#bird model

Hey, there! So, I've known my primary for a while now (Badger Primary) but I've been a little bit all over the place with my secondary. Was hopin' for a little help.

The one I'm positive I'm not is a Lion Secondary. I have a Double Lion best friend, and I could NEVER be as blunt as she is, and I'd never tell her this, but I honestly wouldn't want to. Lol! Being honest is an incredibly important thing to be, but there's a difference, at least in my mind, between honesty and saying the first thing that comes to your mind without letting it go through at least a little editing first.

Gotta keep the intended audience in mind.

Yeah, not sounding like a Lion secondary. And I'm kind of thinking Deliberate secondary for you (Bird or Snake.) What you're doing doesn't actually seem *automatic.*

For Bird, there's a possibility. I'm seen as very anxious, and I find new situations pretty stressful.

I mean, anyone can be anxious... and especially if it's a VERY new situation - that can be a lot for anybody.

I love collecting knowledge, and I always have an assortment of fun facts at hand that I've tirelessly collected over the years. It's a fun thing for me, and I enjoy doing it. I was also seen as very "intellectual" in school (which I know is not a requirement for being a Bird or a clear indication of being one, but I figured I'd mention it.) Loved school and loved learning, and I still love learning in my adulthood.

The issue is that, when the chips are down, and it's actually time to solve a problem, I tend to just kinda freeze mentally. The way Bird Secondaries are described, it's like, when a problem happens, they pull on a tool they've created for the situation, and then BOOM, they're using it to handle it.

Birds are good at retrofitting old tools to new situations, it's true. But I don't think I talk enough about what happens when a Bird just... comes up with nothing. And I think the answer is they start looking like a Lion secondary, kind of flailing around.

(I also think that *young* Bird secondaries have a way of looking kind of like Lions, because they haven't had an opportunity to build their tools yet.)

When bad things happen, my mind goes blank. I just kinda start doing stuff, anything. Sure, I might remember something important, like some specific training, but for the most part, my brain goes blank and I go into autopilot.

I don't know *how* bad we're talking here. But if you're in full on SURVIVAL mode, this is where the fight/flight/freeze/fawn kicks in. The reason training gets drilled in like that is so it *stays* when your brain isn't working. I've always found that the really intense stuff feels very quiet, and very dreamlike in the moment, and the emotions don't kick in until later. But the point is... that's not SHC stuff.

So far, you read as someone with a fun Bird model that you love, but your problem-solving is probably coming from somewhere else. (Or possibly it's Burnt...)

For Badger Secondary, I think that's the secondary I wish I could be, but I don't think I am. I have ADHD, so being meticulous and thoughtful are just... absolutely exhausting to me.

It might look a little different, but you can 100% be a Badger secondary with ADHD.

I was raised in a family that really pushed always being a Badger Secondary, forget about yourself, help others, others' problems are more pressing than your own.

Oooh that's not a Badger secondary family. What you're describing here is an Exploded Badger primary culture. And if you're a Badger primary yourself... I bet that got confusing.

(100% your family might have ALSO have required Badger secondaries from everyone, I would think that's likely. So I'll keep that in mind.)

Part of me didn't believe it, but much of me still does. I like to help, I want to help, but I'm also Badger Primary, which can feed that want. Secondary is about what you naturally do to serve what you want, and I'm not sure if Badger Secondary is right. But, I do try to be there for people. My natural instinct when someone is in danger is to protect and comfort them, I'm very focused on the mental/emotional state of the victim more than anything else.

Gee, you write like you're a rescue worker or a firefighter. (And a Badger primary.)

When in any kind of conflict at work, I want to soothe them, to calm them down, and I try to become what I think they might want me to be to help them calm down, but it doesn't always work. Part of me also always wants to tell those people fuck it, you caused your own problem, you're on your fucking own. Lol. And it would feel good to tell them that. I wish more tough love was accepted in the world, generally. I would feel like I could breathe more.

Okay, there's a lot going on here. You "become what I think they might want me to be" which is - Deliberate. And more Snake than Bird, because of the whole one-face-per-person thing. (It not working all the time is neither here nor there, you're human, you'll make the wrong call sometimes.)

But... you like the idea of a more tough-love Lion secondary approach. "I would feel like I could breathe more." And there's something about the Badger secondary that you like... maybe it's that "No, you move" energy.

As for Snake Secondary... this one might be it. Only problem is... I kind of don't want it to be? I know there's a whole thing about not letting go stereotypes get in the way, but I want to be the person I pretend to be, I guess. I want to be a Badger Secondary, but I'm afraid I'm a Snake Secondary because, from experience, people do not like you when you behave the way you truly want to. They shun you.

"Behave the way you truly want to."

Okay, let's unpack that.

The face-changing guys (Snake and Bird) want to be behave that way. They are authentic, in that their face-changing is consensual. Same thing with a Courtier Badger, with the caveat that their face-changing isn't as much of a deliberate choice. But it's still something that they want to do.

They can all run into situation where their face-changing is forced on them (becomes non-consensual) and is therefore inauthentic. This is a separate issue from the Lion secondary "eh, I'm going to rub some people the wrong way just by existing, comes with the territory, whatever." And I don't know which one is you.

If I wanna speak more "bluntly," not like my friend, but just more plainly, feel more like ME and less like a persona, people find me too negative, too sarcastic, I speak for too long, or I'm somehow either too passionate or dispassionate and I'm never ENOUGH either way. The performance is tiring. I want to be free to be me, but the true me isn't particularly good at anything.

Oh you're Burnt. I'm so sorry.

