#line 12

[intro]

Ben:

Good evening! You’re listening to King Falls AM – that’s 660 on the radio dial.

Sammy:

Folks, we are jumping right into it tonight. We got Deputy Troy on the line live from Libbydale Farms. Hey, Troy, can you hear us alright?

Troy:

Loud and clear, Sammy. Heard you real fine, too, Ben.

Ben:

Suck an egg.

Sammy:

Okay so, Troy tell the listeners what you just told us right before we went on air.

Troy:

Ladies and gents, in all my years – and I mean all – I ain’t never seen anything like this. Not even comparatively close to what I’m lookin’ at right  this instant.

Ben:

POINT. GET TO IT.

Troy:

Gosh darnit, Ben. I’m trying to sell the magnitude of what I’m feasting my eyes on!

Ben:

Who even knew you could see Libbydale Farms from so far out in the Kiss Ass Sea of Worthy SS Backstabber.

Troy:

You know GD well I’m not on a ship nor would it be called the SS Backstabber if I were. Don’t be so damn sore, Ben. Everybody knows I’m sorry! Plus I reckon my ship be called the USS Super Badass.

Sammy:

[clears throat] Troy. Ben. Let’s put our differences aside and let’s get to the matter at hand. So, Troy, you’re live at?

Ben & Troy:

Libbydale Farms.

Ben & Troy:

I’m trying to talk!

Sammy:

Guys!

Troy:

As- as I was sayin, I’m out here at the farm and out past the barns just hours ago, Old man Libbydale called us in and acres upon acres, boys, have been de-stroyed.  

Ben:

Where were you earlier this evening, Troy?

Troy:

Using my keen detective skills and ninja like mental agility, I can see you’re trying to place me at the scene of the crime, little buddy. However Ol’ Troy was sawing logs next to the Mrs before my shift.

Ben:

While crimes are being committed? Typical.

Troy: Now that’s a low blow. Just because –

Ben:

NO! NO! YOU-

Troy:

Ben come on –

Ben:

[sarcastic] Ohhh yeah ohhh just soooo good at –

Sammy:

GUYS! Guys! I understand there’s a new intensity between you two, but Ben, as co-host of this show and a respected journalist…put it away. Troy, you’re the first friend of The Sammy & Ben Show and a deputy sheriff. You guys don’t have to be best buddies, but let’s please report on the news story at hand.

Troy:

Couldn’t have said it better myself, Sammy.

Ben:

Jesus.

Sammy:

So, Troy – Oldman Libbydale called you out. Acres of his lands destroyed. How so?

Troy:

Y’all ain’t gonna believe it, but you know I always shoot you straight. Two words: Crop Circles.

Sammy:

Crop circles?

Troy:

It’s like a live action Led Zeppelin album cover as far as the eyes can see. Big ones, little ones…the craziest damn designs you ever could imagine.

Ben:

Troy, I assume you and the rest of Gunderson’s thugs – I mean deputies – inspected the circles and the surrounding areas for man made tools. There have been stories of men with boards tied to ropes that can replicate what people believe crop circles to look like. Bending the crops at the right angles, etcetera… did you find -

Troy:

Didn’t find anything, Ben. Not a board, not a footprint, nothing but hunched over crops.

Ben:

So you think…?

Troy:

Oh there isn’t a doubt in my mind it’s the UFO’s or those lights. I mean, whichever you wanna call it. No man made these. And in just a few hours to boot!

Sammy:

Okay, so has this ever happened here before, Ben?

Ben:

No. Nor abductions. Not even the lights being so close to town. The past few months have been a hotbed for extraterrestrial activity, it would seem.

Sammy:

It would seem? So you aren’t certain?

Ben:

[laughs] I only said it would seem so you wouldn’t get all defensive about it.

Sammy:

Okay, alright. Well as much as I hate to say it, I definitely feel there’s a lot more than meets the eye here in Kings Falls.

Ben:

I’m not one to say I told you so. But I did tell you so!

