#mixed experiences

[Note: this archive ask was submitted before the Masterpost rules took effect in 2023. The ask has been abridged for clarity.]

@reydjarinkenobi asked:

Hi, I’m half Sri Lankan/half white Australian, second gen immigrant though my mum moved when she was a kid. My main character for my story is a mixed demigod/fae. [...] Her bio mum is essentially a Scottish/Sri Lankan fairy and her other bio mum (goddess) is a goddess of my own creation, Nettamaar, who’s name is derived from [...] Wolof words [...]. The community of mages that she presided over is from the South Eastern region of Senegal [...] In the beginning years of European imperialism, the goddess basically protected them through magic and by blessing a set of triplets effectively cutting them off from the outside world for a few centuries [...] I was unable to find a goddess that fit the story I wanted to tell [...] and also couldn’t find much information on the internet for local gods, which is why I have created my own. I know that the gods in Hinduism do sort of fit into [the story] but my Sri Lankan side is Christian and I don’t feel comfortable representing the Hindu gods in the way that I will be this goddess [...]. I wanted to know if any aspect of the community’s history is problematic as well as if I should continue looking further to try and find an African deity that matched my narrative needs? I was also worried that having a mixed main character who’s specifically half black would present problems as I can’t truly understand the black experience. I plan on getting mixed and black sensitivity readers once I finish my drafts [...] I do take jabs at white supremacy and imperialism and I I am planning to reflect my feelings of growing up not immersed in your own culture and feeling overwhelmed with what you don’t know when you get older [...]. I’m sorry for the long ask but I don’t really have anyone to talk to about writing and I’m quite worried about my story coming across as insensitive or problematic because of cultural history that I am not educated enough in.

Reconciliation Requires Research

First off: how close is this world’s history to our own, omitting the magic? If you’re aiming for it to be essentially parallel, I would keep in mind that Senegal was affected by the spread of Islam before the Europeans arrived, and most people there are Muslim, albeit with Wolof and other influences. 

About your Scottish/Sri Lankan fairy character: I’ll point you to this previous post on Magical humanoid worldbuilding, Desi fairies as well as this previous post on Characterization for South Asian-coded characters for some of our commentary on South Asian ‘fae’. Since she is also Scottish, the concept can tie back to the Celtic ideas of the fae.

However, reconciliation of both sides of her background can be tricky. Do you plan on including specific Sri Lankan mythos into her heritage? I would tread carefully with it, if you plan to do so. Not every polytheistic culture will have similar analogues that you can pull from.

To put it plainly, if you’re worried about not knowing enough of the cultural histories, seek out people who have those backgrounds and talk to them about it. Do your research thoroughly: find resources that come from those cultures and read carefully about the mythos that you plan to incorporate. Look for specificity when you reach out to sensitivity readers and try to find sources that go beyond a surface-level analysis of the cultures you’re looking to portray. 

~ Abhaya

I see you are drawing on Gaelic lore for your storytelling. Abhaya has given you good links to discussions we’ve had at WWC and the potential blindspots in assuming, relative to monotheistic religions like Christianity, that all polytheistic and pluralistic lore is similar to Gaelic folklore. Fae are one kind of folklore. There are many others. Consider:

Is it compatible? Are Fae compatible with the Senegalese folklore you are utilizing? 

Is it specific? What ethnic/religious groups in Senegal are you drawing from? 

Is it suitable? Are there more appropriate cultures for the type of lore you wish to create?

Remember, Senegalese is a national designation, not an ethnic one, and certainly not a designation that will inform you with respect to religious traditions. But more importantly:

...Research Requires Reconciliation

My question is why choose Senegal when your own heritage offers so much room for exploration? This isn’t to say I believe a half Sri-Lankan person shouldn’t utilize Senegalese folklore in their coding or vice-versa, but, to put it bluntly, you don’t seem very comfortable with your heritage. Religions can change, but not everything cultural changes when this happens. I think your relationship with your mother’s side’s culture offers valuable insight to how to tackle the above, and I’ll explain why.  

I myself am biracial and bicultural, and I had to know a lot about my own background before I was confident using other cultures in my writing. I had to understand my own identity—what elements from my background I wished to prioritize and what I wished to jettison. Only then was I able to think about how my work would resonate with a person from the relevant background, what to be mindful of, and where my blindspots would interfere. 

I echo Abhaya’s recommendation for much, much more research, but also include my own personal recommendation for greater self-exploration. I strongly believe the better one knows oneself, the better they can create. It is presumptuous for me to assume, but your ask’s phrasing, the outlined plot and its themes all convey a lack of confidence in your mixed identity that may interfere with confidence when researching and world-building. I’m not saying give up on this story, but if anxiety on respectful representation is a large barrier for you at the moment, this story may be a good candidate for a personal project to keep to yourself until you feel more ready.

(See similar asker concerns here: Running Commentary: What is “ok to do” in Mixed-Culture Supernatural Fiction, here: Representing Biracial Black South American Experiences and here: Am I fetishizing my Japanese character?)

- Marika.

