Haiki on Fixations and Passions
“I cannot handle pain so I avoid it no matter what.” “I don’t need anyone, other people need me.” “I seduce, therefore I am.”
Twos have a passion for pride, and because of this, feel wonderful and generous. They live in the most absolute abundance and feel above everyone and everything.
The problem of this passion is that they feel omnipotent and do not know how to ask for things for themselves. They think they know what everyone needs and end up being very invasive.
The Two is NOT the helper that other views of the Enneagram describe. Twos have a passion for their pride and this is fixed in their character through false generosity. This means that while they give, they unconsciously expect something in return. Therefore, they are not altruistic or truly generous. To get what they want, they use seduction and manipulation.
Therefore, they forget what they need (because they struggle to ask directly) and they spend their time guessing what other people need to generate, with their “omnipotence,” constant debts. If the other person ultimately forgets this subtle commitment that has been formed, the Two will become frustrated.
They hide their low self-esteem through a self-confident image and the feeling that the world has to love them.
“People don’t love me for what I am but for what I do, so I put in effort to do a lot of things and do them well.” “My value depends on the recognition of others.” “If they do not see me, I do not exist. Only if I have success and prestige will I be happy.”
Threes have a passion for vanity — vanity which is not necessarily arrogance or “coolness.” In the social subtype, this bold front is more obvious, but in the other two subtypes, especially in the self-preservation, it has much more to do with the need for recognition. because of this, the Three is a specialist in guessing what the other needs and giving it to them. Therefore, they guarantee recognition. Differently from the Two, they do this with effort and rigidity. The two gives fluidly and without much strategy, while the Three puts themselves in chameleon mode to satisfy the desires of the other.
The Three fulfills their need for recognition through the search of achievement and applause. In the social subtype, there is a tendency to be more direct in this search, acting outwardly confident, while the self-preservation subtype prefers to be in the background. This being said, just because they are not right in the forefront does not mean that they do not want the same pat on the back, and they will do whatever is necessary to get it.
Their mindset tells them that they have to achieve a lot in order to be recognized. They need, in some way, for prestige to be present in their lives. They think “if I don’t have recognition, I die,” and this search for applause becomes the mantra they follow. Because of all that has been said, the Three lives in the world of image and false appearances trying to cover up the empty interior.
Threes can be true chameleons, and will work hard to give others what they think they need, and therefore, the other will always look at them positively.
“It is better to complain than to ask.” “Other people are worth more than me and do things better, so I do not deserve to be happy or be loved.” “Life is a valley of tears.”
Fours have a passion for envy; therefore, they always feel they are lacking in the most exaggerated way. They always suffer like they are the most suffering person to see if, through this, they can get any form of affection and/or attention.
It is very important for the Four to understand that, in this type, passion of envy is much more important and prominent than the idea of being unique, sensitive, or special. If someone does not have the underlying tendency to compare themselves, placing themselves at the bottom, they are NOT Fours.
Fours are not just special and creative souls. This description could fit with Sevens or any other type. Fours live with the passion of Envy and fixate on a false feeling of lacking. They suffer and complain. Anything that comes to them seems like not much. Sometimes, it is true that they are not receiving much, things really are being given to them, but they always see the glass half-empty.
The Four, even though they can learn how to manage this, in most cases, the emotional rollercoaster they live on clouds their capacity to reason.
Fours live in victimization and constantly compare themselves as below others, a motive to take on the supposed path to compensation. They ooze sadness and melancholy.
“Loneliness is my refuge.” “If I give, I become empty. If I am seen, I will be hurt. If I trust, I will be betrayed.” “Knowledge is my security.”
Fives live with a passion for avarice. It is not an avarice that has to do with accumulating material things, but more of an avarice of themselves. They can’t give of themselves to others and whenever they can, they build a world of their own and isolate themselves with their things (which tend to be scarce). What they protect is their most sensitive essence. Therefore, they tend to focus on studying to know a lot about very specific things.
Fives have an excess of autonomy that tends to go hand-in-hand with an obsession for learning. Accumulating knowledge could very well be another fixation of theirs. In an average state of neurosis, they have the feeling that others do not deserve to even listen to everything they have learned with such care and effort.
Therefore, they build walls and end up with little contact with the world. They tend to be introverted and cold.
They struggle to trust people and have a fear of being invaded. Their internal sensation, apart from the information they have learned, interestingly, is a sort of emptiness and scarcity.
“The world is a dangerous place and I have to protect myself from it.” “It is better to not make decisions than to take the risk of making the wrong one.” “I have to be responsible and accept the group norms to be accepted.”
The Six has a passion for fear. However, fear is a passion that is a little bit tricky to think about while typing Sixes. Why? Because we ALL feel fear. Maybe some Eights don’t but, in some amount, fear is present in every type. Because of that, we like to add the nuance that this fear is more like a vital angst that disconnects them from the here and now and projects them into the future. They like in constant doubt and need to know what to expect in order to go out into the world. Interestingly, when they do take action, they can seem quite confident.
Sixes have a passion for fear and a vital angst that fixates this type in doubt. They live in uncertainty while desperately looking for certainty.
They like hierarchy and like to be a good “second-in-command.” They tend to orient themselves toward duty and doing the right thing. They can be quite efficient and responsible. (social)
They can be loyal, but this is not their principal trait, unlike what many viewpoints of the enneagram say.
They are very insecure people who try to sell security. To arrive to this point, however, they have doubted so much and thought about thousands of options and possibilities, being specialists in thinking about catastrophic scenarios.