Troy:

Just so everybody out there knows, Libbydale Farm is private property. So, unless you’re doing the dairy farm tour in morning, this is not an attraction for looky-loos. There is an official investigation still on going here. Plus don’t nobody need another person gettin’ snatched up by the Martians either.

Ben:

Martians are from Mars, Troy. They aren’t representative of all extraterrestrials.

Troy:

Whatever, Ben Nye the Science Guy. I’m headed out to the field again. I may not be smart as Ben about the aliens and such, but I can definitely sniff out a spot where the Williams Boys will come lookin for mischief and mayhem. [hangs up]

Sammy:

Deputy Troy, folks. Now I didn’t realize you and Troy were still so angry at one another, Ben. You can’t let that hostility –

Ben:

Thanks Dad… we’re just gonna take a break to hear from one of our fine sponsors. Maybe Sammy here can talk to me about the birds and the  bees after we get back.

Sammy:

Maybe…

[ad]

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[intro]

Sammy:

You’re listening to King Falls AM and we’re opening up the phone lines to you. 424-279-3858.

Ben:

We’ll be talking about the apparent crop circles situation at Libbydale Farms as well as if any of you out there have had any experience with this phenomenon.

Sammy:

So give us a call or tweet us @kingfallsam. So, you’ve heard our story, now let’s hear yours.

Ben:

Line 3.

Sammy:

Good evening you’re live with Sammy and Ben.

Cynthia:

Good evening? For who? Certainly not King Falls!

Sammy:

Hi, Cynthia. How about you tell us how you really feel tonight.

Cynthia:

Well, to be honest I’m a little rattled over these gang signs these aliens are leaving on our turf. Literally.

Ben:

Cynthia, there is no way to tell if those circles are angry or happy, even. They’re just symbols.

Cynthia:

So’s a swastika, Ben Arnold. Get your head out of your tuchus!

Sammy:

Okay, obviously, we aren’t trying to raise alarms here, Cynthia. It’s just, uh, an interesting story. Especially here in our own backyard. Would you not agree? Uh, you know, it’s not every day you can see this kind of handy work, man made or otherwise.

Cynthia:

You two sound so happy. We’re getting tagged in an intergalactic war and all us in the Falls are sitting around at ground zero.

Ben:

I don’t think that’s fair –

Cynthia:

That’s the problem! You just don’t think. It’s all Tim Jensen’s fault, I just know it. We didn’t have any flying saucers and land tattooing bedlam before he chased those lights.

Ben:

He didn’t chase anything! He was driving from work and called to report on a breaking news story.

Cynthia:

Watch your tone, Ben. I’ll buy one of those disease ridden sugar flyers and toss it in Lake Hatchenhaw just to spite you!

Sammy:

Goodnight, Cynthia.

Ben:

Sugar glider. And they’re illegal.

Cynthia:

So are illegal aliens, but you’re just getting ready to throw them a parade. I can’t! I just can’t! [hangs up]

Sammy:

Heh, alright, uh… Line 12 you’re live on King Falls AM.

Emily:

Hi, Sammy! Hi, Ben!

Ben:

Emily! I – I didn’t realize you were back in town!

Emily:

I just got back. I was listening on the way in. My mom and I actually drove by the farm and saw all the commotion over there. Police, reporters, big lawn mower thingies…

Ben:

Lawn mowers?

Sammy:

Uh, you know, if you don’t mind me asking, Emily, why were you out of town?

Emily:

Oh I flew out to Buford, Wyoming for the annual small town librarian expo, and I had my mom pick me up from the airport since Ben was on the air.

Sammy:

Wow, so you guys are in the taking and picking up from the airport stage of your –

Ben:

Friendship. Is that the word you’re searching for, Sammy?

Sammy:

That was exactly the one, Ben.

