#euluc

"This.. alliance you two share," Diluc clarifies. "It's too dangerous. I won't allow it." "I'm inclined to agree," Eula says. "You two being in the same nation at once leads to chaos." "What about the wedding? That went smoothly, did it not?" The two merely exchange a silent glance before shifting their gaze back to Kaeya. "Anyway, she's already made her plans for a second home," he counters. "With Neuvillette's approval. Need I remind you two about the last time he was here?" "Oh, I haven't forgotten," Diluc answers. "But I wasn't the one in danger." Kaeya feels the room getting warmer. "So you're just going to ban her from Mondstadt, like you're banned from--" "Oh, please. I don't have the authority to do that." But Mora speaks, Kaeya thinks. "What I can do, is a restraining order," Diluc adds. "A… what?" Kaeya's floored at this point. "She hasn't done anything though... not to you." That's probably a lie, but he doesn't backtrack. It's too late— the words have already been said. Diluc almost laughs at the absurdity of his brother's words. But he composes himself. "I beg to differ. There's always collateral damage whenever you two are involved. Whenever you two craft ideas, we end up in the crossfire. Like your... performance, that no doubt started the downfall of Mondstadt."

Alternatively: Furina's planning to build a summer home in Mondstadt. Kaeya informs the newlyweds. Naturally, Diluc raises some concerns.

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(coauthored with @darkluminosity)

"Well, in the spirit of Windblume, I’ve found an interesting way for us to spend the evening." Looking at Kaeya and Eula, she continues with an endearing smile. "Since our partners are more on the— ahem, reserved side, we can get to know one another better this way. Especially since it does involve alcohol…" Jean chooses this moment to chime in. "Lisa, Eula, Kaeya, why did you bring us all here?" "Well," Kaeya answers, "that's simple. All of you need to socialize more, and it’s Windblume. What better time, honestly?" Albedo, so quietly under his breath to the point where his words very nearly go unnoticed: "This is going to go horribly wrong, isn’t it?"

Alternatively: In the spirit of Windblume, Lisa, Eula, and Kaeya decide to drag Jean, Diluc, and Albedo to the Angel's Share for drinks and an innocent game of truth or dare—a triple date, in other words. Chaos ensues, naturally; with this group, why wouldn't it?

You guys really like making me work, huh.

But let's just get one thing clear: the Kids know what a good dad looks like because Diluc has given them that. So them seeing how Crepus treated Diluc would kill them. Because of the way Diluc talks about his father, they thought Diluc had learned his loving naturing character from his father, but it was more like Diluc had learned what not to do.

Diona would be literally plotting murder. While Bennett probably trying to get her and Razor under control, Fischl trying to pull Diluc away, and Klee pulls the boss move and cries to her mom.

Which I feel. Alice is final boss material if you hurt her kid's feelings.

Now, for the Harem, we are gonna speed run this because a lot of them are very protective.

Albedo: He's calling Alice again.

Al Haitham: Make Crepus cry with a brutally honest review of Crepu's own parenting or something else he's proud of.

Ayato: Probably takes something exceedingly hurtful that Crepus said and turns it against him. Definitely has people stalking Crepus and making him as uncomfortable as physically possible.

Childe: Diluc probably has to physically hold him from stabby time

Eula: Definitely plots her revenge. A way for Crepus to publicly embarrass himself. Or explode his poor parenting to the public.

Itto: Crepus gets in Ushi to the face.

Kaveh: Probably shouts at Crepus and explains how Diluc is perfect.

Thoma: I'm pretty sure Thoma's disappointment is lethal to anyone

Xiao: Xiao normally doesn't care about mortal but it honestly would be stabby time v2.

*At the library*

Lisa: *reading a book while drinking some tea*

Diluc: *walks in*

Lisa: Oh, what a surprise. Good afternoon master Diluc, what do I owe this visit? Are you perhaps interested in a book?

Diluc: Not today lisa. I actually came for you.

Lisa: Fufufu, you flatter me master Diluc, but I'm afraid I am already taken.

Diluc: *Deadpan* I'm aware, Kaeya won't shut up about it.

Lisa: *chuckles*

Diluc: But no, I'm here because I need a potion.

Lisa: I see. What kind of potion?

Diluc: A cryo resistance one.

Lisa: A cryo resistance potion? Are you perhaps planning to explore dragonspine?

Diluc: It doesn't matter. Can you do it?

