🖤🤍💜 Happy Ace Awareness Week! 🖤🤍💜

-being told you’ll one day figure it out 

- being told you’re broken 

 - constantly asked if you love your parents/friends 

 - forcing you into romantic/sexual environments when you show uncomfortableness

 - “you’re too young to know”

 - “you’ll like it when you try”

- “are you sure you’re not just ill/sick?” 

- “i’m celibate too!!” (this could be very harmful since it is participating in the erasure of ace identities) 

 - “how can you not fall in love?”

 - “i can change you” 

- “aro/ace identities are caused by trauma”

-saying someone isn’t ace for being cupio/positive 4 sex/romance 

 -“You just haven’t met the right person” 

-“ace/aro are not queer” -“ace/aro arent discriminated against “ 

-“ace/aro isn’t LGBTQ+” 

-“are you sureeeee you’re asexual?/aromantic?” 

- “i think you’re confused”

Happy Ace Pride Week! :D I’m super pumped! I may not post often, but when I do, I hope you like.

So my pronouns are she/her and I had four boyfriends before I found out I was ace. The first one was my best friend, and we started dating in middle school, because that’s what boys and girls do when they “like each other”. We never moved past holding hands, and at the end of the year, i broke up with him because it didn’t feel right. My freshman year of high school, I had another boyfriend, who I wasn’t really sure if I liked, but I was flattered that he showed interest in me, so we started dating. After a couple months, I realized I felt uncomfortable with the idea of him kissing me, so I broke up with him. My third boyfriend was also a friend of mine, and I thought he was funny and sweet, so we started dating. We never went on a date, but after homecoming, he said he wanted to give me a gift, and tried to kiss me. I say tried because I was in the midst of eating a cookie and I was like OMG WAIT. After that we kissed (but just like a peck not full on making out), and went to the after party at my house, where I had to pull my best friend (a girl this time) aside because I was panicking. Panicking because I was so uncomfortable with kissing him and knew he’d wanna kiss again. Now we’d been dating for like 6 months, so I didn’t understand why I didn’t want to kiss him, or quite frankly, anything? Why didn’t I feel anything? I broke up with him a week later.

My fourth boyfriend I asked to try being friends with me before we started dating, because I thought maybe I just wasn’t comfortable enough with those boyfriends because we were only distant friends and never actually went on dates. He was my longest lasting boyfriend, and the one I liked the most. We dated for over a year, actually went on dates, I made him a Build-a-Bear, it was so cute. And I enjoyed it! I liked holding his hand, I liked it when he put his arm around me, I liked it when he’d kiss my cheek. But I still never had the urge to make out with him (or anything further). I was so lost. I was confused. I was positive something was wrong with me. Here was this perfect guy, and I felt NOTHING. I then started to research, and realized I really don’t feel any different between boys and girls. I don’t feel anything. And it was strange because I wanted to be in a relationship. I wanted to feel. But I couldn’t. There was nothing. I kept this to myself for a while before telling my best friend. As a very sex positive hetero, she didn’t quite get it and kept telling me I’d find the right guy in college. Over the summer I went to a mock government camp where I met one of my new friends, who was bisexual. After discussing it with her, she urged me to tell my boyfriend, but I just wasn’t ready. I hardly understood it myself, and I didn’t want him to break up with me. It didn’t really matter though, a month later, before my last band camp, he broke up with me over text because he asked my best friend if I still liked him, and she told him no. He tried to play it off as me “not putting enough effort into our relationship” but really, if he just took the time to talk to me instead of being a coward. It all could have been avoided. Honestly I’m still kind of disappointed, but he turned into a douche afterwards so it was probably for the best.