Emily:

[laughs] You guys are so silly. But I just wanted to say hi and tell Ben I’m back home now! Oh! And starting next week, I’ve got a whole bunch of fun activities I learned from the expo to start doing at the library. Hopefully we can get some of the scared kids back now.

Ben:

I’ll call you later, Emily.

Emily:

Goodnight, Ben. Night, Sammy.

Sammy:

Emily Potter, ladies and gents. King Falls librarian and Ben’s…friend.

Ben:

Yeah, yeah. Lucky Line 1, you’re on King Falls AM.

Caller:

Hi, guys! It’s Greg Frickard!

Sammy:

Hi, Greg! You know, we appreciate you running the ads on the show, sir. It’s so nice to meet you… uh, over the phone, of course.

Greg:

Thanks, Sammy! I think we’ve talked before and uh, glad to run the spots. Me and Granny Frickard love the show! You should hop on down to the Froggery and we’ll hook ya up!

Sammy:

I might have to take you up on that offer, Greg!

Greg:

We’d love to have you! You too, Ben…

Ben:

Greg, you’re a lifelong King Falls resident…we’ve been talking about the crop circles out at –

Greg:

Oh I know. I’ve been listening, but I was actually calling about something else if that’s okay.

Sammy:

Uh yeah, sure thing, Greg. What’s on your mind?

Greg:

Well, I heard Ben and Ms. Potter a second ago and they made a declaration of friendship? Is that correct?

Sammy:

Oh. Uh. Is this about Emily?

Ben:

Did you call before when Emily was in the studio, Greg?

Greg:

Uh, no… [nervously laughs] that must have been…somebody else. But is that true, Ben? Are you and Miss Potter just friends?

Ben:

Good friends. Close friends. Real close.

Greg:

Huh. Welp that’s all I needed to know. Thanks a million, buddy.

Sammy:

Hey uh, Greg – you didn’t have a comment or –

Greg:

Oh, no. I just - [laughs] I don’t know the first thing about crop circles and what have you. Uh, it’s real interesting and all, but Ms. Potter’s lovely voice just…speaks to me. I always just assumed that Ben and Emily were bf and gf respectively, but… if that’s not the case then…

Sammy:

Ben? You okay?

Ben:

I don’t like putting our personal lives out there in the public eye.

Greg:

Well, gee, Ben. I’m only asking because if you’re into friendship with the lovely Ms. Potter, I’m afraid I just might be into courtship. Granny wants to see me married before going into the great By-and-By

Ben:

Okay, bye bye to you too, Greg. Looks like we lost line –

Greg:

I’m still here, pals! Now about that thing-

Ben:

[hangs up] Line 7 you’re on King Falls AM?

Sammy:

Did you just hang up on –

Ben:

I would never. Line 7.

Herschel:

I’d like to voice a complaint, right this instant.

Sammy:

Herschel?

Ben:

Is everything okay, Mr. Baumgartner?

Herschel:

Would I call into you nincompoops if everything was honky-dory?

Ben:

I guess not…

Sammy:

So what seems to be the issue, Herschel?

Herschel:

All this yackin about GD UFO’s and crop circles, for starters. Makes my damn di[censor] itch.

Sammy:

Sir! This is –

Herschel:

Did you call me to tell me what to think, comrade? Or did I call you to talk about an issue?

Sammy:

Please continue, Mr. Baumgartner…

Herschel:

Thank you. So, I’m out on the lake tonight – got up bright and early so I could make sure I got my special spot.

Ben:

Got up early? It’s just now a little past 2…

Herschel:

You the sleep police?! Ya little bastard… I thought not.

Ben:

Sorry, Herschel.

Herschel:

So I’m trollin, out on the – well, that parts top secret, boys. But I’m trollin, so I don’t scare the biggins away and those [censored] damn sons of [censored] rainbow lights start blowing through the sky. Looked like Joseph’s Amazing Technicolored Dreamcoat was fightin that big Jap lizard!

Sammy:

Godzilla? Please don’t use derogatory –

Herschel:

McCarthy would’ve skinned your ass alive, you red sack of [censored]! Can I tell my story?!

