#circleofsecurity

Common Parenting question: “If I have anxiety does that mean my child will not be securely attached?” I have anxiety. It’s more about whether you are able to process that anxiety or if it controls your parenting choices. That’s where reflection comes in. We all question ourselves and many of us have anxiety but if you usually feel like you really have no idea how to respond to your child and THAT gives you anxiety, like ALL the time… then you run the risk of your child having insecure attachment. Unfortunately, telling anxious people that their anxiety might be harmful to their kids does not help AT ALL. If you are someone who is questioning how much fear rules your parenting, you may have to be really brave and begin the reflection process. Remember reflection is not over analyzing and shaming yourself. It’s how we process all these complex parenting moments. Edited to add: Lots of questions on how to do this… it starts with learning how to engage in regular reflection practice, without shame and guilt. I discuss this further in my latest e-book Finding Your Calm: Responsive Parents Guide to Self-Regulation and Co-Regulation PRE-ORDER NOW AVAILABLE!! 1/2 Price when pre-ordered. That’s right! You can pre-order now for only 5$’s!! Then, on February 1st, the link will be emailed to you. Just make sure to include your email in your information when you purchase. I won’t be selling it at this price again. This is a very special offer, for my wonderful supporters who just can’t wait for this sequel to the Guide to Survival Mode Plans. Link in bio @responsive_parenting #responsiveparenting #jmilburn #parentingsupport #circleofsecurity #securebase #holdingspace #attachmenttheory #innerchildhealing #secureattachment #parenthood #motherhood #mentalhealth #parentlife #reflections #fatherhood #momlife #ptsd #childhood #secureattachment #anxiousattachment #letthembelittle #dailyparenting #childhoodmemories #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #mindfulness #selflove #innerpeace #simplychildren #honestmotherhood https://www.instagram.com/p/CZUPrc_LauT/?utm_medium=tumblr

“Well the world is a cruel place.” Resilience is not built by turning a home into a dress rehearsal for the cruel world. Resilience is built through creating a home that provides a sense of safety and security from the cruel world. When children see that unconditional love and acceptance are possible at home, they are more likely to carry those values into the world with them. That sense of security protects them, even outside the home. J. Milburn @responsive_parenting #responsiveparenting #jmilburn #resilience #senseofsecurity #circleofsecurity #loveprotects #lovinghome #unconditionallove #buildingtrust #peacefulparenting #gentleparenting #attachmentparenting #attachment #attachmenttheory #parenthood #childdevelopment #childdevelopmentspecialist #childhood #intuitiveparenting #instinctualparenting #parentlife #motherhood #parents #homesweethome #dadlife #kids #fatherhood #wonderfulplace #kidlife #familytime https://www.instagram.com/responsive_parenting/p/CXn9hh7LYkM/?utm_medium=tumblr

“Well the world is a cruel place.” Resilience is not built by turning a home into a dress rehearsal for the cruel world. Resilience is built through creating a home that provides a sense of safety and security from the cruel world. When children see that unconditional love and acceptance are possible at home, they are more likely to carry those values into the world with them. That sense of security protects them, even outside the home. J. Milburn @responsive_parenting #responsiveparenting #jmilburn #resilience #senseofsecurity #circleofsecurity #loveprotects #lovinghome #unconditionallove #buildingtrust https://www.instagram.com/p/CVbvLHWMDy5/?utm_medium=tumblr

Being a secure base One of the factors that impacts how safe our child feels in our presence is the confidence we have in our parenting choices. That does not mean a securely attached child has parents who always make the most ideal choices. Rather, they are able to recognize which choices they make that resonate with their parenting beliefs and which choices may have come from a more reactive place. A parent who lacks confidence in their choices, never sure if they made the “right” choice, may not provide the secure base their child needs to develop a secure attachment quality. Developing confidence in your own parenting abilities is not something that happens over night, so be patient with yourself. Deep reflection, inner child healing and a reconnection with your intuition is often part of the process. J. Milburn @responsive_parenting Common Parenting question: “If I have anxiety does that mean my child will not be securely attached?” I have anxiety. It’s more about whether you are able to process that anxiety or if it controls your parenting choices. That’s where reflection comes in. We all question ourselves and many of us have anxiety but if you usually feel like you really have no idea how to respond to your child and THAT gives you anxiety, like ALL the time… then you run the risk of your child having insecure attachment. Unfortunately, telling anxious people that their anxiety might be harmful to their kids does not help AT ALL. If you are someone who is questioning how much fear rules your parenting, you may have to be really brave and begin the reflection process. Remember reflection is not over analyzing and shaming yourself. It’s how we process all these complex parenting moments. Edited to add: Lots of questions on how to do this… it starts with learning how to engage in regular reflection practice, without shame and guilt. Become a Responsive Parenting Community Member on Patreon and join us on a year long reflection practice journey. Link in bio #responsiveparenting #jmilburn #parentingsupport #circleofsecurity #securebase #holdingspace #attachmenttheory #innerchildhealing #secureattachment #anxiousattachment #parentstress https://www.instagram.com/p/CTUef4ZnXS-/?utm_medium=tumblr

Being a secure base One of the factors that impacts how safe our child feels in our presence is the confidence we have in our parenting choices. That does not mean a securely attached child has parents who always make the most ideal choices. Rather, they are able to recognize which choices they make that resonate with their parenting beliefs and which choices may have come from a more reactive place. A parent who lacks confidence in their choices, never sure if they made the “right” choice, may not provide the secure base their child needs to develop a secure attachment quality. Developing confidence in your own parenting abilities is not something that happens over night, so be patient with yourself. Deep reflection, inner child healing and a reconnection with your intuition is often part of the process. J. Milburn @responsive_parenting Edited to add: Lots of questions on how to do this… it starts with learning how to engage in regular reflection practice, without shame and guilt. Become a Responsive Parenting Community Member on Patreon and join us on a year long reflection practice journey. Link in bio #responsiveparenting #jmilburn #parentingsupport #circleofsecurity #securebase #holdingspace #attachmenttheory #innerchildhealing #secureattachment #anxiousattachment #parentstress https://www.instagram.com/p/CQ4AggTnsa9/?utm_medium=tumblr