Lisa: Of course, that's a simple one.

Diluc: *hands her a pouch if mora* I'll pay in advance for the materials.

Lisa: Hmm, I believe that's a bit much for one cryo resistance potion.

Diluc: *turns around to leave* Then keep the change and use it for other potions you might need to make.

Lisa: Aren't you generous? Well, it won't take long, you can come pick up by the end of the day.

Diluc: Thank you lisa.

Lisa: You're welcome *notices something on his neck* and. . . .you might want to check those scratches.

Diluc: I'm aware of them. I was. . . .jumped by a cat.

Lisa: To jump you and leave such nasty marks, was the cat named diona? *Chuckles*

Diluc: Try not to dwell too much on that topic. I'll be back by the end of the day.

Lisa: Understood. Have a good day master Diluc.

Diluc: *leaves*

Lisa: Now, where did I put my mixer. . . . *Looking around* hmm. . . .I probably left it back on-

Eula: *walks in*

Lisa: Oh, Good afternoon Eula, what can I do for you? Interested in another novel?

Eula: I actually haven't finished the last one.

Lisa: Pity, your work really does take your time, doesn't it?

Eula: Of course it does, but it is also an important duty that I must devote myself to.

Lisa: *chuckles* You talked just like Jean now.

Eula: *crosses arms* humph, me and the acting grandmaster are nothing a like.

Lisa: Of course. . . *Notices a few faint bruises on her neck and thighs* Did you have a rough day? You could always ask Barbara to take a look at those.

Eula: T-that won't be necessary, i. . . .Just got ambushed by a group of hilichurls while I was distracted looking at my map. Those will heal soon enough.

Lisa: I see. Well, if you don't want a book, what can I do for you then?

Eula: Well. . . .i came to request a potion.

Lisa: Well, you're in luck, master Diluc came by not long ago and donated some money for me to make some potions.

Eula: he did?

Lisa: yes.

Eula: *under her breath* Bastard, I'll be sure to take my revenge for that.

Lisa: What was that?

Eula: Nothing, don't concern yourself with that.

Lisa: If you say so. Well then, what kind of potion do you need? I have potions to decrease fatigue, increase energy, relax your body and-

Eula: I would like a fire resistance potion.

Lisa: . . . . . . .

Eula: Can you do it?

Lisa: *smirks*

Eula: W-why are you giving me that look!?

Lisa: No reason really, I just find quite funny how master diluc asked for a cryo resistance potion not too long ago, and Now you're asking for a Pyro resistance one.

Eula: T-that is but a coincidence, stop looking so much into it.

Lisa: The curious marks you both have are also a coincidence?

Eula: *pink* . . . . .Could you just make the potion?

Lisa: Of course. Should I add a contraceptive potion to the request too~?

Eula: *red* That is quite enough! Such humiliation will be met with a cold revenge!

Lisa: *chuckles* Relax, I'm just kidding with you. Your potion will be ready by the end of the day.

Eula: T-thank you. Good afternoon. *Walks away*

Lisa: Are you coming to pick it up or should I just hand them to master Diluc?

Eula: *redder, slams door behind her*

Lisa: *chuckles*

Jean: *walks upstairs with a book in hand* What is going on?

Lisa: Oh nothing important, just finding out some interesting things.

Jean: Like?

Lisa: Apparently our spindrift knight and the uncrowned king of mondstadt are having a little affair.

Jean: W-why do you say that?

Lisa: Master Diluc came here to ask for a cryo resistance potion, and not long after Eula came to ask for a Fire resistance, both having quite. . . .suspicious marks.

Jean: Oh. . . .

Lisa: I know right? Oh if people heard about that.

Jean: Errr lisa?

Lisa: Yes?

Jean: I forgot to ask you earlier. Since you're brewing potions, could you make some for me?

Lisa: Of course. *Grins* What do you want? Cryo or Pyro resistance? *Chuckles*

Jean: Both, actually.

Lisa: . . . . . . . *Notices a few scratch marks and bruises on her*

Jean: *pink* . . . . . .

Lisa: . . . . . . *Massive smirk*

Jean: *red* Please have mercy, i really need the potions.

Lisa: Ask for mercy to the gods, because there's nothing on teyvat that would make me pass this opportunity.

Aether,bar clothes:*shakes canister*

Diluc:There ya go.

Kaeya:When will the drinks be re-

Eula:Shhhhh shut the fuck up!

Amber:Do not rush the show.