#meninism

to act as if men’s problems were and are caused by anything and anyone but men is intellectually dishonest or plain stupid. the patriarchy this, the patriarchy that. i am fully aware that the patriarchy does not 100% benefit men, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t designed to. men have higher suicide rates, are constantly fucked over in divorce and alimony cases, blah blah, but whose fucking fault is that? men will complain about child custody but will turn around and advocate for the fact that women are naturally more inclined to care for children, that we’re softer and, quite frankly, just breeding machines. men are in the light they hate specifically because of the light they placed women in; you hate that you’re not allowed to show weakness, but you’re the ones who actively spout that idea. i have never known a woman to tell me or a man that men shouldn’t cry, but i’ve seen many boys go around telling their buddies to suck it up — so who’s really the problem? nobody can care for you if you do not first care about yourself, and that’s why i ultimately don’t care anymore.

women owe you nothing. we built, and continue to build on, feminism for us. instead of complaining about what men don’t get, start providing it for yourselves. open up to your friends, and to the friends who will be opened up to, don’t just dismiss it as weakness. don’t immediately run to women, start with your community. women have to start by supporting each other before we can go out and make a difference, so, men, start by supporting each other.

despite men not caring about men, i can confidently say that i have never known a man to care about women. some care about a woman, sure, maybe even a few, but never women in general. i have never known a man, in his own time, to speak about the injustices women face and how he contributes to it, i have never known a man to even think of that. i will not go ahead and tweet “men’s suicide rates are higher” when you refuse to even think about it yourselves. men’s issues are only ever brought up to silence women, or lower their voices, and it’s disgusting. i refuse to speak up for someone who only speaks over me.

men have issues, but there are no “men’s issues”. you have issues because you are a human being (unfortunately) and we have women’s issues because we are not treated as such.

First, we have our two main characters, Chris and Martin Kratt. Keep in mind these two are basically self-inserts - and there are plenty of creators, especially males, who have used self-insert characters in really scummy ways - all I have to say is Powerpuff Girls reboot and you know exactly what I’m talking about. Even if they weren’t literal self-inserts, male characters, superheroes especially, oftentimes serve the male power fantasy, being just the strong, stoic, all-powerful person so many boys are told they’re supposed to be. I could get into a whole discussion about how the male power fantasy is present even when males are not (ever look through a fashion magazine and wonder why there are so few men? Sure, part of it is that the industry thrives off exploiting women’s insecurities, and men aren’t as concerned for their appearance, but another part of it is so that the guy, looking through it, can feel like he has no competition for these women - there’s a reason so many comedians have jokes about fashion magazines being their sexual awakening as kids. It’s really scummy) but that’s not what this is about. So, the bros had every opportunity to do just that - make themselves these traditional heroes who aren’t actually really good role models, like batman or what have you. It’s certainly not uncommon for celebrity cartoons to do stuff like that. But Martin and Chris chose a different approach. They’re pretty strong standouts for positive masculinity. They’re openly affectionate - both with eachother as brothers, and with their friends. They cry, sometimes over little things - most of the time when big superheroes cry, it’s ‘cause they lost the girl they loved or their mentor or something like that, only in the big, most agonizing moments do they shed a tear. But here, Chris or Martin will cry just because they’ve had a bad day, or because they’re overwhelmed and overjoyed that someone named a mantis after them! In a lot of shows or movies when a guy cries over something little, it’s usually played for laughs, or to emasculate him, but here it’s casual without being unreasonable or overdone. The brothers cry just ad much, maybe even more (haven’t gone back and counted or anything) as the girls do. Not to mention, it’s a very nice depiction of a loving, healthy sibling relationship. As the youngest sibling myself, it’s refreshing to see a pair who don’t abuse eachother with noogies or cruel and snarky remarks. When they do fight, it’s never a screaming match, and also because they had a conflict of interest or disagreed over a fact, not because, say, one of them stole the other’s shirt or is neglecting the other’s feelings. Kids, being very impressionable, get exposed to a lot of abusive sibling relationships played as normal in media, and start thinking this is how siblings are and should act. For instance, my sister (who is now my best friend and has gotten over all these bad habits over time) when she was younger watched a lot of Kim Possible, a show that is great, but has a bad family dynamic with Kim and her little siblings. The “tweebs” as she calls them are always irresponsible, destructive, and making Kim annoyed to no end. My older brother was one of the most polite, reserved, kind little kids, but she still treated him like he was a brat and a nuisance, because that’s what shows like Kim Possible taught her little brothers were. Additionally, I was always treated like a spoiled crybaby who just wanted attention and got away with everything - I was not any of those things, ever, but that’s what shows teach you little sisters are. Sure, Wild Kratts has a smidge of that, with Chris seemingly being the stereotype of the know-it-all little sibling, but instead of being constantly looked town upon for being too “perfect” like with Hailey Long in American Dragon, Martin often praises his brother for his abilities. Sure, Martin gets annoyed when Chris tries to correct him on things, like in the episode Wolf Hawks, but everyone else does too, so it feels more like a take-down of mansplaining than a sibling spat.

