#divides

James

► he keep wanting to text you—good news, bad news, dumb thoughts. His thumb hovers. He doesn’t always send it, but the urge itself is loud. He just always wants to speak to you, even if he’s busy.

For him, yearning shows up as a constant impulse to share his life with you. Not in a dramatic, overwhelming way—but in a steady, instinctive one. You’re the person his mind turns to in the in-between moments, the pauses in his day where he gets to breathe and think.

When he’s on a break from practice, you’re the first person he wants to tell. Not because anything huge happened, but because you matter enough to be included in the small details. He wants you to know how it went, how he felt, what he’s thinking afterward.

When he’s traveling for a concert, he keeps you updated—when he’s heading out, when he arrives, when he’s finally settled. It’s not about obligation; it’s about comfort. Letting you know where he is makes the distance feel smaller, like you’re still part of his world even when you’re not physically there.

After the concert, he wants to tell you everything. The energy, the crowd, the moments that stood out, the feelings that are still buzzing in his chest. You’re not just someone he reports to—you’re someone he relives it with.

And just as much as he wants to talk, he wants to listen. He hopes you’ll do the same. He loves hearing about your day, even the ordinary parts, because your voice grounds him. Calling you just to hear you—no agenda, no label, no pressure—feels natural. Even if you’re not dating, the connection is real. You’re the person he wants to stay tethered to, no matter how busy or far away he is.

That’s yearning for James: choosing you, again and again, in the quiet moments where nothing forces him to—he just wants to.

Juhoon

► he’s fine… technically. But everything reminds him of you in small, annoying ways—your favorite song, a phrase you used, the way his phone lights up not with your name.

yearning shows up in the way you’ve quietly woven yourself into his everyday life. You’re not always on his mind on purpose—but you’re there anyway, slipping in through the smallest moments.

One of the other members might casually bring up a show you like, and before he even realizes it, an automatic smile spreads across his face. It catches him off guard every time. He doesn’t mean to react that way, and sometimes he wishes he didn’t—but his body gives him away. You’ve become something warm and familiar to him, something that shows up without asking.

Juhoon hates that you have that kind of effect on him… and at the same time, he loves it. There’s frustration in knowing you’re able to shift his mood so easily, but there’s also comfort in it. You make things brighter for him, even when you’re not there, and that’s hard to resent for long.

He adds your favorite song to his playlist, telling himself it’s no big deal. But when it finally comes on, he lets it play again and again. He doesn’t skip it. He doesn’t rush it. He just sits with it, letting the melody pull memories of you to the surface—your voice, your laugh, the way you made him feel in that moment. The song becomes less about the music and more about you.

And when he sees things that remind him of you—something you’d like, something that fits your taste—he buys it for himself. Not because he needs it, but because having it nearby makes you feel closer. Every time he uses it or looks at it, he thinks of you, like it’s a small, private reminder that you exist in his world in ways he can’t easily undo.

That’s the yearning Juhoon doesn’t always admit to: you lingering in his life through smiles he didn’t plan, songs he can’t skip, and objects that quietly hold your presence. You’re there even when he’s trying to act like he’s fine—and that’s what makes it so powerful.

Martin

► He imagine moments that haven’t happened yet and feel sad you’re not there—trips, jokes, inside references that don’t exist without you.

For Martin, yearning lives in the future he keeps picturing with you—moments that haven’t happened, but feel vivid and real anyway. His mind drifts there without warning, building scenes he didn’t plan to imagine but can’t seem to stop.

He pictures the simple things first. Walking side by side, hands brushing and then naturally intertwining. Wandering through stores with no real purpose, pointing things out, laughing, stealing glances at each other. Hugging for a little longer than necessary, just because it feels right. Spending time together without needing a reason—just being close, just existing in the same space.

But the thought that stays with him the most is being in the studio with you late at night. The world quiet, the lights low, just the two of you creating something together. Sharing headphones, trading ideas, feeding off each other’s energy. In that imagined moment, it doesn’t feel rushed or forced—it feels easy, like you belong there with him. That thought alone is enough to make him wish you were already part of his everyday life, so moments like that wouldn’t have to stay imaginary.

