I think people on here who love Bushisms would love Stoiberisms if there was a way to translate those without giving myself an aneurysm
I consider myself a fairly competent translator and linguist but whenever I read a Stoiberism the part of my brain that processes language just completely shuts down
Best quotes of German politician Edmund Stoiber, translated into English as best as I can without risking my sanity:
“I don’t just make empty promises, I also keep them.”
“When a family has a child - a wife with her husband or vice versa.”Â
“When I sit in the garden for half an hour, or an hour or two, on a Sunday, when the weather is good, it refuels me, and I made a habit out of walking into the garden each morning and maybe maim the lawn, uh, mow the lawn or I tell my wife what I’d like to do in the garden. And then she does it with the gardener.”Â
“When you have a trio at the front like Ronaldo, Ronaldinho and, uhm, the other Brazilian, Roberto Carlos. That’s, ah, Rivaldo, too, Rivaldo and, uh, Ronaldinho and Rod, uh, Ronaldo, then, uh, losing that. That’s bitter but not that bitter.”
“It has to be possible, ladies and gentlemen, when I look at the CDU, the representatives of party leadership, in the federal states, the municipalities, then it only needs one thing, a spark, so to speak, in the lazing blembers, the embing blazers, that we can do it and that’s why, the blazing emblers, if I may say so, and that’s why, ladies and gentlemen.”Â
And the most famous and puzzling of all:
“When you, starting at Munich Central Station, with ten minutes, without having to check in at the airport, then you start, so to speak, you start your flight at Munich Central Station. Ten minutes. Look at the big airports. When you in Heathrow in London or somewhere, uhm, Charles de Gaulle in France or in, in Rome. When you look at the distances. When you look at Frankfurt, you will realize, that ten minutes is surely what you need to find your gate. When you start from your flight from the train station. You embark on the station, you take the train in ten minutes into the airport, at the airport Franz Josef Strauß. Then you start practically at Munich Central Station. This means, of course, that the train station, technically, grows closer to Bavaria, to the Bavarian cities, because that’s obvious, because at the Central Station many lines of Bavaria converge.”
aaaaaand i just remembered this gem:
