Hot take: Everyone has the right to write an enemies to lovers ship whatever way they like. If they like to write the two of them being toxic and codependant of each other, it's okay. And if someone wants to write them having a healthy relationship it's also okay.
"B-but fiction is not morality!" "The appeal of enemies to lovers is the toxicity!"
First, sometimes it doesn't have anything to do with morality. Sometimes it's just a preference of the person to read stories where they are healthy. Sometimes people just prefer the healthy dynamic of the ship instead of the toxic one. It's not that the shippers don't want to "embrace" the toxic aspects because of their "morality", it's just that the toxicity of the ship is not the reason why they like the ship.
And second, the appeal of the enemies to lovers might be the toxic aspects for you. For other people, it might be the redemptive aspects of the ship, or the hurt/comfort potential. And you can't force people to enjoy a ship the way you want them to enjoy the ship.