#objection lol

-Log

(P.S. Sorry he made you look like That)

based on this post

Thank you @viophire for the VD!

[VD: an objection.lol video using clean ace attorney character sprites. the sprite actions are marked in [brackets.]

klavier gavin presents a gif of a pineapple being squeezed bt a hydraulic press until the juice sprays out the bottom.

klavier: after my werewolf boyfriend pulls out

apollo justice: [shocked] your WHAT

klavier: [pointing] my werewolf boyfriend

judge: I'm sorry, am I reading that right??

klavier: [sweating] MY [a cropped image of a werewolf leaning over]

trucy wright, as co-counsel: So we're just gonna ignore the watermelon getting crushed?

klavier: [in green and red text] Watermelon

judge: ... [shakes head]

kristoph gavin, on the witness stand: Hey so does anyone have the nsfw version for that werewolf pic just asking

apollo: [disheartened] (I don't feel safe)

miles edgeworth, on the witness stand: (read as tumblr tags) #Also I dated a dude who thought he was a werewolf, #that was interesting, #Not as interesting as him calling his friend mom and supporting her when she kidnapped her siblings, #but like the attempt at trying to get me to roleplay some godawful shit was up there

apollo: [shocked] I'm sorry what

[the "Hold it!" bubble appears on screen.]

klavier: [sweating] i know im op this thread has absolutely gotten out of control

kristoph: hold on op aren't you the person who had an iq of 4?

[a gallery shot of the jury muttering.]

gallery: ...

[the judge bangs his gavel.]

judge: [shocked] I'm crying. Nobody's clearing anything up, they just deflect onto the next plot twist

disbarred phoenix wright, on the witness stand, all caps: WHAT IS HAPPENING?

trucy, side-on in all caps: OP'S THE GUY FROM THE HORNY IHOP WAITER POST

phoenix, all caps: THE HORNY WHAT?

klavier: [shocked, sweating] ...

wocky kitaki, on the witness stand: [twirling hair] Since we're just listing them off my favorite Wereralph post is the poptart pussy one

[the "Hold it!" bubble appears again.]

apollo, in caps: [shocked] THE WHAT?!

[the screen fades to black before showing a younger klavier.]

younger klavier: Oh, My Pussy? It like a toaster go like [snaps] *Ding* poptarts roasted and ready

apollo: [thinking] I am so fucking concerned for the mental health of 95% of the people on this hellsite

trucy: personally i'm at 96%

[the judge bangs his gavel.]

judge: [shakes head] This post keeps getting worse

kristoph: [angry] I often find myself wondering how this website is so utterly incapable of making money, and then I see posts like this and I am violently given my answer.

apollo: [slams desk] For the love of god, stop asking "the what?" that's how this continues!

wocky: But what about the thirty for Minotaur?

apollo: [embarrased] Ahem. The what?

judge: [shakes head] No. Cancelled.

[the screen flashes white and shakes]

klavier: [looking up] But why?

apollo: [thinking] I. Just. (What the fuck do I do with this information now)

ema skye, on the witness stand: [shocked] GUYS stop reblogging this. [presents an image of adam driver dressed in military clothes.] OP was in the Marine Core and is technically a war criminal.

[the image is zoomed in to full-screen as ema talks over it.]

ema: He turned a blind eye when his comrades killed innocent civilians in Baghdad. He refused [sic] testify against soldiers who committed atrocities towards civilians.

[screen fades back to the courtroom.]

ema: Stop reblogging OPs posts because that takes attention away from what OP is trying to hide.

klavier: [snaps] You sure that's me?

[klavier plays air guitar before banging the wall next to him.]

klavier: Like are you sure that's me?

["Objection!" appears on screen.]

apollo, in caps: [shocked] I'M- THAT'S ADAM DRIVER

phoenix: ...this has been a wild ride

trucy: I-

dick gumshoe, on the witness stand: It was a pineapple, not a watermelon.

phoenix: [mysterious] $29.99

immediately after sending this, my internet went out.