I talked too in the feminist post about how refreshing it is that Chris and Martin more or less willingly put themselves under the authority of Koki and Aviva, two women of color. I don’t think it’s possible to say any one character is the “leader,” they all work as a evenly balanced team, but it’s safe to say that Koki and Aviva make the more responsible decisions. The bros try to get out of their calls a few times, but the show plays it more like they’re being irresponsible, and less like they’re renegade cool dudes who don’t take nothing from nobody, especially not two girls. They are pretty much always punished via karma for their reckless choices, most especially in To Touch a Hummingbird, where their arrogant attitudes blow up in their faces rather spectacularly. We also never see the narrative most present in sitcoms, where the male leads mess up and go out of their way to cover it up and ultimately gets away with it - after all, you have to root for them, right, because sure they messed up and had no consequences, but aren’t they just so lovable? No, here Martin and Chris always have to fix their wrongdoing, and it’s always deserved when they get comeuppance. Another aspect of the show I like is that, many times, when the bros get captured or are in peril, they are saved by the women - and most refreshing of all, there’s never a moment of “wink wink nudge nudge wow I can’t believe I had to be rescued by a GIRL” or even “wow you saved me you’re pretty good honey guess I shouldn’t have underestimated you, you go girl!” No, when the girls save them, it’s just - you know, relief? Because they were saved? It’s never a scenario played as an exception, or any more dire than when the bros need to rescue eachother. The bros are genuinely happy to have them as teammates. The show even did the standard “boys vs girls” episode in the form of When Fish Fly - but instead of being actually girls vs. boys, it’s engineers vs. adventurers. There’s nothing really gendered about it - the girls happen to be engineers, and the boys happen to be adventurers. And the episode doesn’t end with the boys being “wow gosh darn I shouldn’t have doubted you girls are better at everything,” it’s a mutual agreement that both parties have hard jobs. Basically, the bros are very naturally respectful of women. That plays more into their feminist narrative too, but either way, it’s refreshing.

