stuffthatdoesntfitanywhereelse

stereotypical girly advertising = proof corporations don't understand real humans (women)

Antoine Leiris posted a Facebook message to ISIS, after his wife was killed in the Paris attack, “You will not have my hatred.”

On Friday night you stole the life of an exceptional being, the love of my life, the mother of my son, but you will not have my hatred.

I don’t know who you are and I don’t want to know - you are dead souls. If this God for which you kill indiscriminately made us in his own image, every bullet in the body of my wife will have been a wound in his heart.

So no, I don’t give you the gift of hating you. You are asking for it but responding to hatred with anger would be giving in to the same ignorance that made you what you are.

You want me to be afraid, to view my fellow countrymen with mistrust, to sacrifice my freedom for security.You have lost.

I saw her this morning. Finally, after many nights and days of waiting. She was just as beautiful as when she left on Friday night, just as beautiful as when I fell hopelessly in love over 12 years ago.

Of course I’m devastated with grief, I admit this small victory, but it will be short-lived. I know she will accompany us every day and that we will find ourselves in this paradise of free souls to which you’ll never have access.

We are two, my son and I, but we are stronger than all the armies of the world.

I don’t have any more time to devote to you, I have to join Melvil who is waking up from his nap. He is barely 17-months-old. He will eat his meals as usual, and then we are going to play as usual, and for his whole life this little boy will threaten you by being happy and free. Because no, you will not have his hatred either.

ah yes, time for my favorite (least favorite) discussion. how is monosexuality inherently cissexist? but (molly weasley voice) don’t worry harry dear, it isn’t your fault

let’s start out by defining monosexuality. monosexuality literally means the sexual attraction to only one gender, but the sexual attraction distinction is usually lost, and it most often gets used to refer to the combination of sexual and romantic attraction to one gender. monosexuality isn’t a sexual orientation, it’s an umbrella term that groups together straight, gay, and lesbian people. no, it is not an “inherently homophobic” term.

on the other hand, polysexual is the umbrella term that covers bisexuals, pansexuals, and other people who are attracted to more than one gender.

the thing is, monosexuality is a social construct. it is not real. so, it really isn’t monosexuality that’s cissexist, but the insistence in its existence/identifying as monosexual (or, i should say, as a monosexual sexual orientation) that’s cissexist.

again, no, what i’m saying isn’t homophobic. i’m going to request that people listen to me before any possible attacks start happening.

in order for monosexuality to be real, it requires the belief in a few cissexist ideals.

1. you can tell someone’s gender before they tell you what it is.in order for someone to say “i am only attracted to boys”, they must believe that they can tell whether or not an attractive stranger is a boy before that stranger tells them whether or not they’re a boy. and the thing is, gendering strangers is cissexist. you don’t know anyone’s gender until they tell you, and yes, this applies for even the most binary appearing of people. appearance is not indicative of gender. if you believe appearance is indicative of gender, you are cissexist. and there is no way to coincide the beliefs “appearance is not indicative of gender” and “i am only attracted to people of a specific gender”

2. there is a specific way to be a boy or girlthis one is kinda like #1. in order to believe you’re only attracted to one gender, you must also believe that there’s a specific Girl Trait or Boy Trait that makes it so you only like one gender and not any others. let’s say someone asks you why you like girls and not boys. you might say that girls have soft skin or pretty eyes or whatever. but there’s boys with those traits too. and vice versa. there is no trait that only girls have that separates them from being boys other than the fact that they identify as being girls. and that’s a very weird trait that i don’t really think affects attraction. if you say you’re not attracted to boys because they’re smelly or loud or aggressive, well there’s plenty of boys who don’t fit into that, and plenty of girls who do. and nonbinary people, and agender ones. there are lots of people with lots of different genders who look and act like what you think Girls and Only Girls look and act like, and other ones who look and act like what you think Boys and Only Boys look and act like. (but more on that later)

3. equating genitals with genderthis one should be kind of obvious, but it’s still something i see a lot so i guess i have to explain it too. i see a lotta people go “well i love boys because i love dick” or “i love girls because i love vaginas” and, i hate to break it to you, but not all boys have dicks and not all girls have vaginas. and, just like in #1, you can’t tell what genitals someone has until they take their pants off in front of you. you can’t say “i’m only attracted to people with vaginas who are girls” and then pass someone on the street and be like “hey, she’s cute” because you don’t know if she’s either of those things unless she’s crabwalking toward you nude while shouting “i’m a girl”. you’re welcome for that scenario.