Because what you are talking about here is neurodivergent masking. (Which is totally different from Snake masking, I'm sorry the words are the same, I know it's confusing.)

'Too negative' shows up when you don't know if a comment is appropriate to the conversation or not. 'Too sarcastic' happens when you make a joke that doesn't land. 'Speaking for too long' - hyperfixations. 'Too passionate' - probably hypersensitivity. 'Too dispassionate' - possibly a flat affect, or a tendency to shut down.

Now I do not diagnose people here. That is impossible and unethical. But I can say that it sounds like you're masking all the time and that is exhausting. Especially especially for a Badger primary who needs communities they feel safe in, basically to exist.

I promise, I promise, I promise that there are communities out there where you can take off the mask.

I try to be who people want me to be, I try to be the puzzle piece that fits best in the world's puzzle, and I fail at that. I'm never quite what they're looking for.

It sounds like you're desperately trying to model Courtier Badger secondary, and it's hurting you.

Too clumsy, too forgetful, too focused on unimportant things, and I ultimately can't keep up the facade, the cracks begin to show that I'm a fraud and this put-together, organized person is absolutely NOT who I am, and I am shunned.

So you've built yourself a Bookkeeper Badger model. In order to keep your life organized. Good. But then you're guilty and like, sort of imposter-syndrome about the fact that this isn't your entire personality, that this isn't *enough*

Then, I try to be myself. More funny, more sarcastic, slightly more blunt, just slightly, just enough to reveal the passionate and opinionated person I am underneath. I woukd never want to actually hurt anyone's feelings, but I have to air out the things I truly feel every once in a while. I have to be me.

Sorry to break it to you, but you're a lion secondary. And you're plenty likable.

But, at least in some circles, I scare people away. Like it's sudden whiplash in the differences between my two personalities. Those I meet while trying to be my put-together persona are usually really turned off by the more real, true me. They usually don't get me, think my interests are weird, or that I'm just too intense (hearing Angelica Schuyler describe herself in Hamilton the first time... I'd never felt more seen by a character in something EVER. Some men say that I'm intense or I'm insane. Lol!)

Angelica's a pretty loud Lion secondary.

Now, I know to some degree it's my own Lion primary talking, but I read this and think "that sounds like a them problem." I know that having a Badger primary is going to make thinking that way harder, and having an Exploded Badger family culture is going to make it even harder than that.

But, I don't know what to tell you. You sound fun to hang out with. And there's a reason Badger Lion is the Protagonist sorting, and the Starfleet Officer sorting. People *like* them.

Well, anyway, that was a long winded way to ask for some help. Lol! Were you able to pick up on any clues? Thanks so much if you even attempted to read this! Lol.

Lion with Bird model can be quite tough. But I agree with you, Birds are more flexible when it comes to taking in new info. They are more organic than those with Bird model.

My dad is Double Bird, he takes in information like a dry sponge and incorporates them into his system (as well as editing his previous understanding) quickly and gracefully. There is no stuttering or even a period of acclimatization. He knows more, understands the topic deeper, so he will just change and adapt to it. (Birds are actually very flexible and adaptive, morally, unless exploded, of course).

However, some birds are also very resistant to new information. Especially if it goes against their previously learned and internalized set of information. Like those religious fanatics for example, or in less extreme case, inflexible law enforcer. They find solace in laws, so they won't budge or adapt new information.

Snake Primary // Bird Model, Badger Performance

according to @sortinghatchats‘ system, as requested by an anon.

I swear once a week I go through a cycle of “Oh, I MUST model Bird!” “Hmm no, SURELY I model Lion” “Nah, this is just a normal morality thing I use, not a model, since we all have to deal with stuff outside of our people, and not all snakes have models.”

For the Mourning Doves, the cranberries just posed another chance to play the photo model game :D 

hey!! so back in april i sent in a sortme submission, and you ultimately said that u think that i’m a slightly burnt lion primary + bird secondary (snake model). i just wanted to thank u again for taking the time to help me with that! but i just have some doubts still, and some more to say, i’m so sorry if it’s too much or all over the place!

i’ve always turned to other people in my life that i trusted and loved the most to help guide me in almost every situation, because i just get so indecisive, and i feel like i need an outside source to either affirm or deny my choice. but i feel like i usually end up going either with my gut feeling and feeling satisfied, or go with what “sounds” right but end up getting hurt.

If you didn’t say the thing about gut response, I would have described all this as Exploded *Bird.* If you really do feel better/safer/more satisfied going with your gut response, then that’s still a Lion. (Although I’m keeping open the possibility that you’re a Bird who thinks they need to be a Lion for some reason.)

but either way i just feel so guilty, like i can’t help wondering if i made the wrong choice or if i can turn around and choose the other one. so i feel like the whole process is just very burnt lion-y.

It does, yeah.

also, when i said that i felt like everyone develops some sort of improvisational model as an adult, i actually meant to say foundational (i think that’s the term?) secondary models.

I think you wrote the first submission early enough that the terms were still in flux. If you meant to say that you think all adults have learned to model built/prepwork secondaries, that’s completely different, and skews me in the direction of thinking that your Bird secondary might in fact be a model.

also, on my bird secondary, i feel like i might have some lion in there? when i was young, i was quite shy, but when i would get comfortable enough i wouldn’t think as much before i acted. 

That’s a human thing, but I’ll keep an eye on it. 

and then in middle and hs, there was this internal struggle of not being comfortable enough around certain people to be outgoing and social, to show that side of me to others, and i would be jealous seeing other people just be themselves so easily. 

This specific thing most likely relates back to your Burnt primary. Burnt Lion are often jealous of un-Burnt Lions, that’s a thing.