Sometimes the weight of those thoughts hits him unexpectedly. Wanting you there so badly it almost hurts—not because he’s unhappy, but because he can see how good it could be. He doesn’t just miss you as you are; he misses the version of life where you’re woven into everything he loves.

Even during his concerts, when the lights are bright and the crowd is loud, you find your way into his thoughts. In the middle of the performance, he’ll catch himself wondering what it would be like if you were there—standing in the crowd, watching him, sharing that moment with him. The idea sends a rush through him. His energy lifts. He performs harder, fuller, like the thought of you alone is enough to fuel him.

That’s the kind of yearning this is: not just missing someone, but imagining a future with them so clearly that it starts to feel like something he’s already lost. You’re not only part of his present thoughts—you’re part of the life he keeps reaching toward, hoping one day it won’t just live in his head.

Seonghyeon

► he meet new people, but part of him is constantly measuring: “Would y/n laugh at this?” “Would they get this the way that she did?”

For him, yearning shows up in the way you’ve quietly become his internal reference point. No matter who he’s with or how social the moment is, part of his mind is always filtering things through you.

He’ll be sitting at a table with the other members, relaxed, joking around, when someone says something funny. He laughs—but not just because the joke landed. He laughs because, in his head, he can already imagine your reaction. The way you’d laugh at it, the comment you’d probably add, the look you’d give him afterward. Sometimes he realizes he’s smiling more at the thought of you laughing than at the joke itself.

Every now and then, he lets an inside joke slip. Something that only makes sense in the world the two of you share. When no one reacts—when the table stays quiet or confused—he doesn’t even feel embarrassed. He just shrugs it off with a small smile and says, “Y/n would get it.” And he means it. You understand him in a way that doesn’t need explaining, and moments like that remind him how rare that kind of connection is.

Even when he meets someone new, your presence lingers in his thoughts. He doesn’t compare them to you outright—but he wonders. Would you like them? Would you feel comfortable around them? Would they fit into the version of life he imagines when you’re in it? Your opinion matters to him, even when you’re not there to give it.

That’s the quiet ache of this kind of yearning: you’ve become his measure for familiarity, comfort, and understanding. He’s not actively trying to look for you in other people—but he notices when they don’t quite match the way you made him feel. And in those moments, he realizes that no matter how full the room is, there’s still a space that only you ever seem to fill.

Keonho

► It’s physical before it’s logical—tight chest, heavy stomach, a sigh he didn’t plan. His body misses you even when his brain is trying to be normal.

Keonho’s yearning isn’t something he thinks through—it’s something his body reacts to before he has any control over it. You don’t have to be in the room to affect him; sometimes just the idea of you is enough to set everything off.

The moment he thinks about you, there’s a restless energy that takes over. His thoughts speed up, his focus slips, and he feels almost jittery, like his system has been thrown slightly off balance. When a text from you comes in, his heart jumps instantly—no warning, no preparation. It doesn’t matter how calm he was a second ago; your name alone is enough to make his pulse spike.

Hearing your voice does the opposite. Where everything else makes him nervous or wired, you calm him in a way nothing else really can. The sound of you grounds him. His breathing slows, his shoulders relax, and for a moment, everything feels steadier. Even if he’s stressed or overwhelmed, talking to you makes the noise in his head quiet down.

Being around you is a whole different experience. His face heats up without him meaning to, his palms get sweaty, and he becomes painfully aware of himself—how close you are, how he’s standing, what he’s saying. It’s uncomfortable and thrilling at the same time. His body reacts like it’s nervous, but his instincts keep pulling him closer anyway.

That’s the contradiction he can’t escape: you make him flustered, exposed, and unsteady—yet you’re exactly where he wants to be. Even when his nerves are shot and his heart won’t slow down, he still chooses you. Again and again. Because despite the anxiety, there’s something about being near you that feels right, like his body recognizes you as someone important long before his mind is ready to admit it.

That’s the physical side of yearning—the way someone can live under your skin, turning simple moments into reactions you can’t hide, no matter how hard you try.