#enderqueer

i am going to give advice here that not many transfems would agree with i think but it is something i feel deeply about and have textual evidence from the person who coined the term to support my belief historically but there isnt actually a requirement of agab or "positionality" in order to be transfem

jane nance the person who first coined the term (as far as anyone knows) made the label for herself and others because she was gatekept from other community terms at the time she very openly offered up her label to the world as an attempt to solve a lack of expansive terminology in the community for people like her who didnt feel they had a space to describe themselves in our community she actually believes the one thing the term in fact strictly requires is an undefined relationship to sex reassignment the term necessitates a level of fluidity and vagueness

i think it might not exactly explicitly fit the letter of her word (largely because the language we use today to talk about sex and gender is wildly different than back then) but rather i think it does fit the spirit of her word to say that transfem is a word that fits you to the extent you define it if you are trans and feminine i believe nance would support you calling yourself transfem no matter your agab whether that means your gender identity is femme or your gender expression is femme

(in fact as someone heavily involved in the transvestite community in the 70s i think nance would be more accepting in those regards than many trans people today in that she was in the community at a time in which there was no assumed hierarchy of validity between feminine men and amab women)

all that to say if your cohost is trans and fem and feels the term transfem fits it then it is not in any way intruding on transfem spaces rather it is the spaces that need to be able to make room for it if those spaces are unwelcoming to it and i believe we all need to do that work to create this future

Yeah so the bots got to me, lost my art account that I worked hard to keep up , but im back angels!!! what happened really tore me down had a really bad crisis and refused to return to tumblr for awhile!!! However I dont givenup easy and WILL get my account back no matter what!!

For the new angels, Im Casket, Nuance or Cryptid.

Pronouns are they/them and vae/vem!

yes i agree??? ive made very many posts on this matter in fact i think??? devoid of context the reason it may be read that i believe in any way something different is that i have as i do with many things a fairly nuanced take on the matter

being perceived as cis and gender conforming can result in one being treated with all of the societal benefits that cis people are privileged with but this is not the same as saying that cis passing trans people have these same privileges

especially as once a cis passing trans person is revealed to not be cis those benefits are quickly and swiftly stripped of them and often they face direct negative repercussions for the perceived sin of "deceit"

i think in many instances the way many people talk about these issues muddies the waters because people often equate benefits of a patriarchal system with Privileges provided to them and in those instances i think it is useful to examine the way in which a person is using the word privilege whether it be a Privilege or a privilege as there are in some ways benefits of talking about benefits in a way that uses the framing of privilege even when we arent discussing systemic Privilege for instance id argue there are benefits of living in a patriarchal society given to people who are not the intended recipient of the systemic Privilege that are largely discussed and understood under this concept of "male privilege"

the concept of male Privilege is fundamentally flawed on the face of it because what it typically describes isnt SIMPLY "male" Privilege often in fact its white perisex cis man Privilege but the ways in which this framework exists and is something people are largely aware of does at times lend itself to some confusion about the matter

for instance if i a trans woman who hasnt legally changed my name put in an application for a job under my legal name the odds are higher that i will get the interview and this too is an aspect of passing privilege because on its face it is almost one of the first most easily accessible examples often used to explain the concept of "male Privilege" ie. the rate at which male names on applications are more likely to be picked by recruiters for pretty much any job across the board and you could argue i am thus privileged by my sex but its a flawed thought because it is NOT a systemic Privilege and when i show up with tits dressed like the tranny i am suddenly i am no longer benefited by my deadname and in fact i will be less likely to get the job when they find out i am trans because i "deceived them" (unfortunately the inverse is true as well if i put in an application under my chosen name they will perceive me as deceitful should they do a background check and again im less likely to get the job its a catch 22)

but this incredibly limited "privilege" isnt just an aspect of cis passing privilege either if youre a person of color but have a name thats perceived to be white youre again more likely to get an interview but less likely to get the job once they discover you arent white

and it can and i feel should be argued that if a "privilege" is so deeply limited that it can be taken away at a moments notice then it definitionally is not a privilege

all of that said!!! it is important i think when engaging with people about systemic and structural oppression to realize when people have different definitions on things

especially as the average person is not so knowledgeable on the intricacies of the ways in which people discuss systemic oppression many people have a very baseline idea of these discussions based on what has seeped into the cultural mainstream

