Lita.

note to self: if someone can fall asleep knowing you’re crying, knowing you’re hurting or didn’t get home safe, they don’t care for you.

just because it still makes you cry doesn’t mean you aren’t moving on

Thanks

me explaining underwear to aliens: we have smaller, secret pants that we wear under our normal pants

This is so confusing to read as a British person

me explaining underwear to the British: oi lad we have smaller, secret chaps that wear below our normal chaps while we dump all your tea into the harbor

everyone’s having their mid-life crises at like 19

A heartfelt and breathless "Fuck" is the sexiest sound

me, heartfelt and breathless, as i lay in bed eating chips and dip and drop some dip down my shirt: fuck

She said call me I’m screaming

Concept: you’ve been married to your wife for 3 years. You wake up in your bed before she does, your nose cold but your body warm. Careful not to wake her, you get out of bed and your toes curl when your feet hit the cold floor. You brew a pot of coffee and take a cup, making sure to leave enough for her. You pull on a big sweater and walk out onto your deck, sitting in a big wood chair to look out over the forest. The leaves are orange and edged with frost. All is quiet as the sun rises over the trees. You hear the door opening behind you and your wife sits down next to you, wrapping the comforter from your bed around both of you shoulders. You sit there like that until the sun is well up and your coffee cups are empty.

Oh my god. This is it. I want this so badly.

UNMUTE THIS

😩😩😂😂😂😂

why are people even questioning obesity in america

why is your tea liquidised?

….. Where exactly do you live that the tea isn’t liquid?!?

No it’s sweet tea you drink it cold

WHO DRINKS COLD TEA???

HAVE YOU NEVER HAD ICED/SWEET TEA BEFORE?!?

England, you stole tea from China.  You’ve had it a mere 4 centuries compared to their 30+.  Don’t play like you’re some kind of authority.

[skeletons ooh-ing]

Shots fired. World War Tea has officially begun.

#INTO THE HARBOR

Englad doesn’t own anything

except that time we owned most of the world