#fallingapart

You can and you will keep doing this. You may be broken but you are not held together by threads, you are held together by that which binds us all, your force of will. You are the force that binds us and you doubting your strength really pisses me off. You brought us together with the strength of your mind, you brought us back from the brink and returned us to our former glory.

But we’re deteriorating. We’re all falling apart. The body is failing and I can’t do anything to fix it. My mind is fading. Something is fundamentally wrong; it’s like the foundation on which I built our world is failing.

I know kid, and I don’t know how to fix that, but even if our world crumbles you can rebuild. You’ve done it before. You will rebuild, and it will be even stronger than before.

I've been losing it,

going off of the deep end,

I don't know what the future holds

Can't imagine myself growing old

Feel like the whole world's collapsing around me

I don't know what the hell to do

I think my sanity is screwed

Feel like I'm drifting alone in space

I've been falling faster

My mind is going numb

Life is a big disaster

I'm falling out of touch

/Ly. (Falling faster, Dylan Espeseth.)

Stop. You need something that reminds you of the better times, not something that brings more depression. Here.

Pressure, pressure calls my name

I think it's time that I should

Push it back and entertain it

I measure, measure in my brain

All of the times that I've been

Too afraid, it's time to change it

Time is the key but the devil just keeps on knocking

I don't want to stand at the doorway of the forgotten, oh, oh oh

Fear wears a smile but I'll be the last one laughing

Try to take me down, no it ain't ever gonna happen, no, oh oh

No, not today

Not gonna make the same mistakes

No, not today

Not gonna cave, not gonna break

Under the pressure

Under the pressure

(I'm never gonna break)

(No matter what it takes)

Under the pressure

Under the pressure

(I'm never gonna break)

(No matter what it takes)

Pressure, pressure calls my name

I think it's time that I should

Push it back and entertain it

/ly (Under the pressure, the score.)

Why do you care so much if I fall into depression?

Because I cant live if you don’t. And I’m tired of your shit. So get your ass in gear, figure out what you wanna do in life. And get it together.

Now the dark begins to rise

Save your breath, it's far from over

Leave the lost and dead behind

Now's your chance to run for cover

I don't want to change the world

I just want to leave it colder

Light the fuse and burn it up

Take the path that leads to nowhere

All is lost again

But I'm not giving in

I will not bow, I will not break

I will shut the world away

I will not fall, I will not fade

I will take your breath away

/ly (I will not bow, breaking Benjamin)

But I don’t know what to do… I’m lost… I have no purpose…

Then you make your own purpose, carve away what you don’t need and rebuild with what’s left. You need to move on, you need to grow stronger.

what do I do?

That’s for you to decide.

Fuck.

“Blurred”

i am falling, not like leaves — but like pixels, fading at the edges until no one remembers what the original looked like.

the mirror speaks static, and i listen — every word a glitch in the system where feelings buffer and meaning loads too slow.

they said we’d be connected, but i feel more ghost than girl, more scroll than soul.

i swipe through moments that should’ve hurt, but all i feel is a low battery warning in a heart that forgot how to charge.

somewhere between the filters and the fear i forgot what real feels like.

I told myself it's just for a moment

To be able to escape the long overdue.

But here we are 1 year later.