Faramond: Oh, my boyfriend’s a demon and I’m mad at him.

Angel: Oh no..!

Art: GRRR! YOU CAN’T STAY INSIDE THAT SALT BARRIER FOREVER!

Shane: you're either a skeptic or a firm believer in stupid jokes

Ryan: you believe in the supernatural or you just think Ryan's hot

Demon Shane: you're either a monsterfucker, afraid of tall people or just came here to have a good time

Ricky Goldsworth: you think feral Ryan's hot or you're a bitch for whump

C.C. Tinsley: you're a bitch for period dramas or you haven't slept in three days

Francesca Norris: you're a lesbian

Night-Night Bergara: You like Ricky but you're in denial about it or you just really like mafia stories

Legs Madej: you like mafia stories but you're also into tall people or you want to see Shane go feral

Banjo McClintock: you want to do an art heist so bad and everyone can see it

Demon!Tinsley or Demon!Ricky: You're a fandom innovator and a god among men

Sara: I don't know who you are but you're so valid and I support you

Angel!Ryan: How's the Good Omens watch going for ya?

Angel!Shane: you're all comfort no hurt

Bonus shipping round!!!:

Demon!Shane x Anyone: you love your angst don't you

Tinsworth: nothing is more romantic to you than patching someone up after a fight or you love enemies/friends/lovers

Night-Night x Legs Madej: Murder Husbands Enthusiast

Banjo x Francesca Norris: nothing is more romantic to you than a spy mission

Shane x Sara: domestic fluff is the best genre and you will die on this hill

no i hadn’t heard this! but that idea is fucking hysterical!

this also implies that an angel is spending his free time trying to prove to a disbeliever that ghosts are real and also telling true crime stories when he probably 100% knows what actually happened, and the fact that supernatural things are probably involved in some of the unsolved cases.

Shane in the background:

stay the night with the sinners - bodhirookes | E, 85k, Complete

“Enjoy recess?”

Ryan doesn’t recoil, even as his stomach does. “Yes.”

Shane Madej doesn’t back down at the cold, one-worded answer. On the contrary, it makes his grin widen until Ryan can see every single one of his big, pointed teeth.

“I’m sure the City of Angels really does it for you, Bergmeister. Lots of innocent, impressionable souls. It’s like an all-you-can-eat buffet out there.”

“Sounds like it’s more your speed. And don’t call me that—I’ll light you up with Holy Fire before you even have the time to take it back.”

“Aw, don’t be like that,” Shane cooes, stooping closer. Ryan hates him, hates the icy-hot cavity that forms in his gut at the sight of his unruly hair and his black, black eyes. “L.A.’s big enough for the both of us, sweetheart. We can share.”

Or, Steven Lim, an angel, and Andrew Ilnyckyj, a demon, flee Heaven and Hell to be together, and Ryan Bergara, an angel, is forced to serve on the jury for their trial. He hates every single second of it, and Shane Madej, one of the oldest Greater demons around, is constantly there to remind him why Heaven and Hell should never be allowed to fraternize.

knowing me, knowing you - askmeaboutmyoctopustheory | T, 1.8k, Complete

the serpent of eden

the dove of peace

a friendship that outlasts the ages

a relationship to stand the ultimate test

-----

i'm bad at summaries but this is Unsolved Omens

my love, where art thou? (return, my loveliest dove) - smushedapathy | T, 2.5k, Complete

For where thou art, there is the world itself, With every several pleasure in the world, And where thou art not, desolation.