Then, we have Jimmy! Jimmy, the lovable gamerboy pizza man. At first glance Jimmy seems like the stereotypical cowardly, pathetic, emasculated loser. He’s frightened of most things, as of yet has no power suit, and he BAKES for crying out loud! But none of these things are framed as terribly bad traits. Sure, we laugh when he screams and runs from an animal, but though it happens over and over, the crew doesn’t get sick of it. They don’t berate him or belittle him because he’s so gosh darn cowardly. There’s a great scene in Rattlesnake Crystal where Jimmy has to deliver something to the bros alone, in the middle of a spooky desert. He is terrified the whole time, sprinting off after he delivers the goods. When Martin and Chris run into him, they don’t laugh at him for being spooked, they just greet and then bid fair well to their friend. To them, this is just Jimmy, and there’s nothing wrong with it. Jimmy isn’t coddled, but he is reassured many times that he’s a valuable member of the team. I love that little message, that you’re just as important of a person even if you can’t do as much or have greater limits. When his friends do try to get him over his fears, it’s not because they have to, that the day will somehow be ruined by Jimmy’s incompetence p, but because they’re his friends, and want him to experience fun and wonderful things that he would otherwise miss out on. But what Jimmy CAN do is just as important! Jimmy is a gamer, which in a lot of shows, is portrayed as a lazy, useless, mindless hobby. But here, because he plays video games, it makes him essential for piloting the ship and teleporting important items. There’s always the joke that video games improves your hand/eye coordination, but recent studies have shown it has much better effects. It can make you much better at keeping track of multiple moving objects and processing technical but variable information- two traits which, fittingly enough, are really really important for air traffic controllers and airplane pilots! He also demonstrates a lot more courage behind the wheel of the Tortuga, which makes sense - in an impersonal setting, he would have more sense of calm and control and courage, because it’s so similar to a video game world. It’s not all too different with how I feel more emboldened to pick fights with people on the internet, but get crazy anxious if a real person so much as looks at me. So Jimmy’s love of video games isn’t because he’s irresponsible, it has real benefits. A quick last point - Jimmy also eats a lot, but they thankfully don’t make him fat or greedy or anything like that. He never takes food from people, he actually bakes, and shares it with others! Having the baker be a boy is a lovely touch.

I might do another post about the toxic masculinity of the two villains, (or four villains, I guess, if I wanna discuss the minions) but I’ve got other work to do, and this post is long enough already, so I’ll get around to it later. I’ll sum it up with this - Wild Kratts is a show that teaches boys it’s not only ok to be kind, but essential. The brothers protect defenseless animals, advocate for things “icky” and “weird,” like bugs or snakes or worms - not because they’re boys, and boys like icky things, but because they genuinely see the beauty in all life, and are encouraging us to slow down and do the same. The Wild Kratts are heroes who save the world not by being the strongest or smartest or coolest, but by looking after those who are exploited and vulnerable, who are essential to the world, even if they can’t always do everything. In Wild Kratts the only weaknesses a man can have isn’t what he can’t do, but what he does do that he shouldn’t have. Sure, it’s a cute show about two funny guys who have cool powers, but it’s also a show about accountability, compassion, respect and trust. The show says “boys will be boys” in all the right ways - Martin is a lovable goof with a heart of gold, but he still has to get his act together when he messes up, and he’s still creative and smart and openly sensitive. Chris is a bit of a know-it-all show-off, but he can also mess up as much as his brother, and is still bold, brave, adventurous, and can put his money where his mouth is. Jimmy is a cowardly, napping, eating machine video-gamer, but he’s still a valued member of the team, has incredible skills and talents, and will always help his friends, even if he is really, really scared. It is so important to have role models like these, in a world dominated by unhealthy machismo. The Wild Kratts are heroes who save the world - both animated, and real.

I have a confession.  Princess Peach was one of my first “sexual awakenings”. No, wait, okay. I have to be REALLY honest. She was my first sexual awakening. There. I said it. I had a crush on a fictional character before a real person. She always had and always will have a soft spot in my heart ever since I first played Super Mario 64.

Nowadays, Princess Peach has been shat on in favor for Princess Daisy.

In our more enlightened age, people have forsaken the “classical view” of a princess that was seen in Princess Peach in favor of Daisy. Over the years, Daisy has been subtly marketed as the more tomboyish of the two. She’s peppy, she’s loud, she’s brown-haired because we need to take back the throne from the blonds, and she’s “the more fun one”. 

Fuck that Princess Peach, amright? That hoity-toity dumb bimbo who keeps needing to be saved. This is the 21st century - down with stuck-up blonds!  And meanwhile, I was there in the corner laughing nervously at this uproar and whispering, “I’ll never betray you, Princess Peach. They don’t understand you like I do.”