4. nonbinary (and other) people don’t existafter all of this, you might say “well i’m attracted to only boys, because i’m attracted to x, x, and x characteristics, and i have never met a girl who has them”. which, a, you’re probably wrong, because all sorts of girls exist. but, b, there are most definitely nonbinary people who fit those criteria. not every nonbinary person is a thin afab person with some variation of a pixie cut. we look like all sorts of people. i’ve seen nonbinary people with six packs and full beards and i’ve seen nonbinary people who wear makeup, dresses, and have hair to their waist. plenty of us fit what you think a girl or a boy looks like. and i’ve seen plenty of gay and lesbian people express attraction to nonbinary people. i’ve seen people who are nonbinary end up in people’s #girls and #boys tags. and that is an act of erasure. we know you’re attracted to us, and a lot of times you know you are too. and continuing to say “i’m attracted to only girls” or “only boys” while still being attracted to nonbinary people is misgendering and erasure, and blatantly cissexist.

so, yeah, you might only want to fuck someone with a full beard, short hair, and strong jaw who wears button ups and chinos. but equating that to boy is cissexist, because that simply doesn’t mean boy. you might only want to date and marry people who wear skirts and pastels and wear makeup and have soft facial features, but that doesn’t make them a girl and that doesn’t mean you’re exclusively attracted to girls.

i’m not going to explicitly attack the label an individual uses to describe their sexuality. i have gay and lesbian friends, and i’m not going to tell them that they should stop calling themselves what they do.

but what i am saying is, gender is not binary, and there is lots of wiggle room. there are ltos of people who fit your perception of male or female who aren’t those things. the criteria people use to define themselves as explicitly attracted to people of one gender is not criteria that holds up when you account for the variation in presentation and personalities of people of all genders.

Right, Here we go.

let’s start out by defining monosexuality. monosexuality literally means the sexual attraction to only one gender, but the sexual attraction distinction is usually lost, and it most often gets used to refer to the combination of sexual and romantic attraction to one gender. monosexuality isn’t a sexual orientation, it’s an umbrella term that groups together straight, gay, and lesbian people. no, it is not an “inherently homophobic” term.

on the other hand, polysexual is the umbrella term that covers bisexuals, pansexuals, and other people who are attracted to more than one gender.

Okay, this is straightforward enough. 

the thing is, monosexuality is a social construct. it is not real. so, it really isn’t monosexuality that’s cissexist, but the insistence in its existence/identifying as monosexual (or, i should say, as a monosexual sexual orientation) that’s cissexist.

Okay I’m not even 100% sure what you are saying here, the wording is horrible. If you mean what I think you do, you are trying to claim that identifying as one of the monosexual sexualities is cissexist/transphobic? And that these sexualities are socially constructed/don’t actually exist?

Seriously? I’m pretty sure homosexuals and heterosexuals exist. I seriously don’t understand your reasoning to believe that these are social constructs or, even if they were, why you think they don’t exist?

in order for monosexuality to be real, it requires the belief in a few cissexist ideals.

And here we go

1. you can tell someone’s gender before they tell you what it is.

True enough

in order for someone to say “i am only attracted to boys”, they must believe that they can tell whether or not an attractive stranger is a boy before that stranger tells them whether or not they’re a boy.

Yeah, no. Not sure where you are pulling that from. 

there is no way to coincide the beliefs “appearance is not indicative of gender” and “i am only attracted to people of a specific gender”

No, there really is. I don’t see how the two are mutually exclusive terms in your mind. Gender and appearance are not linked in any way. 

2. there is a specific way to be a boy or girl this one is kinda like #1. in order to believe you’re only attracted to one gender, you must also believe that there’s a specific Girl Trait or Boy Trait that makes it so you only like one gender and not any others. let’s say someone asks you why you like girls and not boys. you might say that girls have soft skin or pretty eyes or whatever. but there’s boys with those traits too. and vice versa. there is no trait that only girls have that separates them from being boys other than the fact that they identify as being girls. and that’s a very weird trait that i don’t really think affects attraction. if you say you’re not attracted to boys because they’re smelly or loud or aggressive, well there’s plenty of boys who don’t fit into that, and plenty of girls who do. and nonbinary people, and agender ones. there are lots of people with lots of different genders who look and act like what you think Girls and Only Girls look and act like, and other ones who look and act like what you think Boys and Only Boys look and act like. (but more on that later)

Just like appearance, gender and behavioural traits are not linked in any way. Why you are saying I need to be attracted to guys and non-binaries I have no idea. because that is homophobic.

