Top Posts Tagged with #avid.x

have an urge to create an online presence

post something in a discord server

instant regret! overwhelming shame!

its been hours at this point and i still feel awful!

#rip me ig #tumblr is.. easier thankfully #avpd #actuallyavpd #avoidant #actuallyavoidant #avoidant personality disorder #avid.x

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it takes so much effort be the bare minimum of a person, to be distinct entity that that can be interacted with, and it’s rarely something i can make myself do. frustrating as hell

#lowkey really envious of everyone who can seemingly just exist #like it isn't an enormous amount of effort just to feel like an actual whole person #i don't really feel lonely #(mostly)#i just feel completely and involuntarily invisible #and i hate it #avpd #szpd #npd #? for those last two #avid.x

hate wanting to have an online presence but feeling that i’m somehow ontologically terrible and inadequate

#avpd #actuallyavpd #actually avpd #does this even make sense?#idk idc #avid.x #finally doing well enough to post this after a week thinking it

I don’t feel like a person, I don’t have any sense of identity that I share with the outside world (do I have any identity at all? is anything about me even real?). I don’t leave any trace of myself behind; I want to be known, and yet i guess I don't have enough energy or desire to change any of the things that result in me living like this. So i continue to exist in this unsatisfying, half-formed state.

#npd #avpd #szpd(?)#maybe?#avid.x #cluster c #cluster a #cluster b #actuallyavpd #actuallyavoidant #avoidant personality disorder #szpd #oof this post is a mess

wish I had the confidence to say for sure that I’m not faking or exaggerating my mental illnesses

#npd #I really need to directly address this w/ my therapist #avid.x