#(of some sort)

You swear the email was gilded in gold. You hadn’t even thought about it. You said yes as soon as you got the offer, dropping everything else. Everybody knows who Leon is, and you weren’t going to let anyone else take this from you. The day you met him, you heard a choir singing his praises in the distance. Now, you’ve been with him for about three years. You live with him, taking care of his needs as they come up. Well, most of his needs.

When people ask you what your job is, you like to compare yourself to Pepper Potts. You manage Leon's schedule, book shoots, manage travel, coordinate collaborations, but you also run his errands, ensure he's healthy, and... take care of the women he brings home. You couldn't put a number to it. Most of them are one-night stands or friends with benefits. Never a relationship. In the morning, you guide the women to a car with a driver who'll take them anywhere they want to go.

It's not like he's a whore, to be clear. He's a beautiful man, and you respect him for being with beautiful women. It's not your place to judge a man who has an entirely different life from you. Today, a woman from the last fashion show saunters out of his bedroom and downstairs. "You must be the famous Ms. Assistant," the woman says, venom dripping from her voice. "After all these years, Leon still has you?"

"I do anything and everything Mr. Kennedy asks," you reply cordially. "Is that all?"

She scoffs, making her way out the door to the car. You sigh, making your way to Leon's office downstairs, where he usually hides after a one-night stand. He looks up. "Hi," he says with a smile. "How are you, beautiful?" You raise your brow at the nickname, but say nothing about it.

"Mr. Kennedy," you greet softly. "She's gone."

"Thank you," he says, looking back at his computer monitor.

You bow your head, then turn to leave.

"Don't go yet, I have something I need you to look at," he says, grabbing you by the sleeve. "Calvin Klein wants me to do an ad for them."

You peek at the screen. "Okay, I'll set it up."

"I want you to be there," he says. "For the shoot."

"...Right. I assumed as much," you say carefully. "Are you okay, Mr. Kennedy?"

"Yeah, 'course. I'm the King of Okay," he replies.

You blink. "You're being very weird."

"I'm not being weird," he huffs, wrinkling his nose at you.

"You called me beautiful," you note.

"Am I not allowed to call you beautiful?" He crosses his arms over his broad chest.

"W-well, no," you stutter. "You just don't do it very often."

"I'm not being weird," he repeats.

There's a long, awkward pause between the two of you. "Alrighty then," you say finally. "I'll book that Calvin Klein shoot."

"Thank you, sweetheart," he says.

[user wanhook]: ">Go back and ask why he’s here early. Your date is tomorrow not today!"

>> Thank you for your entry! -🔑

Before he answers, Doffy hands his coat to you, ambling(?) shuffling(?) (indescribable motion) you further into your apartment, contorting his body to fit under the doorways like the 10 foot monstrosity he is. Then...

...He plops down comfortably (understatement) at your dining room table.

So theoretically if this works..

Waterboy being sexually repressed and becoming sexually frustrated because of it

The team doesn't exactly realize what's happening, and is mostly focused on the fact that Herman is kind of more emotional than he usually is (which is a lot, considering he's technically an emotional person, not in a bad way, but still)

Until they do eventually find out (which is mortifying in Herman's opinion) and with the Z-team's chaoticness, they decide to do something about it (P/N: okay, what the fuck guys??)

You guys see my vision with this right...?? Please I can't be the only one waiting for random fics to pop up in my ao3