I get it though. We need to showcase a wider variety of what a princess acts like. All for it. Princess Peach stood for the stereotypical blond bombshell princess that Nintendo cashed in on. 

Well, originally, she was red-haired, but that changed with the times in favor of blond. That’s the thing though! Peach became what the popular male psyche demanded and desired at the time! 

Therefore, she became the target of contention for every woman who grew up failing to meet her standard. But now it tipped too far in one direction, and I can’t help but feel that we never learned our lesson.

It concerned me when female gamers seemed to learn to hate Princess Peach by practically drawing an X on her face a la Mean Girls and muttering, “She’s a bitch.” When I’ve played Super Smash Bros. with girls, one of them typically makes some scathing remark about Princess Peach. “What a whore.” “That bitch.”

“That blond bimbo.”

Yay.  In reality, we fell into the patriarchy’s trap all along - women hating on women. When Super Princess Peach first came out in 2005, I happened upon it by chance in Best Buy when I was looking for something for my birthday. It was always a deep dark secret that I now openly admit. I fervently wanted a video game that starred Princess Peach ever since I was little. Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars for the SNES was the closest thing at the time, but we all know how obscure that game became. And there I was, 15 years old, all red-faced at buying a stupid video game. When I approached my mom in the store to show her what I wanted, I felt like I was making a drug deal. I shifted my eyes around me to make sure I wasn’t being followed or watched. I murmured, “This one.” I was confident that she would go along. She doesn’t read much into these things. She mixes Nintendo games with PlayStation. She would just buy it and go. 

But that time, she stared at the cover for a while and said aloud, “Is this right? Super Princess Peach? Are you sure this is for you?”

AUUGGGGH. MOM DON’T MAKE A SCENE HERE IN BEST BUY THIS IS WHAT I WANT OKAY? BYE. I said yes, and she further asked some questions like “Are you sure?” and “Is that a little kid’s game?” And I just gritted my teeth and mumbled something incoherent about it being just another Mario game.  I finally got the game, and I was excited to play, and breezed through it in almost one sitting.  At the same time, it was an awful game.  Let me lay it out this way.  This is the first time in Nintendo history that Princess Peach gets her own video game. 

Right?  It’s her BIG debut.  And so. . . The game has her trying to retrieve the Vibe Scepter from Bowser, and place it back in its rightful place on Vibe Island. Without the Vibe Scepter, people’s emotions are out of control. 

Are you sensing a theme yet? 

No? 

Let me go into more detail. 

The gameplay requires you to tap into Princess Peach’s four emotions (Joy, Sadness, Anger, and Calm) to get through obstacles. So, say you need to grow a flower, you make her sad and she cries so much that it---I fucking can’t even continue writing this. You get the picture.

So there I was playing this game in my bedroom and realizing how horribly sexist it was. I had so many conflicting feelings about it (maybe THAT’S what they were trying to do?) because on one hand I wanted to support my first waifu but on the other hand this was laughably dumb and sexist. I played through to the very end anyway. The other non-emotion-based abilities were enough to keep me going. That was really what I wanted. I just wanted a Mario-like game starring Peach where she used her umbrella and shit, maybe did a dance, and then saved the day and winded down with some tea in the final cutscene. Like you know Super Smash Bros. Brawl in the Subspace Emissary cutscene where she meets Fox?  She’s sauntering down the Halberd while a literal dogfight is happening in the sky above her, completely unperturbed.

                                          (Peach just not giving a fuck.)

And like her only reaction is a little “Oh!” as she protects herself from the wind as if it were nothing more than a little squall.  There’s some sweet action of Sheik breaking into Fox’s cockpit, and the two jump down to the Halberd and run at each other until Peach raises a hand and offers tea to stop the conflict. 

That is the Princess Peach I want to see, the one I think is rare in media - a conventionally feminine action/adventure protagonist.

Lord knows we have enough femme fatale assassins with a dark past.

