” he asks Screech sharply. The bird nods.

She thinks he will keep his word. I believe the moment she is weak enough for that parasite to take over completely, he will, and then he will unleash himself on the world.

Eddie stares at Screech as his imagination runs wild. Images of Zero flash before in his mind’s eye… her body decaying and snapping apart like Chrissy, Henry’s voice seeping into his mind after. Eddie…Eddie… And when Henry took him too he’d be alone again, without even Zero, the girl he wanted most by his side.

The silence warps around their throats as the fear pulses between them. Even Clem has gone quiet, pushing her bud shaped mouth into the side of his ankle. It weighs down on their shoulders like boulders, pressing them into petrifying submission before the threat even arrives.

Mr. Crowley!

Ozzy Osbourne’s voice rocketing through speakers inside the cabin made them all flinch. The volume must be on max, the way the wooden slats beneath his feet were vibrating. Normally, Eddie would have been ecstatic to hear Ozzy, but there was something ominous about it coming from Zero’s speakers when she didn’t even like the music.

The lights flash brightly as the windows shake. The clattering of dishes pick up as they had last night. Screech took a few steps away from the porch, followed quickly by Clem.

What went on in your head? 

Oh, Mr. Crowley.

“Goddamnit, shut up!”  Zero’s voice broke through the noise. Eddie sighs in relief. Screech scared the shit out of him with the way he was talking about her growing weaker. She sounded as lively as ever. 

Did you talk to the dead?

Your lifestyle, to me, seemed so tragic.

The music stops suddenly, leaving only the ceramic clinking together in the cabinets. Eddie relaxes for a moment, but then the front window explodes as the tape player flies out of the cabin. Eddie covers his face to protect from the glass, slowly peeking out from behind his hands after the initial shock. It lands a few yards away in the grass, but even though no longer plugged in, it begins to play again.

Mr. Charming, did you think you were pure?

The front door flies open as Zero stomps out on the porch. Dark circles ring under her eyes, her cheeks more gaunt than Eddie remembers them being. Or was that just his paranoia playing up? Her shoulders droop even with her rage as Ozzy continues.

Conceived in the eye of a secret

And they scattered the afterbirth

“Zero?” he asks quietly. 

Her dark eyes meet his, and the song that enrages her changes. The dishes stop shaking. The lights die down. The anger in her gaze quickly melts into worry.

I’m so in love with you, honey

And everything will bring a chain of love, oh oh oh

“Did I hurt you?”

“No, you could never,” Eddie smirks, and she gives him a small smile back. Eddie points to the tape player in the yard as the volume turns itself down. “How are you feeling?”

Rubbing a heavy hand over the back of her neck, Zero shrugs, “Tired.”

“You look it,” he tells her softly, reaching out a hand. She takes it silently, giving him a small squeeze. “You should go back to bed.”

Zero shakes her head, and too soon her palm slips away from his. She blinks slowly, as though it’s a great effort for her to open her eyes again. Did she always look this exhausted? 

This weak?

“Zee, you need to rest,” he murmurs. Eddie takes a step forward, capturing her hand in his once more. He leans his cane against the outside wall of the cabin so he can cup her cheek. She watches him nervously, like he was going to reject her, to hurt her, but Eddie wouldn’t. He couldn’t. “Just go back to bed. I can handle things for a day.”

Zero’s gaze mists as she locks eyes with him. Her jaw works as she thinks about her words, watching him like he’s going to float away. “I can’t, Eddie.”

“Why?”

Zero swallows hard, chewing once more on her thoughts. Her fingers intertwine with his, the other hand moving to hold his against her face. 

“We have to get ready,” she tells him finally.

Eddie cocks his head at her questioningly, and Zero gives him a small smile. She tells him the words he’s been waiting to hear since he woke up in her bed a month and a half ago.

“I’m taking you home, Eddie.”

I lead Eddie back into the cabin, our fingers loosely entwined. His cane thumps behind me. He left his notebook on the table outside, but he can grab it later. For now, I need to pack everything else of his up, not that there’s much. 

“Home,” he muses happily, his eyes glazing as that dreamy tone takes over his voice. Dread pools in my stomach, so I leave him there and go about packing for him. “I can’t believe it.”

He’s going to be so angry.

His shit is everywhere, I realize as I start picking things up. The guitar by the fireplace, his Hellfire shirt tossed over the armchair. Eddie’s rings sit on the edge of the sink where he washed some dishes while I was asleep… his boots lay on their sides at the end of the bed. Regret stabs me in the chest but I have to keep going.