3. equating genitals with gender this one should be kind of obvious, but it’s still something i see a lot so i guess i have to explain it too. i see a lotta people go “well i love boys because i love dick” or “i love girls because i love vaginas” and, i hate to break it to you, but not all boys have dicks and not all girls have vaginas. and, just like in #1, you can’t tell what genitals someone has until they take their pants off in front of you. you can’t say “i’m only attracted to people with vaginas who are girls” and then pass someone on the street and be like “hey, she’s cute” because you don’t know if she’s either of those things unless she’s crabwalking toward you nude while shouting “i’m a girl”. you’re welcome for that scenario.

So we will gloss over the part reminding trans people about their genitals, because good job on that one. Trans people make up a very small part of the population, Occam’s razor works out in 99.9% of cases. It is also possible to be attracted to girls and not dongs. That’s fine, some people just are not attracted to them. 

Also finding someone cute and being sexually attracted to them are very very different things.

4. nonbinary (and other) people don’t exist after all of this, you might say “well i’m attracted to only boys, because i’m attracted to x, x, and x characteristics, and i have never met a girl who has them”. which, a, you’re probably wrong, because all sorts of girls exist. but, b, there are most definitely nonbinary people who fit those criteria. not every nonbinary person is a thin afab person with some variation of a pixie cut. we look like all sorts of people. i’ve seen nonbinary people with six packs and full beards and i’ve seen nonbinary people who wear makeup, dresses, and have hair to their waist. plenty of us fit what you think a girl or a boy looks like. and i’ve seen plenty of gay and lesbian people express attraction to nonbinary people. i’ve seen people who are nonbinary end up in people’s #girls and #boys tags. and that is an act of erasure. we know you’re attracted to us, and a lot of times you know you are too. and continuing to say “i’m attracted to only girls” or “only boys” while still being attracted to nonbinary people is misgendering and erasure, and blatantly cissexist.

And I bet that the attraction would die quite quickly once said person revealed their gender. Trying to shame someone into being attracted to a gender they are not attracted to is a terrible thing. Yes there is erasure going on, but fuck you for saying that I should be attracted to non-binaries.

so, yeah, you might only want to fuck someone with a full beard, short hair, and strong jaw who wears button ups and chinos. but equating that to boy is cissexist, because that simply doesn’t mean boy. you might only want to date and marry people who wear skirts and pastels and wear makeup and have soft facial features, but that doesn’t make them a girl and that doesn’t mean you’re exclusively attracted to girls.

Also true in a way. Being attracted to certain traits doesn’t make you attracted to a gender, being attracted to a gender does that.

using those labels while not aware of this is cissexist. continuing to use those labels while aware of this is still cissexist and just means you are knowingly upholding these structures instead of doing to out of ignorance.

Oh fuck off. I’m a lesbian, I am attracted to women. Not non-binaries, not men, just women.

But gender … That’s in your head. You can’t see it. No one knows what it is until you tell them. And hardly anyone is going to suddenly decide they’re into you because you come out to them as having a gender incongruent with your sex. (And if they do, they’re probably a fetishist.)

In order to prove OP wrong you logically have to believe that if a self-identified lesbian has sex with a pre-everything MtF transgender person and enjoys it, she is not a lesbian. That you can identify as whatever, but ultimately it is physical attraction that defines someone’s orientation. Also, if you disagree with the idea that “gender is nothing but what you identify as” you also have to believe that some people who claim to be trans are not trans. Meaning, there is such thing as “fake trans” and “real trans”.

The guy was pretty sex-obsessed though, his wife tweeted about how he was never up for doing anything romantic so it’s very likely he came up with the “open relationship” thing as a way to still be a “cool progressive husband” despite that.

The whole thing became a meme because the way the relationship “evolved” was fucking hysterical.

"wow my wife is out fucking dudes and I'm all alone at home. someone please fuck me, male, female, I don't care I just want to stick my dick in someone"

"dude you're an idiot"

"NO, OPEN RELATIONSHIPS TOTALLY WORK, WE TRUST EACH OTHER, THIS WILL TOTALLY LAST, SHUT UP!!!!!”

[a few months later]

"my wife divorced me"

White people: “Stop pulling the race card! Not everything is racial!”

