#dontsettle

Outside of scenes your partner should empower you for the strong person you are and not make you feel less. Never silence your voice and don't be afraid to advocate for your feeling and your needs.

If someone has the audacity to get made at you for asserting your boundaries and doesn't respect your feelings, then tell that piece of garbage to fucking kick rocks.

Kink should be safe, sane and consensual! You should never feel pressured to do anything your not ready for or don't want to do. NO is a full sentence and should be respected, and anything going on during a scene should be discussed prior to playing. I've read to many horror stories about people being in subspace and being talking into things their not comfortable with, that is extremely disgusting behavior and very predatory.

Over the last few days I've come across and have talked to so many people who have encountered dangerous people in the community. Consent is key and even if you identify as a submissive role you have power, you have a say in what happens and how it happens and you also set your expectations for what YOU need. If you need specific aftercare do not settle for anything less and ways assert your limit and boundaries. Kink should be fun not abusive and traumatizing.

Stay safe and be that bad ass you are

And stop letting fake doms get away with bullshit, tell that Christian Grey mother fucker to kick rocks and find a play partner that values who you are as a person and not just what you can give them.

Stairways in hospitals.  They are the same everywhere.  Hot, muggy and with random locked doors.  It’s a strange constant in an otherwise new beginning. I reach the 5th floor and open it, letting the air conditioning roll over me.  I glance at my list and head towards the room.

I quit bedside nursing.  I tucked into a graduate program in 2019, finished and landed a job.  I left bedside for more reasons than I can count but the main one is a little over 3 feet tall with shiny red hair and deep brown eyes. I told myself for 11 years in the ICU that when I became a mom I would leave bedside nursing.  I don’t regret it. Not even a little.

I now work as a nurse practitioner in a bustling community hospital about 25 minutes from the downtown hospital I spent so many years in. My specialty is something I would have never picked and yet do not regret one day.  I spend my days talking about pancreatitis, cirrhosis and GI bleeds.  I can explain entire procedures that I had never heard of before a year ago.  It’s a strange existence. Both harder and easier than my prior career.

Maybe when my son is older I will find something else. Something that takes me back to the excitement of ICU or cardiac. But I doubt it wholly.  I’m home every weekend and only work 4 days a week.  I’m off by 5:30 and never work nights or holidays. 

Someone who chooses you every day.