#nf 1

And then my mom told me she thinks i'm maybe having a hidden depression and my dad just nodded...

And i'm like: ? Is it really that bad?

Anyways, i really need to see a therapist soon, because:

My ADHD got worse

RSD is kickin

Discalculia messes me up

I think i could have NVLD or ASD or some shit like that, but i don't wanna self diagnose

I can't stop thinking about my neurofibromatoisis and the fact that that people could see the fibromas in my face or that the ones in my brain could maybe go cancerous and i need to make a MRI appointment and one in the NF clinic and i'm freakin scared.

I'm chubby and small, i think i'm kinda ugly and no one will ever love me... yeah, my self esteem is shitty af

The fact that i think i have a really weird version if anxiety (Like, i have no problem with calling people on the phone or asking for directions or shit, but as soon as there is a slightly above average amount of people in the supermarket or i have to sit between 2 people in class i feel trapped and uncomfortable... does this even make sense?)

I have almost no friends

I'm way to sensitive

My parents think i might have depressions

I have exams next year and im sTrEsSeD

I'm almost always getting sad as soon as it gets colder and darker outside, daylight savings messes up my sleep sedule and i hate it when i have to go to work in the dark and then also coming home in the dark.

I'm turning 20 in less than 2 months and i just wonder how i managed to survive for 2 decades without dying because of my stupidness...

This women is brave and awesome. Thanks for sharing your story Gail, it means a lot to those that suffer with this condition.

Don’t look at us as if we are monsters or have a contagious disease, we don’t. Get to know us, let us embrace you with the love that we give back, let us educate you, don’t live life in ignorance, live life being kind to one another.

I am Hayley, and I have a mild from of Neurofibromatosis, I used to pretend online I was perfect, that I was something I wasnt, I could pretend to not have NF online which I did do, but people wasn’t seeing the real me, now I’m more me and I embrace what I have, it’ll never go away. I learnt that being real and honest is better then living a lie.

The lyrics to Santa Monica go:

But on the telephone line I am anyone,

I am anything I want to be,

I could be a supermodel or Norman Mailer,

And you wouldn't know the difference,

On the telephone line, I am any height,

I am any agent I want to be,

I could be a caped crusader, or Space invader,

And you would know the difference Or would you?