He lives here. With me.

Correction. He lived here. I’m going to be alone now.

Again.

I snag an old tote and start shoving things inside of it. Some of the books he’d written notes all over like I wasn’t going to notice, like a copy of the Hobbit I never got around to reading all the way through, my English-to-Spanish dictionary, and a book about the history of grave markers and iconography in grave yards. I toss them all inside along with the Eddie box. 

Eddie snaps back to reality as he watches me step outside and grab his notebook. Heat plumes across his cheeks as I stuff it into the bag and he shoves his hands into his pockets. 

“I was going to tell you about that…” he says sheepishly. 

I shake my head and snag the rings off the side of the sink, handing them out to him, “It’s fine, Eddie.”

Eddie’s gaze falls to the rings in my palm as he worries his lip between his teeth. I see his mind working, the moment the truth hits his mind. Betrayal blooms across his pretty features, nearly breaking my heart right in my chest. Tears prickle the corners of his eyes.

“You’re not coming with me.”

I shake my head again and now my palm, “I can’t, Eddie.”

Eddie takes a step backward, looking around the cabin before his eyes land on the bag in my hand. Quicker than expected, he lunges forward and snags it and tosses it to the ground. Defiant and pissed, he says, “I’m not going anywhere without you.”

“Yes you are.” 

“And what’s Henry going to do to you when he realizes I’m gone?” 

Acrid fear boils its way up my throat, but I swallow it back down. It sits hot and heavy in my gut. I can’t worry about what Henry will do to me. With the notebook and Eddie, it won’t matter. Eleven can take us both out even if he takes over me completely, she just has to get stronger.

Eddie’s eyes glisten, his jaw trembling as I stare silently back. I can’t tell him what Henry might do, because then he definitely won’t leave. He’ll stay and die here with me, and after all we’ve been through together, I can’t let that happen.

He’s leaving

On that midnight train to Georgia

Eddie and I both glare out the window where my tape player lays in the grass. My stupid subconscious picks the worst times to supplement my emotions. Eddie sighs heavily, watching out over the front yard.

“I’m supposed to just go back to Hawkins and act like I never met you? After everything? After last night?”

“Yeah,” is all I can say. “Your uncle and friends are waiting for you.”

The world he left behind

Not so long ago

He’s leaving

Slowly, Eddie turns back to me, his gaze fierce. “You know this song says she’d rather live in his world than be without him in hers. In the end she goes with him.”

My jaw set, I retort, “Good for her.”

Eddie chuckles bitterly, brushing back that mess of curls I would give anything to run my fingers through. He chews on his lip for a moment as he watches me before saying, “You don’t get it, do you?”

“You don’t get it!” I snap, baring my teeth in frustration. Everything in this damned cabin shakes as my emotions spill out. “I can’t leave him. I can’t leave Henry. I promised.”

“And you promised me that you’d take me home!” 

My brows etch together, “What do you think I’m trying to do here Eddie?”

Eddie’s hand swings up, catching the back of mine and sending his rings flying. The little clinks scatter around the room as the hurt stamped into his soft face comes closer. Eddie steps forward until his nose is nearly touching mine, rage emanating from him in waves. 

“I can’t leave you, sweetheart,” he barely manages, hisses even in his anger and pain. “I can’t breathe when you’re not in this cabin. 

“No matter what I do, I’m thinking about you.” He pokes my chest, his breath hot and heavy on my face. “You invade my every thought. Everything I do is with you in mind. If it makes you happy, if it’ll make you laugh. I’ll do it without blinking.”

That finger that poked me now brushes a stray curl behind my ear. I swear if I lean forward just a fraction of an inch I could catch his lips with mine. Eddie’s voice softens, “I’m consumed by you. It’s not just that I don’t want to live without you… I can’t. It'll kill me.”

My heart drops to my stomach. If he wasn’t touching me I swear I’d sink into the floorboards. I swallow thickly, my voice hardly above a whisper, “I’m not a real person, Eddie. I can’t offer you anything. Not a life, not a future. Nothing.”

Eddie shakes his head. His cane clatters to the floor as he cups my face with both hands, those warm palms that feel so safe and comforting I just want to run away. 

“You said the white picket fence dream will never happen for you, but it can. You and me, sweetheart, we can have it.” Eddie presses his forehead against mine, and my eyes can’t help but flutter closed with how safe it feels. “I don’t care if it’s a house, a trailer… hell we can live out of a fucking van for all I care.”