*black coworker kills white newcasters in a terrible ambush with no indication of racial issues*

https://gma.yahoo.com/shooting-alleged-gunman-details-grievances-suicide-notes-190052437--abc-news-topstories.html

“What sent me over the top was the church shooting. And my hollow point bullets have the victims’ initials on them."

It is unclear whose initials he is referring to. He continues, “As for Dylann Roof? You (deleted)! You want a race war (deleted)? BRING IT THEN YOU WHITE …(deleted)!!!” He said Jehovah spoke to him, telling him to act.

L

O

“They said racist things” tweet should have been enough but this fucking tells it all:

“What sent me over the top was the church shooting. And my hollow point bullets have the victims’ initials on them."

It is unclear whose initials he is referring to. He continues, “As for Dylann Roof? You (deleted)! You want a race war (deleted)? BRING IT THEN YOU WHITE …(deleted)!!!” He said Jehovah spoke to him, telling him to act.

“BUTBUTBUT IT’S NOT ABOUT RACE AT ALL IT’S ACTUALLY ABOUT GUN CONTROL”

People conflate “objectification of women” with “attraction to women,” but this is wrong. Objectification is not ultimately about feeling attracted to someone, but about dehumanizing them. When we talk about “objectification of women,” we should be talking about misogyny and how women are reflexively seen as (sexual) objects for men’s use. Girls don’t have the same relation to this: we’re not being taught to see girls as objects for OUR use, but to see ourselves as objects for men. 

There isn’t something magical about being attracted to girls that suddenly puts us on the guys’ side of misogyny. Women don’t ever have “the male gaze” and we don’t ‘objectify women just as much as men do.’ 

My favorite asumari artists are sui_mame and umizenbiraki on twitter and pixiv. is this relevant to the discussion? Yes, because even they sexualize the living hell out of asumari. Literally nowhere is safe for an asumari fan who actually cares about characterization and sexuality like me, for other boards sexualize asumari even as a couple or completely wave off the little proof I have of their canon romance and go off and ship asushin to self-insert themselves unto Shinji.

If you check my ignore list, all of them are porn blogs that only post hentai of asumari. Half of my marisuka tag contains sexualized or mischaracterized crap that I literally just squeeze on to feel better.

Then literally everywhere, even in kawoshin and asumari focused content, Mari has been seen to be a pushy, perverted creep who only wants to get in Asuka’s pants. Mari has been fanon characterized to be like a saver, filler character for the male Evangelion fans out there; characterized to be a rapist and a self-insert. To even quote a comment on a hentai site- no man can touch my waifu if Mari is around- and shockingly, it even applies to most of the people who aren’t men that I have encountered that ship asumari. Knowing that they’re all Asuka fans, it’s surprising that even Asuka is mischaracterized too; showing her to be heavily abusive of Mari to the point that everyone thinks that it’s okay that Asuka punches Mari hard in most fanwork and then showing her not valuing Mari’s input (while she canonically does). They’re mischaracterizing her so much that you can’t even say that Shikinami is the worst version of Asuka- no, the dissolved and hypersexualized fanon Asuka is.

Don’t even try using asumari’s popularity against those who criticize your focus on your yaoi. This is a game of misogyny; which is less toxic? A community that focuses discussions on yaoi but ignores the female characters and their importance and even compares the focus on other male characters to justify their way of ignoring a huge part of the show, or a community that only cares to cater for male fantasy so much that sexualization and abusive behavior isn’t seen to be a problem anymore? Of course I’ll pick the care about the queer characters- there’s no less toxic choice.

I am an asumari blog, yet I cannot pick a favorite female character in Evangelion to save my life. I can appreciate them, see their troubles, and derail from being an asumari blog, even when the topic does not cater to my shipping needs and doesn’t relate Mari (my kin that I talk about often). I love these female characters, and you probably do too, but you’re too focused on seeing how something relates either Kaworu or Shinji.

So, tldr;

My whole issue with what anyone said can be used for both Mari and Kaworu, both their parts in the series are knocked down to a creepy queer character thats meaning is lost because of the that and the fact they weren’t the center of the anime and had smaller time slots. Like Mari with Asuka, Kaworu is seen as a predatar to Shinji.

I’ve seen more love for the girls coming from adult female fans(most having the pair kawoshin as one of their faves) Of course with any pair their are the younger crowd who don’t understand what ignore the female characters can do, but to generalize the entire kawoshin fandom like that is pretty much ignoring the magority of us. Don’t assume that’s why I used that pairing, I will go out of my to defend Mari because of her mischaracterization, because as a someone who can really likes Kowaru I know what its feels like to see a really great character get dragged through the mud over nonsense and a bunch of assholes pawning after the ‘waifu’

First, I’d like to acknowledge, that, yes, there’s less “safety” for kawoshin than, say, for asushin or other het ships, but there’s even less “safety” for asumari.

