#danglinghearts

Babies are the absolute kiss of death for a couple in a soap.  Sorry, but they are.  It turns the parents into characters who are centred around their child or send them off to the nearest babysitter so they can be involved in whatever plot is going on.

So for that reason I want to see them go down a route that doesn’t involve babies and surrogates and all that stuff.  I don’t want them tied to a baby which means that either they become the worst parents ever or too boring for a soap and so we all get bored.  Gotta keep the drama high.

It’s two, three years down the line and Easy’s pretty well known thanks to his photography.  He’s got a good blog going too in which The Husband is a regular feature.

What?  He’s hot.  And he likes being in front of Easy’s camera.  Also it’s a running gag on the blog as to whether The Husband pictures are softcore sex pictures or not.

Easy’s asked to come do some talk around CSD to a bunch of LQBTQA+ kids.  It’s there he meets this boy, barely 14 or so, who’s not out and literally terrified to come out to his single dad because he knows how homophobic he is.  Like, hints at him already being violent so he pretty much knows the outcome.  Kid is also into art so there’s some bonding there between the two of them.  Easy offers an ear, some weekend work being his assistant, that sort of thing.  Dad of course finds out and hits the roof, nearly hitting Easy at him “corrupting” his son.

One drama leads to another, I can see Ringo getting involved and being ready to straight up murder the man who threatened his husband (there’s a new construction project starting next week.  Lots of concrete) but Easy talks him down.  The kid begs them to stay out of it and so they do but they make sure he has their numbers.

Kid calls at like 3am one morning.  Well, not the kid.  A nurse at the hospital because their nephew has been admitted after a fight.  They go and it’s clear he’s been beaten up by dad, not some random mugging as he claimed.  Dad found out his son isn’t straight and this is the outcome.  They support him when he calls the police and it all goes well on that end until the kid has to go into care.  He freaks, doesn’t want that, can’t be a non-straight kid in the system and he begs to stay with “Uncle” Easy.  It’s passed off as a familial relationship - Easy was (dead) mum’s childhood best friend and was always called “uncle” by the kid.  And that’s how they end up parenting an LGBTQA+ teen.

It could be less PSA about homophobic parents and see them fostering but basically I want to watch them have a family, not an apartment crammed with a pram and nappies and an off-screen recording of a baby crying.  There’s so little that can be done with them and I don’t want that to be their on-screen lives for years until the kid is interesting enough to have storylines.

But if this were fic…

Surrogacy all the way.  And Ringo would straight up argue that it had to be Easy’s (at least the first one which gets a raised eyebrow because that would suggest there will be more).  Every cent, every bonus, everything that can be economised on is and they put everything into getting the process underway.  They get ridiculously lucky on their first go and there’s months of planning and preparing and late nights with half-whispered dreams about what their lives will be like when they finally get to take their baby home.  

They decide on the surprise and are there for their daughter’s birth.  Ringo jokes that he’s glad she’s part Easy because last thing they need is someone similar to his sister…

She thrives and they’re tired and happy and they quickly realise they want more and so jump back in.  This time they opt for the “one from both” option to see what takes.  At the first scan they find three babies which is way too much for them to handle.  Just as they get their heads around literally doubling their family in one go the surrogate is rushed to hospital.  One of the babies has died but the other two seem to be doing well.

They’re scared to find out the genders of the babies because while their daughter is theirs it’s also blatantly obvious who’s her bio!dad.  They didn’t want that this time around, hence them both having one egg fertilised each so they don’t want to know if there’s two babies from one bio!dad left.  It’s pointed out that it’s the mother’s genetics which determine whether the egg divides (I literally had to Google that just now to find out) so it doesn’t naturally favour Ringo over Easy but they still don’t want to know.

Two boys are born but it’s a few weeks before they realise that they are non-identical.  This time it’s not so obvious to look at them to identify genetics, the donor egg genes have balanced out the clear traits of each father.  They don’t really want to know, the boys are theirs and they are a family, but it’s pointed out that one day it might be medically necessary to know.  So they get DNA tests done and when the results arrive the sealed letter is handed over to their lawyer to be filed away with wills and other responsible parent paperwork because unless there’s a medical need they don’t need to know the details of their family.

Their daughter absolutely rules over her brothers (Ringo’s influence) and she takes a stand at school against bullies (Easy’s influence).  She doesn’t sit still and is off travelling as soon as she’s old enough to buy her own tickets and freaks her fathers out by posting bungee jump pictures and photos of remote locations.

One of the boys starts his own business, almost by accident.  What started as a hobby to make money became a serious thing not long after school and suddenly he’s got business cards and a website and is actually hiring employees.

The other boy takes his time to find his place in the world, bounces around jobs and relationships.  He watches his sister marry, his brother move in with his partner, he’s the dutiful uncle and is happy just earning a wage to pay the bills.  He did well at school, better than his siblings, but he keeps his cards close to his chest.  Then one day he sits down with his family and he tells them that he’s finally completed his counselling course - specialising in surrogacy, miscarriage, and other pregnancy/birth related issues.  The story of his sibling was told to him and his brother as soon as they were old enough to understand - there was always an extra little present at birthdays and Christmas - and he’s always felt like he wanted to support others through it.  He didn’t want to say anything in case he failed - it took three attempts to get onto the course and it was hard going.

Ringo and Easy live a long and happy life, old men together with their kids and grandkids and one hell of a legacy that they create and raise from scratch.