Hello and Welcome

It's even funnier when you find out that they had to stop using this ad because they were using music they didn't have the rights to

apparently the font was pirated too. inadvertently, like it was an illegal knockoff of a licensed font and they didn't realize it, but still rules. house of cards

this ad was how i found out piracy was a thing you could do. lifechanging, really

“Hear me out” and it’s the most conventionally attractive alien father figure you’ve ever seen

*Still uses pinky promises as a legitimate foundation of trust*

question. why do you have 7 featureless grey monoliths in your driveway

There's eight actually but the last one is still in the garage

question. why do you have eight featureless grey monoliths

They're actually a really dark purple

question. why do you have seven featureless really dark purple monoliths in your driveway and an eighth in the garage

Some of them do have features though. There's holes and hinges and stuff, so I can put secrets in em

question. why do you have 8 really dark purple occasionally featureful monoliths

The heart wants what the heart wants

half the men yall call daddy can't even put air in a tire. yeah he can pull your hair but can he chop an onion? no he cannot.

I taught my friend how to chop an onion bc no one taught him how to cook (guy in a conservative Christian family). He was so excited to be cooking for the first time so I made him chop the onion bc I hate doing it. And suddenly he starts yelling “MY EYES ARE WATERING!!!! ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING!!!”. He was so fucking excited but I had to stop him bc he couldn’t see but was still chopping.

You could say their Attractions are...all or nothing

Owl or Nothing

We've gotten to a point where people who've never seen the show are reblogging this