That’s due to homophobia, yes, and moreover, due to the lack of safety that female fans experience, fullstop. Female fans are derided wherever they go, except in safer communities such as tumblr; this also affects fans who are perceived as female. However, many of the fans of asumari who do not want it to be sexualised are queer women or woman-aligned nonbinaries ourselves, one of those “most hated audiences”. Obviously not everyone in the kawoshin fandom is straight or a woman; I personally know a lot of queer trans boys and so forth, or those who flocked to kawoshin due to canon queerness, but a majority of fanwork of kawoshin fans is created by straight women, just as the majority of fanwork of (sexualised) asumari is created by straight men. Kawoshin is brushed off as something that those “silly” girls do (and damn do I hate this misogyny) but asumari gets shat on by straight men threatened by it and straight girls repulsed by the idea of queer women and suffering from internalised misogyny. Straight men who like asumari have to asterisk their enjoyment of it with their status as straight men, of liking lesbians as a fetish, because it is literally more okay to

As for the asumari love from older female fans who have kawoshin as their main ship: I would love to see some proof of this. While I’m certain that there are people who ship both kawoshin and asumari, when I talk about those who operate in queer spaces, I’m not referring to people who mainly blog about kawoshin and then throw in a post about asumari here or there with a tag like “WATCH THE QUEEN CONQUER” and a smiley before descending back into kawoshin hell. Before you ask, of course you can use such tags, but it’s the concept of these tags standing in for an actual interest and investment in the characters.

I generally speaking have a rule against reblogging anything I deem sexualised (oftentimes, as an asexual person, I don’t recognise that something is meant to be sexualised until too late) but I’ve reblogged some asumari things I consider sexualised or mischaracterised due to simple desperation of content. In the extreme explosion of kawoshin fanwork you could find so many things that I can guarantee you that you could run a completely sfw non-sexualised kawoshin blog and never run into issues. By contrast asumari has a very small pool of fanwork, the vast majority of which is sexualised. Much like asurei, which is never given a thought beyond sexualised shit and the approx.. two artists on tumblr who draw them, ever. Most people don’t consider their complex relationship or handle it in a non-abusive; 99% of asurei art I see is just Rei and Asuka shoving their breasts and asses into the screen while making out and looking at the audience as though inviting them into the orgy. And it’s the same shit with asumari. Hell, I hardly see any nonsexualised Mari, dammit.

I can think of like two asumari artists who draw non-sexualised asumari, fullstop, and even then they draw nsfw fairly often. Because everyone hates queer women, or they hate queer women but also want to fuck them.

I really wish that people would learn to distinguish between popularity of a female character and popularity of a sexualised mischaracterised waifu-ised version of her. I can promise you that the “real” Asuka isn’t popular at all outside of the “she’s a b*tch but I’d hatefuck her” audience.

We’re not trying to take away your safe spaces. I understand about the queerness of kawo/shin; that’s what drew me to the ship in the first place, from which I started to explore other queer ships in the Evangelion fandom sphere. But do you not see the issue whereby the vast majority of fans on tumblr solely discuss two prominent male characters, and solely the two attractive underage male characters ripe for sexualisation? There’s a reason I avoid the hell out of places like r/Evangelion, EvaGeeks, and 90% of ev/a/, because I’m not going to fuck with the rampant sexualisation of female characters, either in heterosexual self-inserts with Shinji or in “queer relationships” due to the requirement of “keeping purity” (which is sick in so many ways) or as a method of sexualising females without the “threat” of a male involved.