"male privilege" as a concept heavily conflated with any benefits conditional or otherwise from the patriarchy rewarded to those perceived as men is a popular idea of this framework that is very mainstream and generally understood by most despite its fundamental flaws

if someone says trans men have "male Privilege" it is fully possible they believe that trans men are treated no different in society than cis men and that theyre given all of the same systemic benefits and theyre wrong just flat out i mean again not even all males have "male Privilege" but there are instances i feel when people speak of trans people having ie. "male privilege" wherein they are simply misunderstanding the concept of Privilege entirely and are conflating the fringe and highly conditional benefits of "passing" with the concept of systemic Privilege something that is almost definitely more likely because of the ways in which this fundamentally flawed framework of "male privilege" in pop culture has become so muddied

if we are to be able to actually educate and inform people about the ways in which systemic oppression affects people it is a useful skill to be able to recognize which situation is which and explain these concepts in a way that makes sense to either ill informed party without having a knee jerk reaction to the usage of the word in a context it doesnt belong in

[Image ID: 2 6-striped flags. They are the same flag, but the one on the left has an end portal overlay, which makes it darker with lighter rectangular speckles. Colors on the right's, in descending order, are: pink; light purple; dark purple; black; dark teal-blue; slightly dark sea green. The right has darkened versions of these same colors. End ID.]

My own blankqueer label. I've been wanting to make one for a while. Name and flag based on the End dimension from Minecraft.

Core principles of Enderqueer:

The core principles of Enderqueer are as follows

The right to self identification with little restrictions and rules.

Inclusion of non-harmful identities in the communities they say they belong to.

Respecting the identities of people even if you do not understand.

Giving everyone a chance to explain their identity before deeming it harmful; as well as respecting someone's choice to not explain and assuming good faith rather than passing judgement.

Putting experiences over definitions; allowing all labels to have outliers if they're comfortable with the label even when it doesn't fit them perfectly.

Queer liberation and the advancements of our rights.

Destroying heteronormativity, cisnormativity, exorsexism, intersexism, allonormativity, amatonormativity, and mononormativity (all 3 meanings of mono: monosexuality, monogenderism, and monogamy).

Enderqueer beliefs:

On identity, enderqueer believes the following

Most forms of self identification are valid, however anything that is identified with for harmful reasons (such as transphobia, biphobia/multiphobia, homophobia, ableism, racism, etc.) or things that are harmful regardless of reason (such as transabled, transrace for non-adoptees, transnazi, shit like that), are not valid.

It is okay to ask questions about identities you don't understand or think are harmful before fully accepting them without question. However, if a person doesn't want to answer, that is their right, and it doesn't give you the right to argue against or hate their identity. Assume good faith and maybe ask others who have similar identities.

Identity is complicated and every label, regardless of definition, can and will have outliers, and this is not a problem

Experiences and personal comforts are more important than definitions

All mspec identities are valid and are not biphobic

All aspecs are queer unless the aspec person in particular says they aren't.

All Polyamory, ambiamory, and other nonmonogamy is queer unless the polyam/non-monogam person in particular says they are not queer.

Redundant terms are okay

Multigendered and genderfluid people are "really" their genders. The existence of their other genders or the temporary nature of their genders don't make them less real

On paraphilias, enderqueer believes the following

Paraphilias are morally neutral. Paraphiles who's paraphilias are nonconsensual or harmful to themselves or others deserve support and recovery, and paraphiles who's paraphilias are not harmful should be allowed to act on it. Paraphilias that can either be harmful or not harmful should only be practiced in a safe and ethical way.

On flag discourse, enderqueer believes the following

Flags should not be gatekept from certain groups unless they are specific to one identity or one group of identities. people can decide to use your flags based on your beliefs.

