Tears*Made For Good

It’s times like these that I wish I wasn’t a woman; especially middle aged on top of it. *sigh* I’m already perimenopausal at 41. 😖 Those PMS systems are with me everyday now, and usually a one week out of the month it’s set to hydraulic mode. Dear Lord, save me from myself! I thought living with PMDD was already on level "extra-hard". 🤮

Two weeks have pasted on hydraulic intensity already, and finally the symptoms have subsided. This is a rare accordance for it to last this long. My mood & mind had been chaotic, it took everything in me to keep myself somewhat steady. There's no way I could've gotten through it on my own. I truly give all the credit to God. It is He who gave me the strength to get through each day cause I battled with multiple downers and exhaustion. By making sure that I was always surrounded by His Presence through reading/hearing His Word. Like through worship music, sermon podcasts or rewatching the christian media like "The Chosen" or "The Promise land" series. It all helps more then one may think! 🥰

I took a small step forward today to sell some handmade creations online. They’re hair accessories for dreadlocks and thick hair called “Spiral Loc” hair ties. Made with a double wire skeleton, they’re designed for all-day wear. 😁👍 Listed on my Vinted store under “torchchild”.

Clink Link to visit my store:

https://www.vinted.com/member/3148727199-torchchild

(listing on Vinted)

This is how God wants the church to share His Love to a Broken & Hurting World!

I wish I’d posted an update much sooner, but here’s where I’m currently at on this very special art commission. 🥰 I had to take a long break after the first two weeks of hardcore production into early May. It was far more mentally taxing than I originally thought it would be, but in the big picture it made sense. This project has provided the perfect opportunity to formulate a brand new creative process and art-style of my own, with God as my close Collaborator & Inspiration. 💖✝️

In the previous blog post, I gave a clue to the topic/theme of this piece which was “revelations”. 💫 I’ll continue to leave ya’ll with that same clue. It may not be any help to you or it maybe reveal everything to you. I wish to keep some form of mystery until I get to do the final reveal! 😉👍

As you can see in the pic below, now it’s clear to the actual scale of the art piece. On a 36x36 stretched canvas. The felt pieces I created are temporarily pinned onit for now. There’s so much to add till it’s fully complete. I promise it’ll be so worth the wait! I become more confident & excited every time I share about it. 🌟

Our family trip to Cali was really enjoyable, but I was ready to return home by the end. We all surely needed alone time from one another. 😔 Usually we don't have that much together-ness time for a full busy week. So there was some minor drama. Especially when one has a very independent, preteen. 😖 The Lord continues to help my hubby and I greatly in giving us His wisdom, strength and patience. Of course, small mistakes were made as parents. Overall things got resolved quickly. As a step mom of 4 yrs, I'm still needing to teach my preteen son a few basic things that are commonly taught to 4-6 yr olds. It's truly to no fault of his own, my hubby did his very best in raising him alone the first 7 yrs. of his life. I think it just still surprises me how debilitating it is to raise a child. Sadly even more when it's anyone with emotional baggage. I love and care for my son so deeply. Striving to stay calm and collect in stressful situation is taxing on anyone. So yeah, my quaint little family is frequently in an overstimulating state. 😵‍💫 Jesus is still totally at the wheel tho! Lol Soon now after a week back at home, I finally feel mentally & physically rested. It was very difficult to keep a "complete" quiet space for an introvert to properly recharge from two extroverts under the same roof. 😝 Sweet Jesus gives me true rest and comfort when I desperately need it. Thank you, Lord!

(update to previous post HERE)

Oh how nice this family trip has been! 🥰 Praise God, that he’s been so helping me with my anxiety. So I’m able to better relax and enjoy my family, included extended fam. 💖 Only two days left of the trip and we’ve visited Monterey and Santa Cruz. Then tomorrow with be a full day in San Francisco. I humbly prayer this trip ends on a very cool and upbeat note. Be with my hubby, son and myself. Thank you so much Lord for my loving & generous parents to bring us on this trip w/ them. Yes, there has been emotional bumps on the way, but those are to be expected. I’ll keep choosing to not dwell over them. I choose joy and peace through Jesus! 😊 And I pray that my family will too experience the Lord in the matter. In Jesus Name! Amen

I Am So Blessed 💖

06.14.2026

(image on pinterest HERE)

*venting post*

It's been about a month since I last had my hormone therapy meds, and....Oh I'm feeling the lack of it. It was due to pharmaceutical issues that prevented me from getting my refills on-time. I'll finally be getting them this week tho. 😪 These past fews days, I noticed how highly irritable I've been. Which is very out-of-ordinary for me. Then I recalled how likely it's linked to the missing med that helps with my menopause symptoms. Menopause = Modwenna. Code name for that life-altering, hormonal change in biological women. 😠 I honestly wish it was gone about 20+ years ago! What I mean is that I've been living with hormonal issue for that length of a time already. Anywho.....an externally odd trigger almost literally pushed me over the edge with great intolerance. Even now I'm trying drown out the sound of it. A neighbor is playing mexican polka & ranchero country music from their working truck speakers in front of their house. What??? I know, I told you it was odd.