Kaworu and Mari are not positioned similarly in the fandom whatsoever. Yes, Kaworu is misrepresented by homophobic straight men as a creepy stalker, and of course, there’s a lot of sexualisation of Shinji and Kaworu and romanticisation of their relationship that should not occur. I’m not saying that the fandom is perfect. But whereas Kaworu is doted on lovingly, Mari is portrayed as predatory and often sexually experienced coupled with making less experienced characters uncomfortable. Note: I’m not saying that portraying Mari as sexually experienced is inherently a bad thing. I’m talking about the common trend in kawoshin doujin and fanwork where Mari teaches sex ed to a Shinji (and less commonly Kaworu) who very definitely doesn’t want to exist in that space, even if they do eventually “want in” in that noncon-jk-con-but-not-really switch that so much fanwork tends to pull. There’s a lot of abusive shit I could say about karlshaun (manga Kaworu and Shinji), but that’s another story for another time. Asuka and Mari’s relationship is consistently sexualised with its violence intensified. I like them as a battle couples and I like the thought of them physically training with one another or sparring, but there is a complete difference between two people who are equally matched in fighting prowess and Asuka randomly fucking punching Mari. I’m guilty of this sometimes in my attempt to search for asumari stuff but I would never willingly put that into my asumari fanwork, while I see that so god damn often despite its OOCness.

And regarding safety, you know, I, and others I know, have been attacked on this very website for trying to defend female characters such as Asuka from those who consider her more popular or whatever than Shinji despite all of the very real shit that she gets. I’ve received death threats from people telling me to stop putting down Shinji or Kaworu, and been called plenty of slurs. Now, I don’t care about them, because I have thick skin and they’re just random ass anons, but more sensitive fans, especially those struggling with the heavy burden of internalised misogyny and queerphobia—just think about it.

And holy shit will you stop deriding “those sixteen-year-olds”? Because some of the very “sixteen-year-olds” you’re talking about are those queer femme asumari shippers who are just looking for a lil bit of representation in this world, a reminder that it’s okay to exist and be them that isn’t presented in an overtly sexualised way that strips them down and pushes them out as products for the male gaze.

I’m not going to blame women for their internalised misogyny. Yet since you want me to stop talking about sixteen-year-olds and clearly position yourself above them, fine, I’ll assume you’re an adult, so I really do have to ask: Why do you have to focus on two male characters, and specifically underage male characters?

That isn’t a personal attack. I’m asking you to reflect on this for yourself.

I don’t care whether real people give a shit about some “best girl” or favoured character of mine. I’m not talking about that. Real people > fictional people every time. And yet I can’t sit idly by while all of the other characters in Evangelion are ignored or sexualised, many of them (perceived) women. I’m reaching out specifically on tumblr, known for its high presence of female and nonbinary fans, because I trust female characters in the hands of women/femme nb more than I trust them in the hands of men, but the sheer homophobia—

Any time someone points out the lack of safety for fans of asumari, especially underage fans reaching out for scraps of representation, kawoshin fans pop out of the snow like daises to rabidly claim that no no kawoshin and Kaworu are truly the most hated things in this fandom. I know that people get shit for kawoshin and Kaworu all of the time, yet there’s no way to compare. When you removed the sexualised male gaze-y “lesbian fetish” parts of asumari the fandom barely exists.

Even the fucking official art of kawoshin versus asumari—

These are the two image sets commonly paired together on “queer eva” posts on tumblr dot corn. Notice how Kaworu and Shinji, despite being in skintight plugsuits, aren’t sexualised; in front the nice little chest plates there give them form and definition as they face one another in mutual affection.

Now look at how Asuka is wearing that oversexualised plugsuit from 2.0, how uncomfortable she looks as though asking to be protected (how moe), while Mari is positioned in such a way that emphasises her breasts (one of her arms is even moved forward so that you can see that full breast at the front) and her spine somehow bends up so that you can see her “shapely” rear and the line of her ass. And how oddly predatory Mari looks here. It’s like Asuka is pleading for the audience to take her away from Mari. Which isn’t how they interact in canon, either in the 2.0 drafts or in 3.0, where despite their constant banter with one another they depend on and listen to one another.

Do you not realise how fucked this is? When Studio Khara decides to put official art of Kaworu, Studio Khara draws them on the poster sitting next to one another connected by a symbolic string of fate. Meanwhile Asuka and Mari are always drawn in positions that expose and sexualise them. This shit goes all of the way to the top.

This isn’t a cherrypicked example either. If you google asumari official art and kawoshin official art you’ll immediately see what I mean.