Sammy:

Of course, I’m just asking you not to –

Ben:

I’m on the button, Sammy. Herschel’s gonna Herschel…

Sammy:

Okay, so you saw the lights tonight…

Herschel:

Saw? Hell, they scared the literal piss out of me. The trickle down my Carhartt looks like the state of Florida. I’m out here naked as a jaybird! Not a fish in sight.

Ben:

I’m sorry, did you just reference a musical, Mr. Baumgartner?

Herschel:

Oh just cause I like some colorful metaphors means I can’t be refined, Ben?!

Ben:

I wasn’t – I didn’t – imply- I um I’m just saying-

Herschel:

Oh Mrs. Baumgartner – god rest your sexy soul, Edna – used to love those hippy-dippy singing plays. And I’d do anything to keep in those pants, fellas.

Sammy:

Oh, god.

Ben:

Awww. Can we get back to the lights?

Herschel:

That Edna. Oh, lemme tell ya… oh, uh, yeah – the damn lights! Yeah, so, I saw ‘em. What the hell else am I supposed to tell ya about it?

Sammy:

Well, you were calling to complain about them, I’m sure.

Herschel:

That’s right! I’d like to report that no good drunkard! Cecil Sheffield! Called that cumbersome ass-wart damn near 15 times to come bring me a pair of skivvies to no avail! Avoiding my calls and his duties as a co-winner of this damn boat!

Ben:

It’s so late, Mr. Baumgartner. I’m sure he’s sleeping now.

Herschel:

You would take up with him!

Sammy:

Ben’s just sayin that he isn’t avoiding you so much as he’s, you know, probably asleep.

Herschel:

Sleeping one off! Soggy son of a [censor]ch. He knows if I ring the special line, it’s a damn emergency.

Ben:

So, you guys have made up?

Herschel:

Made up my ass! If he’s gonna be co-anything with Herschel F. Baumgartner, that tallywackers gonna have to keep up his end of the bargain.  

Sammy:

To be at your beck and call in case you… soil yourself…

Herschel:

Don’t be crass!

Ben:

So, you guys are actually sharing the boat? That’s awesome! I figured you-

Herschel:

I ain’t sharin a damn thing with that son of a [censored]. Stop stirrin the pot or I’ll make what Charlie did to John McCain look like foreplay, Ben Arnold!

Sammy:

So, to the point, you’re calling to complain about Cecil because he’s sleeping through your time of need?

Ben:

But he is corroborating seeing the lights, Sammy! That’s a big deal.

Herschel:

Just have an intern or something bring me some britches and stop the fiddle fu[censored] fuss! 32 long! I’ll be at Begley’s. He’s probably peering out his window lookin for a damn show… I don’t like beige! [hangs up]

Sammy:

You’re on King Falls AM with Sammy and Ben.

Riley:

Please hold the line for Mayor Grisham.

Sammy:

This again?

Ben:

[groans]

Sammy:

You know, I wondered, do you wake him when we say special key words, or…?

Riley:

Mayor, you’re on with Sammy and Ben.

Grisham:

Sammy. Ben. I hate to rain on your topic of discussion tonight, but let’s shut it down. It would be much appreciated.

Ben:

What?

Sammy:

The always fair, Mayor Grisham, folks. Remember this come election time next year.

Grisham:

Do you think that a public servant should have to call the local Tom & Joe Chuckle Hut Show to ask them not to jeopardize a police investigation?  

Sammy:

Do you ever call Channel 13 and tell them what to report and how? We are a topical late night talk show, Grisham.

Grisham:

Mayor.

Sammy:

I didn’t vote for you.

Grisham:

Fair enough. I don’t expect you to respect anything but your own pathetic grab for ratings. Now, regarding Channel 13 –

Ben:

Sorry, Mayor. Obviously, Sammy is flustered. He wouldn’t have used such a bad example if he was thinking straight -

Grisham:

The answer to your question, Sammy, is no. I wouldn’t call in and tell a reputable news agency how to do their job. BUT, amazingly enough, I continue to have to ask you to stop your rhetoric seemingly once a month or so. Interesting, don’t you think?