Start More Freely with Easy Mode

Question: Why not make a complete high-fantasy universe, with no need of establishing clear real-world parallels in the text? It gives you plenty of leg room to incorporate pluralistic, multicultural mythos + folklore into the same story without excessive sweating about historically accurate worldbuilding.

It's not a *foolproof* method; even subtly coded multicultural fantasy societies like Avatar or the Grishaverse exhibit certain harmful tropes. I also don't know if you are aiming for low vs high fantasy, or the degree of your reliance on real world culture / religion / identity cues.

But don't you think it's far easier for this fantasy project to not have the additional burden of historical accuracy in the worldbuilding? Not only because I agree with Mod Marika that perhaps you seem hesitant about the identity aspect, but because your WIP idea can include themes of othering and cultural belonging (and yes, even jabs at supremacist institutions) in an original fantasy universe too. I don't think I would mind if I saw a couple of cultural markers of a Mughal Era India-inspired society without getting a full rundown of their agricultural practices, social conventions and tax systems, lol.

Mod Abhaya has provided a few good resources about what *not* to do when drawing heavily from cultural coding. With that at hand, I don't think your project should be a problem if you simply make it an alternate universe like Etheria (She-Ra and the Princesses of Power), Inys (The Priory of the Orange Tree) or Earthsea (the Earthsea series, Ursula K. Le Guin). Mind you, we can trace the analogues to each universe, but there is a lot of freedom to maneuver as you wish when incorporating identities in original fantasy. And of course, multiple sensitivity readers are a must! Wishing you the best for the project.

@horse-faced-activist-gay​ said:

Hello! I have what I fear is probably a stupid question. I have a character whose great grandmother was Japanese. Everyone else in his family is white. Is he a poc? Not in a breaking him down to a percentage type of way, and there are other characters in the story who certainly are poc, and his mother was close to her grandmother's culture, he isn't so much. It just feels like I should know to capture him properly. Thank you!

Neither Japanese identity nor POC status can be assigned purely by blood quantums. There are a fair number of individuals in the US who identify as mixed/ Japanese/ Japanese-American who fit the above description. What is more relevant for the purposes of your story is how this character views their Japanese identity, how they interact with white culture in the US, and how both of these concepts affect their interactions with family and friends. Please research the concept of “white presenting” for further insight. 

- Marika.

While in some ways, sometimes, I am white presenting, I’ve been pretty connected to my culture since childhood, so I’m pretty solid on my own POC label. I’ve reached out to other white-presenting Japanese peers for their experiences! 

It’s a complicated relationship. My respondents were split on whether or not the POC label was right for them individually, although everyone identified as Japanese/Okinawan. The POC label is very much a matter of personal choice and how you want to be perceived. As Marika said, sometimes it’s less productive to talk about “who is POC” and more productive to consider how someone’s racial or ethnic identity changes how they interact with the world. 

One common thread was how quickly they were racialized or invalidated the moment they opened up about their heritage. 

A: [Regarding physical comments like “oh, I see it a bit now in your eyes”] I've always seen it as ego soothing, like “damn sorry I misread your ethnicity here's something.” In the Western mind Asian people have particular eyes. Either that or the way people look at me shifts when I mention my ethnicity.

B: I recently had an experience where a professor said I couldn't be a person of color because I was lighter than a paper bag and it caused a whole discussion that was frankly humiliating. I feel weird claiming the identity of POC because I can evade a lot of racism just based on looking white. I've noticed a lot of my experiences with racism are based on disclosure. I generally get treated as white until I mention being multiracial or Asian specifically, then people get weird.

Another common thread was feeling as though monoracial white people didn’t see the utility in identifying with the non-white culture at all, and pressured them to “embrace whiteness”: 

A: I never got put into the Other category by white people. To white people it's always been, “why are you so weird, just accept you're white and move on.” I'm stubborn so people pushing against me meant I pushed back harder. My identity as an Okinawan-American is much greater than my identity as a European-American these days.

C: [It] made me feel so off-put. “Embracing” my whiteness was all me, on my own terms, using my own realizations. I'm fairly fine to say that I feel like I was bullied out of saying I'm Japanese openly. 

They also noted that monoracial Asians also gate-kept them out of the community (an experience I share with A as well!). 

A: When I mention something about my ancestry [to someone in the Asian-American community] to connect as a fellow Asian-American, I always get like, "wow really? I couldn't tell, you must've taken more after your [white] Mom" or some shit. So it can be a sensitive topic for me. It does feel like the second I drop the fact that I'm Asian on another Asian person it's like a test, like they gotta measure my Asianess." 

On a more hopeful note, they mentioned that they’ve worked to find ways to connect with their heritage or find a supportive community, and that it’s been rewarding. 

A mentioned that the local Vietnamese-American community was welcoming, and also found that learning Japanese in university meant a lot for cultural connection. 

B found that taking Japanese classes, going to Japanese cultural events, and sharing Japanese food with friends helped them connect. 

C mentioned having a great time exploring traditional dress and kimono workshops, as well as buying old/vintage Japanese items to learn about them. 

All of them mentioned that online nikkei communities have also been a great space to connect with each other, although they said there was a certain je ne sais quoi about in-person interaction that they greatly missed. 

