let's reintroduce "rude" to the lexicon no that person is not evil or morally bankrupt or even your enemy they're just being rude

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

man sometimes friendship really is just "I saw this and knew it would give you psychic damage. please respond with agony" and then they do. and it's great

i'd truly be fucked in her situation because rumpelstiltskin is not a name that would come to mind for me

sources say there are muscles in the back of my neck. and they want to kill me

They call it the never afford anything and kill yourself economy

This two feel basically like Dick Grayson in the batsuit vs Bruce in the batsuit.

i fucking hated your shoelaces this entire time

When the pairing is so good that it doesn’t matter if you see it as romantic or platonic. What matters is that you see them and know that one is not complete without the other. Frequently bought together. Do not separate. If you separate them one of them will bite you

the procrastinator’s mind will invent distractions you’ve never conceived of in order to avoid tasks even a dog could do.

is there a name for the thing where people find out that a cute animal is still an animal that kills and fucks and does things that would be bad for humans to do to eachother so they start going "did you know DUCKS are EVIL?? did you know DOLPHINS will NEVER SEE THE LIGHT OF GOD?? did you know your CAT is MORALLY BANKRUPT??"