Their vulnerability can lead them to, counterintuitively, be quite counterphobic at times. (sexual)
“I am happy when I do what I want, so I don’t commit and I have a lot of plans.” “You need to focus on the positive side of life, people love me when I entertain them.” “Suffering is useless — it’s better to enjoy, laugh, and flee conflicts.”
While the Seven is in close contact with joy, don’t make them connect with their vulnerability! They live with a passion for gluttony. They will always be on the side of enthusiasm, and differently from Fours, they do not want to know anything about painful things and much less about suffering. This being said, some Sevens are optimists, while others are pessimists. For Sevens, life is made for enjoyment, which they constantly look for.
Sevens tend to get involved in too many things and tend to struggle finishing what they start. They give everything in the beginning but then get bored and go do other more fun things.
Fixation: Self-Indulgence
The Seven is associated with the fixation of self-indulgence. This means that the Seven always go all out with experiences and are always planning new and exciting things to do. But, in their head, everything is allowed — whatever they do, they’ll be fine. Their self-indulgence leads them to systematically avoid blame, and therefore, not see reality as it really is. Additionally, if something is not pleasant in their head they rationalize it to ensure they do not come into contact with emotions like sadness. They feel they must always be joyful, and if they are not, something is wrong. But, as we know, burying emotions considered negative, in the long run, will not be good. It will only cause more pain, as even if we consciously deny that part of reality, it will all stay there unconsciously. Additionally, in Sevens, we observe the fixation of fraudulence, where they confuse fantasy with reality. Therefore, they are always looking for future activities to do. The possibility of doing something to a Seven is just as important as actually doing something. Because of this, even if they have not finished whatever they were doing, in their head they are already somewhere else more fun and exciting.
“The world is a jungle where only the strong survive.” “It’s better to not trust anyone to not be disappointed.” “Rules were made to be broken — if I want something, I will go get it.”
Eights live with a passion of lust, looking without rest to constantly satisfy their primal desires in the here and now. They track down strong emotions and if they do not find away to attain them, they get frustrated. However, they will get frustrated no matter what, because everything is too little for them.
The lust of an Eight is not necessarily sexual, even though it can be. It has more to do with the concept of excess. Everything seems like not enough and they tend to stay far away from vulnerability.
Through the fixation of vengeance, Eights do not show vulnerability and are capable of acting as boldly and decisively as necessary.
They are moved by a justice-seeking vengeance, thinking things like “to be respected, I must be feared.”
This being said, Eights think they only way they can make their mark on the world is through being powerful.
They are antisocial individuals pretending to be social, and therefore not always the “leader” other enneagram viewpoints seee them as. Obviously, they can be leaders, in a role of making orders and mandates, but this trait is not key to Eights.
This being said, they need control. If they have to act excessively strong to gain it, they will do so. They will do whatever it takes to get what they want, even if it means stepping over others.
“In order to be loved, I have to be pleasing and sacrifice myself for others. Therefore, I never say no.” “Other people’s needs and desires are more important than my own.” “I stay active so I do not feel.”
If we think about the deadly sin of sloth, we think of people who do not do anything. In the enneagram, however, the type we associate with this passion (not sin) is the Nine. But, even though their key word is sloth, it refers to a sloth of the self. A narcotized way of life and a robotic way of doing. They act based on the inertia of not looking at themselves and merging with others. However, this doesn’t mean that they are just standing there without doing anything.
Their sloth is psycho-spiritual and goes hand-in-hand with forgetting the self. Because of this, they tend to be prisoners to merging and never find out what they feel or need.
The self-forgetting of the Nine leads them to fixations such as confluence. They forget themselves and lose themselves in others, not recognizing their needs, and especially not their gifts.
The search for peace is NOT a strength of a Nine. The excess of searching for calmness leads them to avoid conflict and not appear in the world with assertiveness. They are missing the believe that they have a right to a place in the world, and therefore seek to and often can appear invisible.
All of this being said, they sin by being too “good,” and not knowing how to say no. While the Two can do anything, the Nine puts up with everything. They do not know how to establish limits, causing them to become quite masochistic. They are people who know how to put up with things and have a really hard time expressing their anger (until they explode).
Their tendency to forget themselves leads them to narcotization and fall into serious addictions and problems with food and drink.
Their problem is not that they do not do things, as they do a lot. But this doing tends to be robotic and not meaningful.
“Only if I am perfect am I worthy of love.” “Duty is more important than pleasure.” “You must sacrifice yourself in order to do things right”
The One intensely feels their passion for anger, but don’t be scared talking to them! They easily connect with the feeling of resentment, which is an emotion related to anger. But, does this mean that Ones are angry people? No, they are just a type that has some anger bubbling on the surface. They may swallow and bury it down deep inside or express it with zeal (depending on the subtype).
The passion of anger goes hand-in-hand with seeing everything in black and white — you’re with me or you’re against me. To the One, their blood boils when they are not treated as being right.
The passion of anger causes the One to want a perfect world. For them, duty comes before pleasure. They think that this is a good lifestyle and, therefore, think it is obvious they must control natural impulses. That is not an emotion but rather a cognitive distortion of reality, and therefore, a fixation. The One does not desire perfection according to universal criteria, but they search for it according to their own worldview — how they think things ought to be. They see chaos that others do not see and, therefore, want that everything is organized according to their criteria. They have a need to control the situation and their environment. They think that if they do not work hard to be an example, no one else will know what to do. As we can see, even though the passion of the One is anger, they come with a lot of self-righteousness as well. They live in a excessively and obsessively rigid world.