So, OP, I hope you can see from this that cultural connection and community are going to mean a lot to someone like your character, and you should represent that by giving him an interest in keeping up with his Japanese culture, even if it’s through the little things. 

Also from my wonderful respondents is this message to any white-presenting Japanese person struggling with their identity (and this can apply to other white-presenting mixed folks too!): 

C: I think you'll build some confidence as you get older and that confidence includes not just your personality, appearance, but who you are. I fought to get into those Asian student clubs (failed), went on dates with some Asian people (failed), tried to make friends with certain Asians on the basis we were both Asian (failed), went to Japan and tried to connect with people (failed). You shouldn't have to do all this to prove to others or yourself that you are who you are. All my Asian friends have entertained the "come over I want to make this recipe" or "let's go see this Japanese pottery shop." Find people who want to support you.

@ciaraskellington said:

I want to make sure I’m not playing into any trope or prejudices: in my story my mc discovers she’s the heir but her father already has another daughter. My mc is Latino/white but the other daughter is middle eastern/white. I don’t want it to be like this whiter (more white passing) character is taking away something from a woc. The queen is middle eastern. And there’s plenty other characters of color. The daughter does other important stuff and she didn’t even want to be queen

Well, they’re both mixed/half, aren’t they? To be entirely honest with you, I don’t see how one would be taking anything away from the other. It’s already established in the plot that their shared parent is white, so both of them have to be at least half white. When we talk about “passing privilege,” that’s only important insofar as the character gets preferential treatment in the story for their features relative to others who lack those features. For example, me walking around in Japan and being told that my hafu features make me prettier than the average Japanese (which is yikes). In this case, your middle eastern/white character is not getting royal treatment because she appears whiter relative to your MC, it’s literally because she’s a royal, and because your MC is literally not in the picture yet. 

(I’m also confused as to why your MC who I assume was born out of wedlock—since the queen is Middle Eastern—would be an heir, but that’s up to your worldbuilding, of course)

It’s also unclear why you assume that the mixed middle eastern girl will be more white-passing in terms of features. Latine/Latinx is not a race; it’s an ethnicity, with a variety of possibilities for racial identity. 

~Mod Rina

White mixed ≠ lightening. White mixed ≠ “you get half.” 

Human genetics is a very complicated topic, especially in regards to skin tone. People can be full blood siblings and be three to five shades darker or lighter than their relatives, just based on what parts of their parents’ genes they got. 

It’s not so simple as “you get half.” You literally cannot know every little thing that is in your genes, let alone know how each individual egg/sperm has split, let alone any potential mutations that happen in-utero while the child is developing, let alone the hormonal influences that create their own distinct things that are unique to every pregnancy.

Mixing white with any other ethnicity won’t necessarily simply make the child paler and more white passing/European looking. You could have inherited parts of your parents’ genes that have a darker skin tone, so you can be as dark or darker than your parent of colour even with the mix of white. The white person could be a carrier for genres that would make their child darker, or more prone to tanning.

This isn’t even getting into featurism, where somebody pale can look very not white because of racially coded facial features (that can even be inherited from white parents—because it isn’t any one facial feature that makes someone racially coded). Two people of the same foundation shade can look like they belong to two completely different racial groups because of this. 

As Rina said, Latinx isn’t a race—and Middle Eastern people range from very pale to very dark. You really have to look at the spectrum of shades that these populations have and get out of the pale-centric mindset, especially if you’re basing your sample size on actors. Fair skin is prized in a lot of media industries and you’ll struggle to find darker skinned representatives of the population in question because of this.

Examine why you assumed the Latinx person would be darker than the Middle Eastern, why the royal would be white passing because of a white father when this isn’t automatically the case, and what references you’re pulling from to ensure you’re getting a full understanding of the diversity of the populations in these two very large and very diverse geographic regions. 

            Laughs, smiles, and hugs. The three things that were always among us. Everything always seemed so perfect because they train you to save your innocence for as long as possible. They fear the cold world themselves and at times regret bringing you into such an environment. There’s nothing they could do about it now. They try to hide their bruises, they only cry when they think you’re sleeping, and they try to hide the fear in their eyes. All the hurt you don’t understand you just remember the laughs, smiles, and hugs.

            5 Years Later…

            You notice the bruises but to you it’s just a trip down the stairs. You hear the cries, you hope they’re tears of joy. That look in her eye turns to hopelessness. The laughs, the smiles, and the hugs come further and further apart until you don’t remember what they feel or look like. You feel neglected and you become selfish. You were never taught the bad things people were capable of, only the good. You feel you deserve more than you were given, a safe life. You never understand you just become selfish and forget the hand that feeds you because she’s of no use to you. You’ve abandoned her when she needed you most.

            5 Years Later…

            You remember the pounding behind the doors and the muffled shrieks so much so that they’re now coming from you. Now, you're trying to hide your bruises. You finally understand. It’s as if everything in your life makes sense now. You pray and hope if you make it out of this with at least one ounce of breath you’ll go back for her. You’ll go back and help her like she helped you and hope it’s not too late.