Ben:

You do realize the only people that watch Channel 13 are drunks that can’t find the remote and animals left alone with the TV on, right?

Grisham:

Whatever helps you sleep better, Ben. I can tell you for a fact that right now Storm Sander’s is probably not working a local yokel interview and digging up the muck. He’s reporting on city ordinance 29.44371.

Ben:

Storm is knee deep in a barrel of backyard bathtub hooch during commercial breaks.

Sammy:

So, Mayor, what is this ordinance? Ya know, since we aren’t reporting the news to your liking, give us a glimpse into what works for you.

Grisham:

The add on to the local YMCA. The new menu at Rose’s. I’m not paid a handsome salary to do your job.

Sammy:

Oh, right! I forget you think you can dictate what we report on, for free.

Ben:

Sammy… they’re destroying the crop circles! That’s the ordinance!

Grisham:

There’s hope for you yet, Ben. Don’t go down with this ship. I’ll put a good word in for elsewhere.

Sammy:

You son of a [censored]! You’re destroying the crop circles? That could be the only thing that brings Tim Jensen home!

Grisham:

Don’t bring Tim Jensen into this!  The city is paying Libbydale Farms a fair share for their remaining crops! But it is in the public’s best interest to mow down this batch of mischief accordingly! Especially after this broadcast.

Sammy:

[laughs] You are despicable.

Grisham:

These affairs aren’t your business to ramble on about. Do the weather! Talk about traffic! I mean, I filled those potholes! Stop making trouble!

Sammy:

Freedom of the press. When your assistant isn’t typing out our every word, maybe have her look it up and tell you all about it.

Grisham:

I can’t wait to hear about it! And here’s a little phrase for you to look up too: obstruction of justice.

Sammy:

Uh-huh.

Grisham:

Do you think using your connections to officers of the law to report on breaking news is fine and dandy, Stevens? You are perverting the course of this case.  Certain things, especially ongoing issues, aren’t mean to be talked about until all the facts are out there. And you idiots are prying on the scene reporting with your bagel eating buddy who happens to be a cop.

Ben:

Not my buddy…

Sammy:

Ben.

Ben:

I’m not throwing you under the bus, Sammy. I just hate Troy.

Grisham:

So, the moral of the story would be, gents, somethings require couth. Somethings require kid gloves when handling. And most things don’t need to be aired in the public for ratings and entertainment. A perfect example being how I’m sure Sheriff Gunderson handled Deputy Kriegshauser on his own for calling into this joke of a show with police business constantly. Doubt you’ll see that done during a press conference.

Ben:

Uh, is that really necessary, sir?

Grisham:

This show is a breeding ground for incompetence and you’re now dragging your pals down with you. Straighten up and fly right.

Sammy:

Troy doesn’t need to be punished for you to make your point, Grisham.

Grisham:

Out of my hands. I’ve already had Riley send my opinion on and over to the Sheriff. Now again, I ask you, pick a different topic of discussion. Maybe one that won’t lead to the continued pain and misery for all those around you. Night, night, fellas.

Sammy:

I’m gonna call Troy.

Ben:

Umm We’ll be back after this, King Falls. We’ll take some calls about uh… I guess we’ll see…

Grisham: Stay vigilant, but most importantly, stay hopeful. And Tim, wherever you may be, just know that your friends, family, and everyone in King Falls is looking forward to your eventual and safe return.

[KFAM music]

Sammy: Good evening, I’m Sammy Stevens and you’re listening to 660 on the AM dial. Welcome to King Falls AM. I’m here with Ben Arnold.

Ben: Again?

S: Yes, again, Ben! My producer slash co-host, emphasis on co-host. That voice we just heard from was mayor Grisham, of course, speaking out about the recent disappearance of Tim Jensen.

