I'm aware this is somewhat ironic given the 'dont hold it to higher standards' line but I do want to chime in that 3m2, apart from being delightful kitten brainrot, also really inspired me to think more about writing trans characters in fics alongside having some neat angles to the situation (specifically Adora not outing herself) that I hadnt seen before or since, really. It's incredibly disheartening that people gave you shit for that, and I just wanted to chime in with something positive <3
no thank you i appreciate it π it's mostly like, four people who ruined it for me tbh but i made me feel really bad and i never knew when another one was going to show up since they were staggered over the months (the person with the biggest issue around catra's decision didnt even show up for like a year). im putting the rest of this under the cut because it became a long vent about why i feel that way about the fic now, sorry lol, i really appreciate it and if you want to only have positive associations with the fic (someone deserves to), feel free to stop reading now if you think my experience could color yours.
i didn't just write that fic for kitten brainrot, or because i wanted to write a trans parent getting to thrive (which was my intention, despite the rando who claimed i was only making adora trans for a plot device and should have instead made it a magic pregnancy because that would have been better somehow?? no, i wanted to show adora, as a trans woman, building a family and happy when she thought that wasn't something she would get a chance at). i also wrote it because unplanned pregnancy was a big part of my life as someone who was close to the education system (due to my mom working in it for most of my life, and then doing the same later myself). it was something important to me that i had watched have these consequences (often worse) many times before to high schoolers. i remember my mom having a student vanish one day and then crying with both relief and sadness a year later when the student came back and she found out it was because she had a baby and her parents pulled her out of school for her to go through that. i also remember her lowkey wanting to kill a guy she already didn't like when she found out he was the one who knocked up one of her students who was really sweet and going through really hard times, in part due to her baby that totally derailed her life. its an important topic to me. i knew people would have problems with that, and i knew there would be transphobes too. that didn't make them not suck, especially the people who attacked catra's choice in the comments, but the thing that got to me was the 2 or 3 (idr) times other trans people attacked the fic.
those comments kind of felt like people who hated themselves so much they needed to spit vitriol at anyone who wrote a trans character having like... problems. obviously any trans character having issues means trans women can never have happiness and i'm part of the problemπ those people also would outright ignore where i said, multiple times, in the author's notes and all my bios, that i am trans because again, i was doing (writing and being) trans "wrong".
i had one woman go through all my fics after reading 3m2 and leave negative comments on every single fic i tagged "trans female character" to seemingly try to shame me out of ever writing trans women again, and i know that's what she did because she missed the one i just happened to have only tagged "trans character" that was also a trans!adora fic (when i realized that was the reason i think i started only using the trans character tag from then on). said woman also had force transfem!harry x snape all over her bookmarks btw. like i don't respect your opinion on anything actually! but it still felt really bad. i mean it's straight up harassment, and i also felt bad because i knew she must have done that to cis authors too who were trying their best and 1) felt like they actually had no idea what they were doing after reading that criticism and got disheartened and 2) probably felt like the community would rather attack them for a single misstep than have them as an ally so they might as well not try. like i felt that way after reading those comments and i had literally medically transitioned!!
(sidenote, when that women wrote negative comments on everything she also criticized me for "of course making adora the top" in LGP and it has bothered my pedantic side ever since because Adora does not even top in that fic, and whether she's trans or not she's still going to be a sub service top. sorry but that's her Character and to imply her anatomy should change that is insane, same thing with catra being a dom power bottom in CoA despite having different anatomy because that's who she is to me)
anyway it wasn't just her but im going on about it because that was the worst one i've ever had and i only felt genuinely harassed stemming from one fic. i tried to make myself feel better about 3m2 not long ago by reading the bookmark notes people left assuming that would be people who liked the fic, but then that's where i saw the person dismissing me as just making adora trans as a plot device (and to be clear it is that too! it can be multiple things and still be meaningful, the plot wouldn't work without her being trans because it was built around that so it would be the very center of the fic!) and at that point i decided to sever all relationship i had with the fic.
it sucks because i did really love it while i was writing it (this situation is why i was so damn scared to post Somewhere Beautiful, We Can Finally Dream, but thankfully people were mostly normal about that one even though i really thought they wouldnt be to the point where i can't remember if anyone was actually weird at all or i just imagined all the ways they would be weird), so it is really good to hear that some people took away the things from the fic that i was TRYING to communicate (that moment with adora trying not to out herself was really important to me because i thought it was something cis people wouldn't think about and it would help them navigate the topic in a more informed way!!). i dont think at this point i can recover my relationship with the fic, but i'll try to remember this ask (and other comments people sent in response to that post) rather than the othersπthis response got way too long but lowkey i needed to get it off my chest and i hope i never think about that fic again now. if you enjoy the fic PLEASE keep enjoying it, i want people to!! lowkey none of that stuff was worth it if people don't enjoy it now since i dont anymore, so please don't let anything i said here color your experience like it colored mine. thank you so much for enjoying it. clearly, it's something i needed to hear, and it means a lot to me.
anyway i need to stop trying to edit this response to be "acceptable" in a way that lets me get this off my chest without attracting more attention or making other people feel bad about it too, so im just posting this now and i might delete this later, idk. i briefly thought that about the fic too but i didnt (and wouldn't unless something really bad happened again) so im just hitting post now ugh. thank you i do mean it!! god i have no idea how this reads, you can tell me feelings are complicated lmao. i really should delete this tomorrow. whateverrrrr (thank you)
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Thatβs the whole novel, right there. Β Thatβs Dumas telling us that this is a comedy of violence. Β We will see blood, there will be wounds, there will be deaths. Β And simultaneously, there will be laughter.
Humour has always been part of how soldiers (and doctors, and others on the frontline of death) cope. Β But these soldiers arenβt in the field: theyβre at home in peacetime, picking fights with the Cardinalβs Guards and, if they canβt do that, with each other. Β (βWhen one cannot live by fighting the enemy, one lives by fighting oneβs compatriots.β) Β When we finally do go to war, weβll be fighting other French people.
Meanwhile: DβArtagnan is shocked, but finds himself βinclined (despite his esteem for the advice of his father) to praise, rather than condemn, the unheard-of things which went on around him.β
He has seen his new world, and itβs terrible, and he likes it. Β En avant!
Mara is the kitten most like catra but which one is most like adora?
Oh Cyra 100%. She has a lot of similarities to both Adora and Glimmer - mostly because she's like Adora but without the Crushing Weight of how she was raised.
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Everyone's nice. But I'm not so used to this goodness. haha! Ang babait kasi nilang lahat. Well, we belong! :))
Our first few pictures. A lot more to come! ^_^
