#ediary

Day 2 / 100

Did quite the lot, a little burnt out. Honestly, can studying make you dumber? For some reason the past month, I thought the occasional (increasingly common) coffee was fine AFTER brushing my teeth. Don’t ask how I rationalized that. Maybe I thought since it was a liquid…. Who knows. Stupidity at its peak — well, anyways, I think I have cavities now.

- signed, a desperate schoolgirl

// trying out some new things around my island entrance, experimenting with different fencing and started a small garden to sell for income by my house in acnh today!

summer time is here ! 🌞🔮🪬

𓆩⟡𓆪

just finished my first year at uni now i am back home for the summer ! i met so many fun and interesting people that have helped me to step into a new stage of my life; one that is healing, focused and open. i have nothing planned for the summer except going to my boys house for a week so that’ll be exciting ! i’ll be sure to post pics of the place, i heard there’s a lot of tree areas so i can meditate and be my lil witchy self in the woods hehe . i think i’ll bring some sewing supplies too so we can be all cosy and stuff :)

my strawberries are starting to grow and my darling girl is having kittens! along with the pattern of deers i’m seeing everywhere i’m seeing this as sign to embrace the change that is to come .

happy pride month!

anyways, here’s some horsies and my kitty!! hope ur summer is going well i’m thinking of you <3

I've picked up journaling over the past week again! One of my favorite pastimes is reading through my completed journals from years ago, and want to have more of that reflection in the future! If you're not journaling, I highly encourage you to try it out. Its a great way to wind down and silence repetitive thoughts, which is also really nice since my obsessive compulsive diagnosis ᡣ𐭩

I AM MADE OF WORDS

---And built with it. There’s just so many of them. For a quiet person, I have too much to say. And I didn’t even realize it until I wrote an entry last night. I was writing paragraphs after paragraphs after paragraphs about how I felt. I just didn’t reveal everything in my last post because some of it were getting very personal. My last post was the most conscise version of what I wrote, trust me. But really. I have a lot to say. As an introvert, this fact gnaws at me because I cannot get all these words out to just about anyone directly. Perhaps this is why I’m writing right now. And I’m thankful for this platform. At least here, I get to say what I want to indirectly. I don’t even think anyone would read this. But the thought of spilling all the words in me, here, is assuring. Satisfying. 

Because, doesn’t it bother you---that, with all the words living inside us, once we're gone, they become trapped, frozen, and forgotten? There’s probably too many words than there is time. 

Diary of a Desperate Schoolgirl

I hope to get at least over three hours of studying today, actual studying, none of that “timer-on-but-phone-in-hand” fake shit that deludes me into thinking I’ve been productive for hours but effectively regressed my brain.