B: If you or anyone you know has any information about Tim’s disappearance, we urge you to reach out to the King Falls sheriff department.

S: Now, on a lighter note, we’ve got a big show tonight folks. We’ve got an interview with Emily Potter, who’ll be telling us all about the grand reopening of the King Falls library in just a few short days.

B: Plus a call from Dr. Raul, later in the hour.

S: I can hear the excitement in your voice Ben. You’ve got your gunning for network news underoos on today.

B: Any network but channel 13, Sammy. They can suck it.

S: Now, before we bring in the lovely Miss Potter, we’re going to-

B: Is she lovely?

S: Well, I mean, I haven’t met her, but I assume she’s a lovely person, small town librarian and all.

B: Lovely...personality? Gotcha.

S: It counts.

B: That’s what they say.

S: So, okay, before we bring in Miss Potter-

B: Couldn’t help but notice you didn’t use any adjectives that time.

S: Ben, is there something on your mind?

B: Not at all! It’s just that, our old librarian, Mrs. Kilpatrick, was not what you’d call a lovely...anything. Lady got her scholarship in war torn nazi Germany, so I’m a bit apprehensive to call anyone running the town book shack lovely. Can I just say, for the record, that Mrs. Kilpatrick used to place the learn to draw books in the reference section. If anything, they’re self help books, and if a kid wants to check one out, learn how to draw droopy the damn dog, then maybe they should let him.

S: *chuckles* You’re not wrong, Ben, but maybe-

B: I haven’t told this to anyone, ever, but when I was a kid, I was walking down the aisles, and I saw that old whisper nazi put Mein Kampf in the children’s section, and she-

S: Maybe we can ask Miss Potter her opinions on the King Falls Hitler youth, as well as opening up the phone lines to you dear listeners, right after this commercial break.

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Announcer: Ernie’s mufflers, come on down and ask about our King Falls AM discount.

S: Welcome back, folks, and thanks for tuning in to King Falls AM, sitting in the studio with us is, can I say lovely now Ben?

B: Stunning.

S: Is the lovely Miss Emily Potter. She’s here to talk more about the town’s library grand reopening later this week, is that correct?

E: It is, and thank you for having me on Sammy, and Ben, I’ve been listening to you every night.

B: Beautiful.

S: Well, we certainly appreciate it. Now, if you don’t mind, catch me up to speed on why our fair town’s library was closed in the first place.

B: Gorgeous.

S: Ben.

B: Hey, Sammy.

E: Well, the library was closed due to renovation. It’s an older building and-

B: Built by Francois Swindle, 1912, largest brick and mortar structure in King Falls until 1918, when city hall was built.

E: Oh my gosh you are exactly right Ben. So smart.

S: You know, I’ve driven past, it is a magnificent building. So they’re just replacing some older fixtures and what have you?

E: Oh no, the top floor of the library was set on fire.

S: I’m sorry, purposely? Who tires to burn down a library?

E: Unfortunately, that mystery is yet to be solved, but not for lack of trying. Sheriff Gunderson and Deputy Troy have been hard at work these past few months. Though, I think the bigger problems was the disappearance of Mrs. Kilpatrick.

S: Wait a second, the library was set ablaze, the old librarian, Mrs. Kilpatrick-

B: God rest her soul.

S: -has disappeared. What is going on here? I mean, are there any leads, uh, you know, other than Ben?

B: Ha! Good one Sammy! *forced laughter* What a kidder! I’m not, I'm not sure why you’d say that at this time.

S: Two words. Book. Shack. Uh but I mean seriously folks, how many people are missing in this town?

B: *clears throat* Emily. Can I call you Emily?

E: Please do.

B: Can, can you tell the listeners anything that might help shed some light on these subjects?

E: Well, for weeks leading up to the fire, Mrs. Kilpatrick had been having...visions.

S: Visions?

E: Yes. To the point where upper management had been talking about retirement. I don’t know if we should be talking about this with the investigation ongoing and all…

S: I think-

B: Maybe it could help, Emily. Your words, your magnificent words, could be our best, last, chance at saving dear Mrs. Kilpatrick.

E: You’re right Benny.

S: Um.

E: The visions she was by the checkout desk. At first it was a shadowy figure carrying a book. Upon closer inspection, she realized it was actually President Lincoln, who she believed was trying to check out a book.

S: President Abraham Lincoln?

B: 16th President of the United States. Jeez Sammy, catch up will you?

E: This went on every night at closing for close to a week, until the second vision appeared.

B: Go on.

E: She watched from the second floor as President Lincoln brought the book to the front desk.

S: Just by chance, what book does a deceased president of the United States try to check out?

B: “Twelve Years a Slave”, duh.

S: Alright, too easy Ben, how about uh, “How To Lose Friends and Alienate People.”

E: I don’t th-

B: I like it, but I think Lincoln is probably more of a “Who Moved My Cheese” type.

E: Privacy and all, I...I couldn’t say even if I wanted to.

B: Yeah Sammy, privacy and all.

S: I uh, of course, library patient privilege, gotcha, so please continue Miss Potter.

E: So, she watched from afar, quietly putting away the periodicals, then she felt a wind rush past her to the ledge. That’s when she saw….

S: What’d she see?

E: A vision of John Wilkes Boothe. Peering over the ledge, watching the president as he waited for a librarian that never came.

B: Fascinating.

S: Okay.

B: Oh, here comes Mr. Skeptic. He didn’t believe in General Abilene. Lemme guess, Sammy, you don’t believe in president of the United States either? The great emancipator.

S: Oh Ben will you stop it, I'm just wary that a ghost of-

E&B: Vision.

S: Right, that a vision of President Lincoln and his assassin would be wandering the halls of King Falls public library, that’s all.

E: I understand your reticence to believe in the visions, Sammy, I thought the same thing. But, as I'm sure Ben can attest, Mrs. Kilpatrick wasn’t one to-

B: If she said she saw it, she saw it.

S: So, she has visions, what does that have to do with the fire?

E: Well, Mrs. Kilpatrick actually in a small apartment in the library.

S: In the library? Uh, that might be creepier than the visions

E: She complained to management about the noises, the visits, apparently there were arguments?

S: Arguments? Between Lincoln and Boothe?

B: So they were keeping old lady Kilpatrick awake at night?

S: And, you know, then Kilpatrick gets fed up, there’s no Peter Venkman to call, she does what she can do and sets the place on fire?

E: Well, I don’t know if Mrs. Kilpatrick would’ve done that.

B: All due respect, oh she would have.

S: I think it’s cut and dry actually, you know, maybe we should call Deputy Troy and solve this cold case?

B: Well, what do you think happened Emily?

E: I have to assume that Boothe did what he could to get to the president again. Unofficially, of course. Uh. God, we shouldn’t even talk about this with the investigation and all.

S: Alrighty, well, that said, we’re gonna open up the phone lines now. We’re talking about the library opening back up later this week, after some difficulties. Maybe you’ve got a question for Emily?

B: Maybe you’ve seen the visions in the library as well, we’d love to hear about that. S: Or that too. You’ve heard our story, now let's hear yours. 424-279-3858.

B: Or tweet us @kingfallsam. Line 12, uh, wouldn’t give a name

S: You’re on King Falls AM.

F?: Yeah uh, I’ve got a question for Emily.

E: Hi!

Frickard: Lets say that...my friend checked out a book last year and due to the fire and the closing wasn’t able to return it on time. Are overdue charges being forgiven?

E: If you couldn’t return it due to our renovation then I'm sure we can overlook it.

F: Cool.

S: Thanks for the question.

F: Wait, uh, I’ve got another question for Emily.

