How to find a job without losing your sanity
By your local socially awkward literal minded autistic who has nonetheless applied for and gotten many jobs over the years.
Part 1: Resumes
Basic format: contact info at the top, then your work experience in reverse-chronological order. After that, you can put sections for education, volunteering/community involvement, and/or miscellaneous skills and certifications.
If your work history is spotty, you can include community involvement and volunteer stuff in the work experience section, just make it clear that this was volunteer work.
Skills and certifications are things like MS Office suite, food handler's license, Quickbooks, CPR, other languages, or commercial driver's licenses. Only include ones that are relevant to the jobs you're applying for. Include languages if you're fluent enough to do your job in the language.
For the infamous bullet points for each job, use the following template: Did [thing] using [tool/process] resulting in [good thing]. Adjust as necessary.
Examples: Mopped up spills -> Rapidly cleared away spilled product with liquid absorbent, ensuring customer and coworker safety. Washed dishes at the restaurant -> Cleaned and sanitized a large volume of dishes using a three-compartment sink system, ensuring line cooks always had a ready supply of dishes and cutlery.
You can make a few different versions of your resume if you're applying to different types of jobs.
Part 2: applications
It's worth singing up for the basic job boards--Indeed and ZipRecruiter are my go-tos. Look for job boards aimed at fields you're interested in. Idealist has non-profit jobs, and CoolWorks is aimed at hospitality and outdoor-type jobs in remote areas (that often come with housing).
When submitting a job application, follow the application instructions. Ignore your boomer relatives who say to stand out by calling the company every day or sending flowers or whatever. Stand out by following the instructions! Nobody wants to work with someone who can't or won't follow instructions.
Ask A Manager has a lot of good example cover letters. In general, don't be overly formal when you write cover letters. There's no witchcraft. Just explain why you'd be a good fit for the job, and reference things that aren't in your resume so it doesn't feel like reading a resume in paragraph form.
There's a lot of gimmicky advice out there about how to beat AI applicant tracking systems by putting buzzwords in your resume or copypasting the job description somewhere that it is only visible to the computer, or explaining gaps by saying you signed an NDA. Don't worry about any of this.
Part 3: Networking
Calm down! Networking is not nearly as sleazy as you've been lead to believe. There is no need whatsoever to send cold emails to people you don't know or tell everyone how awesome you are in 30 seconds or less. In fact, networking is so simple you've probably already done it without realizing.
Don't keep your job search a secret from people. You might need to keep it a secret from your current job, but you can tell friends, family, former coworkers, and classmates. You might even mention it on social media.
If you know someone who's job searching, keep an eye out for opportunities to connect them with. Networking goes both ways.
Asking if someone would be a reference for you is a type of networking. So is offering to be someone's reference.
Say "yes" to things that might broaden your network. Take the class someone recommended, do that informational interview, go to the meetup for local LGBT professionals.
Save phone numbers and emails. Be willing to give yours out. Be willing to pass on others' contact info with their permission.
Essentially networking is mutual aid for job searching.
Part 4: Interviews
Once again, deep breath. It's not as bad as you think.
Every hiring manager interviews with the goal of hiring someone who can succeed in the role. Interpret questions through this lens, and format your answers to communicate that you would do well in the role.
Examples: "Tell me about yourself." = "Tell me about your background as it relates to the job so I know you have the right skills to set you up for success." "How do you handle conflict in the workplace?" = "Are you going to create a bunch of drama and nightmares for HR?" "Are you good with deadlines?" = "This work features deadlines and I need someone who can meet them consistently without a ton of micromanaging, is that you?"
Of course, good hygiene, professional appearance (exact dress code varies by industry). In general, try to look well-dressed but kind of boring. Cover big tattoos to be on the safe side. You want them to focus on your qualifications, not your experience.
Have a neutral or blurred background for zoom interviews. Log in a little early to make sure your sound and video work.
The only truly illegal interview question in the US is "do you have a disability?" Questions like "where do you go to church?" or "where is your family from?" aren't illegal per se, but it is illegal to factor the answers into your hiring decision, so a good interviewer won't ask.
If an interviewer does ask an inappropriate question (usually due to ignorance rather than outright bigotry, though the latter does exist), it is okay to redirect the conversation. "I'd prefer to just discuss the job right now, since we have limited time."
It's okay to leave an interview early! You are not trapped. If an interviewer is pressing the inappropriate questions, or being a dick, or maybe the job just doesn't sound like what you thought it would be, stand up, thank them for their time, and leave.
Send a thank-you note after the job interview. Quick email: Dear [person's name]. Thank you for the opportunity to interview for [position] today. I really enjoyed our discussion of [thing you talked about]. Regards, [your name]. Adjust as necessary.
When asked why you're leaving your current job, some good answers include "I've been there a while and am looking for something new." "I'm looking for a role where I can do more [thing the job you're interviewing for has]." Keep it bland and forward-focused, and do not complain about old/current jobs for the same reason you don't trash talk your ex on the first date. The hiring manager has no way of knowing if you were the problem at your old job or not.
Ask questions right back. You have a goal too: find a job you're going to like. Good questions include "What kind of person does well in this position?" "What are the challenges that people hired for this position typically face?" "What opportunities are there to advance in this role/at this company?" "Does your company provide opportunities for continuing education/professional development?" "Can you describe a day in the life of the person in this role?" Mix, match, add, and adjust as necessary.
I've found it useless to ask about company culture because everyone just says "We're laid-back and informal." Those exact words, every time.
Part 4.5: negotiating salary.
So ideally, there would just be a pay scale for each role that factored in education and experience and spat out a fair starting salary. Some jobs do that but many don't.
Some jobs will ask you how much you want to be paid. This is where you need the confidence of a mediocre white man.
First, learn the salary range for the position. This is a good question to ask in the interview or phone screen, if it's not in the job ad.
Do a little research on what other companies are offering for the same type of work in your area. Get an idea of the typical pay for the position.
The bottom of the pay scale is for someone who meets the bare minimum qualifications and brings nothing extra to the table. If you have skills and experience, you deserve the middle of the pay scale at least.
When they ask for your salary expectations, say your number, maybe briefly mention the value that you bring. Then STOP TALKING.
When I was asked my pay expectations, I said, "Considering the experience I would bring to the role, I think [middle-upper pay scale number] would be appropriate." I got what I asked for!
Part 5: miscellany
unless the wolf is really at the door, you don't have to take the first job that makes you an offer. not everyone can afford to be choosy but if you can, take advantage of that.
if you will need disability accommodations, mention it after you have an offer. they won't be able to yank the offer without making it very obvious that they are discriminating.
most paid resume services are a scam. same with people online trying to sell you job-coaching et cetera.
everybody is using AI for applications and cover letters. hiring managers are inundated with generic-sounding application materials. if you need help with an application ask a friend or family member who was annoyingly good at english class.
volunteering when you're unemployed can help 1) cover your resume gap and 2) help you with the networking thing. plus it will help you stay sane while doing good in the world.
gaps in your resume are nothing to panic about. some hiring managers are weird about it but we've lived through how many recessions and mass layoffs at this point? It's hardly unusual.
some jobs don't require a resume, and there's actually an indeed filter for this. if you are looking for your first job, or first job in a while, this is an option.
you can leave jobs off your resume if you were only there for a short time before quitting/being fired. just, no need to mention it.
everyone with a job should have a good working knowledge of labor laws and occupational safety laws in their location.
The economy is TOUGH right now. The odds are not in your favor. But, people can get lucky and be hired in shitty economies. Go where luck can find you.