Controversial original flags can be used regardless of if you agree with the creators, but replacement flags should not be used by people who don't agree with the sentiments behind the cancellation. Racist transphobes should not use the orange and pink lesbian flag. Mspec lesbians and supporters should not use the new pan or aroace flags. This is because the new flags have a goal: punish the original creator for a belief by replacing their work. Using replacement flags is accomplishing that goal, and if you agree with the original creator, you shouldn't punish them.

Multioriented and abrosexual people are "really" their orientations. The existence of their other orientations or the temporary nature of their orientations don't make them less real

Other things enderqueer believes the following

Queer labels should not concern themselves with non-queer issues, as that is a different part of one's identity. Making queer labels that concern themselves with non-queer issues excludes the people who are either uneducated on the topic or have no business voicing the opinion because they are not a part of the community or even adjacent.

Gender is real. Social constructs are powerful things that can cause real and observable phenomenon in the brain, and gender being real doesn't invalidate any funky gender identity

Gender Abolition is transphobic. Gender is the identity, and taking away gender leaves nothing but biological sex which may still allow binary trans people to exist if they experience dysphoria but will definitely erase all nondysphoric and nonbinary people.

Transmisogyny and transmisandry are real

POC queers are an unremovable and important part of the queer community

What does enderqueer explicitly support?

Enderqueer supports the following identities, actions, or forms of identification:

Unlabeled identities

People who use few labels for themselves

Termcollectors and labelhoarders

All aspecs, including loveless aros, any sex stance for aces, romance stance for aros, friendship stance for apls, etc, and atertiaries

Anti-contact, pro-recovery paraphiles who's paraphilias are harmful to themselves or others

Paraphiles who's paraphilias are not harmful to themselves or others

Paraphiles who's paraphilias can be harmful or can be safe who only act on them in a way that is safe and ethical

Mspec monos

Mspec gays, veldians, lesbians, cenelians, enbians, straights, etc who do not consider themselves monos

Straightbians, straight gays, straight veldians, gaybians/velaurians, and other labels often used by multigender people

Lesboys, turigirls, ceneliboys and ceneligirls, enbiboys and enbigirls, trixiboys and trixigirls, and toriboys and torigirls

Any other form of "contradictory" labels

Aspec and non-aspec SAM

Xenogenders

Xenidens, or xenoids used in reclamation

Allion orientations

Gender nonconformity, including pronoun nonconformity

Neurolabels, when used by people who have those conditions

Reclamation of slurs and derogatory terms, even when used as an identity

Transracial adoptees

Transspecies therians

Transage chronosian or transage age regressors

What does enderqueer explicitly denounce?

Enderqueer denounces the following identities, actions, or forms of identification:

Radqueers

Winterqueers or Winterpunks

Transidentities that are not transgender, transrace adoptees, therian transspecies, or chronosian/agere transage

Pro-contact harmful paraphilias or neu-contact harmful paraphilias. This also applies to unethical or unsafe ways of acting on a paraphilia that can be done in a safe, ethical way

Comp-contact for paraphilias that can never be safe or ethical in practice

Anti-recovery for ANY paraphilias. Nonharmful paraphiles may choose to recover anyway

Anti-contact for paraphilias that are never dangerous or unethical

Radical feminists

Not recognizing attraction to elsegender people as being just as real and valid as attraction to aptobinary people. This includes calling all exclusive lesbians monosexual, saying all sexualities inherently include elsegender people, thinking enbians are choosing to date nonbinary people or cenelians are choosing not to date aptobinary people, rather than recognizing that they are attracted to other elsegender people, potentially exclusively, or calling WLN and MLN labels transphobic or enbyphobic

Bad faith labels such as superstraight, quasihomosexual, animesexual (though animesexual can be reclaimed by fictosexuals), and others made to mock queerness or justify bigotry

What is enderqueer neutral on, or what does enderqueer not believe needs to be part of a blankqueer label?

Enderqueer is stanceless on the following:

Syscourse

Shipcourse

Self diagnosis

Furries

Alterhumanity (OP supports and it's close to queer discourse but ultimately I decided it was far enough removed that it didn't need to be included)

Engaging with problematic media and/or creators

Kink at pride (I know this one is super relevant but I don't have any strong opinions and the ones I do have are very mixed)