#dispatch z team

z-team are genuinely curious on how waterboy's and royd's relationship works out. since you know, they have a visible size difference, so during one of their outings, they nudge herm for a little bit, asking if him and royd have done anything yet.

herm gets red in the face and he's like, "n–no! we've o–only... k–kissed. f–for a l–little bit."

and someone points out that they've been dating for a few months now and... they haven't even had sex yet?

and until then, herman didn't even notice it. he doesn't need sex from his partner, it's just a fun experience to have with them if both want it, but... what if royd just doesn't like him like that? usually partners have sex earlier, why are they not doing it? is there something wrong with him? is royd going to leave him because he doesn't find him attractive enough to have sex with him?

and he, to stop his spiraling, decided to go and drink his worries away.

he gets drunk pretty quickly. some of his teammates even egg him on, before robert tells them to stop and leave him alone.

herm gets so wasted, he starts drunk calling royd, asking him if he doesn't like him and why are they not having sex.

but because of how drunk he is, the only thing half-asleep royd can hear is sobbing and hiccuping. he just... tells herm he'll pick him up in a few minutes.

z-team and robert find out only when herm says he needs to check up on his kid during his break (sdn provide childcare for their worker's kids during work or something). somehow, robert missed that waterboy literally has a child in his paperwork.

and you know, the whole talking thing starts between them, because it's very clear they have feelings for each other. they went on a few dates already, and herm wants his kid to meet robert, since it's important for him that his child likes his new partner.

and they don't. the kid HATES robert. they don't want their papa to be dating anyone else, because they still think that he might get together with their other biological dad again, since they don't know the reasons behind their separation.

so they're very protective of their papa. the kid always clings to herm whenever they're close to robert and they always give him a very mean stare. they really don't like robert.

so when robert and herm's kid are left alone while herm went somewhere for a second, they end up having the conversation from moral orel.

herm's kid: robert... you like my papa the way my dad likes my papa, don't you?

robert: ...your dad likes your papa?

honestly? yes, i can see him calling herm otterboy, but rarely. just to tease him. while z-team on the other hand, just call him otterboy like it's his actual hero name. they went so far to fuck around with robert's computer and change waterboy's name to otterboy in the system.

and also, yes!!!! he is SO amused. he loves when herm doesn't hide his ears or tail around the house, because it's just so adorable. especially his tail, since there's not much information on why otters wag their tails, but they do. they usually wag it to help while swimming or to dry it off, but sometimes they also wag it when they're excited or playful. so he likes seeing herm wag his tail. he thinks it's so cute.

yeah, probably.

i think they laughed their asses off when they learned that herm is taking robert's last name.

after they got married, sonar asked if herm is their boss #2 now since he's robert's husband. robert said that... no, that's not how it works, but it just stuck now.

the thought of flambae and waterboy being angels is soooo cute

flambae is a little angel who disguise himself as a demon. or he's... just a demon. herm is a little angel, telling robert he needs to lay down with a worried expression.