He takes a deep shuddering breath, and when I open my eyes his dark brown gaze is full of such sweetness, such kindness and love that I want to run and never look back. I don’t deserve this. 

“You’re my home,” Eddie whispers. His upper lip brushes against mine as he tries to pull me even closer. My fingers twist into his flannel to keep me from bolting. “I am home. I’m not going anywhere without you.”

Every inch of me shakes. Even the lights around us flicker as I fight the urge to push Eddie Munson away and run off into the forest and away from my feelings. I’ve never felt such a pull for someone. I’ve never wanted to touch and cling the way I do him. It’s too human, too real, too much like the perfect world I dreamed of inside that fucking lab.

“I can’t leave,” I whisper, my voice quaking with the pain that runs through my soul. “I can’t survive out there, Eddie. I can’t leave him.”

“I can’t leave you,” he replies defiantly. “I won’t.”

I swallow thickly, my brows stitching together. Eddie’s gaze burns through mine, so intense and bright that I wish desperately to look away but he holds me there. “I don’t know what to do. I’m so tired, Eddie.”

He nods slowly, finally tearing his eyes from mine to look down between us. When his hands leave my face for his shirt, I can’t help the whimper that escapes me. His scarred fingers go for the buttons, fumbling here and there until his flannel slips open. 

Those deep purple scars wrench my heart in my chest. I stitched him back together piece by piece, doing my best to keep him alive. I spent days wondering who he was as I healed organs and skin, my hands stained with his blood and my mind full of questions. All that work and wonder and here he is before me.

Beautiful. 

Eddie takes my hand and presses my palm against his stomach. His belly twitches from my cold touch, his skin warm and full of life and blood flowing through his veins when I was so scared it might fade away. 

“Stop healing me,” he says softly. 

I move away in shock, but Eddie simply holds me firm. He’s stronger every day, but if I really wanted to run I could. The truth is… I don’t think I want to. For the first time in my entire life, I think I might actually want to feel this. This pain, this healing… this love.

“I can handle the pain, Zee,” Eddie tells me though I shake my head defiantly. “You’ve been sleeping all day, and everything’s been quiet. For once, you’ve actually been resting, and I felt all of the pain you’ve been trying to spare me this whole time.”

“I’m sorry-,” I begin, but he cuts me off with a smile.

“No sorries. It’s a healing pain.” Eddie licks his bottom lip as he watches me softly. “You did it, sweetheart. You kept me alive… Now let me take it from here.

“You can’t keep this up. Doing everything while healing me… it’s draining you.”

I can feel my face drop as he says that. I silently curse Screech. I know he told him.

“Yeah, I know about that.” Eddie shrugs and gives me a deep sigh. “I get it now, how much you love him. I’m sorry I couldn’t understand it before. I don’t like it, and I wish you’d leave with me right now, but I know this is something you’ll never be able to stop. You can’t stop loving someone who died a long time ago.”

Tears drip down my cheeks. I know he’s right. My Henry is gone. He died in that lab and there’s no going back. The parasite that’s been draining my powers the last ten years isn’t the boy who saved me… but I can’t seem to give up hope that one day he’ll come back.

“One day I hope you’ll leave this place with me. Just… keep an open mind, okay?” Eddie asks softly, his gaze gentle and his hands light on mine. “Let a few things slide, like the lights and healing me. Let yourself rest.”

“And you’ll be here?” I ask quietly, my voice trembling. “Even in the darkness?”

Eddie cups my face in his hands once more, leaning his forehead against mine. He presses his lips to mine, and a sigh deflates all of my stress and fears away. My arms snake over his shoulders, pulling him close.

The fairy lights flicker around us as the morning sun pours in through the broken window. My heart exposed to the elements, fear flickers through my veins at the emotion coursing through me. It’s all so new, so fragile, to be this vulnerable to someone.

His chest smooths against mine, so much stronger than it was a month and a half ago. Eddie holds me tightly to him, each kiss swallowing me whole and sealing my devotion to him over and over. I swear I can feel his heart beating against his sternum, my own matching in time as though they were fighting to touch. Too soon, he pulls away, his gaze fierce, protective, and full of so much care.

“Especially there.”

The lights finally go out, leaving only the rising sun of the Haven blanketing us in its rays.

Smurph's Masterlist | Zero to Hero Masterlist

Notes: Is anyone still reading this? I feel like I'm writing into the void on this even though people asked me to start on it again.

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