The femme fatale assassin is seemingly the only acceptable female protagonist in movies. Why? Because it’s a male fantasy. The only way men are going to see a movie about a female action hero is if she acts more masculine. And it’s a trap. It’s a fucking trap. We dug ourselves in a hole again and can’t see the point three inches from our fucking eyes.  You rarely see a female action protagonist who shouts “Ew!” when she sees a bug, or who loves to collect pins, or who has a thing for baking, or who doesn’t have some terrible trauma as a backstory. You never see a female action hero who is awkward around men or has no idea how to seduce someone. The moment a female character like Princess Peach can star in her own game, the developers play into female stereotypes of emotions. They market the game for girls by tying it to emotions, in a world where we are still afraid to treat the female lead equal to the male lead. THAT is the problem I have with Super Princess Peach. I brought this up once in a certain video game forum a long time ago. The reception wasn’t very well met. I knew I shouldn’t have opened that can of worms but I fucking did it anyway. Just couldn’t shut up about it. Goddammit, Eddie, you should have shut up. You should have shut up. But no, I couldn’t. We’re doing this. We’re having this conversation. It was just burning on the tips of my lips. “Hey, isn’t Super Princess Peach a bit sexist?”

The surge of counter-arguments included things like “Well it’s not about Peach being emotional, it’s the island and the island is out of control so everyone’s emotions are out of control.” To me, that sounds awfully like the developers tried really hard to find an excuse to incorporate female stereotypes about emotions. It’s just so obviously contrived. I fervently wanted someone to see my point. I didn’t go out and about just starting arguments this way. I kept waiting for the right opportunity to spring into action. 

The second and final chance popped up on Facebook. This was still a long time ago. Maybe some six-ish years ago? I don’t even remember how the debacle started but I think someone brought up female protagonists in video games, and I brought up the unfortunate failure of Super Princess Peach and how it was sexist.  I was immediately torn apart.  Immediately.  This time was different though, because the person who tore me apart was a woman.  I thought, “Dammit, Eddie, maybe you were wrong the whole time. Maybe I AM the bad guy.” Not only did the dude bro Pr0 GaMeRs disagree with me, but now a female gamer too. 

“You are dangerously belittling women's’ emotions”, she told me. I cringed so hard at myself and wanted to just crawl up and die. It was such a stupid argument and I honestly was ready to die. I feel SO dumb admitting it but I was just SO into that argument. I had officially died on the hill that I so desperately wanted to defend and nobody - fucking NOBODY - was on my side.  I went through a dark time (of like maybe a week) and dove into in a dark place (my bedroom). I questioned my morals and my goodness. Was it sexist to dislike the game? Was it not sexist? Was it sexist to equate the game with the stereotype that men think of women as PMSing all the time? Was it not sexist to identify the stereotype? Because aren’t the makers of the game trying to weasel their way into applying their beliefs about women and what they think would attract female gamers? Maybe it’s only sexist in the metaphysical context? Maybe this is what the patriarchy is all about - trapping you in an endless pandemonium where you can never be sure if you are advocating for freedom or oppression. It was a never-ending soul-crushing conundrum that I couldn’t break free from, constantly philosophizing and moralizing.

But look - Nintendo marketed Super Princes Peach towards girls in hopes of drawing them in to what they think they could relate to. It sold well, yeah, but it wasn’t like large swaths of girls in the gaming community suddenly exclaimed and said “FINALLY! THE GAME FOR US!”. Why? Because it’s fucking patronizing, that’s why! Girl gamers just want to play the same shit that guy gamers play. Legend of Zelda, Final Fantasy, Call of fucking Duty. I had this piece in my drafts for well over two years, afraid to post it. 

Fuck it. 

This is the other side of the pink tax and it isn’t preferable - both are limiting.

Rationally I know that hours of market research and planning have gone into this but ultimately it just reminds me that the only way to sell to men is to sell ONLY to men in a way that ONLY reminds them they can ONLY be men.