E: Oh! Okay…

F: Are you seeing anybo-*hang up*

B: Next caller! Uh...we’ve got line 4, Cynthia

S: Hello Cynthia, you’re on the air.

Cynthia: From what I gathered, in this interview, as well as the news report that Channel 13 ran-

B: *scoffs* You shouldn’t listen to them, Cynthia

C: Excuse me Ben, excuse me.

S: Cynthia.

C: From what I'm gathering, the library, if you wanna call it that, is a despot of desolation. Arson? Check! Fifty Shades of Gray? Check! Presidential assassins? Check!

E: Cynthia, I believe-

C: What are you, twelve, and you’re running the show? Could we at least get an adult to watch over that den of depravity.

S: Cynthia, I think we could probably argue that the worst of the library’s problems are behind it.

B: This is a new chapter in its history. Did you see what I did there Emily?

E: *laughing* You’re so funny!

C: Oh my god, hose those two down Sammy, it’s unbearable!

S: Cynthia, did you have a question regarding the library?

C: Yes. My boys are 10 and 6. Does the revamped library have a kids corner?

E: It most certainly does.

C: Are you overseeing it?

E: Yes, I am.

C: Ugh. *hang up noise*

B: We’ve got line 8, Sammy

S: King Falls AM.

?: Hey King Falls, long time listener, first time caller.

B: Long time?

S: Uh, the station appreciates the patronage.

?: I don’t listen to the station really. I listen to you. *hang up noise*

E: Ooh.

S: Okay…

B: Yikes. Uhh. Try 14 Sammy.

S: Good evening, welcome to the show.

Old Lady: I saw the president.

B: Oh! Another sighting.

S: Ma’am, are we talking about President Lincoln in the King Falls library or President Obama on Fox News type of thing?

OL: Lincoln!

B: Oooooh!

E: Mrs. Kilpatrick?

Mrs K: I saw him! *hang up noise*

S: Well terrific, I mean I didn’t need to sleep tonight anyways, it’s fine.

B: Uhh...one more before commercial, we’ve got Greg line one.

S: Greg, do you have a question for us?

Frickard: Yes, this question is for Emily. If a man, such as...my friend, wanted to court you, would you be avail- *hang up noise*

B: Pay some bills Sammy.

S: Emily, thank you so much for being here with us tonight, enlightening us with the tales of the library.

E: Oh, it was my pleasure. I just want all the listeners to know that, while we can’t wish the visions away, they more than likely will stay away from us in crowds. So please come join me in the reopening ceremonies this Thursday at 10am.

B: I will be there.

E: You’re a sweetheart, Benny. Thanks for having me on guys! *sounds of her leaving*

B: Any time, Emily.

S: She’s gone, Benny.

B: Ben.

S: Oh, so only Emily can call you Benny?

B: She, she didn’t call me Benny. You’re ridiculous.

S: Oh yeah, that’s me. Look, I get it. She’s a very attractive girl, and you guys hit it off.

B: We did, didn’t we?

S: But really, she called you Benny.

B: Don’t.

S: That’s the Ben we know and love folks.

B: Yeah, yeah.

S: Alright. Now after this quick message from our sponsors we’re gonna be back, and we’re going to be talking with Dr. Raul from the King Falls Chiropractic Center, and getting daily tips to keep our backs on the straight and narrow. And I'm sure Ben will be just as flirtatious with the good doctor.

Mexico subway overpass collapses, killing 15 and injuring dozens (Video)

An overpass carrying a subway train collapsed in Mexico City late Monday, killing 15 people and injuring at least 70, according to local government officials. Touchaheart blog gathered that the subway was traveling on an elevated and outdoor portion of the city’s rapid transit system on the newest Line 12, also known as the Golden Line, when a portion of the overpass collapsed, Mexico’s…

I'm sure the design of the metro carriages has been studied in detail and that wear, tear and tagging would show less on this design of the chairs on line 12. However, if it was modern at the time, it's more ugly now. Perhaps time to revamp with a retro touch?