“But they were better written!” Mari is so god damn mischaracterised. Kaworu is mischaracterised to some extent too, as in Shinji, but not to the extent that Mari and Asuka face, whether in male- or female-dominated fandom space. Part of this is the fault of the films which appear to be entirely ready to throw away any possible characterisation. Yet we’re talking about a fandom that spins entire five thousand word analyses from two seconds of Kaworu’s animation, and you’re going to tell me that a character who has a compelling story especially given the manga is just brushed aside? Tell me about the Mari who apparently knew Yui in college and had to deal with the internalised homophobia of watching her from afar. Tell me about the Mari who recognised her own inability to pass into adulthood, who went to Stanford and somehow ended up either getting the Curse of Eva or being cryogenically frozen or what have you, who now experiences time-borne culture shock, who works for IPEA and is involved in some sneaky spy business, who (in the drafts) lived with Hikari and engaged with Asuka, who appears to consider the Ayanami series a copy of Yui rather than their own people and likely requires some sort of arc of understanding to that end, who’s over her internalised homophobia by this point and probably sets an example for the others, who has been dealing with this shit longer than Asuka and who would understand Asuka’s suffocating feelings of never being adult enough. There are so many places I could go with this but instead the collective fandom chooses to scream about the latest piece of official art with Kaworu and Shinji anywhere in the same picture and parade it around as “SEE? SEE? IT REALLY IS CANON!” while completely ignoring the canon or heavily implied f/f such as asumari or ritsumaya.

You guys will take apart a storyboard of Kaworu and Shinji in the same room and write fanfictions from here to the moon but you can’t do the same to a character with a compelling arc and backstory, and with arguably just a complex characterisation on screen. Because you’d prefer to come up with literal hundreds of thousands of words of alternative universe for your pretty boy male fans without giving a single shit about anyone else from the universe.

And if you want to do that? Fine. Enjoy yourself. But if people are pointing out the reality of the crapshoot that is queer femme fandom then don’t butt in with your “not all kawoshin shippers” shit.

I apologise if at any point in this I should, ahem, upset. But there was no need for you to take a post about asumari, pointing out very important facts about fandom culture in places that are supposedly safe spaces for femme-aligned and queer fans, and make it about kawoshin. There was no need.

My favorite asumari artists are sui_mame and umizenbiraki on twitter and pixiv. is this relevant to the discussion? Yes, because even they sexualize the living hell out of asumari. Literally nowhere is safe for an asumari fan who actually cares about characterization and sexuality like me, for other boards sexualize asumari even as a couple or completely wave off the little proof I have of their canon romance and go off and ship asushin to self-insert themselves unto Shinji.

If you check my ignore list, all of them are porn blogs that only post hentai of asumari. Half of my marisuka tag contains sexualized or mischaracterized crap that I literally just squeeze on to feel better.

Then literally everywhere, even in kawoshin and asumari focused content, Mari has been seen to be a pushy, perverted creep who only wants to get in Asuka’s pants. Mari has been fanon characterized to be like a saver, filler character for the male Evangelion fans out there; characterized to be a rapist and a self-insert. To even quote a comment on a hentai site- no man can touch my waifu if Mari is around- and shockingly, it even applies to most of the people who aren’t men that I have encountered that ship asumari. Knowing that they’re all Asuka fans, it’s surprising that even Asuka is mischaracterized too; showing her to be heavily abusive of Mari to the point that everyone thinks that it’s okay that Asuka punches Mari hard in most fanwork and then showing her not valuing Mari’s input (while she canonically does). They’re mischaracterizing her so much that you can’t even say that Shikinami is the worst version of Asuka- no, the dissolved and hypersexualized fanon Asuka is.

Don’t even try using asumari’s popularity against those who criticize your focus on your yaoi. This is a game of misogyny; which is less toxic? A community that focuses discussions on yaoi but ignores the female characters and their importance and even compares the focus on other male characters to justify their way of ignoring a huge part of the show, or a community that only cares to cater for male fantasy so much that sexualization and abusive behavior isn’t seen to be a problem anymore? Of course I’ll pick the care about the queer characters- there’s no less toxic choice.

I am an asumari blog, yet I cannot pick a favorite female character in Evangelion to save my life. I can appreciate them, see their troubles, and derail from being an asumari blog, even when the topic does not cater to my shipping needs and doesn’t relate Mari (my kin that I talk about often). I love these female characters, and you probably do too, but you’re too focused on seeing how something relates either Kaworu or Shinji.

So, tldr;

“and shockingly, it even applies to most of the people who aren’t men that I have encountered that ship asumari“

did you ever consider that maybe

maybe

MAYBE

the girls drawing the “problematic male pandering” art do so not because they want to please men but because they genuinely like that stuff

Landmark case in Toronto underway - man faces 6 months in jail over criminal harassment charges for debating against feminists on Twitter regarding call-out culture

Christie Blatchford: Ruling in Twitter harassment trial could have enormous fallout for free speech

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What’s believed to be the first case in Canada of alleged criminal harassment-via-Twitter is just a judge’s decision away from being over.

After hearing closing submissions Tuesday from Chris Murphy, who represents 54-year-old Greg Elliott, Ontario Court Judge Brent Knazan is expected to rule on Oct. 6.

In the balance rides enormous potential fallout for free speech online.

Elliott is charged with criminally harassing two Toronto female political activists, Steph Guthrie and Heather Reilly, in 2012.

Allegations involving a third woman were dropped.

The graphic artist and father of four lost his job shortly after his arrest, which was well-publicized online, and if convicted, could go to jail for six months.

These are astonishing repercussions given that it’s not alleged he ever threatened either woman (or any other, according to the testimony of the Toronto Police officer, Detective Jeff Bangild, who was in charge) or that he ever sexually harassed them.

Indeed, Elliott’s chief sin appears to have been that he dared to disagree with the two young feminists and political activists.

He and Guthrie, for instance, initially fell out over his refusal to endorse her plan to “sic the Internet” upon a young man in Northern Ontario who had invented a violent video game, where users could punch an image of a feminist video blogger named Anita Sarkeesian until the screen turned red.

Guthrie Tweeted at the time that she wanted the inventor’s “hatred on the Internet to impact his real-life experience” and Tweeted to prospective employers to warn them off the young man and even sent the local newspaper in his town a link to the story about the game.

Elliott disagreed with the tactic and Tweeted he thought the shaming “was every bit as vicious as the face-punch game”.

Until then, the two were collegial online, with Elliott offering to produce a free poster for Guthrie’s witopoli (Women in Toronto Politics) group.

As serious as the ramifications of a conviction could be for Elliott, so could they be dire for free speech online, Murphy suggested in his final arguments.

He said the idea that all it takes to end up charged with criminal harassment is vigorous participation in online debate with those who will not brook dissent “will have a chilling effect on people’s ability to communicate, and not just on Twitter”.

In fact, Murphy said that contrary to what Guthrie and Reilly testified to at trial, they weren’t afraid of his client — as suggested by both their spirited demeanour in the witness box and their deliberate online campaign to call Elliott out as a troll.

Rather, Murphy said, they hated Elliott and were determined to silence him — not just by “blocking” his Tweets to them, but by demanding he cease even referring to them even in making comment about heated political issues.

To all this, Guthrie pointed out once in cross-examination that feelings of fear, like all feelings, “develop over time”, and snapped that she was sorry she wasn’t “a perfect victim” who behaved like a conventional victim.

The criminal harassment charge is rooted in the alleged victim’s perception of the offending conduct.

The statute says if that conduct caused the alleged victims “reasonably, in all the circumstances, to fear for their safety”, that’s good enough.

Yet Guthrie and Reilly didn’t behave as though they were remotely frightened or intimidated: They convened a meeting of friends to discuss how Elliott should be publicly shamed; they bombarded their followers with furious tweets and retweets about him (including a grotesque suggestion from someone pretending she was a 13-year-old that he was a pedophile); they could and did dish it out.

“They were not vulnerable,” Murphy said once. “They are very accomplished, politically savvy women. If they can’t handle being mentioned in the tail end of a political discussion (on Twitter), then they’re in the wrong business.” And, he said, of the meeting both women attended in August of 2012, to discuss how Elliott would be called out, “That was a conspiracy to commit a criminal offence … they were conspiring to go out and publicly shame Mr. Elliott.” Murphy said the case was akin to “a high school spat, except it’s adults on the Internet”, and said it is astonishing that the court should be acting as referee in an online political debate.“If anybody was being criminally harassed in this case,” Murphy told the judge, “it was my client, it was Mr. Elliott.” That Reilly, who was anonymous on Twitter and who directed her own volley of hateful tweets at Elliott, should come “to this court and the police and say she’s being criminally harassed is an abuse of the system.” Prosecutor Marnie Goldenberg made only the briefest remarks, and refused to provide Postmedia with a copy of her written arguments, saying it wasn’t her practice.

I know I said I would try to avoid political blogging but I think this is too important. The fact that this even got to court chills me. That someone could abuse the system to claim harassment over a disagreement sets a very unsettling precedent for our discourse.

I became a leftist because I had nothing but disgust for totalitarianism and authoritarianism. To see the tools used by fascists being wielded by those I would otherwise consider my ideological peers is horrifying. This is not my political movement. This is not the left I was drawn to when Bush was in the White House.